Douchebags, Dumbasses, and Drunks

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Hello and welcome back everyone.
I'm Mel and I'm Claire, and

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together we are the Salty O's.
Welcome back to another amazing

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episode of our podcast.
Claire, I was going to ask how

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you are, but I actually saw you
very, very recently at a coffee

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shop.
Hours ago, in fact.

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Just hours ago.
But yeah, I think we need to

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share the coffee shop experience
for the benefit of our lovely

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listeners.
Yeah, we could do that.

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So we had planned to meet at a
certain coffee shop and I pulled

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in.
I was looking for parking, kind

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of cursing the construction
that's going on near your house.

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Yes.
And pulled in and as I'm walking

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to the coffee shop, I get a text
from my lovely Claire saying

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that there's like 100 people
here at Loki.

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And I was like, Loki, that's not
where we're meeting today.

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Can I also just point out that
the coffee shop that Melissa

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Ralla, very kindly, because she
knows who I am, and in a text

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yesterday said let's just keep
it simple and we'll meet at this

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coffee shop.
And I was like, yeah, oh, that

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sounds great.
This coffee shop is about 200

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yards from my house.
Right, that's why I picked it.

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That is why you picked very
kindly because you're like, I'll

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make it easy.
Because she may actually be on

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time.
Because I am that person.

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And I got into my car and drove
to another coffee shop and I was

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so pride because I was on time.
You were on time.

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You beat me there.
It was just the wrong coffee

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shop.
Oh my God, I am.

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So.
Grateful for your patience with

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me and that you still love me
even though I am a complete Ding

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Dong.
No, you're not a complete Ding

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Dong, you just have, well, I'm
trying to help you out here.

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You just have 8,000,000 things
rattling around in your poor

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head at all times.
This is fair, but I still very

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much appreciate your grief
because.

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Yeah, I just laughed.
I got that text and I just

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laughed.
I was like, of course she's a

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lucky.
I was just, I was trying to stop

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myself from going into a deep
shame Sparrow like I am.

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I like this.
Like I think that about five

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times every day.
I'm like, why?

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Like I really try, but it just
doesn't often work.

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Well, to be fair, we've met at
Loki before, so it doesn't make

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sense that you would that would
occur to you.

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And honestly, it has the best
coffee in olive salty.

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Oh, Loki's amazing coffee is
perfection.

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Shout out to Loki.
Yeah.

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And honestly, the only reason I
didn't suggest it yesterday when

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we made this plan was simply
because the seating there is

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kind of.
Oh yeah, tough, because it is

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just packed.
Yeah, like all the time.

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Secret's out, yeah.
Secret's out.

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Loki is the best.
Yeah.

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So it's kind of hard to, like,
sit down and spread out and,

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like, have a little conference,
right.

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Or be guaranteed you can get a
wee seat.

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Period.
Exactly.

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Yes.
Yeah.

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Well, anyway, again I appreciate
you.

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You are great.
But I I very speedily.

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Returned and it worked out fine.
Yeah, absolutely.

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Yes, it was wonderful.
We had a lovely little chat and

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coffee and we thought that like
today, we could share a few more

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dating stories, some of the
amazing man that we have met up

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with.
Well, we we told like our good

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stories, our success stories,
kind of.

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I mean, mine wasn't a success
story, but it.

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Started off good, that's true I
guess, as did mine and they both

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deteriorated but there was brief
moments of.

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Joy, yes, for you.
These.

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Yeah, that's true.
You didn't even get to a joy

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moment.
No, not joy.

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Just like, oh, this isn't so
bad.

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Right.
Sometimes that is just the

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metric, you know, if like our
married friends will say, oh,

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you did.
I'm so excited.

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I hope it goes well.
And I'm like, I'm just hoping

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that it will be OK.
Yeah.

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Well, I mean, I think we should
talk about how low the bar can

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actually be.
So I'm going to let you start.

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Why don't you share a story, A
dating story?

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Well, so I actually, this one's
terrible.

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I can't even remember this man's
name because I think I have

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blocked it.
That's completely fair.

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My Bri and we.
Could give him a pseudonym.

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Yeah, let's make one up for him.
OK.

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We could call him.
We normally are are good with

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these names.
Let's call him Honeypot.

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Honeypot.
I love that.

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Oh my God, that's so funny.
It's a double entendre because

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he he he bought me a jar of
honey as a diet gift.

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Wow.
Uh huh.

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And also he's, we are
analogizing him to a porta

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potty.
We absolutely are wonderful.

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So I'm very excited.
Maybe that was like, some

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foreshadowing, like the honey on
the diet.

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Yeah.
Well, we already said it wasn't

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going to go Well, Yes.
I don't think we're spoiling

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anything for our listeners right
now.

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Yeah, it was interesting.
And he drove a couple 100 miles

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for this diet.
What?

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Yes.
Yeah.

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So he lived in southern Utah,
and we met in an app, and he was

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like, oh, I'll drive to Salt
Lake no problem.

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And that felt a little weird,
but also like I didn't want to

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drive there either.
So, you know, it just was what

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it was.
But.

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I mean, to be fair, I could
imagine that one's dating

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options in southern Utah might
be even more constricted, shall

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we say, than they are here in
Salt Lake City.

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So indeed, you know what?
I'm going to give him that.

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Yes.
And he tried.

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He did travel for work often.
I think that involves a lot of

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driving, like to Vegas and then
up to Salt Lake and Idaho.

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So you know, we tried to sync it
with some.

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Stuff.
Oh, OK.

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Well, there you go.
So it's fine.

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Not a big deal.
That's yeah.

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At maximum a four hour drive.
Yeah, not too bad.

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So he's fine.
Yeah, our European listeners are

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probably horrified by their life
right now.

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Why 4 hour?
Drive would be in another

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country, yeah.
We have to work for it here in

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the Wild West, yeah.
Yes, yes, yeah, it's big out

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here, y'all.
It's very big.

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Well, some things are big, but
yes, so So I did my due

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diligence.
We had several video calls to

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check that he was real, All the
security checks, Googled all the

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stuff.
So we went on a diet.

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I arrived, he had the the gift.
It was honey and plant.

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Food, yeah, not together, but
like had you talked about plant

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maintenance?
Is that where that came from?

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I just love that.
Bush maintenance.

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I just got waxed.
I did.

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Sorry, Did I out you?
I just had some Bush maintenance

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just this morning.
So shout out to Lindsay.

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Thanks, Lindsay.
Thank you.

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Yes, so we had had a video call
and he saw a plant in the

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background.
So he, I think maybe I mentioned

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that I like plants or, you know,
I have a lot of plants.

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All right, so he was trying.
It might be a little clumsy, but

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he was trying to be thoughtful.
Yes, it was very sweet and

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actually I think that is the
only first date I've had where

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someone presented with a gift.
Yeah, I don't think I've had a

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first date where someone brought
a gift.

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Yeah, it was.
It was unusual.

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That is, yeah, unusual.
Did it make you uncomfortable or

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did you like it?
It made me feel a bit funny, but

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I don't know why.
OK yeah yeah.

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But I'm a little weird and
defensive when it comes to

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dating so.
It could also be the we've had

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some experiences where men feel
entitled to, shall we say, some

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physical affection if they've
bought you coffee or a drink or

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something like that.
So maybe you were worried about

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some obligation being created,
and I think that would be a very

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natural reaction.
That's fair, even if it's not

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entirely conscious.
But I think sort of every woman,

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you know, I'm not.
I don't want to speak for

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everybody, but I would also say
every woman.

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Has.
Probably experienced like a

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small or large degree of that at
some point.

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So.
So yeah.

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So we had dinner.
I was late.

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I really, I try so hard.
I know that sounds so weak and

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ridiculous, but like, I promise
I am not just sitting going, oh,

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maybe I'll go.
I'm like, I'm going to do 402

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things before I leave the house
and I will be on time.

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So yeah, that tracks completely,
yes, but I need to try to be

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better.
In my defense that night though,

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the Uber did cancel, so I'm just
a couple of minutes.

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That's not your fault.
And honestly, a couple of

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minutes late, I mean within 5 or
10 minutes, to me that's still

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on time, right?
Wasn't like 1/2 hour any.

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Yeah, yeah.
So we had a nice dinner and it

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was pleasant.
Good.

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I didn't feel like immediate
sparks, but I didn't have like

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immediate ICS.
It was just.

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Pleasant.
I mean, for you, that's huge not

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to get icked out right away.
Yes.

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I have like a three second
threshold.

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I'm like, no, yeah, it's awkward
if it's a dinner date.

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My God.
And then you have to sit there

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for like one to two more hour.
I honestly try to avoid those

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for that reason.
Yeah.

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Just like a short, yeah.
Little coffee, tea, yeah, Keep

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it quick.
Yeah, this was not quick cuz

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dude had driven.
Yeah, several kind of Fair.

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You can see that.
Yeah, so we at he, he had a a

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laser focus on carbs, shall we
say.

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But that's a whole other podcast
episode.

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Yes.
Not a fan.

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Not a fan of carbs?
OK, we can come back to that.

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We can come back to that a lot.
Of things to say about, Oh yes,

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eating and eating disorders and
diets and so forth.

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And all the things.
So we had dinner and the

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restaurant.
I feel like all the restaurants

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in Salt Lake closed so early.
And he was like, do you want to

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grab a drink?
And I was like, oh, sure.

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So before all the bars on Main
Street burned down, we so sad,

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so sad.
We went into one of those and

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and then.
It took a sharp turn.

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No, no.
I was just like, what of all the

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things you could choose to talk
about on a first date, why are

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we going here?
Uh oh, where'd we go that we

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went?
Joe Roganville.

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Oh no.
We went full manosphere.

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Oh no.
Is that the manosphere?

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That's what they call it, yes.
Red pilled.

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Oh my God.
So here's the thing.

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If I was like to dinner and a
conversation about vaccinations

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came up with you, I would have
it because you were a scientist.

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Yes, you'd like you.
You know some stuff in this.

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Area I Do I know how vaccines
work.

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Yes, I teach about vaccines.
You have a terminal degree?

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I do in this area, 3° in
biology.

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Yes, I know a little.
Yes.

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So I I would totally have that
conversation and I would listen

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and be open to absolutely
anything you would have to say

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in the subject.
We could have a really good

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nuanced discussion on vaccines
if you wanted a. 100% but

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somebody who is referencing Joe
Rogan as their source, and I

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just said, oh, I thought you
told me you studied business.

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And he was like, oh, yeah.
And I was like, wow, it's

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amazing that you know so much
about vaccines.

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Oh my God, being.
Heavily sarcastic Katie, Yeah,

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Which I bet he did not get.
Oh, no, He was like, well, yeah.

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I mean, I listen to a lot of
podcasts.

228
00:11:38,960 --> 00:11:40,800
I do my own research.
Oh my God.

229
00:11:41,280 --> 00:11:43,040
Because, like, everybody's a
sheep.

230
00:11:44,120 --> 00:11:47,040
Yeah, but he is not.
Oh yeah, no, he's the only one

231
00:11:47,040 --> 00:11:49,040
that's awake.
Him and all the rest of Joe

232
00:11:49,080 --> 00:11:51,040
Rogan's listeners.
Exactly.

233
00:11:51,560 --> 00:11:55,280
But I feel like a lot of bar
staff, shout out to you all,

234
00:11:55,280 --> 00:11:58,600
have like a sixth sense when
they see horrendously it's

235
00:11:58,600 --> 00:12:00,400
happening.
They must see it every day of

236
00:12:00,400 --> 00:12:02,480
the week.
Oh my God, like all the time.

