Episode 2: Men Who Don't Use Soap

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Welcome back to our podcast.
We're coming at you from the

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sacred land of Zion, AKA Utah.
I'm.

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Claire and I'm Mel and together
we are the salty hoes.

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Before we dive into our topic
for today, Claire, how was your

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week?
It's been a week.

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I am tired.
It's it's one of those weeks

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that's felt like a year, but you
know this, I had an interesting

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presentation this.
Week.

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I feel like our audience needs
to hear about this though.

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Yeah, it was probably the most
interesting presentation I think

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I've ever give.
Not in terms of content, but

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just You've ever had the fortune
Ford slash misfortune to read

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Ulysses?
I have read Ulysses actually,

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and I'm afraid I didn't
understand it all.

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Yeah, I think it's kind of book
you read and you're just like,

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what was that?
Totally like no storyline?

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Well, there is a storyline, but
it's it's deeply confusing.

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But I was assigned I think
'cause I'm like the old person

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in the class.
I got the fever.

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Sex stream chapter.
Amazing.

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Yeah.
Do you remember anything about

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that chapter?
Not really, it's been a really

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long time since I read it.
It was college, so that was more

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years than I really care to
mention.

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It's it's been a wee minute.
A wee minute.

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Well, that's OK.
Like technically I shouldn't be

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back here, but here I am.
And.

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And that's another podcast
episode.

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But yeah, so I I had to say
things to the class like, you

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know, talking by uncorking your
butt hole and straddling

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people's faces and sticking your
arm into people's fulvas.

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I mean, if you've read the
chapter you'll know I'm not

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being smutty like I'm just
quoting from the text, but.

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Yeah, I like two of those
things.

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Yeah, I mean, but stuff is
great.

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Face straddling is great.
I'm not such a fan of an arm up

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of over though.
Yeah, cuz I mean, it just, it

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feels very like you're at the
Doctor, not like super fun.

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Also feels a little unsanitary,
which kind of relates to what

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we're talking about today.
That is a great tie in.

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What are we talking about today?
Well, our topic today is men who

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don't use soap.
Oh, and the reason we're talking

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about this today is because an
article with that title came

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across my news feed.
This was published in Esquire

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magazine on October 13th, 2025,
and the title is Men Who Don't

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Use Soap explained.
Are you excited?

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Are we going to explain this?
I'm just very disappointed that

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this is a 2025 article.
I was hoping you'd say like in

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the 80s and then didn't wash.
Or like the 1500s, maybe we'll

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get to that.
Well, the blurb under the title

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is, and I quote There are people
in your life, healthy,

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successful, attractive men who
wash themselves with water only?

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Are they actually getting
themselves clean?

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Do they smell?
Should you consider trying this

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method?
No, like we don't need any

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research, no.
All right, so your gut reaction

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is you're not that interested in
the no SOAP method.

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I am not interested.
And you know what else I'm not

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interested in?
I'm not interested in the no

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washing instrument either.
So like that's the wrong word.

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But like a sponge or a beast
cloth or an exfoliator, you

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know, like I feel like you only
get so far with your hands

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soaked up.
Like you also need.

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What would you call that?
I don't know accessories.

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Accessories, there you go.
You need a implements, yes, a

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SOAP implement and or accessory
to yeah, not just the water, not

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just the water lads, that's no.
OK, I like that, Claire, but I

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feel like, you know, if we
already can't get men to use

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soap, we're asking a lot to have
a sponge or a loofah or a

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washcloth on board, too.
It's so hard for men these days.

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I mean, I can't even buy a bed
frame.

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Yeah, that's, that's fair.
So I mean, is expecting SOAP and

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an accessory.
That's a lot.

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I don't know.
Well, we're going to find out.

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Should we dive a little deeper
into this article?

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Let's dive deeper.
I want some data.

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Give me some data.
I've personal data, but let's

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let's look at the facts.
OK, well, this might be more

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along the lines of anecdotes,
but that's all right.

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We're going to jump in.
OK, The article goes on to say,

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quote, this is not a Make
America Healthy Again idea.

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RFK Junior isn't seeking a ban
on Irish Spring, though Stephen

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Miller may try to deport it.
Racist I'm.

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Personally.
Offended.

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Well, you should be.
You're Irish after all.

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I am indeed.
You may recall that in 2024, our

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current health secretary
appeared in a video in the

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shower to promote his wife
Cheryl Hines's beauty products.

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Wait.
What?

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So I need to look this up.
I haven't seen this, not that I

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I mean, I have a visceral
reaction to see an RFK junior in

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the shower and it's it's not a
reaction of attraction.

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Yeah, I wouldn't say it's hot.
Oh, we'll have to look that up.

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Yeah, decidedly not hot at.
Least he's using SOAP though.

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True, that's a good.
Point.

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That's a bonus.
All right, we'll try it on.

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Or maybe a cleaning implement
even?

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Oh, Cheryl, what have you got?
Well, we're going to get up.

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We're going to have to check
this out.

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If we find out, we're going to
put it in the show notes, but we

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will get back to you on that
one.

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I'm going to quote a little more
from the article.

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As far as I can tell, the
Seminole moment for the anti

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soap movement was a 2016 article
in The Atlantic, which this is a

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prestigious.
Yeah.

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You know what would you call it?
Magazine.

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Yeah, they're not.
Like they're just not doing sort

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of sensational tripe.
Yeah, they and their science

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writing is really solid, I have
to say.

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All right.
So by physician and writer James

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Hamblin.
He had given up soap, shampoo,

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deodorant, even showering.
Oh dear God.

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And there's a quote from
Hamblin, he says.

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At first I was an oily, smelly
beast.

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Oh God.
But after a while, your

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ecosystem reaches a steady state
and you stop smelling bad.

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I mean, you don't smell like
rosewater or Axe body spray, but

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you don't smell like BBO either.
You just smell like a person.

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What is that smell like though?
I mean did he just stop smelling

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himself?
Like who was giving him this

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data?
Point I wonder I did look him up

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I found his Instagram and he has
a small baby so he has

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reproduced.
He has reproduced, so hopefully

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that wasn't too horrific.
Hopefully it was before or after

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his experiment.
No, I think he's still doing.

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Oh, he's continued.
It.

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I believe so, yeah.
Wow.

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There were no pictures of his
wife or partner that I could

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find.
OK, but I wonder.

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We need to get her on the show.
For the truth, right?

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I wonder if she also practices
this this no SOAP movement.

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Yeah, we have a We have a lot to
unpack here, Claire.

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Oh, my God.
A lot.

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Yeah, there there is a lot
happening here.

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I just he did he say how long it
took to get to the state that he

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just smelt like a person.
I'm like what does a person

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actually smell like?
Like what is person smell like?

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I've never seen a candle or like
a a fragrance that's like person

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smell like I get firm ones and
all that but like.

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What is person smell?
Person smell?

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Wow, that just, I mean, this is
going back a little bit, but you

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just made me think of Fight Club
person candles.

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Yeah, right.
Yeah, that's maybe that's what

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it smells like.
I'm not sure I know what a

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person smell is for someone who
doesn't, you know, use soap.

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Yeah, I can't imagine it's good
because like I feel like I don't

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smell fragrancy from my soap,
but it obviously is like a

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degreaser, right?
Like he said the word degrease,

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like there is grease on the
body.

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Could you imagine a sheets?
I want to see a sheet.

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I'm like.
Throwing up in my mouth a little

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bit right now, Claire.
Honestly so bad it's pretty

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gross.
It's it's pretty bad.

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Like I would even take Axe body
spray over that and like that's

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that's.
Never good.

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Wow, that's saying a lot.
Yeah.

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I mean, I think that people
smell good, but these are people

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who have washed, right?
Like, tell me what you think.

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But I think when someone like
maybe a man, an attractive man

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is sweating, I like that smell.
I think that's a good smell

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like.
Clean.

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Sweat.
Clean sweat.

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Clean sweat, I get it.
Is that you're the scientist?

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Is that like a pheromone thing?
What is?

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That well, that's an interesting
question.

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Pheromones.
Still to this day, we haven't

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isolated a human pheromone.
So do they exist?

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Who knows?
Definitely they exist in other

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species.
Potentially they exist in us.

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We know that smell is actually
really important.

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And it is, yes.
Have I ever told you about the

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sweaty T-shirt experiment?
Oh no, tell me.

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About that.
Oh, goodness.

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OK, Well, hopefully I get all
the details right.

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I haven't looked at it in a
minute.

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Yeah, but a wee minute, as you
would say.

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A wee minute.
You haven't looked in a wee

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minute.
I haven't looked in a wee

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minute, but as I remember it
goes something like this.

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And the reason that this was
performed first of all was

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because we have some, we have
some experimental evidence from

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other species like mice, that
mice select mates based on

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smell.
And this is really common for

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mammals.
It's actually really weird for

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us as people to select mates
based on vision alone.

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OK, so smells important, we know
that.

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And we also have some evidence
that animals like mice are

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selecting mates that are
genetically dissimilar to

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themselves.
Oh yeah.

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That's all very interesting.
My God.

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I mean, can you?
We're here in Utah.

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So, can you think of any reason
why you might want to pick

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someone genetically quite
different from yourself?

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Can you even find somebody
genetically dissimilar from

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yourself in Utah Is also my
question.

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Well, that is a really good
question because of course the

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reason is you want to avoid
inbreeding, OK?

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You want that outbreeding to get
healthy offspring.

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So you're not, you know, having
offspring with genetic disease

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or big cans or something?
Like something weird happening.

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Or the impulse to not use SOAP,
I don't know.

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Yeah, Oh my God.
Anyway, yeah, so they recruited

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a bunch of college students to
do this experiment.

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And college students are great
for experiments because they're

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poor and you can pay them to do
things.

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So they divided them into male
and female and they had the men

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come in first and they gave them
all an identical white T-shirt.

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They asked them to wear that
T-shirt for some number of days

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without wearing deodorant or any
products or showering.

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So we get a lot of nice odor on
that shirt.

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Oh.
Yeah, I'm sure that that was

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easier for some participants and
others they're like, so just

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live then.
They're like, got it, You're

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going to pay me for just wearing
this shirt?

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Cool.
And then after however long, and

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I don't think it was terribly
long, maybe a couple days, the

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men came back in, returned their
T-shirts, and then they brought

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the female volunteers in to
sniff all of the T-shirts.

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Yum.
And rank them according to how

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attractive they found the smell
and what they found because they

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did blood testing as well.
Is at least with one genetic

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marker as I remember this, that
women tended to prefer men who

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were genetically dissimilar to
themselves.

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So that replicates what we see
in mice.

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So what you're telling me is
either when I go on a diet I

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just have to walk up and smell
the person to see if we're

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00:12:13,560 --> 00:12:18,840
genetically dissimilar enough or
like where is the app with like

228
00:12:18,840 --> 00:12:20,960
smell your mate before your
date?

229
00:12:21,080 --> 00:12:23,160
Oh my God that's amazing.
That's a wee.

230
00:12:23,200 --> 00:12:24,760
I didn't even realize that would
rhyme.

231
00:12:24,760 --> 00:12:27,000
Smell your mate before your
date.

232
00:12:27,000 --> 00:12:28,120
I love it.
Oh my God.

233
00:12:28,160 --> 00:12:29,720
I.
Would love to, although for you

234
00:12:29,720 --> 00:12:33,720
I think since you are an
immigrant probably there's not a

235
00:12:33,720 --> 00:12:37,680
lot of relatives around for me
though with some deep roots in

236
00:12:37,680 --> 00:12:39,200
Utah and the Mormon church.
Oh.

237
00:12:39,200 --> 00:12:41,880
You're in trouble, maybe.
I should be sniffing these men.

238
00:12:42,000 --> 00:12:44,880
Real carefully, Yeah, you're in
trouble.

239
00:12:44,880 --> 00:12:47,400
You're going to, you're going
to, you're going to accidentally

240
00:12:47,400 --> 00:12:49,160
date your second cousin or
something.

241
00:12:49,680 --> 00:12:53,480
Gross.
Yeah, but if they shower, sure.

242
00:12:53,560 --> 00:12:55,520
OK, fine.
I mean, I'm not having any more

243
00:12:55,520 --> 00:12:58,280
kids, so, you know, I guess
we're all right.

244
00:12:58,400 --> 00:13:02,120
Yeah.
Is there is there a consequence

245
00:13:02,120 --> 00:13:04,240
if you don't?
It's just about breeding, right?