237
00:12:02,480 --> 00:12:06,240
So Gurley came over and
accidentally gave me like 2

238
00:12:06,240 --> 00:12:12,360
drinks, which is highly actually
illegal in Utah and but one of

239
00:12:12,360 --> 00:12:14,160
them wasn't open so I yes, it
wasn't.

240
00:12:14,160 --> 00:12:15,520
And she's like just put it in
your back.

241
00:12:15,560 --> 00:12:17,360
It was a little mini bottle of
Prosecco.

242
00:12:17,360 --> 00:12:19,920
It was so cute.
And I was like, oh, and she was

243
00:12:19,920 --> 00:12:22,320
just kind of like, she's like,
where's your consolation?

244
00:12:22,320 --> 00:12:23,960
Prize.
You're gonna need it.

245
00:12:25,840 --> 00:12:29,120
Oh my God.
And so I mean it just descended

246
00:12:29,120 --> 00:12:32,240
from there like well I didn't
get vaccinated and I'm super

247
00:12:32,240 --> 00:12:37,680
pride and you know, like I
people shamed me and I was just

248
00:12:37,680 --> 00:12:40,840
like Oh dear God.
But dude like went for like 2

249
00:12:40,840 --> 00:12:43,240
full hours.
Oh no, just monologue.

250
00:12:43,240 --> 00:12:46,920
Just monologue and you know that
I do not drink.

251
00:12:47,040 --> 00:12:48,240
A lot.
Not a lot, yeah.

252
00:12:48,240 --> 00:12:52,280
I'm like a lightweight 2, just
like 3 is like a hard night out

253
00:12:52,280 --> 00:12:54,520
for me.
I was on my 4th drink.

254
00:12:54,880 --> 00:12:58,080
Oh, I actually love it, Claire,
when you have 3 drinks because I

255
00:12:58,080 --> 00:13:00,360
feel like I get a million texts
and they're amazing.

256
00:13:00,400 --> 00:13:02,480
Oh God, yeah.
I did drunk text you from the

257
00:13:02,480 --> 00:13:05,040
airplane and very recently.
Yeah, I loved it.

258
00:13:05,040 --> 00:13:06,600
It was wonderful.
Well, you can do that anytime.

259
00:13:07,600 --> 00:13:11,400
Well, thank you and but he noted
my drinks.

260
00:13:12,240 --> 00:13:14,880
Oh, he counted that.
He counted them, yes.

261
00:13:14,960 --> 00:13:18,480
And he was derogatory about.
It Yeah, yeah, He was just like

262
00:13:18,480 --> 00:13:20,520
a little.
I notice you've had four drinks

263
00:13:20,520 --> 00:13:23,800
and I'm like, yeah, because you
may also notice that I haven't

264
00:13:23,800 --> 00:13:28,440
opened my mouth for two solid Rs
because I have got a manosphere

265
00:13:28,600 --> 00:13:31,440
monologue.
It was literally a manosphere

266
00:13:31,440 --> 00:13:32,640
monologue.
Oh, I'm so.

267
00:13:32,640 --> 00:13:35,720
Sorry, that's terrible.
It was so joyful and then we

268
00:13:35,720 --> 00:13:38,200
left and he was like, do you
want to come back to like, I

269
00:13:38,200 --> 00:13:40,760
think he was saying it like the
DoubleTree in or something.

270
00:13:41,040 --> 00:13:42,480
He was like, we could sit at the
lobby.

271
00:13:42,480 --> 00:13:44,600
I was like, DoubleTree insurance
don't have a lobby.

272
00:13:46,080 --> 00:13:48,520
They have a vending machine and
a chair.

273
00:13:49,760 --> 00:13:52,400
An ice machine?
Yes, we can sit in the glow of

274
00:13:52,400 --> 00:13:55,160
the ice machine, right?
And continue this monologue.

275
00:13:55,640 --> 00:13:58,160
I have many more facts to share
about vaccines.

276
00:13:58,440 --> 00:14:01,800
Oh God, with my business degree
knowledge, oh.

277
00:14:02,760 --> 00:14:05,120
My God, yeah.
So I was like, no, thank you.

278
00:14:05,240 --> 00:14:08,200
And yeah, I got an Uber and went
home.

279
00:14:08,440 --> 00:14:11,240
So that was that.
I mean, you really served your

280
00:14:11,240 --> 00:14:13,200
time.
Kudos for staying that long I

281
00:14:13,200 --> 00:14:13,960
guess.
I know.

282
00:14:13,960 --> 00:14:17,200
I don't know why I do that.
Yeah, well, it can be awkward in

283
00:14:17,200 --> 00:14:20,240
the moment, but yeah, I don't
know.

284
00:14:20,400 --> 00:14:22,520
Yeah, maybe something to
practice.

285
00:14:22,520 --> 00:14:23,840
Yes.
Walking away just.

286
00:14:23,840 --> 00:14:27,120
Looking at my watch and being
like I left the stove.

287
00:14:27,120 --> 00:14:30,400
On I must go.
I mean, you can always text me

288
00:14:30,400 --> 00:14:32,520
for an emergency call if you
need one.

289
00:14:32,560 --> 00:14:33,680
SOS.
Yeah.

290
00:14:33,760 --> 00:14:37,880
Yeah, so that was my fun
manosphere monologue date.

291
00:14:38,320 --> 00:14:40,480
Wow, yeah, good times.
Sounds terrible.

292
00:14:40,760 --> 00:14:42,400
It wasn't.
It wasn't fun.

293
00:14:42,640 --> 00:14:43,800
What about you?
What?

294
00:14:43,800 --> 00:14:47,160
What are you?
What stands out as a magical

295
00:14:47,480 --> 00:14:51,200
experience?
Well, I'll tell you one that

296
00:14:51,200 --> 00:14:54,520
just stands out because I
happened to run into this person

297
00:14:54,520 --> 00:14:56,280
this week.
Oh yeah.

298
00:14:56,800 --> 00:14:59,000
Did you say hi?
I did not.

299
00:14:59,000 --> 00:15:00,200
So let me tell you the whole
story.

300
00:15:02,280 --> 00:15:07,280
OK, so this is a person, we are
going to call him Hot Frosty.

301
00:15:07,960 --> 00:15:11,280
And the reason we're calling him
Hot Frosty is again, twofold.

302
00:15:11,840 --> 00:15:14,360
I love this meme number 1.
He is good looking.

303
00:15:14,400 --> 00:15:15,840
Yes, I think he's a good looking
guy.

304
00:15:15,960 --> 00:15:18,160
This is this is a good first
step.

305
00:15:18,240 --> 00:15:22,200
Yeah, and #2 I'm not going to
share his real name, but if I

306
00:15:22,520 --> 00:15:24,760
were to say his real name,
everybody would be like, that's

307
00:15:24,760 --> 00:15:27,040
not real.
That is the name of a Hallmark

308
00:15:27,040 --> 00:15:29,760
movie person.
Like, you know, the Christmas

309
00:15:29,760 --> 00:15:31,560
movie.
Yes, where the girl comes storm

310
00:15:31,560 --> 00:15:35,000
to her hometown.
It's it's literally a Hallmark

311
00:15:35,000 --> 00:15:37,480
Christmas movie name.
And it's his real name.

312
00:15:38,040 --> 00:15:38,560
Yeah.
Good.

313
00:15:38,600 --> 00:15:41,320
Anyway, so Hot Frosty, I thought
was Frosty.

314
00:15:41,320 --> 00:15:43,720
Very, very appropriate.
Yeah.

315
00:15:43,720 --> 00:15:44,480
I love it.
Yeah.

316
00:15:44,480 --> 00:15:48,120
So Hot Frosty and I matched over
a year ago, over the holidays

317
00:15:48,120 --> 00:15:50,760
last year.
We matched on an app and he was

318
00:15:50,800 --> 00:15:54,440
out of town, so we texted for
like maybe a week or so before

319
00:15:54,440 --> 00:15:59,360
we we met up.
And the text game was amazing.

320
00:15:59,400 --> 00:16:01,320
The answer on point.
Oh my.

321
00:16:01,360 --> 00:16:04,000
Goodness.
Like it was smart, Refreshing.

322
00:16:04,000 --> 00:16:04,800
Yeah.
Witty.

323
00:16:04,840 --> 00:16:08,760
It was fun.
Hot, Frosty is a physician.

324
00:16:08,760 --> 00:16:10,560
Another one of those
disappointing physicians.

325
00:16:10,680 --> 00:16:12,680
You have like a magnet.
I do.

326
00:16:12,720 --> 00:16:16,320
Yeah, for for like the lawyer
physician, like the the high

327
00:16:16,320 --> 00:16:18,240
profile lads.
Yep.

328
00:16:18,600 --> 00:16:21,240
Uh huh.
But whereas I have one for the

329
00:16:21,440 --> 00:16:23,760
entrepreneurs.
Entrepreneurs the Homosexual

330
00:16:23,760 --> 00:16:24,600
the.
Homosexual.

331
00:16:25,160 --> 00:16:27,480
I mean, I guess they've all kind
of turned out similarly, but at

332
00:16:27,480 --> 00:16:29,240
least usually I get a coffee out
of.

333
00:16:29,240 --> 00:16:30,920
It this is true, you're not
paying.

334
00:16:30,920 --> 00:16:35,920
For it, Yeah.
Anyway, so we did meet up for a

335
00:16:35,920 --> 00:16:37,680
coffee date once he was home.
Yeah.

336
00:16:37,680 --> 00:16:40,480
Coffee date was fine.
We went on a few dates.

337
00:16:40,560 --> 00:16:42,480
Yeah, I can't remember how many,
not many.

338
00:16:42,600 --> 00:16:45,480
Yeah, there was 3 maybe.
Yeah, something like that.

339
00:16:46,400 --> 00:16:49,000
And I did at one point go back
to his house.

340
00:16:49,000 --> 00:16:54,240
OK, Yeah.
Except for that was in Eunice.

341
00:16:54,240 --> 00:16:55,400
In there.
Yeah.

342
00:16:55,800 --> 00:16:59,760
Well, let's just say that it was
somewhat disappointing.

343
00:17:00,000 --> 00:17:02,360
Oh no.
OK.

344
00:17:02,360 --> 00:17:03,680
You have to share more about
that.

345
00:17:03,840 --> 00:17:07,800
Well, I, I don't want to like go
into all the details, but do you

346
00:17:07,800 --> 00:17:09,960
ever have those encounters where
you're like, why am I doing all

347
00:17:09,960 --> 00:17:12,520
the fucking work here?
Yeah, you're like, oh wow, this

348
00:17:12,520 --> 00:17:14,599
is very one sided.
Right.

349
00:17:14,599 --> 00:17:16,079
Like I'm doing all the work for
both of us.

350
00:17:16,079 --> 00:17:17,839
Oh, yes, yeah.
Not fun.

351
00:17:17,920 --> 00:17:20,160
Not fun.
No exhaustive tearing.

352
00:17:20,200 --> 00:17:21,400
Yeah.
And then at some point you're

353
00:17:21,400 --> 00:17:22,960
like, I hope this is over
quickly.

354
00:17:23,400 --> 00:17:26,040
They're like please God what do
we need to fake here for this to

355
00:17:27,200 --> 00:17:29,160
exactly.
Sorry lads, but we're just

356
00:17:29,160 --> 00:17:30,560
speaking the truth.
Yeah.

357
00:17:30,600 --> 00:17:32,080
I mean, be better and then we
don't have to.

358
00:17:32,080 --> 00:17:33,320
Fake, right?
Exactly.

359
00:17:33,320 --> 00:17:34,280
We don't like to.
Fake.

360
00:17:34,280 --> 00:17:37,360
No, it's not fun thinking.
It's not fun, but sometimes just

361
00:17:37,360 --> 00:17:39,680
to make a please God be over.
Yeah.

362
00:17:39,680 --> 00:17:41,400
When they don't know what
they're doing or they're

363
00:17:41,400 --> 00:17:43,480
unwilling to do it, yeah,
they're just like, OK.

364
00:17:43,480 --> 00:17:44,960
Yeah, you're like we're done
here.

365
00:17:44,960 --> 00:17:47,520
Yeah.
Although I know so like kind of

366
00:17:47,520 --> 00:17:51,440
disappointing, but then the
real, the real horror, and

367
00:17:51,440 --> 00:17:54,600
there's more the real, the real
horror began.

368
00:17:54,640 --> 00:17:58,400
Oh dear God, when I went to use
his bathroom.

369
00:17:58,520 --> 00:18:01,920
Oh my God.
And so he lives in one of these

370
00:18:01,920 --> 00:18:05,680
like cute bungalows, right?
So they're old.

371
00:18:06,000 --> 00:18:07,840
I used to live in one in the
avenues.

372
00:18:08,400 --> 00:18:13,160
And he like it's relevant
because he had two somewhat

373
00:18:13,160 --> 00:18:17,080
young kids and they, I think all
shared this bathroom.

374
00:18:17,080 --> 00:18:21,040
Yes, in this bathroom was a
fucking biohazard.

375
00:18:21,040 --> 00:18:26,760
Oh, dear God, it was disgusting.
Wow, disgusting.

376
00:18:27,000 --> 00:18:27,880
Claire.
Oh.

377
00:18:28,200 --> 00:18:29,280
My God.
It was.

378
00:18:29,320 --> 00:18:32,200
I mean there were multiple shit
stains inside.

379
00:18:32,200 --> 00:18:33,520
The toilet?
No, no, no, no, no.

380
00:18:33,520 --> 00:18:36,480
Oh yeah.
Multiple Oh clearly.

381
00:18:36,800 --> 00:18:38,280
God, they had been there for a
while.

382
00:18:38,280 --> 00:18:44,160
Oh, like, you know, the caked on
dear character, the word I am

383
00:18:44,200 --> 00:18:49,600
complicating what?
Yeah, multiple ring around the

384
00:18:49,600 --> 00:18:52,760
toilet, like the bright orange
like ring, which is that's a

385
00:18:52,760 --> 00:18:53,840
fungus.
That's a mold.

386
00:18:53,880 --> 00:18:56,680
That's like, it's nasty.
Weeks and two months.

387
00:18:56,680 --> 00:18:58,640
Yeah, neglect.
Right?

388
00:18:58,640 --> 00:19:02,400
Like the little dry pea splatter
all over the everything right?

389
00:19:02,400 --> 00:19:05,560
All over the toilet, I'm sure.
You just felt so hot in that

390
00:19:05,560 --> 00:19:07,680
moment.
Oh my God, I was like dry

391
00:19:07,680 --> 00:19:10,640
heaving in this in this
bathroom.

392
00:19:11,200 --> 00:19:13,960
And the sink was no better.
So like, you know, the little

393
00:19:13,960 --> 00:19:15,920
like nubs of the whiskers when
they shaved.

394
00:19:15,920 --> 00:19:19,880
Yes, like all over the sink, all
over the counter, like all over

395
00:19:19,880 --> 00:19:23,320
the floor, Right.
Toothpaste, like dry, congealed

396
00:19:23,320 --> 00:19:25,880
toothpaste.
Streaks everywhere.

397
00:19:25,880 --> 00:19:30,200
Oh my God, it was a horror.
It was out of a horror movie.

398
00:19:30,400 --> 00:19:32,600
Wow.
And so I'm trying to like pee

399
00:19:32,600 --> 00:19:34,320
without touching anything
stabbing.

400
00:19:34,440 --> 00:19:36,120
Like squatting out of the bowl,
you know?

401
00:19:37,200 --> 00:19:40,960
The helicopter moves like you do
a gross public toilet, right?

402
00:19:40,960 --> 00:19:43,560
And by the way, friends, if you
do do that, please wipe the seat

403
00:19:43,560 --> 00:19:45,800
afterwards.
Nobody wants to walk into like a

404
00:19:45,800 --> 00:19:48,480
freaking wetlands of your urine
all over the seats.

405
00:19:48,480 --> 00:19:50,680
We get the squat, but tidy up
after yourself.

406
00:19:50,720 --> 00:19:52,480
Right.
Or like build the little toilet

407
00:19:52,480 --> 00:19:54,680
paper barrier.
Right, we've all done that.

408
00:19:54,720 --> 00:19:57,800
Oh hell yes.
Oh my God, I love how we bring

409
00:19:57,800 --> 00:20:00,320
the things we think only we do
into the open.

410
00:20:00,520 --> 00:20:01,880
I think everybody does that.
Yes.

411
00:20:01,880 --> 00:20:04,040
The little triangle.
Yeah, exactly right.

412
00:20:04,080 --> 00:20:07,080
You like, grab yourself some
toilet paper and construct a

413
00:20:07,080 --> 00:20:10,720
little arts and crafts project
to protect your ass from this.

414
00:20:10,720 --> 00:20:15,600
Disgusting.
This is a biologist, I know.

415
00:20:15,600 --> 00:20:18,120
Like, you're probably not gonna
get any diseases from a toilet

416
00:20:18,120 --> 00:20:19,560
seat, but it's just like the
ick.

417
00:20:19,560 --> 00:20:22,680
Factor yes oh God yeah cuz
you're like things have touched

418
00:20:22,680 --> 00:20:24,280
here yeah that I don't want
touching on my.

419
00:20:24,280 --> 00:20:26,920
Skin, like, I don't want to sit
in people's urine or like,

420
00:20:26,920 --> 00:20:27,640
whatever.
Right?

421
00:20:27,640 --> 00:20:29,240
It's crazy.
Yeah, I know.

422
00:20:29,760 --> 00:20:31,800
You're so picky.
I know, right?

423
00:20:31,800 --> 00:20:34,000
Or if there's blood on the seat,
you're like, well, it's

424
00:20:34,000 --> 00:20:35,920
helicopter time.
Yes, yeah, yes.

425
00:20:36,240 --> 00:20:42,200
Hover, hover.
We're doing an air drop here and

426
00:20:42,200 --> 00:20:46,280
all those like, Pilates
movements, like engage your core

427
00:20:46,280 --> 00:20:51,200
strength, squat feet, toes
pointing forward, go take a wide

428
00:20:51,200 --> 00:20:53,280
stance.
Like who was that senator from

429
00:20:53,280 --> 00:20:55,520
Idaho that got busted in the
bathroom?

430
00:20:55,520 --> 00:20:56,960
Do you?
Oh my God.

431
00:20:57,000 --> 00:20:58,880
Mary Craig, I think.
Oh, wow.

432
00:20:58,880 --> 00:21:01,520
Oh yeah, no, he was taking a
wide stance in the bathroom.

433
00:21:01,520 --> 00:21:04,440
Well, yeah, what he was doing
was tapping the person next to

434
00:21:04,440 --> 00:21:07,320
him for like a gay hook up in
the bathroom and then he was

435
00:21:07,320 --> 00:21:09,880
saying no, it was all just a big
misunderstanding.

436
00:21:09,880 --> 00:21:12,920
Like I somehow accidentally I
made the signal that I wanted

437
00:21:12,920 --> 00:21:15,960
gay sex.
Wow, I do that all the time.

438
00:21:15,960 --> 00:21:18,640
It's such an accident like.
Wow.

439
00:21:19,160 --> 00:21:22,000
Anyway, sorry that took like
quite a turn.

440
00:21:22,240 --> 00:21:24,920
We love the tangents.
Yeah, the tangents, they're

441
00:21:24,920 --> 00:21:25,920
great.
Yeah.

442
00:21:25,920 --> 00:21:29,000
Anyway, so probably I left that
bathroom cleaner than I found

443
00:21:29,000 --> 00:21:30,920
it.
Oh my God, it was so nasty.

444
00:21:31,120 --> 00:21:36,040
Well, and I feel like, I mean,
women are kind of conditioned to

445
00:21:36,040 --> 00:21:41,720
always like be small and leave
no trace and like, you know,

446
00:21:42,360 --> 00:21:47,800
everything has to be all pretty
and neat, whereas like, like you

447
00:21:48,040 --> 00:21:50,360
don't leave your shit stains in
the toilet.

448
00:21:50,360 --> 00:21:53,640
Bowl ever like.
Just I don't know.

449
00:21:53,640 --> 00:21:56,480
Yeah, I mean, this was not like
I skipped cleaning the bathroom

450
00:21:56,480 --> 00:21:58,320
this week.
This is like I skipped cleaning

451
00:21:58,320 --> 00:22:03,320
the bathroom this year.
Yeah, hasn't been done.

452
00:22:03,320 --> 00:22:06,000
And why on earth would you
invite a woman back to your

453
00:22:06,000 --> 00:22:08,680
place knowing the horror show
that is awaiting in your

454
00:22:08,680 --> 00:22:11,800
bathroom?
Or if she was like, I'm going to

455
00:22:11,800 --> 00:22:14,920
use the bathroom, like grab a
Clorox wipe or something, put

456
00:22:14,920 --> 00:22:17,960
bleach in the toilet, something.
But like, do that before you

457
00:22:17,960 --> 00:22:19,360
have somebody over.
Oh my God.

458
00:22:19,360 --> 00:22:20,160
Disgusting.
Yeah.

459
00:22:20,160 --> 00:22:23,960
Like, if there's ever any chance
that you think that could

460
00:22:23,960 --> 00:22:26,400
happen, be prepared.
Right?

461
00:22:26,640 --> 00:22:30,040
I'm assuming that you know.
He knows that a woman, we'll

462
00:22:30,040 --> 00:22:32,720
probably use the bathroom at
some point, or that at least

463
00:22:32,720 --> 00:22:34,800
it's a possibility, right?
My God.

464
00:22:34,840 --> 00:22:36,080
Yeah.
Anyway, so the reason I was

465
00:22:36,080 --> 00:22:39,880
thinking about this week was
because I saw Mr. Hot.

466
00:22:39,880 --> 00:22:40,440
Frost.
Oh my God.

467
00:22:40,440 --> 00:22:42,400
Sorry.
Doctor Hot Frost, Doctor Hot

468
00:22:42,400 --> 00:22:44,520
Frost around town.
Let's give him his full title.

469
00:22:44,520 --> 00:22:46,960
Well, let me tell you these
circumstances surrounding that.

470
00:22:47,160 --> 00:22:51,000
No, as you know, it's been a
week.

471
00:22:51,000 --> 00:22:52,680
It's been a wee week for you, my
friend.

472
00:22:52,760 --> 00:22:55,520
It really has for a couple of
reasons, but I will talk about

473
00:22:55,520 --> 00:22:58,960
just one of them.
Yes, which is that on Wednesday

474
00:22:59,080 --> 00:23:02,800
I felt like I had a piece of
glass stuck in my eye.

475
00:23:03,000 --> 00:23:04,680
That's never nice.
No.

476
00:23:04,680 --> 00:23:08,120
And so I thought I had an
eyelash up there or like maybe a

477
00:23:08,120 --> 00:23:10,840
piece of contact, although I
wasn't missing any contacts or

478
00:23:10,840 --> 00:23:13,040
pieces of contact, but it felt
like a foreign body.

479
00:23:13,080 --> 00:23:15,280
Yes.
And thank goodness this happened

480
00:23:15,280 --> 00:23:17,800
on Wednesday and not Sunday when
I was driving home from

481
00:23:17,800 --> 00:23:19,160
California.
That would have been bad.