246
00:13:04,360 --> 00:13:07,520
Yeah.
So like, you can fuck your

247
00:13:07,520 --> 00:13:09,800
cousin if you want but just
don't have babies?

248
00:13:10,120 --> 00:13:12,400
Well, I mean, I mean,
historically a lot of people

249
00:13:12,400 --> 00:13:14,360
have fucked their cousins and
have babies.

250
00:13:14,400 --> 00:13:17,800
And most of the time, actually,
you only have a somewhat

251
00:13:17,800 --> 00:13:19,840
elevated risk of genetic
disease.

252
00:13:20,200 --> 00:13:22,800
But when it becomes a habit,
then you've got a problem.

253
00:13:22,840 --> 00:13:26,160
You know, like those FLDS
communities down in Colorado

254
00:13:26,160 --> 00:13:29,240
City, We know there's a high
incidence of genetic disease

255
00:13:29,240 --> 00:13:30,480
down there.
There should be a lot of

256
00:13:30,480 --> 00:13:33,000
sniffing happening.
Gross.

257
00:13:33,000 --> 00:13:34,520
I don't want to sniff anyone
down there.

258
00:13:35,840 --> 00:13:38,360
And actually, this ties into the
question I want to ask you.

259
00:13:38,360 --> 00:13:40,800
So you are the humanities
professor.

260
00:13:40,800 --> 00:13:45,600
OK, So in historical periods, or
maybe even in places today where

261
00:13:45,600 --> 00:13:49,440
soap and maybe even daily
showering aren't really a thing,

262
00:13:49,760 --> 00:13:53,080
how bad do people smell?
How bad did people smell like

263
00:13:53,080 --> 00:13:56,480
throughout history?
You know, this is a subject I've

264
00:13:56,480 --> 00:14:00,440
never covered in my research,
but maybe I should have.

265
00:14:00,720 --> 00:14:04,440
But don't you think though,
like, I mean, this again is me

266
00:14:04,440 --> 00:14:06,480
surprising.
I don't have an answer.

267
00:14:06,480 --> 00:14:10,760
But don't people like turn to
the earth then you know what I'd

268
00:14:10,760 --> 00:14:13,120
like?
They'll take a twig and brush

269
00:14:13,120 --> 00:14:15,320
their teeth.
I've heard those stories, right?

270
00:14:15,400 --> 00:14:20,400
There must have been some way
for them, you know, to to make

271
00:14:20,400 --> 00:14:23,760
so bad.
I guess if you look like my

272
00:14:23,760 --> 00:14:28,360
soap, it's made of olive oil.
So I would imagine people

273
00:14:28,360 --> 00:14:32,000
develop methods over time that
they just didn't smell gross,

274
00:14:32,000 --> 00:14:34,440
maybe smelling gross and not
washing as a modern day

275
00:14:34,440 --> 00:14:37,040
phenomena.
Because I feel like, you know,

276
00:14:37,480 --> 00:14:41,200
historically people would have
just used natural things.

277
00:14:41,760 --> 00:14:44,120
Yeah, that's probably true.
I mean, and of course, we're

278
00:14:44,120 --> 00:14:45,840
limping a lot of things
together.

279
00:14:45,840 --> 00:14:49,080
Like, we know, for example, the
Romans were really into bathing,

280
00:14:49,080 --> 00:14:50,600
right?
They went to the public baths

281
00:14:50,600 --> 00:14:53,200
pretty much every day and got
themselves clean.

282
00:14:53,200 --> 00:14:56,400
And I imagine they used whatever
equivalent of soap there was,

283
00:14:56,400 --> 00:14:58,440
right?
They scraped themselves off with

284
00:14:58,440 --> 00:15:01,080
metal instruments.
So they were removing that

285
00:15:01,080 --> 00:15:05,440
grease that Doctor Hamblin seems
to be so fond of.

286
00:15:06,120 --> 00:15:08,560
That's fair.
Yeah, that's a great point.

287
00:15:08,600 --> 00:15:11,640
I should have known that you
should not take my humanities

288
00:15:11,640 --> 00:15:14,040
classes.
No, I absolutely should.

289
00:15:14,040 --> 00:15:17,360
I don't think that hygiene in
the past is your specialty.

290
00:15:18,160 --> 00:15:20,000
It, it should be.
But you're right.

291
00:15:20,000 --> 00:15:25,360
I remember going to the Roman
baths in Bath that we time in

292
00:15:25,360 --> 00:15:29,960
England and yeah, like people
did the bathing for a long time.

293
00:15:30,240 --> 00:15:31,840
Yeah, you take the waters,
right?

294
00:15:31,840 --> 00:15:36,880
Yeah, there's no excuse.
We've regressed, We have

295
00:15:36,880 --> 00:15:40,400
regressed, We've gone backwards.
All right, here's the next line

296
00:15:40,400 --> 00:15:42,960
in the article.
Because evolutionarily, why

297
00:15:42,960 --> 00:15:45,760
would be?
Why would we be so disgusting

298
00:15:45,760 --> 00:15:49,800
that we need constant cleaning
and constant moisturizing and or

299
00:15:49,800 --> 00:15:52,160
de oiling?
Oh my God.

300
00:15:52,160 --> 00:15:55,240
The oil thing is that's become a
real thing for us, that's for

301
00:15:55,240 --> 00:15:57,560
sure.
It makes my skin crawl.

302
00:15:57,560 --> 00:16:00,920
I don't want to touch oil.
Yeah.

303
00:16:00,920 --> 00:16:03,400
Not somebody else's oil.
I mean, I touch your oil.

304
00:16:03,720 --> 00:16:07,760
I'd be fine with your oil but
like because I know you wash.

305
00:16:07,960 --> 00:16:11,480
I do everyday actually.
Wow, I know.

306
00:16:11,480 --> 00:16:13,400
Amazing.
How do you know to do that,

307
00:16:13,400 --> 00:16:16,000
Melissa?
Like seriously, like how do you

308
00:16:16,000 --> 00:16:17,880
know?
Did somebody tell you?

309
00:16:17,920 --> 00:16:21,520
Did you get a book like?
Well, gosh, I don't even

310
00:16:21,520 --> 00:16:22,520
remember.
Yeah.

311
00:16:23,360 --> 00:16:25,160
Point being, like, you just
know.

312
00:16:25,160 --> 00:16:27,920
I just know.
You know when you feel like,

313
00:16:27,920 --> 00:16:29,480
let's get into the body here.
Like you.

314
00:16:29,560 --> 00:16:33,640
Oh, you feel like you.
You feel you.

315
00:16:33,640 --> 00:16:37,080
Just feel I can feel oily and
no, it's time for a shower.

316
00:16:37,360 --> 00:16:39,200
Especially when you start to
smell yourself.

317
00:16:39,200 --> 00:16:40,400
Oh.
It's not the.

318
00:16:40,400 --> 00:16:42,800
Worst that is.
I mean, you know you've crossed

319
00:16:42,800 --> 00:16:44,720
a line by the time you can smell
yourself.

320
00:16:44,720 --> 00:16:48,240
Absolutely.
And yeah, and sometimes it's

321
00:16:48,240 --> 00:16:49,480
bad.
I actually had an experience

322
00:16:49,480 --> 00:16:50,480
with that.
You want me to?

323
00:16:50,480 --> 00:16:53,160
Yes, yes I do.
I went to, I was very ambitious

324
00:16:53,160 --> 00:16:56,840
and I went to a Wii cycle class
like very early in the morning.

325
00:16:57,160 --> 00:17:01,120
And so I neurotically showered
right before I went to bed

326
00:17:01,120 --> 00:17:04,200
because I'm like, I want to go
clean because you you can't work

327
00:17:04,200 --> 00:17:06,160
up a sweat and put that on other
people.

328
00:17:06,280 --> 00:17:08,400
Oh my gosh, you're a yoga
instructor?

329
00:17:08,480 --> 00:17:11,079
OK pet peeve.
People that come to yoga class

330
00:17:11,079 --> 00:17:12,800
without showering.
It's disgusting.

331
00:17:12,800 --> 00:17:15,480
It's not OK because they think,
oh I'll go because I'll be

332
00:17:15,480 --> 00:17:17,640
sweating anyway.
And it's like, but you know,

333
00:17:17,640 --> 00:17:20,319
it's like the bacteria that
causes the smell like.

334
00:17:20,319 --> 00:17:23,920
So it's on you.
And yeah, that's.

335
00:17:24,079 --> 00:17:25,800
This is why I don't do hot yoga,
Claire.

336
00:17:27,079 --> 00:17:30,400
Well, I feel like all hot yoga
places smell like feet anyway.

337
00:17:30,400 --> 00:17:33,200
Like they're, it just becomes
embedded, you know, like when

338
00:17:33,200 --> 00:17:37,080
you wear those workout clothes
just fresh out of the dryer and

339
00:17:37,080 --> 00:17:40,160
then you sweat and they like
activate it and you're like, Oh

340
00:17:40,160 --> 00:17:42,680
my God.
Like it's, it's just so deep in

341
00:17:42,680 --> 00:17:45,360
there.
I need to to burn these, these

342
00:17:45,360 --> 00:17:49,320
clothes.
But so I washed for my exercise

343
00:17:49,320 --> 00:17:52,200
class the night before because I
wasn't trying at 5:30 in the

344
00:17:52,200 --> 00:17:53,360
morning.
Like I wasn't going to get

345
00:17:53,360 --> 00:17:55,680
ridiculous about it.
But I'm like, I'm clean.

346
00:17:55,680 --> 00:17:58,240
I'm in clean jammies.
I have clean clothes.

347
00:17:58,280 --> 00:17:59,960
I'll be clean.
You probably even wash your

348
00:17:59,960 --> 00:18:02,160
sheets.
They were probably clean sheets,

349
00:18:02,160 --> 00:18:04,760
yeah.
So like everything was clean for

350
00:18:04,760 --> 00:18:09,400
like 6 hours before I got up but
I went and I got this waft and I

351
00:18:09,400 --> 00:18:13,640
was like fuck is that?
And it was it was me and what

352
00:18:13,640 --> 00:18:15,520
had happened.
Has this ever happened to you?

353
00:18:15,520 --> 00:18:19,680
I'd gotten new deodorant and I
definitely go the natural end of

354
00:18:19,680 --> 00:18:21,440
things.
But you know how sometimes you

355
00:18:21,440 --> 00:18:25,360
get new deodorant and it just
doesn't do well with yourself?

356
00:18:26,160 --> 00:18:30,320
And even though I was clean, I
put on this deodorant and I just

357
00:18:30,400 --> 00:18:36,040
smelled like Bo like instantly.
And I, my performance was

358
00:18:36,040 --> 00:18:39,840
impeded because I felt like I
don't want to put this on

359
00:18:39,840 --> 00:18:41,480
anybody.
And she's like, raise your arms.

360
00:18:41,480 --> 00:18:45,760
I'm like, no, I'm like welding
my elbows to my ribs.

361
00:18:46,480 --> 00:18:49,400
I'm not moving cuz this is.
And I felt so bad.

362
00:18:50,000 --> 00:18:52,840
It was I could smell myself and
so I'm sure other people smell

363
00:18:52,840 --> 00:18:54,920
me.
Maybe, I don't know, I mean, you

364
00:18:54,920 --> 00:18:57,640
couldn't have been that smelly
after six hours.

365
00:18:57,640 --> 00:19:01,240
But you know, I wish more people
had your sense of shame, Claire.

366
00:19:01,360 --> 00:19:05,120
Yeah, I was ashamed and I I
scurried out of there like they

367
00:19:05,120 --> 00:19:06,800
probably thought I was a
complete weirdo because I

368
00:19:06,800 --> 00:19:10,480
scurried out and like, and I
like extra scrubbed my armpits

369
00:19:10,480 --> 00:19:12,600
and threw that deodorant away
because I was like that.

370
00:19:12,600 --> 00:19:14,440
That's not working.
Oof, Yeah.

371
00:19:14,560 --> 00:19:16,200
Wasn't good.
We won't name and shame the

372
00:19:16,200 --> 00:19:18,280
brand, but I'll I'll tell you
later.

373
00:19:18,520 --> 00:19:20,960
I mean, I'm not sure I've ever
come across a natural deodorant

374
00:19:20,960 --> 00:19:23,560
that works, but you know, that's
a topic for a different time,

375
00:19:23,560 --> 00:19:25,080
that is.
Very, very fair.