482
00:23:19,160 --> 00:23:20,520
That would have been real bad.
Yeah.

483
00:23:21,040 --> 00:23:23,480
Not fun to drive like a drunk
with one eye open.

484
00:23:23,680 --> 00:23:27,520
No, it's not good.
I felt like I had glass in my

485
00:23:27,520 --> 00:23:30,760
eye and when I put my contacts
in it felt better.

486
00:23:30,760 --> 00:23:33,400
So I was like, oh, maybe there's
like a stye or something on the

487
00:23:33,400 --> 00:23:35,600
inside of my eyelid, but I was
looking.

488
00:23:35,600 --> 00:23:38,840
I couldn't see anything.
I mean, granted, I was like, you

489
00:23:38,840 --> 00:23:43,040
know, not that the most visual
acute period of my life, I don't

490
00:23:43,040 --> 00:23:44,520
know.
But finally I went to the

491
00:23:44,520 --> 00:23:50,360
Instacare and the guy looked at
it and he said it was a corneal

492
00:23:50,360 --> 00:23:51,080
ulcer.
Oh.

493
00:23:51,560 --> 00:23:56,120
Yeah, that sounds not pleasant.
No, not pleasant, but most of

494
00:23:56,120 --> 00:24:00,360
the time these heal up within
about a week or so, so I just

495
00:24:00,360 --> 00:24:03,640
can't wear contacts.
Which sucks because yeah, my

496
00:24:03,800 --> 00:24:06,560
adorable dog, you know, My
little dog, you know.

497
00:24:06,640 --> 00:24:09,280
And by little, I mean 80 lbs
pure muscle.

498
00:24:10,440 --> 00:24:14,040
A long time ago, she chewed up
my prescription glasses and it's

499
00:24:14,040 --> 00:24:16,040
been on my To Do List for
literally years.

500
00:24:16,200 --> 00:24:18,680
So this is my like, brokenness,
Yeah.

501
00:24:20,080 --> 00:24:22,200
That that's that's not a big
brokenness.

502
00:24:22,200 --> 00:24:25,280
So you're OK, But I don't have
glasses and I can't wear

503
00:24:25,440 --> 00:24:28,120
contacts, right.
So I went to the Instacare and

504
00:24:28,120 --> 00:24:29,240
he's like, we'll just wear
glasses.

505
00:24:29,240 --> 00:24:31,920
I'm like, I don't have them.
Oops, yeah, oops is right.

506
00:24:31,960 --> 00:24:33,600
He's like, we'll just get some
from the drug store.

507
00:24:33,600 --> 00:24:36,400
And I'm like, I can't.
My prescription is too strong.

508
00:24:36,400 --> 00:24:38,280
Nobody carries them.
Yeah.

509
00:24:38,600 --> 00:24:42,480
So I went to one of those places
that says, you know, we do same

510
00:24:42,480 --> 00:24:44,480
day eyeglasses, right?
So I called them.

511
00:24:44,480 --> 00:24:46,320
I sent them my prescription.
Yeah.

512
00:24:46,600 --> 00:24:49,240
And they were like, yeah, we
can't do it tonight.

513
00:24:49,240 --> 00:24:51,920
But like, you could come down
and, like, get, you know, it

514
00:24:51,920 --> 00:24:54,080
fitted in the whole thing, and
then we can have them tomorrow.

515
00:24:54,120 --> 00:24:56,120
Yeah.
I was like, OK, so I go down

516
00:24:56,120 --> 00:24:58,400
there, they're slammed.
They're understaffed.

517
00:24:58,400 --> 00:25:01,200
I'm waiting and waiting and
waiting and waiting for like

518
00:25:01,560 --> 00:25:02,880
over an hour.
Oh.

519
00:25:03,040 --> 00:25:05,520
And so I'm not feeling good.
I'm not feeling good.

520
00:25:05,600 --> 00:25:07,560
Right.
Like I'm really light sensitive.

521
00:25:07,560 --> 00:25:09,200
It feels like there's glass in
my eye.

522
00:25:09,200 --> 00:25:11,840
Like I have no makeup on.
I can only see out of one eye.

523
00:25:11,920 --> 00:25:14,200
Yeah.
I have like, dye streaked down

524
00:25:14,200 --> 00:25:16,200
my face.
I realized later because they

525
00:25:16,200 --> 00:25:19,000
put, you know, dye in my eyes to
see their injury.

526
00:25:19,000 --> 00:25:21,160
Uh huh.
So I've got dye, like streaked

527
00:25:21,160 --> 00:25:23,320
down my face.
And who should walk in.

528
00:25:23,320 --> 00:25:25,680
Oh, dear God.
But Doctor Hot Frosty, you're

529
00:25:25,760 --> 00:25:29,280
like, I was like, Jesus fucking
like, I haven't seen this guy

530
00:25:29,280 --> 00:25:31,800
for over a year, right?
You haven't seen him since the

531
00:25:31,800 --> 00:25:34,440
bathroom incident?
No, we did see each other since

532
00:25:34,440 --> 00:25:36,600
then I did not go to his house
again, but like I'm.

533
00:25:36,840 --> 00:25:40,080
Not going there.
I'm afraid.

534
00:25:41,360 --> 00:25:44,160
But it's been well over a year
and like things just kind of

535
00:25:44,160 --> 00:25:46,920
like fizzled out as they
sometimes do with people, right?

536
00:25:46,920 --> 00:25:49,160
You just kind of the text
frequency gets less and then at

537
00:25:49,160 --> 00:25:51,440
some point you just stop.
So that was like kind of the

538
00:25:51,440 --> 00:25:53,400
resolution like nothing bad
happened.

539
00:25:53,400 --> 00:25:54,520
Right.
You didn't have any.

540
00:25:54,520 --> 00:25:56,120
Bad feeling.
No, no, no, no.

541
00:25:56,120 --> 00:25:57,440
No.
Bad feelings towards him.

542
00:25:57,440 --> 00:25:59,560
Yeah.
But anyway, he walked in with

543
00:25:59,560 --> 00:26:01,680
one of his kids.
Oh, pick up glasses.

544
00:26:01,680 --> 00:26:03,760
And I was like, Oh my God, this
is not.

545
00:26:05,480 --> 00:26:08,400
Like this is not optimum.
So I know I just, I saw him and

546
00:26:08,400 --> 00:26:09,360
I heard his name.
Yeah.

547
00:26:09,360 --> 00:26:10,000
And.
I was oh.

548
00:26:10,520 --> 00:26:13,640
God, so I just sort of pretended
to be really, really engaged

549
00:26:13,640 --> 00:26:15,760
with my phone.
I'm sure he saw me.

550
00:26:15,760 --> 00:26:17,840
He didn't say hi either.
But I was like, I'm just going

551
00:26:17,840 --> 00:26:20,000
to pretend that Oh my God, I
don't see him.

552
00:26:20,160 --> 00:26:22,840
That's fair.
But Claire, I was tempted to ask

553
00:26:22,840 --> 00:26:25,360
if he cleaned his bathroom since
last.

554
00:26:26,000 --> 00:26:31,760
Year you're like, are you here
with an infection from like some

555
00:26:31,800 --> 00:26:34,880
kind of an eye infection for
like washing your face in your

556
00:26:34,880 --> 00:26:39,520
sink bathroom induced pink eye.
Oh my God, Oh God, I know.

557
00:26:39,520 --> 00:26:41,320
I can only think of like the
towels.

558
00:26:41,840 --> 00:26:43,760
Oh right, I know.
I didn't want to touch.

559
00:26:43,800 --> 00:26:45,480
I was like wiping my hands on my
clothes.

560
00:26:45,480 --> 00:26:47,400
Oh my God.
Like I don't know when these

561
00:26:47,400 --> 00:26:48,960
have been washed, probably
never.

562
00:26:49,040 --> 00:26:51,640
Oh, dear God, yeah.
Wow.

563
00:26:51,920 --> 00:26:54,120
That is an interesting person to
bump into.

564
00:26:54,120 --> 00:26:56,720
And I totally understand why you
just looked at your phone.

565
00:26:56,880 --> 00:26:59,440
Yeah, we, we don't need to say
hi to everybody.

566
00:26:59,640 --> 00:27:01,920
We don't, and especially when I
can only see out of one eye.

567
00:27:01,960 --> 00:27:06,000
Yeah, the other one is broken.
You're just like putting like a

568
00:27:06,040 --> 00:27:09,080
pirate eye.
Oh yeah, no.

569
00:27:09,480 --> 00:27:11,600
Oh my God.
Wow.

570
00:27:11,760 --> 00:27:15,200
Yeah, good times.
Mr. Hot Frosty.

571
00:27:15,600 --> 00:27:18,040
That is a classic name, though.
It's a great name.

572
00:27:18,040 --> 00:27:19,440
It really is.
Yeah.

573
00:27:19,520 --> 00:27:22,720
Like when you text me and you
were like, I saw Hot Frosty.

574
00:27:23,080 --> 00:27:27,720
I was like it just, like, all
flooded back, you know, you, you

575
00:27:27,720 --> 00:27:29,680
forget that you forgot.
And then you're like, oh.

576
00:27:30,480 --> 00:27:32,880
Yes.
Amazing.

577
00:27:33,360 --> 00:27:34,880
I love the nicknames we come up
with.

578
00:27:35,560 --> 00:27:39,160
They're wonderful and I feel
like that's a a pretty universal

579
00:27:39,160 --> 00:27:41,240
thing.
Yeah, that the girlies come up

580
00:27:41,240 --> 00:27:43,800
with the names.
Absolutely the lads.

581
00:27:44,000 --> 00:27:45,520
Do you save them in your phone
like that?

582
00:27:45,560 --> 00:27:46,920
Sometimes I do, sometimes I
don't.

583
00:27:46,960 --> 00:27:50,080
Yeah, I know.
I think I I try to to burn them

584
00:27:50,080 --> 00:27:52,600
to memory, but I know that some
good ones have been forgotten

585
00:27:52,600 --> 00:27:54,000
over.
The years, all right.

586
00:27:54,000 --> 00:27:56,560
Well, no more, because now we
have Olive, we have public

587
00:27:56,560 --> 00:28:00,960
record, yes.
It is written in stone, so to

588
00:28:00,960 --> 00:28:02,040
speak.
Yes.

589
00:28:02,080 --> 00:28:05,600
All right, well, Speaking of
dating disasters, I I know

590
00:28:05,720 --> 00:28:09,720
because while I was on the road,
I received a couple of voice

591
00:28:09,720 --> 00:28:16,400
memos from my lovely Claire
about AI mean, I think disaster

592
00:28:16,400 --> 00:28:18,680
is not too strong a word.
It, it really isn't.

593
00:28:18,680 --> 00:28:23,160
It was, it was like I just, you
couldn't have predicted it.

594
00:28:23,320 --> 00:28:27,080
You couldn't have written it.
It was just no.

595
00:28:27,320 --> 00:28:30,400
Like, no.
So why don't you take us through

596
00:28:30,400 --> 00:28:32,640
it?
And I guess let's preface it

597
00:28:32,640 --> 00:28:34,400
with saying that this was a
second date.

598
00:28:34,520 --> 00:28:37,440
It was, yes.
So I thought I'd done at least

599
00:28:37,440 --> 00:28:40,440
some due diligence.
Yeah, and from the first date he

600
00:28:40,440 --> 00:28:44,560
seemed normal.
He seemed like too normal.

601
00:28:46,400 --> 00:28:49,800
Maybe that's another red flag I
can add to my list.

602
00:28:50,240 --> 00:28:54,760
Well, you know me, I am in in
recent years.

603
00:28:54,920 --> 00:28:59,000
I should have been more pecky
previously, but my pendulum

604
00:28:59,000 --> 00:29:02,080
swung, shall we say, to
completely the other side?

605
00:29:02,080 --> 00:29:06,480
Yes, which my therapist assured
me was understandable, but the

606
00:29:06,480 --> 00:29:08,120
goal was to get it to the
middle.

607
00:29:08,560 --> 00:29:10,240
We're working on that.
We're still working.

608
00:29:10,240 --> 00:29:11,000
It's a work.
In progress.

609
00:29:11,000 --> 00:29:14,800
It's still a wee bit swung high
and it maybe went up a couple of

610
00:29:14,800 --> 00:29:17,720
inches after this deal, yeah.
Yeah.

611
00:29:18,520 --> 00:29:22,960
So as we know from the podcast,
like I really don't do it very

612
00:29:22,960 --> 00:29:29,680
often and I will if I'm on an
app, it's like 1 right for every

613
00:29:29,680 --> 00:29:32,400
probably 200 lefts and I'm not
even joking.

614
00:29:32,600 --> 00:29:34,400
Yeah, or more.
Yeah, I will.

615
00:29:34,400 --> 00:29:37,800
I will be like, I will pick like
the most minor thing and be like

616
00:29:38,520 --> 00:29:43,640
and just go left.
So this guy, we actually talked

617
00:29:43,640 --> 00:29:45,840
about him before.
Oh yeah, he was the one that you

618
00:29:45,840 --> 00:29:49,840
matched with many times, many
times, and then finally, yes,

619
00:29:49,840 --> 00:29:52,640
arranged a date.
I mean, honestly, probably over

620
00:29:52,640 --> 00:29:56,160
the period of like a year, yeah.
We were like back and forth

621
00:29:56,160 --> 00:29:58,480
matching.
So that was the one where I was

622
00:29:58,480 --> 00:30:00,920
like, well, what is different?
And he was like, let's go on a

623
00:30:00,920 --> 00:30:03,480
diet.
So I show up to the first diet.

624
00:30:03,640 --> 00:30:04,760
Yeah.
Because I don't think we ever

625
00:30:04,760 --> 00:30:08,360
talked about that.
It was on a Saturday afternoon,

626
00:30:08,400 --> 00:30:13,320
very low key, and I showed up.
He was there, he was super well

627
00:30:13,320 --> 00:30:15,840
mannered.
He like asked me which chair I

628
00:30:15,840 --> 00:30:18,200
would prefer to sit in like dine
to that detail.

629
00:30:18,200 --> 00:30:20,280
Very nice, I like it when a man
does that.

630
00:30:20,280 --> 00:30:22,960
Some good manners.
Please like really good manners

631
00:30:22,960 --> 00:30:25,400
and I actually wanted his chair
and he moved.

632
00:30:26,200 --> 00:30:27,880
Great.
So that looks lovely.

633
00:30:27,920 --> 00:30:29,960
Yes.
And that sounds like a Dick move

634
00:30:29,960 --> 00:30:32,040
on my part, but I just like to
sit on the end.

635
00:30:32,040 --> 00:30:34,520
No, no, I don't think it's a
Dick move if he asks you for a

636
00:30:34,520 --> 00:30:36,120
preference.
A Dick move would have been

637
00:30:36,120 --> 00:30:39,600
walking in and being like, oh,
hey, I prefer to be here.

638
00:30:39,600 --> 00:30:41,160
You move.
Yeah, right.

639
00:30:41,200 --> 00:30:44,360
But he asked you and you
sedation, right.

640
00:30:44,480 --> 00:30:46,200
So that's.
I love it.

641
00:30:46,200 --> 00:30:48,280
I love it when a man has
manners.

642
00:30:48,600 --> 00:30:51,040
It was cute.
It actually was like a green

643
00:30:51,040 --> 00:30:52,520
flag.
Absolutely.

644
00:30:52,520 --> 00:30:54,040
Yeah.
So it was nice.

645
00:30:54,040 --> 00:31:00,720
And we just had 1 1/2 drinks and
some we nibbles and he was

646
00:31:00,720 --> 00:31:05,080
telling me about his night and
he asked questions like amazing,

647
00:31:05,360 --> 00:31:07,480
amazing.
Like you're just like what?

648
00:31:07,840 --> 00:31:10,600
Like you can ask questions.
So it was very pleasant.

649
00:31:10,600 --> 00:31:13,840
And by the end of the day he
said this was so fun.

650
00:31:13,840 --> 00:31:17,160
I would love to see you again.
Could we do dinner next weekend?

651
00:31:17,480 --> 00:31:21,200
And again, you're like, huh?
Demonstrative.

652
00:31:21,240 --> 00:31:23,440
I love that up front.
We're not playing any weird

653
00:31:23,440 --> 00:31:25,280
games.
Just saying I would love to see

654
00:31:25,280 --> 00:31:27,040
you again and trying to make a
plan.

655
00:31:27,120 --> 00:31:28,880
Yes, that's great.
This all seems like a green

656
00:31:28,880 --> 00:31:32,320
flag.
Right, because I I'm like, did

657
00:31:32,400 --> 00:31:35,600
I, was I delusional?
Like what happened?

658
00:31:36,200 --> 00:31:37,800
Yeah, I don't.
Think so because I talked to you

659
00:31:37,800 --> 00:31:39,720
right after that date and
everything seemed pretty

660
00:31:39,720 --> 00:31:41,480
promising.
It didn't seem like there were

661
00:31:41,480 --> 00:31:44,080
any red flags happening.
And he talked about, like,

662
00:31:44,080 --> 00:31:45,600
getting together with friends
that night.

663
00:31:45,600 --> 00:31:48,040
And we've mentioned that it's
always a green flag when they

664
00:31:48,040 --> 00:31:50,120
seem to interact with other
humans they have.

665
00:31:50,200 --> 00:31:52,360
Of friends, not just the Joe
Rogan.

666
00:31:52,360 --> 00:31:56,320
Podcast yeah, my God.
To keep you safe and warm at

667
00:31:56,320 --> 00:31:58,920
night yeah.
So it it all seemed to be

668
00:31:58,920 --> 00:32:01,880
trending well.
And I text him I think it was

669
00:32:01,880 --> 00:32:05,640
like the next day and was just
like, oh, you know, I'm free

670
00:32:05,640 --> 00:32:07,120
Saturday if you want to grab
dinner.

671
00:32:07,120 --> 00:32:08,720
And he was like, great, let's do
it.

672
00:32:09,240 --> 00:32:13,000
So should have been a red, red
flag.

673
00:32:13,000 --> 00:32:17,000
So the following Saturday comes,
it's like noon and he sends a

674
00:32:17,000 --> 00:32:19,520
text and says, I'm so sorry.
I'm going to have to cancel

675
00:32:19,520 --> 00:32:25,560
dinner because I fell off my
bike and I banged my head and I

676
00:32:25,560 --> 00:32:28,840
think I have my concussion.
It kind of signed it like a

677
00:32:28,840 --> 00:32:32,560
little bit of a made-up story,
if I'm honest.

678
00:32:32,720 --> 00:32:35,160
Yeah, I feel like that's one
that could go either way.

679
00:32:35,160 --> 00:32:37,040
Yeah.
You know, like, that could just

680
00:32:37,040 --> 00:32:40,120
be a whatever, a lie to get out
of the date.

681
00:32:40,120 --> 00:32:43,120
But also one could imagine that
that could be a real thing.

682
00:32:43,120 --> 00:32:45,080
I mean, a lot of people mountain
bike in Salt Lake.

683
00:32:45,480 --> 00:32:47,800
I've had a lot of friends that
have gotten concussions or

684
00:32:47,800 --> 00:32:50,360
broken collarbones or knock
their teeth out mountain biking.

685
00:32:50,360 --> 00:32:52,840
So, like, I wouldn't dismiss
that story.

686
00:32:52,840 --> 00:32:55,920
I can necessarily.
It could be accurate and he also

687
00:32:55,920 --> 00:33:00,760
lives in a well known on Utah
mountain time, shall we say yes.

688
00:33:00,760 --> 00:33:05,280
And so, yeah, like your, your
proximity to biking is very

689
00:33:05,280 --> 00:33:08,080
real.
And yes, so but I remain

690
00:33:08,080 --> 00:33:10,600
skeptical.
Oh, I do too, especially after

691
00:33:10,600 --> 00:33:13,960
the sequel.
But I'm just saying that it it

692
00:33:13,960 --> 00:33:15,080
could be real.
Yeah.

693
00:33:15,720 --> 00:33:18,200
Could be real, Yeah.
I was 5050 on it when he told me

694
00:33:18,200 --> 00:33:18,800
that.
Yeah.

695
00:33:18,800 --> 00:33:22,240
I was like, maybe, maybe not.
I don't know, like let's give

696
00:33:22,240 --> 00:33:24,440
him the benefit of the doubt
because the first date was

697
00:33:24,440 --> 00:33:27,840
pretty good, right?
So it's more like wait and see

698
00:33:27,840 --> 00:33:31,080
if he comes up with a makeup
plan etc etc.

699
00:33:31,080 --> 00:33:36,320
Yeah, and he did, but not
without a little prodding.

700
00:33:36,520 --> 00:33:39,280
OK.
So I was mindful of that.

701
00:33:40,120 --> 00:33:42,560
So we did reschedule for the
following Saturday.

702
00:33:42,560 --> 00:33:44,600
I wasn't like super planning on
it.

703
00:33:44,600 --> 00:33:46,440
I was just like, right, if it
happens, it doesn't.

704
00:33:46,440 --> 00:33:48,960
And I, I believe I text you that
afternoon.

705
00:33:49,040 --> 00:33:51,160
It was a bad, I sound like I've
been drinking.

706
00:33:51,560 --> 00:33:54,520
I believe that I text you that
very afternoon and was like, oh,

707
00:33:54,520 --> 00:33:57,040
I don't like, I'd much rather be
hanging out with you tonight

708
00:33:57,040 --> 00:33:59,720
and.
You did, and I felt kind of bad

709
00:33:59,720 --> 00:34:02,080
because I encouraged you.
I kind of hyped you up a little.

710
00:34:02,080 --> 00:34:03,840
I was like, no, you should go on
the date.

711
00:34:03,840 --> 00:34:06,000
The first one was good.
Like just see what happens.

712
00:34:06,000 --> 00:34:08,320
Like, give it a shot.
That was the right thing.

713
00:34:08,360 --> 00:34:11,320
To do I formally apologize to
you, my friend?

714
00:34:11,880 --> 00:34:13,679
Oh girl.
None of this was your fault,

715
00:34:14,120 --> 00:34:17,639
even close, but it was it was
some good like foreshadowing

716
00:34:17,639 --> 00:34:21,360
because you were like, look,
it's your favorite restaurant.

717
00:34:21,360 --> 00:34:24,760
At very least, just go enjoy a
really good meal and a good

718
00:34:24,760 --> 00:34:28,239
drink.
And and just that's that can be

719
00:34:28,239 --> 00:34:29,360
the good part.
Of the night.

720
00:34:29,440 --> 00:34:31,560
And return and report, return
and report.

721
00:34:31,800 --> 00:34:34,400
So that was my focus was on the
good meal.

722
00:34:34,440 --> 00:34:36,880
And I am going to give a shout
out to the restaurant.

723
00:34:37,000 --> 00:34:39,719
Yes, Arlo, we mentioned it
before, we love Arlo.

724
00:34:39,840 --> 00:34:42,360
I love Arlo even more.
Nigh I.

725
00:34:42,360 --> 00:34:44,320
Know you didn't think it was
possible, but.