376
00:19:25,200 --> 00:19:28,120
But yeah.
All right, well, I want to come

377
00:19:28,120 --> 00:19:31,160
back to this and just say
something really quickly about

378
00:19:31,160 --> 00:19:33,040
evolution because it's
mentioning evolution.

379
00:19:33,040 --> 00:19:36,240
It's saying why would evolution
like make a smelly, basically?

380
00:19:36,720 --> 00:19:40,560
So for listeners that don't
remember their biology class,

381
00:19:40,880 --> 00:19:43,320
I'm going to remind you what
evolution actually is.

382
00:19:43,720 --> 00:19:46,920
So evolution just says that the
traits that give an advantage in

383
00:19:46,920 --> 00:19:49,800
terms of reproductive success
are going to increase over time,

384
00:19:50,200 --> 00:19:52,760
and traits that confer A
disadvantage will become less

385
00:19:52,760 --> 00:19:55,400
frequent and possibly disappear.
And that's really it.

386
00:19:55,400 --> 00:19:58,800
So evolution doesn't care how
you smell now.

387
00:19:58,800 --> 00:20:01,440
I mean, you might think, OK, if
you smell bad like we're talking

388
00:20:01,440 --> 00:20:03,400
about, you might not be able to
attract a mate.

389
00:20:03,520 --> 00:20:05,640
That is probably true in today's
society.

390
00:20:06,360 --> 00:20:09,080
And that will decrease your
reproductive success, right?

391
00:20:09,080 --> 00:20:11,480
If nobody can stand.
Yeah, like your Bo smell,

392
00:20:11,480 --> 00:20:14,000
they're probably not sticking
around long enough to have

393
00:20:14,000 --> 00:20:15,840
babies.
Although, I don't know, I look

394
00:20:15,840 --> 00:20:18,240
around our country today, and I
guess you'd be surprised.

395
00:20:18,400 --> 00:20:21,480
This is true.
But The thing is, like back when

396
00:20:21,480 --> 00:20:23,680
and where we evolved, if
everyone smells the same,

397
00:20:23,680 --> 00:20:25,560
there's nothing for evolution to
work on.

398
00:20:25,960 --> 00:20:29,360
So kind of referring to
evolution here is fallacious.

399
00:20:30,560 --> 00:20:33,320
But here's another question.
If soap isn't natural, what

400
00:20:33,320 --> 00:20:36,000
about toothpaste?
Do these men brush their teeth?

401
00:20:37,000 --> 00:20:39,720
I've definitely come across ones
who do not.

402
00:20:39,760 --> 00:20:42,200
Oh my God, that's so gross.
It's so bad.

403
00:20:42,200 --> 00:20:46,760
Again, just the feeling in your
butt, like I feel like our body

404
00:20:46,760 --> 00:20:50,360
will tell us like, you know,
like your mice doesn't taste

405
00:20:50,360 --> 00:20:54,600
good.
You like yeah, I I need floss, I

406
00:20:54,600 --> 00:20:57,080
need brushing and I need rinse.
Yes.

407
00:20:57,080 --> 00:21:02,480
Like it's a three-step process
twice a day, maybe 3 or 4.

408
00:21:02,480 --> 00:21:05,960
Like you know, sometimes you
might eat something or I don't

409
00:21:05,960 --> 00:21:09,240
know, if I go workout early, I
brush my teeth before I go and

410
00:21:09,240 --> 00:21:11,880
then I'll sharp and just
automatically brush them again.

411
00:21:12,000 --> 00:21:14,840
Definitely, even though you
haven't eaten or but it's just

412
00:21:15,120 --> 00:21:16,640
habit.
Yeah, I'm the same.

413
00:21:16,640 --> 00:21:19,520
I definitely brush at least
three times a day, but floss

414
00:21:19,520 --> 00:21:21,640
just once.
Oh yeah, because you don't want

415
00:21:21,640 --> 00:21:22,720
to.
You don't want to hurt your WE

416
00:21:22,720 --> 00:21:24,120
gun, right?
You don't want to.

417
00:21:24,120 --> 00:21:27,280
You don't want to have bleeding
gums on top of it all, but I

418
00:21:27,280 --> 00:21:29,280
don't know if you ever come
across a dude that didn't brush

419
00:21:29,280 --> 00:21:29,720
his.
Teeth.

420
00:21:29,720 --> 00:21:31,800
Oh, definitely.
Oh my God, it's so gross.

421
00:21:32,080 --> 00:21:35,080
Oh my God, I can't.
OK, so here's a follow up

422
00:21:35,080 --> 00:21:38,120
question though.
Did you like, was it like a

423
00:21:38,120 --> 00:21:40,840
first date thing where you were
like, oh clearly dude doesn't

424
00:21:40,840 --> 00:21:45,920
brush his teeth or, or did you
start getting all cozy and nasty

425
00:21:45,920 --> 00:21:49,280
with a guy and then all of a
sudden you're like, why aren't

426
00:21:49,280 --> 00:21:51,000
you brushing your teeth anymore?
Like.

427
00:21:51,280 --> 00:21:53,160
Oh Oh no, I've never had that
one happen.

428
00:21:53,160 --> 00:21:57,240
No, this would be more of a
first date situation and like

429
00:21:57,560 --> 00:21:59,440
they show up with things in
their teeth already.

430
00:22:00,440 --> 00:22:04,400
I mean, come on now.
Dude do a check.

431
00:22:04,480 --> 00:22:07,120
Do you like every time I get out
of the car I feel like I do a

432
00:22:07,120 --> 00:22:09,640
teeth and a nose check?
Who doesn't brush their teeth

433
00:22:09,640 --> 00:22:13,240
before a first date?
It's kind of urgent, you know, I

434
00:22:13,240 --> 00:22:15,760
did have a first date.
It was this year.

435
00:22:15,920 --> 00:22:20,040
It was this year and a man came
to the date and he had a black

436
00:22:20,040 --> 00:22:22,280
bean on his tooth.
A black bean.

437
00:22:22,280 --> 00:22:24,280
Oh God.
Oh, that's so gross.

438
00:22:24,400 --> 00:22:28,560
And I just, I was like looking
at his mouth and I was like,

439
00:22:29,160 --> 00:22:31,440
should I say something?
But like, I would say something

440
00:22:31,440 --> 00:22:32,520
to you.
I'd be like, girl, you gotta.

441
00:22:32,520 --> 00:22:35,560
But I don't think you'd ever
have like a full fucking black

442
00:22:35,560 --> 00:22:38,120
bean in your teeth.
I mean, if I do, please tell me.

443
00:22:38,200 --> 00:22:40,360
Yeah, I think cuz you would feel
it.

444
00:22:40,360 --> 00:22:43,560
Surely you would feel it, yes.
I mean, obviously it wasn't like

445
00:22:43,560 --> 00:22:45,720
a whole bean.
It was a squished bean and.

446
00:22:45,960 --> 00:22:48,880
Like the skin of it.
The skin of the bean, but like

447
00:22:48,880 --> 00:22:50,360
there was some bean in there
too.

448
00:22:50,360 --> 00:22:54,520
But yeah, I was just like and I
couldn't stop looking at it, but

449
00:22:54,520 --> 00:22:57,120
I didn't say anything.
It was the first date and it

450
00:22:57,120 --> 00:22:58,880
just went away eventually.
But it's.

451
00:22:59,040 --> 00:23:01,520
So awkward.
Did you make an excuse and leave

452
00:23:01,520 --> 00:23:03,240
early?
And we didn't have a second

453
00:23:03,240 --> 00:23:04,920
date.
Yeah, I would imagine.

454
00:23:05,040 --> 00:23:08,960
Yeah, because if there's a bean
in the tooth, what is elsewhere,

455
00:23:09,000 --> 00:23:12,960
I mean.
Oh, well, I don't even want to

456
00:23:12,960 --> 00:23:15,120
imagine, but we don't think
we're going to get to that.

457
00:23:15,920 --> 00:23:17,120
We might.
Yes.

458
00:23:17,840 --> 00:23:21,040
Yes.
Foreshadowing traumatic irony in

459
00:23:21,040 --> 00:23:23,040
the podcast.
Absolutely.

460
00:23:23,840 --> 00:23:25,960
So here's a question.
Do we think that women are doing

461
00:23:25,960 --> 00:23:27,480
this too?
I mean, this really feels like a

462
00:23:27,480 --> 00:23:31,640
man thing to me.
Yeah, I mean, I hug my friends.

463
00:23:31,640 --> 00:23:35,840
I'm a hugger and I have never, I
don't think ever.

464
00:23:35,840 --> 00:23:38,720
I mean, I'm I'm sure they're
stinky ladies like there too,

465
00:23:38,720 --> 00:23:40,000
like.
The gravy.

466
00:23:40,120 --> 00:23:46,200
Yeah, it's yeah, but I don't
yeah, I haven't ever smelt a

467
00:23:46,200 --> 00:23:49,760
friend and been like oh, you're
stinky and like I I've worked

468
00:23:49,760 --> 00:23:52,520
out with you, I've worked out
with friends and even then I'm

469
00:23:52,840 --> 00:23:54,600
you're not ever smelly.
Well.

470
00:23:54,680 --> 00:23:57,520
Yeah, fresh smell it.
I can't talk fresh.

471
00:23:57,880 --> 00:24:00,320
Fresh sweat is fine.
I don't mind that.

472
00:24:00,400 --> 00:24:03,120
No hug my sweaty friends,
because you're not stinky.

473
00:24:03,400 --> 00:24:04,920
Like there's a difference.
Absolutely.

474
00:24:05,040 --> 00:24:09,960
There's definitely a difference
as one that sweats often when I

475
00:24:10,320 --> 00:24:13,440
that sounds gross when I like.
I just mean teaching yoga.

476
00:24:13,440 --> 00:24:15,520
Like it.
I split often too, it's fine.

477
00:24:15,560 --> 00:24:19,560
Yeah, we're sweat, sweaty girls,
but well, we exercise, we do

478
00:24:19,560 --> 00:24:22,960
take care of our bodies and we
sweat and we sweat and we wash

479
00:24:22,960 --> 00:24:25,400
it off.
Yes, frequently.

480
00:24:25,840 --> 00:24:28,000
But you know, there's also
another dimension.

481
00:24:28,080 --> 00:24:31,520
We could, we could just go.
It's it's washing your clothes.

482
00:24:31,640 --> 00:24:34,480
Well, that too too.
Like you can't if you wash your

483
00:24:34,480 --> 00:24:36,760
body and you have wash your
jeans in three months, like

484
00:24:36,760 --> 00:24:39,120
that's going to be a problem.
That's just nasty.

485
00:24:39,120 --> 00:24:40,680
It's just going to be a problem
I put.

486
00:24:40,680 --> 00:24:42,280
Bleach in the laundry every
time.

487
00:24:42,280 --> 00:24:44,200
Yeah, it's like, get rid of
those germs.

488
00:24:44,200 --> 00:24:47,400
Yeah, definitely.
EW, EW.

489
00:24:48,120 --> 00:24:51,040
Brush your teeth.
Public service announcement.

490
00:24:51,480 --> 00:24:54,520
Please, for the love of God,
brush your teeth.

491
00:24:54,520 --> 00:24:55,960
Especially before I first see
it.

492
00:24:56,360 --> 00:24:59,200
My God.
OK, so anecdotally, I'm sorry.

493
00:24:59,240 --> 00:25:02,040
I know it's such a weird thing
to not do.

494
00:25:03,400 --> 00:25:05,040
Yeah.
All right.

495
00:25:05,040 --> 00:25:07,840
So we think this is more of a
man thing, at least anecdotally.

496
00:25:07,840 --> 00:25:10,920
That's what we feel.
I mean, I'm not trying to be

497
00:25:10,920 --> 00:25:15,680
mean, but the experience has
been, yes, yeah.

498
00:25:16,720 --> 00:25:18,840
Now, you looked up some
statistics on this, right?

499
00:25:19,400 --> 00:25:22,240
Oh yes, I did.
So we have data, we've done the

500
00:25:22,240 --> 00:25:24,640
anecdotes, now we have the data
points.

501
00:25:24,640 --> 00:25:31,440
So this is a fun result from
2025 S again current current

502
00:25:31,440 --> 00:25:36,920
which is disturbing. 85% of
women report washing their hands

503
00:25:36,920 --> 00:25:42,360
after using a public restroom,
but only 77% of men do the same.