726
00:34:44,320 --> 00:34:48,440
I did not think it was possible
because I love it and also their

727
00:34:48,440 --> 00:34:52,280
staff are amazing.
Yeah, major shout out to my boy

728
00:34:52,280 --> 00:34:53,880
Darren, but we'll get more to
him.

729
00:34:53,880 --> 00:34:57,000
OK, we'll get to Darren.
Big Darren fans here.

730
00:34:57,040 --> 00:34:59,680
We love you, Darren.
So yeah.

731
00:34:59,800 --> 00:35:04,040
So I get to the restaurant, the
diet is proceeding.

732
00:35:04,480 --> 00:35:06,640
He texts me.
And he was like, I'm really

733
00:35:06,640 --> 00:35:09,800
early.
And I was like, oh wow, eager,

734
00:35:09,960 --> 00:35:12,040
but like, I mean like 20
minutes.

735
00:35:13,000 --> 00:35:15,640
Yes, real early.
Like I was just leaving the

736
00:35:15,640 --> 00:35:17,200
house.
OK, all right.

737
00:35:17,200 --> 00:35:20,720
Not necessarily a red flag.
No, I felt a little flustered

738
00:35:20,720 --> 00:35:22,400
though, because I was like, oh
God, he's sitting there.

739
00:35:22,400 --> 00:35:25,240
And then I had to remind myself
that no, we had a plan and I

740
00:35:25,280 --> 00:35:27,320
would be there when we.
Said I'm not late.

741
00:35:27,320 --> 00:35:29,600
Yeah, yeah.
I mean, I I was a little bit

742
00:35:29,600 --> 00:35:32,560
but.
Probably like 5 minutes.

743
00:35:32,720 --> 00:35:35,120
So yeah, it was.
That wasn't fine and.

744
00:35:35,120 --> 00:35:37,760
Also, like I, yeah, it should
have been 1/2 hour that night,

745
00:35:37,840 --> 00:35:40,880
but I got there.
And if you've ever walked into

746
00:35:40,880 --> 00:35:46,040
Arlo, it's a beautiful building,
has a lovely setup and, you

747
00:35:46,040 --> 00:35:49,080
know, little outdoor patio.
And in their me and dining room,

748
00:35:49,080 --> 00:35:51,960
they actually have like this
lovely little bar you can sit

749
00:35:51,960 --> 00:35:53,640
out where you overlook the
kitchen.

750
00:35:53,720 --> 00:35:55,560
I love that.
It's so cute.

751
00:35:55,560 --> 00:35:57,760
That's actually my favorite.
I think we might have said this

752
00:35:57,760 --> 00:36:00,840
before, but if I'm just with one
person, I would always rather

753
00:36:00,840 --> 00:36:01,800
sit at the bar.
Yeah.

754
00:36:01,800 --> 00:36:03,480
It's just like a more
interesting interactive

755
00:36:03,480 --> 00:36:04,360
experience.
Yes.

756
00:36:04,360 --> 00:36:06,600
And then particularly if you
have like that open chef's

757
00:36:06,600 --> 00:36:08,680
kitchen.
That by far is my preference.

758
00:36:08,880 --> 00:36:13,680
100% especially somewhere like
that where it's also like fresh

759
00:36:13,720 --> 00:36:17,840
and you know, they're making the
re bread and like, yeah, it's

760
00:36:17,920 --> 00:36:21,040
it's lovely.
So when you go in and check in

761
00:36:21,040 --> 00:36:24,560
at the desk they have in the
corner, it's AI would call it a

762
00:36:24,560 --> 00:36:28,200
station.
It's a station where they make

763
00:36:28,200 --> 00:36:30,160
drinks.
It's not a bar, it's a station.

764
00:36:30,160 --> 00:36:33,040
Interesting yes.
It's not supposed to be part of

765
00:36:33,040 --> 00:36:35,240
the experience.
In fact, I think it's

766
00:36:35,240 --> 00:36:39,320
intentionally and sort of like
another bit of the restaurant so

767
00:36:39,320 --> 00:36:41,400
that the focus is on the food
and the cooking.

768
00:36:41,840 --> 00:36:44,680
And I get in and he's sitting
there at the station.

769
00:36:44,680 --> 00:36:47,960
At the station, Not the bar, not
the bar, OK, It's the station.

770
00:36:48,400 --> 00:36:52,360
And he was like, oh, hi.
I thought we had sit here.

771
00:36:52,440 --> 00:36:57,040
And I was like, why?
At the bar station, it seems

772
00:36:57,040 --> 00:37:00,080
kind of awkward.
It's like. 4 foot long, yeah,

773
00:37:00,080 --> 00:37:03,440
it's a very small area and I was
like, oh, I guess we're having a

774
00:37:03,440 --> 00:37:06,360
date with the barman tonight.
Then it's a threesome.

775
00:37:06,360 --> 00:37:08,160
It's a threesome because there
was.

776
00:37:08,160 --> 00:37:11,040
No way.
He was not hearing every word of

777
00:37:11,080 --> 00:37:13,920
our Yeah, he's like right there.
He was right there.

778
00:37:13,920 --> 00:37:16,560
It's not like a big bar where
like they're moving around.

779
00:37:16,560 --> 00:37:18,840
Like at most they're like
getting a snippet of your

780
00:37:18,840 --> 00:37:21,280
conversation.
No, we were like 3 feet.

781
00:37:21,320 --> 00:37:23,240
So from each other.
It's like a three-way at this

782
00:37:23,240 --> 00:37:24,280
point.
It's like a three-way.

783
00:37:24,280 --> 00:37:26,440
OK, perfect.
I was like, OK, maybe he's into

784
00:37:26,480 --> 00:37:27,560
it.
I don't.

785
00:37:27,560 --> 00:37:32,480
Know, but let's go.
So it just felt awkward.

786
00:37:32,880 --> 00:37:34,600
Oh yeah, that's awkward right
away.

787
00:37:35,200 --> 00:37:40,080
And he stood up to hug me and
literally fell into me and give

788
00:37:40,080 --> 00:37:43,400
me like a really slobbery like
cheek kiss.

789
00:37:43,400 --> 00:37:46,120
But it was not hot.
It was not.

790
00:37:46,120 --> 00:37:50,120
So he didn't.
It sounds like he was already,

791
00:37:51,440 --> 00:37:53,000
shall we say he'd been pre
gaming.

792
00:37:53,160 --> 00:37:58,880
He had been pre gaming quite
substantially, which was ironic

793
00:37:58,880 --> 00:38:01,400
given what was to unfold.
Literally.

794
00:38:01,920 --> 00:38:04,440
OK so little tip for all our
salty Bros.

795
00:38:04,440 --> 00:38:06,960
I'm sure if you're a salty bro
you know already, Don't show up

796
00:38:06,960 --> 00:38:08,560
drunk to a date.
It's not hot.

797
00:38:08,600 --> 00:38:09,680
It's really not.
Hot.

798
00:38:09,680 --> 00:38:11,600
Because you might not think
you're being sloppy.

799
00:38:11,600 --> 00:38:13,560
You're being very sloppy.
Yeah.

800
00:38:13,600 --> 00:38:16,680
It's not good.
So he's sloppy from the jump.

801
00:38:16,920 --> 00:38:21,920
And can I point out that RT, it
was at 6:30 PM, it was.

802
00:38:21,920 --> 00:38:25,320
It wasn't even like a late
dinner at 9:30, it was 6. 30 I

803
00:38:25,320 --> 00:38:29,640
mean, even a late dinner at 9:30
if I mean maybe if you'd had a

804
00:38:29,640 --> 00:38:33,400
drink, fine, but like to already
be tripping and like slobbering

805
00:38:33,400 --> 00:38:36,120
on you sloppy, yes.
Yeah.

806
00:38:36,280 --> 00:38:39,160
Yeah.
So back to the earlier point

807
00:38:39,160 --> 00:38:42,120
where maybe I should work on
knowing when to leave.

808
00:38:45,160 --> 00:38:47,600
Maybe I should have just stepped
out at that moment.

809
00:38:47,600 --> 00:38:51,040
So the the conversation is
weird, awkward.

810
00:38:51,240 --> 00:38:53,320
He asked me what kind of wine
that I liked.

811
00:38:53,320 --> 00:38:54,640
He said I'm going to bring a
bottle.

812
00:38:54,640 --> 00:38:55,960
And I was like, why are you
doing that?

813
00:38:55,960 --> 00:38:59,040
Like I don't, but fine, you
know.

814
00:38:59,040 --> 00:39:02,720
Okay.
So I told him I love whites and

815
00:39:03,600 --> 00:39:07,960
bubbles and.
But Reds are kind of bad for me.

816
00:39:07,960 --> 00:39:11,280
I get like a wee headache.
And So what did he bring?

817
00:39:11,480 --> 00:39:12,920
A red?
Yeah.

818
00:39:13,760 --> 00:39:15,680
But he was like, oh, but it's a
very mild red.

819
00:39:15,760 --> 00:39:19,400
I was like, it's.
So red Yeah, way to not listen.

820
00:39:19,400 --> 00:39:20,640
Yep.
And then he goes on to tell me

821
00:39:20,640 --> 00:39:23,320
about how expensive it is and,
oh, gross.

822
00:39:23,560 --> 00:39:26,880
And then he went on to tell me
that he got it at this vineyard

823
00:39:26,880 --> 00:39:30,400
with his former partner, and it
was a beautiful experience.

824
00:39:30,400 --> 00:39:33,000
And I was like, well, that's an
interesting story to lead with.

825
00:39:33,720 --> 00:39:36,120
Yeah.
Yeah, but also, like you clearly

826
00:39:36,120 --> 00:39:38,000
said, not a red, please.
Yeah.

827
00:39:38,320 --> 00:39:41,720
And he showed up with the red.
He did indeed, which is really

828
00:39:41,720 --> 00:39:43,800
weird.
And honestly, bringing a wine, a

829
00:39:43,800 --> 00:39:47,840
bottle of wine to a restaurant,
that's not a like, a red flag to

830
00:39:47,840 --> 00:39:48,840
me.
Like if you have a really

831
00:39:48,840 --> 00:39:51,120
special bottle, right.
Like, and you want to pay the

832
00:39:51,120 --> 00:39:54,320
corkage, like, cool.
Like, that's great.

833
00:39:54,320 --> 00:39:57,760
But like if you don't really
have a plan or like a special

834
00:39:57,760 --> 00:40:02,240
bottle, I mean why not just
drink with the restaurant has

835
00:40:02,640 --> 00:40:05,560
available, right?
And, and you're sort of

836
00:40:05,560 --> 00:40:08,760
committed to like a full bottle
of wine at that point, too.

837
00:40:08,960 --> 00:40:11,960
Sure, although between two
people that's 2 1/2 glasses,

838
00:40:11,960 --> 00:40:16,120
which if one had not pregame
substantially, would be a

839
00:40:16,280 --> 00:40:19,040
reasonable amount of alcohol.
Like, that's not too weird,

840
00:40:19,040 --> 00:40:21,440
right?
But given that he'd already had

841
00:40:21,440 --> 00:40:24,200
it sounds like several drinks in
advance, then yeah, maybe the

842
00:40:24,200 --> 00:40:28,240
full bottle of wine wasn't the
best choice and the best choice

843
00:40:28,280 --> 00:40:29,560
also.
Actually, no, I do.

844
00:40:29,800 --> 00:40:32,120
This is a little weird.
I wouldn't do corkage if I were

845
00:40:32,120 --> 00:40:34,080
sitting at a bar station.
Yeah.

846
00:40:34,400 --> 00:40:36,560
That's a little odd.
Yes, it was.

847
00:40:36,600 --> 00:40:37,840
Everything was just.
Odd.