504
00:25:42,640 --> 00:25:45,720
Now when I saw this data point I
was like well that's not like a

505
00:25:45,720 --> 00:25:49,520
huge gap, it's totally fine.
But then you remember it's self

506
00:25:49,520 --> 00:25:51,000
reporting.
Right.

507
00:25:51,160 --> 00:25:54,680
So if I'm like Melissa, did you
wash her hands?

508
00:25:55,320 --> 00:25:58,600
Of course, yes, every time say
no, right.

509
00:25:58,600 --> 00:26:02,880
So you know then that is that
that the margin of error in

510
00:26:02,880 --> 00:26:05,040
those in that little data set,
right?

511
00:26:05,120 --> 00:26:08,360
Oh, we've got to be careful with
self reporting in a future

512
00:26:08,360 --> 00:26:10,520
episode.
Remind me of this later.

513
00:26:10,520 --> 00:26:14,400
We need to talk about penis size
and self reporting and how sort

514
00:26:14,400 --> 00:26:17,440
of the averages were calculated
because it was self reporting.

515
00:26:17,800 --> 00:26:21,040
I would imagine there were
several inches different some.

516
00:26:21,040 --> 00:26:23,000
Rounding up might have occurred.
Oh, my God.

517
00:26:23,240 --> 00:26:25,360
Yeah, a lot.
A lot.

518
00:26:26,120 --> 00:26:29,200
Oh my God.
Well, it turns out that if you

519
00:26:29,200 --> 00:26:33,040
watch people so, like, set up a
camera, not in a creepy way, but

520
00:26:33,040 --> 00:26:37,440
like in a restroom, just to, you
know, get some data points that

521
00:26:37,480 --> 00:26:40,400
you see that actually these
figures are not probably

522
00:26:40,400 --> 00:26:42,480
accurate when they're not self
reported.

523
00:26:42,480 --> 00:26:47,120
So a we study from 2020 at
Michigan State and we should

524
00:26:47,120 --> 00:26:49,200
have all been washing our hands
in 2020.

525
00:26:49,200 --> 00:26:50,880
Let's.
Be 100%.

526
00:26:50,920 --> 00:26:54,160
Yep, that's yeah.
When all we got into COVID and

527
00:26:54,160 --> 00:26:56,000
people were like, you have to
wash your hands and I'm like,

528
00:26:56,000 --> 00:26:58,440
wait, what?
People weren't doing this before

529
00:26:58,560 --> 00:27:00,120
you.
Weren't washing your hands

530
00:27:00,120 --> 00:27:02,160
before?
We need tutorials.

531
00:27:02,160 --> 00:27:03,640
We have to sing the alphabet.
Oh.

532
00:27:03,640 --> 00:27:05,920
Dear.
Yeah, that was kind of a little,

533
00:27:06,080 --> 00:27:10,240
a little wake up moment.
But this little study from

534
00:27:10,240 --> 00:27:15,120
Michigan State M find that men
were twice as likely to skip

535
00:27:15,120 --> 00:27:19,560
washing their hands than women.
And then across the pond in the

536
00:27:19,560 --> 00:27:26,200
UK, they looked at 200,000
public restroom visits and they

537
00:27:26,200 --> 00:27:30,840
find that 31% of men actually
wash their hands with soap

538
00:27:31,360 --> 00:27:34,400
compared to 65% of women.
So like that's double.

539
00:27:34,520 --> 00:27:37,120
Oh my God.
Yeah, only 31%.

540
00:27:37,440 --> 00:27:40,520
Yeah.
So less than 1/3 of men in the

541
00:27:40,520 --> 00:27:44,200
UK, Yep, are washing their hands
with soap in a public restroom.

542
00:27:44,200 --> 00:27:46,280
A public restroom, which is
gross to begin with.

543
00:27:46,280 --> 00:27:47,880
That's not even your house.
No.

544
00:27:48,320 --> 00:27:50,160
Oh yes.
Nasty.

545
00:27:50,160 --> 00:27:56,840
Well, I mean, OK, to be fair,
you know, it is the UK and I, I

546
00:27:58,400 --> 00:28:02,040
I haven't spent that much time
in the United Kingdom, but I

547
00:28:02,080 --> 00:28:04,680
will say it's the only country
I've ever visited where I saw a

548
00:28:04,680 --> 00:28:07,040
man urinating in the lobby of a
hotel.

549
00:28:07,280 --> 00:28:08,280
Oh, cool.
Yeah.

550
00:28:08,280 --> 00:28:09,800
Good times.
That's amazing.

551
00:28:09,800 --> 00:28:13,320
I mean, we definitely pee in the
street there.

552
00:28:13,520 --> 00:28:17,560
That makes us like animals.
I mean, I say the UK, I'm from

553
00:28:17,600 --> 00:28:18,800
Ireland.
Sorry.

554
00:28:18,800 --> 00:28:23,000
Pardon me, I am from Ireland and
we're colonized so we're kind of

555
00:28:23,000 --> 00:28:26,120
forced to be part of the UK, but
that's again, another topic

556
00:28:26,120 --> 00:28:29,720
altogether.
But there is a, there is a pee

557
00:28:29,720 --> 00:28:33,160
in the street mentality, but
that's that's another topic.

558
00:28:33,160 --> 00:28:36,200
Sometimes you have to, I mean.
The street is one thing though.

559
00:28:36,200 --> 00:28:38,480
I mean, if you're it's, it's a
little gross to me, but if

560
00:28:38,480 --> 00:28:40,560
you're peeing in the gutter and
it's washing down the drain,

561
00:28:40,560 --> 00:28:43,600
that's one thing.
But if you are urinating in the

562
00:28:43,600 --> 00:28:46,440
carpeted lobby of a hotel.
Why?

563
00:28:47,080 --> 00:28:50,240
I mean, I can only imagine
because they were drunk off

564
00:28:50,240 --> 00:28:54,400
their ass, but wow.
It was also 7:00 in the morning,

565
00:28:54,400 --> 00:28:56,600
so I guess that was a holdover
from last night.

566
00:28:57,320 --> 00:28:59,880
So many stories in that
particular incident.

567
00:28:59,920 --> 00:29:02,960
Wow.
Or, you know, well, I guess they

568
00:29:02,960 --> 00:29:05,360
were watching the visit size.
Like maybe they're just more

569
00:29:05,360 --> 00:29:07,440
honest.
Oh, right.

570
00:29:07,440 --> 00:29:09,120
But if they had the cameras out,
that's true.

571
00:29:09,160 --> 00:29:10,920
Yeah.
Wow.

572
00:29:10,920 --> 00:29:13,360
So what's going on here?
Why are men grosser than women?

573
00:29:14,040 --> 00:29:19,040
Oh my goodness, I, I don't know.
I mean, God, we could go all

574
00:29:19,040 --> 00:29:20,960
deep and professorial on this,
right?

575
00:29:20,960 --> 00:29:26,800
And look at, you know, gender
overtime and gender roles, and

576
00:29:26,800 --> 00:29:31,840
you know how there may be some
degree of entitlement.

577
00:29:31,840 --> 00:29:34,120
There just a little, do you
think?

578
00:29:34,120 --> 00:29:39,800
Just a wee bit, but yeah, I
don't, I mean, it's maybe not

579
00:29:39,800 --> 00:29:42,560
that conscious, right?
Like I don't have to because I'm

580
00:29:42,560 --> 00:29:45,080
amazing.
But maybe it does actually go

581
00:29:45,080 --> 00:29:49,640
back to something to do with,
you know, women always feeling

582
00:29:49,640 --> 00:29:52,160
like they have to people please
or live up to a certain

583
00:29:52,160 --> 00:29:55,080
expectation.
Like I would say that that's

584
00:29:55,080 --> 00:29:59,600
most definitely part of it.
I I feel like practically every

585
00:29:59,600 --> 00:30:03,480
woman I know, or maybe I'm just
a weirdo, but no, like, I I know

586
00:30:03,480 --> 00:30:07,040
other people.
Even if you go in and D it, I

587
00:30:07,040 --> 00:30:09,680
feel like and you're like, it's
the first day, it's just coffee.

588
00:30:09,680 --> 00:30:11,600
No action is going to happen
here.

589
00:30:11,960 --> 00:30:17,840
It's still like a full shave and
fragrance and teeth and like.

590
00:30:18,360 --> 00:30:21,400
Oh yeah, 100% Manny Petty,
right?

591
00:30:21,400 --> 00:30:22,840
Maybe a facial.
I don't know.

592
00:30:22,880 --> 00:30:25,280
It's just like some some
grooming, some serious grooming,

593
00:30:25,280 --> 00:30:27,040
some serious.
Grooming and even when you're

594
00:30:27,040 --> 00:30:31,160
like, no, no action is happening
like this is literally a coffee

595
00:30:31,160 --> 00:30:34,520
diet.
You're just like I will show up

596
00:30:34,600 --> 00:30:38,480
well presented and groomed.
100%, yeah, even down there,

597
00:30:38,480 --> 00:30:40,520
right.
Yes, yes.

598
00:30:40,520 --> 00:30:42,520
I mean, there's something about
the way it makes you feel,

599
00:30:42,920 --> 00:30:43,400
right?
Right.

600
00:30:43,400 --> 00:30:45,600
It's a confidence thing, maybe.
You feel better.

601
00:30:45,640 --> 00:30:49,880
And again, I just think that
that goes back, back to the way

602
00:30:49,880 --> 00:30:52,200
women have been treated over
centuries, where we always have

603
00:30:52,200 --> 00:30:55,920
to try harder, try harder.
And the dude's like, I just

604
00:30:55,920 --> 00:30:59,840
exist here.
I am, want me, Want me.

605
00:31:00,200 --> 00:31:05,520
And yeah, so like lack of
effort, historical programming,

606
00:31:06,080 --> 00:31:08,760
all the things mixed.
Together outsourcing of

607
00:31:08,760 --> 00:31:12,040
cleanliness and hygiene to their
female partners if they have

608
00:31:12,040 --> 00:31:13,960
one.
Well, cuz if you're dating

609
00:31:13,960 --> 00:31:17,080
right, there's nobody saying,
dude, you got a black bean in

610
00:31:17,080 --> 00:31:20,040
your tooth.
You know where as yeah, I mean

611
00:31:20,920 --> 00:31:23,760
when I was when I was married, I
bought the clothes, I bought

612
00:31:23,760 --> 00:31:27,400
the, the shower gel, the wash
mittens.

613
00:31:27,400 --> 00:31:29,840
I don't know if they were used.
I would suspect not actually,

614
00:31:29,840 --> 00:31:33,360
but you know, just.
All the things.

615
00:31:33,360 --> 00:31:36,000
Yeah, all the things.
So maybe we do have like a

616
00:31:36,000 --> 00:31:39,400
historical gender gap in
cleanliness.

617
00:31:39,400 --> 00:31:40,640
Yeah.
Yeah, I think you're right.

618
00:31:40,640 --> 00:31:42,760
Because it happens in all the
other things so.

619
00:31:43,120 --> 00:31:45,760
And that kind of relates to one
more thing I wanted to mention,

620
00:31:45,760 --> 00:31:50,320
which is this thing, it kind of
screams, quote, alpha male to

621
00:31:50,320 --> 00:31:52,080
me.
And I don't use that in a

622
00:31:52,080 --> 00:31:54,040
complimentary sense.
No, Right.

623
00:31:54,440 --> 00:31:58,240
So maybe this Doctor Hamblin is
coming at this from like a place

624
00:31:58,240 --> 00:32:02,120
of scientific inquiry or
motivation or whatever.

625
00:32:02,120 --> 00:32:05,920
Like I'm not getting like alpha
vibes from his right social

626
00:32:05,920 --> 00:32:07,120
media.
And he did.

627
00:32:07,120 --> 00:32:10,080
He was a science writer for the
Atlantic which is pretty

628
00:32:10,080 --> 00:32:13,360
respectable I would say.
But I feel like I have seen a

629
00:32:13,360 --> 00:32:17,640
bunch of tik Toks from so-called
self-described alpha males

630
00:32:17,920 --> 00:32:20,800
explaining how some things are
just masculine and women

631
00:32:20,800 --> 00:32:23,640
shouldn't complain.
The really famous one I can

632
00:32:23,640 --> 00:32:26,960
think of recently is the guy who
went to social media with that

633
00:32:26,960 --> 00:32:29,000
video about skid marks.
Did you see?

634
00:32:29,000 --> 00:32:31,800
That Jesus, no.
Oh my goodness.

635
00:32:32,080 --> 00:32:37,760
So he said real men have skid
marks because they fart a lot

636
00:32:37,920 --> 00:32:40,040
and have jobs that make them
sweat.

637
00:32:40,520 --> 00:32:43,960
And then he told men to be proud
of their skid marks because they

638
00:32:43,960 --> 00:32:48,880
worked hard for them.
Oh my God, Can you believe?

639
00:32:49,360 --> 00:32:57,800
Well, sadly yes, but also I, I
mean, how graphic do we want to

640
00:32:57,800 --> 00:32:59,720
get here, Melissa?
You know what?

641
00:32:59,720 --> 00:33:04,040
Go wild, Claire.
I just like I don't create skid

642
00:33:04,040 --> 00:33:06,440
marks when I fart.
Nor do I.

643
00:33:06,440 --> 00:33:09,000
That is shitting your pants.
That is shitting your pants.

644
00:33:09,000 --> 00:33:10,640
That's not farting.
That's like.

645
00:33:10,640 --> 00:33:11,360
That's.
Sharding.

646
00:33:11,360 --> 00:33:13,120
That's sharding.
And you know what?

647
00:33:13,400 --> 00:33:17,360
We've all had moments in our
lives where bad things happen

648
00:33:17,480 --> 00:33:20,600
when we're sick.
I mean, who has not sharted in

649
00:33:20,600 --> 00:33:24,360
their pants at least once?
But if this is a regular

650
00:33:24,560 --> 00:33:27,320
everyday occurrence, see, I'm
going to suggest that

651
00:33:27,320 --> 00:33:30,560
something's wrong.
There there is there is a

652
00:33:30,560 --> 00:33:34,800
problem and and I do have some
personal experience.

653
00:33:35,040 --> 00:33:37,480
Please tell us.
I'm afraid to ask, but please

654
00:33:37,480 --> 00:33:39,080
tell.
Us Oh my God, I can feel like

655
00:33:39,080 --> 00:33:44,600
the saliva coming into my mouth
like where the like Oh my God,

656
00:33:44,760 --> 00:33:46,920
like I can't believe I'm sharing
this story.

657
00:33:47,320 --> 00:33:50,800
I have shame, which is really
interesting right again, as

658
00:33:50,800 --> 00:33:52,440
women that we take on these
things.

659
00:33:52,720 --> 00:33:55,920
I have shame because I was with
a man who shit his pants on the

660
00:33:55,920 --> 00:33:58,720
rag.
I'm like, why am I feeling she

661
00:33:58,720 --> 00:34:00,760
am about that?
But you know.

662
00:34:01,640 --> 00:34:04,080
I'm guessing he probably didn't
feel a lot of shame about it.

663
00:34:04,560 --> 00:34:07,920
He did not and in fact, again,
depending on high graphic like

664
00:34:07,920 --> 00:34:14,440
we want to go I this this man
that we actually Co cohabitated,

665
00:34:14,440 --> 00:34:19,280
cohabited, cohabitated, lived in
the same place for a moment and

666
00:34:20,880 --> 00:34:25,800
he did not like to wear
underwear, which is you know, I

667
00:34:25,840 --> 00:34:27,560
get.
Sometimes sure, go commando,

668
00:34:27,560 --> 00:34:29,639
right?
Like in summer if I'm in a dress

669
00:34:29,760 --> 00:34:31,040
like.
Maybe not same.

670
00:34:31,120 --> 00:34:33,760
Totally fine, right?
It's it's like a one and done

671
00:34:33,760 --> 00:34:36,880
situation, right?
But so.

672
00:34:37,000 --> 00:34:38,560
Oh my God.
Yeah.

673
00:34:38,560 --> 00:34:42,239
So his pants did not look good
on the interior.

674
00:34:42,239 --> 00:34:43,719
God.
So the skid marks were not in

675
00:34:43,719 --> 00:34:45,320
the underwear, they were in a
they were.

676
00:34:45,440 --> 00:34:49,600
Pants in the actual fucking.
There was no barrier.

677
00:34:49,920 --> 00:34:51,120
There was no.
Barrier.

678
00:34:51,120 --> 00:34:52,960
The pants were holding the
sharks back.

679
00:34:53,000 --> 00:34:55,400
From the world, From the general
public?

680
00:34:55,400 --> 00:34:58,520
Oh no.
But sometimes they didn't.

681
00:35:02,240 --> 00:35:07,480
Oh my God, oh sweet Jesus.
Oh, now I'm now I'm throwing up

682
00:35:07,480 --> 00:35:09,640
again in my mouth.
It's it's really bad.

683
00:35:09,640 --> 00:35:12,600
And they would, you know,
because sometimes you're tired

684
00:35:12,600 --> 00:35:14,560
and you just step out of your
pants, right.

685
00:35:14,560 --> 00:35:16,880
Like I I've definitely woken up
to little like.

686
00:35:17,160 --> 00:35:18,720
Pilots of pants on the ground,
yes.

687
00:35:18,720 --> 00:35:20,920
Because you're tired, but like
obviously you clean it up right

688
00:35:20,920 --> 00:35:25,040
away, but they would step out.
But then that meant the skid

689
00:35:25,040 --> 00:35:28,120
marks were in full view.
And I don't know.

690
00:35:28,200 --> 00:35:30,360
I don't know if I should share
the story.

691
00:35:30,400 --> 00:35:31,920
Share it.
Oh God.

692
00:35:32,320 --> 00:35:35,680
Well, in the spirit of my James
Joyce presentation this week and

693
00:35:35,680 --> 00:35:38,680
just describing all of the
things in great detail.

694
00:35:38,680 --> 00:35:41,360
Corking assholes and.
Stuff like I wish he had corked

695
00:35:41,360 --> 00:35:45,000
his asshole.
If he had corked his asshole, we

696
00:35:45,000 --> 00:35:46,840
would not.
I would not be sharing this

697
00:35:46,840 --> 00:35:50,080
story right now.
So I don't know.

698
00:35:50,120 --> 00:35:54,000
The bigger question in the story
is why did I do this?

699
00:35:54,000 --> 00:35:59,400
OK, because so bear in mind, I
would be confronted with these

700
00:35:59,760 --> 00:36:02,520
shitty pants when?
I would wake up.

701
00:36:02,520 --> 00:36:07,200
Did you do his laundry?
Well, again, ashamed to admit

702
00:36:07,200 --> 00:36:09,800
that I I mostly did his laundry
anyway.

703
00:36:10,240 --> 00:36:13,960
But this one particular day
there was a scene of horror.

704
00:36:14,120 --> 00:36:20,800
It was it was really bad.
Melissa and I again, instead of

705
00:36:20,800 --> 00:36:25,600
going good God, you like dirty
bastard, take care of your shit.

706
00:36:25,920 --> 00:36:31,160
Like literal shit.
Yeah, I was in the shower and I

707
00:36:31,160 --> 00:36:33,800
thought, I can't put that in the
washing machine.

708
00:36:33,800 --> 00:36:37,600
It will literally like break the
Oh, no, I did.

709
00:36:37,720 --> 00:36:39,840
I did.
You brought the shitty pants.

710
00:36:39,840 --> 00:36:42,880
Into the shower with you.
And but get this, here's The

711
00:36:42,880 --> 00:36:46,480
funny thing.
So I like was just I was trying

712
00:36:46,480 --> 00:36:52,600
to get the chunks gone.
Oh God, why did I do this for a

713
00:36:52,600 --> 00:36:57,080
grown ass man?
This is why I've shame.

714
00:36:57,240 --> 00:37:00,000
Oh This is why I've shame.
Oh God.

715
00:37:00,120 --> 00:37:02,560
And so of course then I get out
of the shark.

716
00:37:02,560 --> 00:37:07,040
I bleach the whole shark, like,
scrub the shark, steam clean.

717
00:37:07,040 --> 00:37:10,720
I steam clean everything but yet
I lay with this man.

718
00:37:11,240 --> 00:37:14,040
That's my point.
Like how did I lay with this

719
00:37:14,040 --> 00:37:17,000
man?
Right, so he took off the shitty

720
00:37:17,000 --> 00:37:19,240
pants, right?
And let's be clear, if there's

721
00:37:19,240 --> 00:37:21,480
chunks, this is beyond a skid
mark now.

722
00:37:21,600 --> 00:37:24,640
Or a shart or a shart.
Yeah, we've gone full into

723
00:37:24,640 --> 00:37:28,240
shitting your pants territory.
Not wiping.

724
00:37:29,040 --> 00:37:32,480
I think it's got more to do.
With not wiping so gross.

725
00:37:32,520 --> 00:37:34,640
So which is worse?
He would drop the pants.

726
00:37:34,840 --> 00:37:37,200
Drop the pants.
And then come directly to bed.

727
00:37:38,400 --> 00:37:40,600
Thankfully, mostly wore jammy
bottoms.

728
00:37:40,600 --> 00:37:43,640
For the love of God, but I did.
But I did find.

729
00:37:43,840 --> 00:37:45,960
Have you ever had that?
I did find chipmarks on the

730
00:37:45,960 --> 00:37:48,800
sheets.
Gross.

731
00:37:49,240 --> 00:37:52,600
Yeah.
So he didn't shower or wash his

732
00:37:52,600 --> 00:37:54,840
nasty ass before crawling into
bed with you?

733
00:37:55,000 --> 00:37:58,640
No, Nope, Nope, Nope.
Nope, Nope, Nope.

734
00:37:59,080 --> 00:38:03,520
And this all came to a
crescendo, shall we say?

735
00:38:04,560 --> 00:38:07,000
I don't like that word in this
context.

736
00:38:07,040 --> 00:38:09,160
I don't know what, there
probably are other words.

737
00:38:09,480 --> 00:38:13,680
So we went to a BBQ at my
friend's house one night and he

738
00:38:13,680 --> 00:38:16,360
was wearing.
It was summer, so he was wearing

739
00:38:16,400 --> 00:38:18,680
light pants.
Oh no.

740
00:38:18,800 --> 00:38:21,800
You know what's going on?
He was wearing light pants and

741
00:38:21,800 --> 00:38:23,600
he was standing in front of me
getting food.

742
00:38:23,600 --> 00:38:26,320
And I was just like, Oh dear
God.

743
00:38:26,640 --> 00:38:30,480
I can see his.
Tattoo penetrated the the

744
00:38:30,480 --> 00:38:34,480
outside of the pants.
That's where the cork would have

745
00:38:34,480 --> 00:38:36,000
come in hand.
That's where the cork would have

746
00:38:36,000 --> 00:38:39,560
been great that day.
But you know, and again, I was

747
00:38:39,560 --> 00:38:41,360
like, Oh my God, I feel so
guilty.

748
00:38:41,360 --> 00:38:43,440
I have to tell him that's so
embarrassing.

749
00:38:43,840 --> 00:38:47,680
And I was like, babe, there's
like a thing on the back of your

750
00:38:47,680 --> 00:38:49,880
pet, like could you take your
sweater off or something?

751
00:38:49,880 --> 00:38:51,360
And he's like, what are you,
what are you talking about?

752
00:38:51,360 --> 00:38:53,200
And I was like, well, there's
like a mark.

753
00:38:53,200 --> 00:38:55,920
I was trying to be so kind of.
Course as you are.

754
00:38:56,080 --> 00:38:58,520
It was my friends, it was my
people.

755
00:38:58,840 --> 00:39:01,480
And then it clicked with him
what it was.

756
00:39:01,680 --> 00:39:06,960
He didn't care.
He did not care.

757
00:39:07,760 --> 00:39:11,680
Wow, just wearing a shitty ass
pants just for everyone to see

758
00:39:11,680 --> 00:39:14,520
at a social event.
Yep, Yep, Yep.

759
00:39:14,560 --> 00:39:17,160
Wow.
So yeah, Wow.

760
00:39:17,480 --> 00:39:19,480
Yeah.
So there you go.

761
00:39:19,520 --> 00:39:22,040
That's my little shit.
Your pants story.