848
00:40:37,840 --> 00:40:40,600
Yeah, really odd we were.
Collecting oddities.

849
00:40:40,600 --> 00:40:44,360
Yeah, okay.
Just like pin butterflies,

850
00:40:44,560 --> 00:40:45,960
right?
Because you would think one of

851
00:40:45,960 --> 00:40:49,080
the perks of sitting in that
proximity to the barman would be

852
00:40:49,080 --> 00:40:52,400
to be like, oh, tell me about
this or what pairs well with

853
00:40:52,400 --> 00:40:55,480
this dish or.
Yeah, or maybe like, why don't

854
00:40:55,480 --> 00:40:57,680
you make me a cocktail off the
menu?

855
00:40:57,680 --> 00:41:00,960
Like I like bourbon and this or
whatever you like.

856
00:41:01,000 --> 00:41:04,120
You know, that's kind of the
perk of sitting at the bar

857
00:41:04,120 --> 00:41:04,920
station.
Could be.

858
00:41:04,920 --> 00:41:08,000
Fun.
Sounds really fun and I, you and

859
00:41:08,000 --> 00:41:09,720
I need to go do this together,
yes?

860
00:41:09,720 --> 00:41:13,320
We need to return and sit with
Darren at the bar.

861
00:41:13,400 --> 00:41:15,240
Would you like to have a
threesome with me and Darren?

862
00:41:18,280 --> 00:41:20,960
Well, a chaste threesome, not a
sexual threesome.

863
00:41:20,960 --> 00:41:22,560
Yes, just sitting at the bar
station.

864
00:41:22,560 --> 00:41:24,400
Yes, sorry, I was going the
other direction.

865
00:41:24,400 --> 00:41:26,320
It would probably be an
affirmative for both, but

866
00:41:26,320 --> 00:41:29,800
anyway, moving on.
OK, sorry, Darren.

867
00:41:30,480 --> 00:41:32,760
Yes, so all.
Right, so we have a full bottle

868
00:41:32,760 --> 00:41:34,520
of wine that you do not want and
can't really.

869
00:41:34,520 --> 00:41:36,120
Drink without getting a
headache, Noel.

870
00:41:36,520 --> 00:41:41,160
And I also have like, I'm
feeling bad because I am like,

871
00:41:41,840 --> 00:41:46,280
this poor man is here to do a
job and we are here and that's

872
00:41:46,280 --> 00:41:49,400
he, he's probably feeling like
some kind of pressure that we're

873
00:41:49,400 --> 00:41:53,120
sitting there and dude kept
asking stupid ass questions.

874
00:41:53,240 --> 00:41:55,640
Oh no, Trying to be like a
connoisseur.

875
00:41:55,640 --> 00:41:56,840
Trying to show off.
Yes.

876
00:41:56,920 --> 00:41:58,720
And I'm like, stop talking to
him.

877
00:41:58,720 --> 00:42:00,200
That's so not.
He is working.

878
00:42:00,280 --> 00:42:01,680
Yeah.
Like people are bringing him

879
00:42:01,680 --> 00:42:03,600
orders.
Stop talking.

880
00:42:03,760 --> 00:42:05,400
There's one person here.
Yeah.

881
00:42:05,600 --> 00:42:08,600
And so he puts on a wee blender
to make a drink and he's like, I

882
00:42:08,600 --> 00:42:12,120
am so sorry for the noise.
And I just said, oh, dude, we

883
00:42:12,120 --> 00:42:14,880
are in your space.
Like you do not make all the the

884
00:42:14,880 --> 00:42:17,440
noise you need.
And that's where I was like, Oh

885
00:42:17,440 --> 00:42:20,400
my God, this is so terrible.
Like he's conscious of this

886
00:42:20,400 --> 00:42:22,880
because he's lovely and.
Yeah, so uncomfortable.

887
00:42:22,920 --> 00:42:29,160
Yes, so I, I know somebody else
who works there, a wonderful

888
00:42:29,160 --> 00:42:32,400
server.
And I, I asked, I was like, oh,

889
00:42:32,400 --> 00:42:35,360
does he still work here?
And he said he did.

890
00:42:35,360 --> 00:42:38,960
So they're just so lovely.
They're this has happened to me

891
00:42:38,960 --> 00:42:41,960
there before as well when the
server that I know is there and

892
00:42:41,960 --> 00:42:45,400
they're just like, here is a a
gift from the kitchen and they

893
00:42:45,400 --> 00:42:48,080
bring you like a wee bread or
they bought us this lovely

894
00:42:48,080 --> 00:42:51,200
chicory salad.
And you're like, that's, that is

895
00:42:51,240 --> 00:42:53,880
literally so cute.
Like, not a lot of restaurants.

896
00:42:53,880 --> 00:42:55,640
Do that.
Well, not in Utah.

897
00:42:55,640 --> 00:42:59,360
So, yeah, it's one of the few
places in Utah that understands

898
00:42:59,360 --> 00:43:01,400
good service.
It's very rare in this state.

899
00:43:01,400 --> 00:43:03,760
Yes, to send like a little treat
from the kitchen.

900
00:43:03,840 --> 00:43:06,080
And it's just one of the reasons
I love it.

901
00:43:06,480 --> 00:43:08,880
And so, you know, when you just
want a little piece of

902
00:43:08,880 --> 00:43:12,680
everything on your fork because
you're just like, like I, there

903
00:43:12,680 --> 00:43:15,200
are so many food chasms to be
had at that place.

904
00:43:15,320 --> 00:43:18,040
Like the food is so fresh and
good and yummy.

905
00:43:18,360 --> 00:43:21,600
So I'm like trying to get it.
And dude, I thought he was being

906
00:43:21,600 --> 00:43:23,960
cute.
He's literally like stabbing

907
00:43:24,000 --> 00:43:27,560
like fork wars.
Wait, he's stabbing your fork

908
00:43:27,560 --> 00:43:28,200
with.
Yes.

909
00:43:28,200 --> 00:43:30,960
Like I couldn't get the pieces
on my fork.

910
00:43:31,600 --> 00:43:35,520
And I looked at him to be like
expecting little smile or yeah,

911
00:43:35,840 --> 00:43:39,120
but no, there wasn't.
He was just really intoxicated.

912
00:43:40,960 --> 00:43:44,760
So I got like half a mouthful of
the delightful chicory salad.

913
00:43:45,120 --> 00:43:46,200
Yeah.
Wow.

914
00:43:46,240 --> 00:43:48,400
And he was just like eating like
an animal.

915
00:43:48,600 --> 00:43:50,200
Oh my God.
Yes.

916
00:43:50,480 --> 00:43:53,560
So at that point I am like, Oh
my God, we're looking at the

917
00:43:53,560 --> 00:43:55,000
menu.
The words weren't even like,

918
00:43:55,000 --> 00:43:57,480
penetrating my brain at that
point.

919
00:43:57,480 --> 00:44:01,120
I was like, and he was like,
let's just share stuff.

920
00:44:01,120 --> 00:44:03,440
And I was like, oh, we could
maybe get our own meal.

921
00:44:06,680 --> 00:44:09,560
Put the fork down, Sir.
Yes, and step away from the bar

922
00:44:09,560 --> 00:44:11,640
station.
I want my own plate and

923
00:44:11,640 --> 00:44:14,080
preferably you to leave.
So yes.

924
00:44:14,280 --> 00:44:17,320
So we order.
I need to speed this up because

925
00:44:17,320 --> 00:44:18,920
I will take hours.
No, no, no.

926
00:44:18,920 --> 00:44:20,560
We have time.
You keep talking, my God.

927
00:44:21,200 --> 00:44:25,720
There's just so much detail.
So he orders two things from the

928
00:44:25,720 --> 00:44:28,480
menu himself for us to.
Share I see.

929
00:44:28,480 --> 00:44:29,920
OK.
So we orders.

930
00:44:29,920 --> 00:44:32,520
Oh, so again, he's not
respecting your wishes?

931
00:44:32,520 --> 00:44:38,640
No, OK, he orders and you're
like, OK, he orders the sea bass

932
00:44:38,680 --> 00:44:42,520
and the I struggle with how to
say this in America.

933
00:44:42,520 --> 00:44:44,160
The risotto.
Risotto.

934
00:44:44,160 --> 00:44:45,680
Yeah, yeah.
Perfect that.

935
00:44:46,320 --> 00:44:49,560
It was like a nice mushroom
risotto situation.

936
00:44:49,560 --> 00:44:50,240
Sounds.
Delicious.

937
00:44:50,240 --> 00:44:51,880
I'm like, OK, I'm excited for
the food.

938
00:44:52,840 --> 00:44:56,080
If I'm allowed to eat it.
Right, beautiful presentation,

939
00:44:56,080 --> 00:45:00,680
like lovely and then Mr. Animal.
Oh God, like.

940
00:45:01,000 --> 00:45:04,000
Oh my God, they brought us 2
little plates we're gonna serve

941
00:45:04,000 --> 00:45:09,640
from the dishes and he gets
stuck in there and when I tell

942
00:45:09,640 --> 00:45:15,440
you there was food on his lap,
there was food on the floor.

943
00:45:15,680 --> 00:45:18,720
No.
There were sauces up his arms.

944
00:45:19,040 --> 00:45:21,080
Oh, no, like up his arms.
Oh.

945
00:45:21,160 --> 00:45:24,400
My God dude was trashed.
He was trashed at this point.

946
00:45:24,800 --> 00:45:27,680
And you know how when your kids
were toddlers and you would go

947
00:45:27,680 --> 00:45:29,960
out to eat and if they were
trying to take something from a

948
00:45:29,960 --> 00:45:33,240
bowl, you'd secure the bowl so
the bowl didn't end up on their

949
00:45:33,240 --> 00:45:36,240
lap or the floor?
Yes, I had to secure the bowl.

950
00:45:36,240 --> 00:45:37,040
Oh.
My God.

951
00:45:37,040 --> 00:45:39,680
It was a bite to be on the.
Floor yeah, I mean, that

952
00:45:39,680 --> 00:45:42,760
literally took me back to eating
with my son when he was little

953
00:45:42,760 --> 00:45:46,480
like little little when you do
your best to like keep

954
00:45:46,480 --> 00:45:49,200
everything contained and then at
the end of the meal you're like,

955
00:45:49,200 --> 00:45:52,480
here's a 50% tip for what you
had to deal with I'm.

956
00:45:52,600 --> 00:45:56,120
So sorry, but you know I'm
trying to teach this little

957
00:45:56,120 --> 00:46:00,160
human right how to use utensils
exactly which you know.

958
00:46:00,160 --> 00:46:02,640
And people are understanding,
especially if you tip

959
00:46:02,640 --> 00:46:06,440
appropriately. 100% this is a
grown ass man.

960
00:46:06,440 --> 00:46:10,440
Yes, who made the choice to get
fucked up before coming on a

961
00:46:10,440 --> 00:46:11,560
date?
Yep.

962
00:46:11,640 --> 00:46:13,960
Wow.
So I'm mostly just trying to

963
00:46:13,960 --> 00:46:18,000
control the fall light at this
point, and actually in hindsight

964
00:46:18,080 --> 00:46:21,920
I don't even know if I.
Tasted the sea bass no.

965
00:46:21,920 --> 00:46:26,800
I got some rice or some risotto.
I had a few grains of rights.

966
00:46:27,280 --> 00:46:32,000
Were you dying of mortification?
Oh my God, just second hand

967
00:46:32,000 --> 00:46:34,520
embarrassment of being seen with
this person.