762
00:39:22,120 --> 00:39:25,320
I mean, that's a low point.
That that was a low point for so

763
00:39:25,320 --> 00:39:28,920
many reasons, but it's it's like
a, it's like a visual

764
00:39:28,920 --> 00:39:32,480
representation of.
Exactly what we're talking about

765
00:39:32,480 --> 00:39:36,800
here.
Wow, so no shame for wearing

766
00:39:36,800 --> 00:39:40,040
shitty pants.
And I'd imagine, you know, based

767
00:39:40,040 --> 00:39:45,280
on that and the TikTok or real
whatever I shared with you, that

768
00:39:45,480 --> 00:39:47,840
some men just don't think this
is a big deal.

769
00:39:48,320 --> 00:39:49,880
They really don't.
And you know what?

770
00:39:50,040 --> 00:39:51,840
I don't think they're shitting
their pants.

771
00:39:51,840 --> 00:39:53,040
I think they're not wiping.
They're.

772
00:39:53,040 --> 00:39:55,000
Just not wiping their their
pants.

773
00:39:55,880 --> 00:39:57,760
Worse.
I mean, it is worse.

774
00:39:57,800 --> 00:40:00,640
It is worse because it just is
worse.

775
00:40:00,640 --> 00:40:04,080
Yeah, because there's lots of
tools available.

776
00:40:04,320 --> 00:40:07,960
Toilet paper.
Wow wipes I bought Oh my God I

777
00:40:07,960 --> 00:40:10,400
bought every wipe.
I even bought 1.

778
00:40:10,400 --> 00:40:11,520
Wipes.
Yes, by the dude.

779
00:40:11,520 --> 00:40:13,280
Wipes.
I bought the Dude Wipes and I

780
00:40:13,280 --> 00:40:15,960
bought, I actually bought one of
those little 2 sheet.

781
00:40:15,960 --> 00:40:19,280
Is that what they're called?
The little bit like bidet things

782
00:40:19,280 --> 00:40:21,960
you can add on absolutely
everything.

783
00:40:22,200 --> 00:40:24,320
You never used them.
Never used them.

784
00:40:25,560 --> 00:40:28,880
Gross, Super gross.
Thank God that period is over

785
00:40:29,360 --> 00:40:34,040
for so many reasons, but.
So many shitty pants for shitty

786
00:40:34,040 --> 00:40:38,560
pants.
Wow, goodness.

787
00:40:39,720 --> 00:40:42,760
Well, so sorry to everybody
who's like throwing up in their

788
00:40:42,760 --> 00:40:45,680
mouths right now, but maybe
maybe you can relate, can

789
00:40:45,680 --> 00:40:48,080
anybody?
Relate real talk, you know, drop

790
00:40:48,080 --> 00:40:50,960
us a line if you can.
If you've got a story that can

791
00:40:51,040 --> 00:40:53,000
top clear, we want to hear about
it.

792
00:40:53,240 --> 00:40:55,360
Absolutely.
We'll we'll talk about this on a

793
00:40:55,360 --> 00:40:58,200
future episode.
I hope for your sake no such

794
00:40:58,200 --> 00:41:00,960
stories exist, people out there
in the world.

795
00:41:00,960 --> 00:41:06,480
I hope so too, but I suspect
that they do and I'm worried.

796
00:41:06,480 --> 00:41:09,080
Why are men pushing for
disgusting behaviors like this

797
00:41:09,080 --> 00:41:11,360
to be normalized?
Why is this OK?

798
00:41:11,600 --> 00:41:16,640
My God, well, you know, I think
as you quoted yourself

799
00:41:16,640 --> 00:41:22,080
proclaimed alpha male in on
TikTok, it's it's kind of back

800
00:41:22,080 --> 00:41:24,200
to, well, boys will be boys,
right?

801
00:41:24,200 --> 00:41:29,080
It's like the same justification
we use for more egregious things

802
00:41:29,480 --> 00:41:31,440
like, well, what was she wearing
or what?

803
00:41:31,440 --> 00:41:35,440
You know, like, well, how many
times have you heard, well, boys

804
00:41:35,440 --> 00:41:37,680
will be boys?
Like who was that Olympian guy a

805
00:41:37,680 --> 00:41:39,640
few years ago?
Got into a big fight at the

806
00:41:39,640 --> 00:41:41,760
Olympics totally disgraced.
Everybody.

807
00:41:42,120 --> 00:41:45,760
And they were like, oh, locker
room or, you know, ridiculous.

808
00:41:45,920 --> 00:41:48,720
And I think it just comes back
to that.

809
00:41:48,720 --> 00:41:52,760
And I don't know, like maybe
it's like back to like caveman

810
00:41:52,760 --> 00:41:57,720
days or like tree cutter.
What are those people called?

811
00:41:57,720 --> 00:41:58,800
Lumberjack.
Thank you.

812
00:41:58,880 --> 00:42:00,680
I'm like, why can't I remember
that?

813
00:42:01,200 --> 00:42:04,000
Where there's this idea and
yeah, that's hot, right?

814
00:42:04,000 --> 00:42:07,120
Like who doesn't love a good
lumberjack shirt and an axe or

815
00:42:07,120 --> 00:42:10,080
something Do.
You think lumberjacks have skid

816
00:42:10,080 --> 00:42:13,680
marks?
I really hope they don't.

817
00:42:14,400 --> 00:42:15,760
No, it kind of ruins the fantasy
it.

818
00:42:15,800 --> 00:42:18,920
Really does ruin the fantasy
because I'm, I'm imagining

819
00:42:18,920 --> 00:42:20,640
something really good in my head
right now.

820
00:42:20,640 --> 00:42:26,520
But I, I think it comes back to
just excusing poor behavior, you

821
00:42:26,520 --> 00:42:30,520
know, and I'm saying it's
inherently because of my gender

822
00:42:30,520 --> 00:42:33,880
identification.
And I think that's just

823
00:42:33,880 --> 00:42:36,160
ridiculous.
And I don't think women would

824
00:42:36,160 --> 00:42:38,200
really get away with with doing
that.

825
00:42:38,880 --> 00:42:41,120
Oh definitely not.
I mean, Can you imagine if we

826
00:42:41,120 --> 00:42:43,360
stopped showering and said,
well, this is just like our

827
00:42:43,360 --> 00:42:46,840
feminine nature?
Yeah, or again, sorry, I'm

828
00:42:46,840 --> 00:42:50,400
clearly the graphic person,
Melissa is the very like here is

829
00:42:50,400 --> 00:42:54,160
some scientific data and I'm
like, shit your pants like.

830
00:42:54,560 --> 00:42:56,280
But oh, don't worry.
We're going to.

831
00:42:56,840 --> 00:42:58,880
You're like it will.
We're going to find the graphic

832
00:42:59,120 --> 00:43:02,640
side of me soon enough.
Yay, I look forward to that.

833
00:43:02,640 --> 00:43:07,080
But periods, Like look at
periods, we literally bleed from

834
00:43:07,080 --> 00:43:11,800
our vagina like once a month.
It's it's it's messy.

835
00:43:12,080 --> 00:43:13,600
It is messy.
It's messy.

836
00:43:13,880 --> 00:43:16,920
How many women in the world?
I mean, again, accidents happen,

837
00:43:17,240 --> 00:43:21,360
but like, you don't smell them,
you don't see it.

838
00:43:21,640 --> 00:43:23,440
And like I say, accidents
happen.

839
00:43:23,440 --> 00:43:25,880
Occasionally, but sure, yeah,
we're not walking around with

840
00:43:25,880 --> 00:43:30,440
bloody pants on, right?
So could we just all walk around

841
00:43:30,440 --> 00:43:33,120
and free bleed and be like,
well, it's just my my

842
00:43:33,320 --> 00:43:35,920
femininity.
It's just my femininity.

843
00:43:36,080 --> 00:43:38,520
Are you so offended?
Yeah, like that woman that ran

844
00:43:38,520 --> 00:43:43,200
the London Marathon some years
back on her period with no pad

845
00:43:43,200 --> 00:43:47,200
or tampon and just bled for all
26.2 miles.

846
00:43:47,280 --> 00:43:50,640
What do you do?
Yeah, I mean, that was that was

847
00:43:50,640 --> 00:43:52,600
a shock story in the media for a
hot minute.

848
00:43:52,680 --> 00:43:56,160
And I am imagined she was hauled
of the coals for being

849
00:43:56,160 --> 00:43:59,760
disgusting and gross and oh oh
oh, and yet be coarse.

850
00:43:59,960 --> 00:44:02,120
Fine art men aren't even washing
their hands.

851
00:44:02,720 --> 00:44:04,600
I would take blood any day over
shit.

852
00:44:04,800 --> 00:44:08,520
Yep, definitely.
All right, well, before we wrap

853
00:44:08,520 --> 00:44:11,440
up, I have a question for you.
What's something we haven't

854
00:44:11,440 --> 00:44:14,040
talked about yet in terms of
hygiene or cleanliness that

855
00:44:14,040 --> 00:44:17,040
really gives you the ick?
Not something as obvious as

856
00:44:17,040 --> 00:44:21,160
shitting your pants, but maybe
something a little bit more

857
00:44:21,160 --> 00:44:23,840
subtle.
Do you want to go first or do

858
00:44:23,840 --> 00:44:25,360
you want me to see?
I want to hear yours.

859
00:44:25,360 --> 00:44:31,600
OK, so mine is feet.
OK, so I know men clean men,

860
00:44:31,840 --> 00:44:35,880
yeah, who wash, Yeah, who use
soap, who are not walking around

861
00:44:35,880 --> 00:44:38,640
with shit in their pants.
But.

862
00:44:38,640 --> 00:44:39,920
Well, those things I.
Know.

863
00:44:40,000 --> 00:44:40,920
Right.
Amazing.

864
00:44:41,640 --> 00:44:44,880
Wow, what a catch.
But when they take their shoes

865
00:44:44,880 --> 00:44:47,480
off and you see their feet,
their feet are gross.

866
00:44:47,800 --> 00:44:50,960
Yeah, right.
Like they have toenails that

867
00:44:50,960 --> 00:44:53,440
look like claws or like little
horns.

868
00:44:53,480 --> 00:44:55,000
You know what I'm talking about,
right?

869
00:44:55,360 --> 00:44:58,120
You know exactly what I'm
talking about and like.

870
00:44:58,120 --> 00:45:01,680
Sadly, yes.
No moisturizer ever used, right?

871
00:45:01,680 --> 00:45:05,240
Like their whole feet, their
whole foot is like cracking.

872
00:45:05,240 --> 00:45:07,320
The skin is like really thick
and cracking.

873
00:45:07,880 --> 00:45:10,720
And I just want to say get
pedicures.

874
00:45:11,200 --> 00:45:13,960
Yeah, right.
Let's normalize pedicures for

875
00:45:13,960 --> 00:45:15,960
the men.
And and cutting your nails

876
00:45:16,240 --> 00:45:18,360
right, like nail care down
there.

877
00:45:18,960 --> 00:45:20,080
It's.
My God.

878
00:45:20,400 --> 00:45:23,600
Right.
I mean, OK, look, I don't have

879
00:45:23,840 --> 00:45:29,280
any kind of foot fetish, but if
I'm dating a man, I feel like I

880
00:45:29,280 --> 00:45:32,440
should be.
I should not feel weird about

881
00:45:32,440 --> 00:45:34,960
putting my mouth on any part of
that man's body.

882
00:45:35,240 --> 00:45:36,720
Like any part.
Any part.

883
00:45:36,720 --> 00:45:38,800
Yeah, Any part, Yeah, Including
the feet.

884
00:45:38,800 --> 00:45:41,200
If.
It went there, no judgement if

885
00:45:41,200 --> 00:45:43,160
it went there.
Yeah, I mean, I don't want to

886
00:45:43,160 --> 00:45:46,520
lick a man's feet, but like, it
shouldn't make me want to throw

887
00:45:46,520 --> 00:45:49,920
up to look at them, right?
Yeah, or maybe to give them a

888
00:45:49,920 --> 00:45:51,400
foot massage.
Yeah, right.

889
00:45:51,400 --> 00:45:53,160
Even just like a wee foot rub.
Right.

890
00:45:53,160 --> 00:45:56,320
Like, but if they look like
that, I don't want to them and I

891
00:45:56,320 --> 00:45:59,480
kind of don't want to be in bed
with them because it's nasty.

892
00:45:59,760 --> 00:46:02,040
Oh, it'll flick off in the bed.
Yeah, right.

893
00:46:02,120 --> 00:46:06,360
Or what if they like scratch you
with those claw like nails?

894
00:46:06,360 --> 00:46:08,400
Oh.
They come in for the big spoon

895
00:46:08,400 --> 00:46:10,960
and it's like they slash open
your leg.

896
00:46:11,160 --> 00:46:12,520
With their heels.
Disgusting.

897
00:46:12,520 --> 00:46:17,000
I mean, their nails, Yeah, but I
mean to bring it back, like,

898
00:46:17,000 --> 00:46:19,360
yes, I mean, any part of a man's
body.

899
00:46:19,400 --> 00:46:24,840
Yeah.
I mean, I, I, you know, I have

900
00:46:25,080 --> 00:46:27,400
tossed a salad before and I
enjoyed it.

901
00:46:27,480 --> 00:46:29,880
Wait, what does that mean
really?

902
00:46:29,880 --> 00:46:33,960
I really don't know.
I I must be so innocent or else.

903
00:46:33,960 --> 00:46:37,640
I might just be an Americanism,
but to to lick their asshole.

904
00:46:37,840 --> 00:46:43,560
Oh oh, oh that.
But it sounds so pleasant, like

905
00:46:43,560 --> 00:46:46,360
a salad is nice.
Well, I mean, I feel.

906
00:46:46,360 --> 00:46:48,880
Like, that's an inaccurate name,
but that's, yeah.

907
00:46:48,960 --> 00:46:50,440
I don't know where it comes
from, Huh?

908
00:46:51,040 --> 00:46:55,080
You know, And asshole's not that
bad if it's if it's clean inside

909
00:46:55,080 --> 00:46:57,280
and out.
It's just like an orifice, if

910
00:46:57,280 --> 00:46:59,720
any orifice.
Am I using that correctly?

911
00:46:59,720 --> 00:47:00,520
Yes.
Thank you.

912
00:47:00,520 --> 00:47:02,000
I have to check with the
scientist.

913
00:47:03,360 --> 00:47:07,080
Yeah, If it's cleaned, yes, it's
fine.

914
00:47:07,200 --> 00:47:10,000
Absolutely.
I mean I've definitely enjoyed

915
00:47:10,000 --> 00:47:14,240
it in a particular situation.
I mean you know the situation

916
00:47:14,240 --> 00:47:17,680
ship that I've I've had going on
from time to time.

917
00:47:18,920 --> 00:47:23,520
We're going to call this person
Mr. 11, Mr. 11, yes, Mr. 11

918
00:47:23,560 --> 00:47:26,920
because I know Mr. 11 an 11 out
of 10 at least in terms of

919
00:47:26,920 --> 00:47:29,520
physical appearance.
Now when we talk about emotional

920
00:47:29,520 --> 00:47:32,280
availability, that score might
be a little lower.

921
00:47:32,480 --> 00:47:34,480
But we might go into the minus.
Figures.

922
00:47:34,640 --> 00:47:38,400
But maybe potentially.
But yeah, I enjoy tossing that

923
00:47:38,400 --> 00:47:40,000
salad.
He is, he is.

924
00:47:40,080 --> 00:47:45,280
I know who this person is and he
is toss salad worthy. 100% yeah,

925
00:47:45,280 --> 00:47:47,200
he is beautiful and he is clean.
Is.

926
00:47:47,200 --> 00:47:50,360
He clean I was every he looks.
Like of him is clean.

927
00:47:50,480 --> 00:47:53,360
Yeah yes, he does it all, all
the hygiene.

928
00:47:53,480 --> 00:47:55,760
Oh my God, solid.
So it is possible.

929
00:47:56,000 --> 00:47:59,280
It is possible.
It exists, but even the fact

930
00:47:59,280 --> 00:48:01,640
that we were like, wow, that's
amazing.

931
00:48:02,640 --> 00:48:05,120
High, low, the bar.
Is it's pretty low.

932
00:48:05,360 --> 00:48:08,960
It's like underground at this
point, like you get a high 5 for

933
00:48:08,960 --> 00:48:11,880
just cleansing yourself.
Yeah, like taking a shower.

934
00:48:12,200 --> 00:48:13,400
All right, I want to hear your
ick.

935
00:48:13,800 --> 00:48:17,440
Oh God, feet.
I mean, I that was all relatable

936
00:48:17,440 --> 00:48:21,480
because yeah, definitely seen
that shitty pants man didn't

937
00:48:21,480 --> 00:48:25,280
have great feet either.
And yeah, it's, it's, it's just

938
00:48:25,280 --> 00:48:27,840
not hot.
I think for me.

939
00:48:27,920 --> 00:48:30,560
And honestly, this isn't gender
specific because I've definitely

940
00:48:30,560 --> 00:48:35,040
seen it in some females too.
Dirt below your fingernails.

941
00:48:36,000 --> 00:48:39,280
Yuck.
Like you can see your hands at

942
00:48:39,280 --> 00:48:45,840
all times and surely you would
notice if there is, like you

943
00:48:45,840 --> 00:48:48,080
know, if you're doing yard work,
totally different.

944
00:48:48,080 --> 00:48:49,480
Story.
Oh sure, but then you wash it

945
00:48:49,480 --> 00:48:51,400
off.
Yeah, and but.

946
00:48:51,880 --> 00:48:55,240
Constantly.
But like actual stuff under the

947
00:48:55,240 --> 00:48:57,440
nail, that's discussed because
there's no need.

948
00:48:57,840 --> 00:48:59,960
And if you're washing your hands
regularly, you would imagine

949
00:48:59,960 --> 00:49:02,360
that that would kind of take
care of that stuff too, like.

950
00:49:02,520 --> 00:49:05,280
But we learned that they aren't.
We learned that they aren't, so

951
00:49:05,280 --> 00:49:08,200
that would explain dirt under.
The I mean God forbid they have

952
00:49:08,200 --> 00:49:11,880
a nail brush.
Oh my God, they're asking so

953
00:49:11,880 --> 00:49:13,840
much.
You are so needy, Melissa.

954
00:49:13,840 --> 00:49:16,640
I can't Even so needy.
That's why I'm single.

955
00:49:16,720 --> 00:49:23,240
Yeah, me too, girl.
I feel a little queasy after all

956
00:49:23,240 --> 00:49:25,480
this talk today.
I mean, I just took a shower and

957
00:49:25,480 --> 00:49:26,760
I feel like I'm going to go take
another one.

958
00:49:27,120 --> 00:49:29,360
Definitely with soap, yes, to be
clear.

959
00:49:29,400 --> 00:49:32,520
And a washcloth, yes.
Wow, this is.

960
00:49:32,520 --> 00:49:36,720
Why I want to marry you?
Yes, I think, I mean that's

961
00:49:36,720 --> 00:49:39,360
coming.
Yeah, that is you are marriage

962
00:49:39,360 --> 00:49:40,880
material.
Oh, you too, girl.

963
00:49:40,920 --> 00:49:44,600
For so many things, not just
your regular regular hygiene

964
00:49:44,600 --> 00:49:46,160
schedule.
I love you.

965
00:49:46,400 --> 00:49:50,320
I love you too.
All right, well, I think let's

966
00:49:50,680 --> 00:49:54,760
wrap up this topic of hygiene.
Any other last notes you want to

967
00:49:54,760 --> 00:49:56,320
add about men who don't use
SOAP?

968
00:49:57,400 --> 00:50:01,400
Just just please start for the
love of God, just just for

969
00:50:01,400 --> 00:50:04,200
yourself, like for yourself,
like when you were talking about

970
00:50:04,200 --> 00:50:07,800
the feet, I was like, why could
you not feel that in your shoes,

971
00:50:07,960 --> 00:50:11,000
right, Because like that's
sometimes I'm like, oh, what is

972
00:50:11,480 --> 00:50:13,680
you know, but it's not at like a
desperate point.

973
00:50:13,680 --> 00:50:17,960
It's just like, Oh, I should
maybe get a petty or trim that.

974
00:50:18,520 --> 00:50:22,920
Like just just just lean into
your bodies men, and make

975
00:50:22,920 --> 00:50:27,320
yourself comfortable and in turn
make the world comfortable.

976
00:50:27,560 --> 00:50:29,200
I love it.
Well said.

977
00:50:29,640 --> 00:50:31,240
Thank you.
All right, Well, we're going to

978
00:50:31,240 --> 00:50:33,280
wrap up.
Before we do that, we're going

979
00:50:33,280 --> 00:50:35,760
to play a little game.
OK, what's?

980
00:50:35,800 --> 00:50:38,080
Our game this.
Is called Smash a pass?

981
00:50:38,120 --> 00:50:41,160
Which is another term that you
had to explain to me today.

982
00:50:42,720 --> 00:50:46,520
I, you know, just I, Yeah.
You don't have another like term

983
00:50:46,520 --> 00:50:51,560
for this in Ireland.
I know not that I can think of.

984
00:50:51,960 --> 00:50:58,160
I mean, you would, you would say
that people the Bucky instead of

985
00:50:58,720 --> 00:51:01,840
they fuck you, they you know.
I like.

986
00:51:01,920 --> 00:51:06,120
That teenage boys that would go
albucky and that's that's with

987
00:51:06,120 --> 00:51:08,960
the accent and all.
But no, we haven't solidified it

988
00:51:08,960 --> 00:51:12,000
into a game.
OK, well, we're going to just

989
00:51:12,160 --> 00:51:14,560
start it off.
Maybe this will become a regular

990
00:51:14,560 --> 00:51:16,520
feature.
We will see how it goes.

991
00:51:16,720 --> 00:51:19,000
Let's see.
But today we're going to do

992
00:51:19,080 --> 00:51:21,160
American presidents.
OK?

993
00:51:21,160 --> 00:51:26,760
So smash or pass, we're going to
just do a whole bunch of them.

994
00:51:26,960 --> 00:51:31,440
OK, And let's start out with may
be an easy one.

995
00:51:31,480 --> 00:51:34,840
OK, we're going to throw it all
the way back to the founding of

996
00:51:34,840 --> 00:51:38,640
our country.
Thomas Jefferson Smasher Pass.

997
00:51:40,160 --> 00:51:44,240
You know, I I think that I
should get some kind of like

998
00:51:44,640 --> 00:51:48,240
accommodation here, being
foreigner and all, because I

999
00:51:48,240 --> 00:51:52,520
can't necessarily totally recall
everybody, but, and I won't give

1000
00:51:52,520 --> 00:51:54,480
as long an answer.
Sorry, I know this isn't the

1001
00:51:54,480 --> 00:51:57,120
point of the game.
I'm, I'm going to say pass.

1002
00:51:57,400 --> 00:51:59,000
Oh, OK.
Yeah, All right.

1003
00:51:59,000 --> 00:52:00,040
I like it.
Would you?

1004
00:52:00,680 --> 00:52:02,040
No.
I'm going to say pass as well.

1005
00:52:02,200 --> 00:52:05,160
OK, cool.
He just seems a little too

1006
00:52:05,160 --> 00:52:07,160
earnest for me.
Perhaps.

1007
00:52:07,440 --> 00:52:09,680
Also, I kind of feel like the
founding fathers were the tech

1008
00:52:09,680 --> 00:52:11,720
Bros of their day, and that kind
of turns me off.

1009
00:52:11,880 --> 00:52:12,800
Yeah.
Was that fair?

1010
00:52:13,040 --> 00:52:15,720
I think that it's like that
video with them all dancing on

1011
00:52:15,720 --> 00:52:17,880
the stage the the Microsoft
guys.

1012
00:52:17,880 --> 00:52:19,400
It's just.
Yeah, Yeah.

1013
00:52:19,440 --> 00:52:20,160
Pretty cringe.
Yeah.

1014
00:52:20,400 --> 00:52:23,120
No, sorry, Thomas.
All right, we're not going to do

1015
00:52:23,120 --> 00:52:25,040
these in historical order.
OK?

1016
00:52:25,040 --> 00:52:27,760
We're just going to jump around.
Let's go.

1017
00:52:27,760 --> 00:52:29,920
More recent Bill Clinton Smash
or pass?

1018
00:52:30,800 --> 00:52:35,560
That would be a pass yeah,
sorry, I like bleeded that out.

1019
00:52:35,920 --> 00:52:38,200
I'm just gonna say pass.
He gives me the Eck.

1020
00:52:38,480 --> 00:52:40,240
Okay, that's not.
Political.

1021
00:52:40,320 --> 00:52:42,560
It's just no, totally fair.
We're not doing politics.

1022
00:52:42,560 --> 00:52:43,320
Here.
No, we're not.

1023
00:52:43,400 --> 00:52:46,840
This is like just.
Yeah, there was something

1024
00:52:46,840 --> 00:52:48,800
bulbous about the nose.
I don't know.

1025
00:52:48,920 --> 00:52:51,800
Fair.
Are we both answering or how

1026
00:52:52,040 --> 00:52:53,960
does this scheme work?
No, we're both answering.

1027
00:52:53,960 --> 00:52:57,280
So would you hit that?
Yeah, I'm gonna go smash God.

1028
00:52:57,320 --> 00:52:59,320
Okay, cool.
I like a southern accent, what

1029
00:52:59,320 --> 00:53:01,120
can I say?
It's the accent.

1030
00:53:01,120 --> 00:53:04,000
Yeah, it's pretty nice.
Okay, All right, what about

1031
00:53:04,000 --> 00:53:06,680
Andrew Jackson?
I'm back again.

1032
00:53:06,680 --> 00:53:10,200
I just want to sing that song
the the Miss Jackson and go woo

1033
00:53:10,520 --> 00:53:11,840
woo.
You know what?

1034
00:53:11,840 --> 00:53:16,680
When I was in Sweden over the
winter, we ran into a Polish

1035
00:53:16,680 --> 00:53:19,200
bartender who was obsessed with
Andrew Jackson and he told me

1036
00:53:19,200 --> 00:53:22,360
many, many fun facts about our
US presidents, but especially

1037
00:53:22,360 --> 00:53:24,400
Jackson.
Oh my God, so you're like deeply

1038
00:53:24,400 --> 00:53:26,560
invested.
So would you smash or pass then?

1039
00:53:27,040 --> 00:53:28,440
I want to hear your answer
first.

1040
00:53:30,120 --> 00:53:35,200
I actually think I would smash
but just be a stone because I

1041
00:53:35,200 --> 00:53:39,920
had to to to like Google some of
these and dude dude had it going

1042
00:53:39,920 --> 00:53:41,840
on.
I mean, he, he was good looking.

1043
00:53:42,080 --> 00:53:45,640
I'm going to go pass after my
conversation with my Polish

1044
00:53:45,640 --> 00:53:48,400
bartender.
Man was batshit crazy.

1045
00:53:48,880 --> 00:53:51,800
And I mean, I don't mind a
little crazy, but it's a bridge

1046
00:53:51,800 --> 00:53:53,360
too far.
But a lot crazy.

1047
00:53:53,360 --> 00:53:54,760
Yeah, Yeah, we don't.
Want that?

1048
00:53:54,920 --> 00:53:56,640
That's fair.
That's fair, that's fair.

1049
00:53:56,920 --> 00:54:00,520
All right, how about let's go
JFK, John F Kennedy?

1050
00:54:00,760 --> 00:54:03,840
I mean, that's a no brainer I
feel, I feel like but also.

1051
00:54:04,560 --> 00:54:06,640
Same answer, right?
Smash.

1052
00:54:06,880 --> 00:54:09,080
Smash.
But also, like, I can't get out

1053
00:54:09,080 --> 00:54:11,320
of my head the way he spoke to
Marilyn Monroe.

1054
00:54:11,320 --> 00:54:14,880
So that would pass.
But it was purely just like, are

1055
00:54:14,880 --> 00:54:18,000
my loin stirring?
They would be stirred 100%.

1056
00:54:18,000 --> 00:54:18,640
Yeah.
Yeah.

1057
00:54:18,640 --> 00:54:19,400
OK.
Smash.

1058
00:54:19,400 --> 00:54:21,520
So we're into it.
OK OK.

1059
00:54:21,520 --> 00:54:28,280
What about Richard Nixon?
Definitely.

1060
00:54:28,600 --> 00:54:31,240
Like even the foreigner.
Is like, that would be a hard

1061
00:54:31,240 --> 00:54:32,760
pass.
Yeah, that's a pass.

1062
00:54:32,760 --> 00:54:35,240
That's too creepy.
That's it kind of makes my skin

1063
00:54:35,240 --> 00:54:35,800
crawl.
Yeah.

1064
00:54:35,840 --> 00:54:37,880
Even though I bet he washed
actually.

1065
00:54:38,400 --> 00:54:40,040
Do you think he looked like a
washer?

1066
00:54:40,040 --> 00:54:42,960
So yeah, I think he probably
washed OK.

1067
00:54:42,960 --> 00:54:45,960
I mean, he was a politician.
Or would they be better or

1068
00:54:45,960 --> 00:54:47,360
worse?
I'm sure they people tell them.

1069
00:54:47,360 --> 00:54:48,480
What to do better?
Yeah.

1070
00:54:48,520 --> 00:54:50,360
Yeah.
Still still a pass.

1071
00:54:50,760 --> 00:54:52,160
OK Yeah, definitely a pass.
Yeah.

1072
00:54:52,760 --> 00:54:54,360
All right.
Throwing back again.

1073
00:54:54,360 --> 00:54:57,400
How about Rutherford B Hayes?
Who?

1074
00:54:57,640 --> 00:55:00,840
What I'm like, I don't know
about that one.

1075
00:55:00,840 --> 00:55:02,440
I'm gonna.
Have to show you a picture.

1076
00:55:02,520 --> 00:55:04,320
Of that.
Oh yeah, pull, pull him up.

1077
00:55:04,480 --> 00:55:09,000
Oh, wait, no, I do remember he's
the really hot guy so hot.

1078
00:55:09,120 --> 00:55:13,600
So, like, I can I couldn't tell
you his name, but smash a hell

1079
00:55:13,600 --> 00:55:15,240
yeah, smash.
OK, smash.

1080
00:55:15,560 --> 00:55:19,880
He looks, he looks like a like
an AI creation or something like

1081
00:55:19,920 --> 00:55:21,720
he's wow.
Amazing.

1082
00:55:22,360 --> 00:55:26,480
Yes.
OK, how about well, let's let's

1083
00:55:26,480 --> 00:55:28,840
do another, I think easy one.
Barack Obama.

1084
00:55:28,840 --> 00:55:32,880
Oh, no brainer.
Smash, smash, smash again.

1085
00:55:32,880 --> 00:55:35,200
OK, twice on Sunday.
Sorry, Sir.

1086
00:55:35,240 --> 00:55:37,960
Like not to degrade you, but not
disrespectful.

1087
00:55:37,960 --> 00:55:39,960
We don't you know, we love you,
Michelle.

1088
00:55:39,960 --> 00:55:43,040
We respect Michelle too much.
But but in this theoretical game

1089
00:55:43,040 --> 00:55:45,160
that we're playing, 100% smash.
Yep.

1090
00:55:45,600 --> 00:55:47,600
All right, let's go with the
bushes.

1091
00:55:47,600 --> 00:55:52,160
OK, so.
Bush senior double on China

1092
00:55:52,200 --> 00:55:54,200
there.
Let's go with the Bushes.

1093
00:55:54,200 --> 00:55:57,960
Bush #1 Bush, Bush #1.
So like the older one?

1094
00:55:57,960 --> 00:56:02,280
Yeah, the first Bush, not G Dub.
But not yeah, the the senior,

1095
00:56:02,560 --> 00:56:04,800
well, he was like a Suavo guy,
right?

1096
00:56:04,800 --> 00:56:06,840
But like.
And he's seen his younger

1097
00:56:06,840 --> 00:56:09,000
pictures.
Well, this is what I hear.

1098
00:56:09,280 --> 00:56:12,920
Like it's so smash pre
presidents.

1099
00:56:12,920 --> 00:56:13,520
Yeah.
Oh yeah.

1100
00:56:13,520 --> 00:56:16,080
No, this is all mostly pre
presidency.

1101
00:56:16,080 --> 00:56:20,200
I mean, maybe not a vomit JFK,
but yes, yeah, I would say

1102
00:56:20,200 --> 00:56:22,320
smash.
I would say smash, yeah.

1103
00:56:22,400 --> 00:56:26,200
Yeah, we we are non partisan in
this podcast and.

1104
00:56:26,200 --> 00:56:28,080
There's no politics.
Here, smash across.

1105
00:56:28,080 --> 00:56:30,600
The aisle absolutely smash
across the aisle.

1106
00:56:30,600 --> 00:56:33,560
Yep, all right.
What about Bush the second Bush

1107
00:56:33,560 --> 00:56:38,000
#2?
I mean, you know, I just think

1108
00:56:38,000 --> 00:56:41,360
of like David Letterman's little
skit that he did.

1109
00:56:41,360 --> 00:56:45,400
There were too many presidential
no pass.

1110
00:56:45,400 --> 00:56:46,600
You're passing I'm.
Passing.

1111
00:56:46,600 --> 00:56:49,480
What are you smashing?
You know, I'm on the fence about

1112
00:56:49,480 --> 00:56:51,560
this one, actually.
Is that weird?

1113
00:56:51,800 --> 00:56:53,880
I don't know, no.
Because he was very cute when he

1114
00:56:53,880 --> 00:56:55,680
was younger.
He was very cute and I think

1115
00:56:55,680 --> 00:56:58,480
he's by all accounts like a
cute, adorable old man who

1116
00:56:58,480 --> 00:57:00,320
paints now.
I know, right?

1117
00:57:00,320 --> 00:57:02,360
So kind of adorable.
Yeah.

1118
00:57:02,360 --> 00:57:04,480
I'm going to go with a soft
smash, OK?

1119
00:57:04,520 --> 00:57:05,760
Soft smash soft.
Smash.

1120
00:57:05,760 --> 00:57:09,440
That's fair, yeah.
OK, all right, the daddy got it

1121
00:57:09,440 --> 00:57:10,720
all there.
Yeah, OK.

1122
00:57:10,720 --> 00:57:16,920
What about Lyndon Baines Johnson
LBJLBJLBJ Which?

1123
00:57:16,920 --> 00:57:23,120
I mean, his name should suggest
that we would smash, but you

1124
00:57:23,120 --> 00:57:25,480
know, I'm going to pass.
Fair, Yeah.

1125
00:57:25,760 --> 00:57:28,560
It's it's just like a visceral
response.

1126
00:57:28,800 --> 00:57:29,960
Yeah.
What about you?

1127
00:57:31,240 --> 00:57:33,520
Well, he was a really abrasive
guy.

1128
00:57:33,600 --> 00:57:35,200
Yeah.
Did some good things.

1129
00:57:36,120 --> 00:57:39,760
Maybe not so great in his
personal life or how he treated

1130
00:57:39,760 --> 00:57:40,480
people.
But you know what?

1131
00:57:40,480 --> 00:57:43,080
I'm going to go smash because I
love a filthy mouth.

1132
00:57:43,400 --> 00:57:45,760
Oh, that's fair.
That's a smash.

1133
00:57:45,880 --> 00:57:46,560
That's.
Fair.

1134
00:57:46,640 --> 00:57:48,040
All right, last and final
president.

1135
00:57:48,040 --> 00:57:49,600
We're not going to do them all.
Sorry, friends.

1136
00:57:50,800 --> 00:57:53,680
Teddy Roosevelt.
Smash, smash.

1137
00:57:53,680 --> 00:57:55,560
That's 100%.
I didn't have to give a

1138
00:57:55,560 --> 00:57:56,840
clarifying sentence.
Right.

1139
00:57:57,040 --> 00:57:58,440
Yeah.
Such an interesting guy.

1140
00:57:58,440 --> 00:58:00,280
Smash. 100% Smash.
Love it.

1141
00:58:00,480 --> 00:58:03,600
OK, well that is our show for
today.

1142
00:58:03,960 --> 00:58:06,840
We're so glad you joined us.
And I'm going to have to wear a

1143
00:58:06,840 --> 00:58:09,520
bag over my head in public
because I feel shame over a

1144
00:58:09,520 --> 00:58:11,760
man's shitty pants.
What's that about?

1145
00:58:11,760 --> 00:58:14,560
We need a psychologist.
Girl, that's something to unpack

1146
00:58:14,560 --> 00:58:18,840
in therapy or potentially on
future episodes of this podcast.

1147
00:58:18,840 --> 00:58:20,160
There is that.
All right.

1148
00:58:20,160 --> 00:58:22,440
Well, I'm Melissa and this is
Claire.

1149
00:58:22,640 --> 00:58:24,920
We are the salty hoes.
We'll see you next time.

1150
00:58:24,920 --> 00:58:26,240
Bye bye.