968
00:46:34,560 --> 00:46:37,280
Like I felt like I had to
apologize even though this was a

969
00:46:37,280 --> 00:46:40,080
second date.
Yeah, I mean, of course you

970
00:46:40,080 --> 00:46:42,400
would feel that, right?
Because it's not your fault, but

971
00:46:42,400 --> 00:46:45,480
it's also definitely not the
server or the bartender's fault

972
00:46:45,480 --> 00:46:48,320
that like this man is making a
toddler sized mess all over the

973
00:46:48,320 --> 00:46:50,640
restaurant floor.
Of an area where you shouldn't

974
00:46:50,640 --> 00:46:52,920
even be eating.
I know that's so weird.

975
00:46:52,920 --> 00:46:55,720
Like I was just like, oh God,
make it stop, stop.

976
00:46:55,720 --> 00:46:59,040
Like and you know, I'm thinking
about what take out am I going

977
00:46:59,040 --> 00:47:00,560
to get on the way home at this
point?

978
00:47:00,560 --> 00:47:02,080
That's right.
Where's the nearest Taco Bell?

979
00:47:02,080 --> 00:47:07,240
Drive you because I'm like I'm
starving like this is crazy and

980
00:47:07,360 --> 00:47:10,280
I was like so much for the hopes
of a good meal and a nice drink.

981
00:47:10,560 --> 00:47:14,000
So this is happening.
I'm just looking at him and at

982
00:47:14,000 --> 00:47:16,920
this point I'm like Oh yeah,
this is this is done like

983
00:47:16,920 --> 00:47:18,920
discussed.
There will be no third day like

984
00:47:18,920 --> 00:47:20,320
make it stop.
Of course.

985
00:47:20,680 --> 00:47:25,520
So he, the barman had been so
lovely on cork, the wine, like

986
00:47:25,520 --> 00:47:30,040
port us both like a very
reasonable mind that you would

987
00:47:30,040 --> 00:47:33,960
be drinking with a meal.
And so I'm, like, sipping my red

988
00:47:33,960 --> 00:47:36,480
wine, like, barely.
Yeah.

989
00:47:36,760 --> 00:47:40,920
Taking my ibuprofen in
preparation, like, you know,

990
00:47:40,920 --> 00:47:45,000
water, lots of water.
Dude is Downing the red wine,

991
00:47:45,160 --> 00:47:46,000
chugging.
Yeah.

992
00:47:46,320 --> 00:47:49,240
And so, I mean, the barman had
it set up all lovely where he

993
00:47:49,240 --> 00:47:51,200
was just going to top off the
glasses.

994
00:47:51,400 --> 00:47:57,200
He lifts it from behind the
station oars like to the brim

995
00:47:57,400 --> 00:47:59,280
00.
Yikes.

996
00:47:59,360 --> 00:48:01,880
Yeah, Yikes.
It puts it back down and I'm

997
00:48:01,880 --> 00:48:06,120
like awesome Bar man immediately
lifts the bottle to pour some in

998
00:48:06,120 --> 00:48:08,080
mind, but he's like got it
upside down.

999
00:48:08,080 --> 00:48:09,560
It's like drips.
Oh.

1000
00:48:10,200 --> 00:48:12,360
My God yes.
Yep.

1001
00:48:12,720 --> 00:48:16,680
Wow.
So he decides to go pee at this

1002
00:48:16,680 --> 00:48:19,200
point, which is understandable
because I'm sure his bladder is

1003
00:48:19,200 --> 00:48:21,440
exploding.
Because he saw the alcohol he

1004
00:48:21,440 --> 00:48:23,440
drinks before the date and on
the date.

1005
00:48:24,640 --> 00:48:28,920
So he goes to the bathroom and I
just look at the barman and I he

1006
00:48:28,920 --> 00:48:32,680
looks at me and I was like oh
thank God he is noticing too.

1007
00:48:33,600 --> 00:48:35,360
And I was just like what the
fuck?

1008
00:48:35,360 --> 00:48:43,120
And he was like Oh my God.
I was like I'm not imagining

1009
00:48:43,120 --> 00:48:45,360
this right?
And he was like Oh my God, I'm

1010
00:48:45,360 --> 00:48:47,520
so sorry.
He was like is this a first

1011
00:48:47,520 --> 00:48:49,880
date?
And I was like a second and he

1012
00:48:49,920 --> 00:48:52,440
was like, Oh my God.
Like.

1013
00:48:53,040 --> 00:48:57,120
And he said he had three drinks
before I arrived.

1014
00:48:58,120 --> 00:49:00,360
Yeah.
And I wonder if you had more

1015
00:49:00,360 --> 00:49:03,400
before?
Right showed up yes, he he Uber

1016
00:49:03,400 --> 00:49:06,960
dine from you know, he lived
about 25 minutes away.

1017
00:49:06,960 --> 00:49:10,400
So and he had a little bag with
him with like the wine and a

1018
00:49:10,400 --> 00:49:13,520
water bottle.
So filled with vodka, man,

1019
00:49:13,520 --> 00:49:16,680
right?
And so, yeah, he goes to the the

1020
00:49:16,680 --> 00:49:18,760
restroom and I was just like, Oh
my God.

1021
00:49:19,160 --> 00:49:22,360
And I, I was like, I think we
need to cut dude off.

1022
00:49:22,360 --> 00:49:26,200
So I lifted his wine glass and
poured some into my not because

1023
00:49:26,200 --> 00:49:29,600
I wanted it, but just to slow
his flow a little.

1024
00:49:29,600 --> 00:49:31,160
Yeah, sequester it away from
him.

1025
00:49:31,960 --> 00:49:34,440
And honestly, at that point, I
should have just went out the

1026
00:49:34,440 --> 00:49:37,320
door and left.
Yeah, again, we're learning.

1027
00:49:37,600 --> 00:49:39,320
So hopefully there won't be a
next time.

1028
00:49:40,120 --> 00:49:44,760
So he comes back and he, you
know, it's like time to pay for

1029
00:49:44,760 --> 00:49:45,640
the food.
And I am.

1030
00:49:45,680 --> 00:49:50,480
I will offer to split 5050, but
in that occasion, no.

1031
00:49:50,480 --> 00:49:51,800
No.
Absolutely not.

1032
00:49:51,800 --> 00:49:55,520
I had like 5 grains of rice.
Yeah, and a tiny bit of wine you

1033
00:49:55,520 --> 00:49:59,000
didn't want in the first place.
That was a ball he brought, so I

1034
00:49:59,040 --> 00:50:00,320
was like, yeah, I'm not gonna
know.

1035
00:50:00,400 --> 00:50:03,040
This dude was wearing half the.
Food.

1036
00:50:03,840 --> 00:50:06,360
The other half was on the floor
at the bar station.

1037
00:50:06,640 --> 00:50:11,240
And again, showed out to Mr.
Darren, Who so masterfully

1038
00:50:11,400 --> 00:50:15,160
swooped in multiple times with a
cloth to just kind of like

1039
00:50:15,160 --> 00:50:18,560
discreetly scoop it.
Like we were at the scooping

1040
00:50:18,560 --> 00:50:22,280
level.
It wasn't just a wee bit.

1041
00:50:23,120 --> 00:50:26,320
So he was clearing off this
station where he had to perform

1042
00:50:26,320 --> 00:50:30,160
his job.
Darren, he's a real 1.

1043
00:50:30,560 --> 00:50:33,520
So Mr. Miles, like, yeah, I got
it.

1044
00:50:33,520 --> 00:50:34,680
I got it.
I was like, yeah.

1045
00:50:34,800 --> 00:50:35,760
You do.
Yeah, you do.

1046
00:50:35,760 --> 00:50:38,240
I'm not paying for that.
Yeah, so weirdo website the

1047
00:50:38,240 --> 00:50:40,360
card.
And then he was like, you know,

1048
00:50:41,120 --> 00:50:43,320
I, I would, I need to give you
extra.

1049
00:50:43,320 --> 00:50:45,880
And the barman was like, that's
not necessary.

1050
00:50:45,880 --> 00:50:48,440
Like you're fine with a tip
here.

1051
00:50:48,440 --> 00:50:52,320
And he's like, no, but like you
let us stay here and I would

1052
00:50:52,320 --> 00:50:55,720
just feel better about it and
all this kind of stuff.

1053
00:50:55,720 --> 00:50:59,520
And so he give him his Venmo And
I said, Oh, I'd love to send you

1054
00:50:59,520 --> 00:51:01,480
something too.
And he, he said, oh, you don't

1055
00:51:01,480 --> 00:51:07,320
have to.
And I was like, well, I would

1056
00:51:07,320 --> 00:51:11,400
like to you because you have,
you know, this has made this

1057
00:51:11,400 --> 00:51:12,400
tolerable.
Yeah.

1058
00:51:12,440 --> 00:51:14,080
You've slightly saved the
evening.

1059
00:51:14,600 --> 00:51:18,040
Yes, I'm in a very nice move.
He said, how about I just write

1060
00:51:18,040 --> 00:51:20,080
my number, darn for you in case
you need it.

1061
00:51:20,480 --> 00:51:25,040
And I was like, yeah, so nice.
And yeah, cuz I'm sure he didn't

1062
00:51:25,040 --> 00:51:27,080
anticipate how this was going to
wrap up at the end.

1063
00:51:27,080 --> 00:51:29,560
So that was very sweet of him to
do that.

1064
00:51:30,360 --> 00:51:34,240
And so I'm just like, OK, thank
God we're on the home straight.

1065
00:51:34,560 --> 00:51:36,160
I'm going to go home.
Yeah.

1066
00:51:37,520 --> 00:51:39,280
Oh no then.
Oh, no.

1067
00:51:39,480 --> 00:51:41,200
Oh, no, There's more.
There's more.

1068
00:51:42,120 --> 00:51:43,760
As if this couldn't get any
worse.

1069
00:51:43,800 --> 00:51:45,560
Yeah, but it can.
But it.

1070
00:51:45,560 --> 00:51:48,640
Can so I just want to point out
that Mister Manns, I mean, maybe

1071
00:51:48,640 --> 00:51:55,000
this is my draw to entrepreneurs
in scare quotes, but yes, he

1072
00:51:55,000 --> 00:51:57,240
said.
So I've something to tell you

1073
00:51:57,240 --> 00:51:59,640
and you're probably never going
to want to see me again.

1074
00:51:59,720 --> 00:52:00,920
You're like, no.
I'm already there, man.

1075
00:52:01,040 --> 00:52:02,360
Yeah, we're good.
Don't worry about it.

1076
00:52:02,360 --> 00:52:03,840
Solidify.
Don't worry about it.

1077
00:52:03,960 --> 00:52:05,000
Yes.
Will change nothing.

1078
00:52:05,040 --> 00:52:07,520
Nothing decision is made.
Yeah.

1079
00:52:07,560 --> 00:52:11,160
And I was like, oh really?
Wow.

1080
00:52:11,400 --> 00:52:13,680
This is not going to be a good
story.

1081
00:52:14,440 --> 00:52:22,000
So I he went or he went on to
tell me that as of the start of

1082
00:52:22,000 --> 00:52:25,280
next month that he would no
longer be able to visit me in

1083
00:52:25,280 --> 00:52:29,240
Salt Lake, but that I could come
to him because he was starting a

1084
00:52:29,360 --> 00:52:31,600
six month period of home
detention.

1085
00:52:31,600 --> 00:52:32,800
Oh my God.
Yeah.

1086
00:52:33,920 --> 00:52:38,240
He's starting house arrest.
But yeah, but he was like, so he

1087
00:52:38,240 --> 00:52:40,080
was like, but you can totally
come see me.

1088
00:52:40,880 --> 00:52:44,640
Oh God, like, oh, wow.
Like, you know, may I right.

1089
00:52:44,760 --> 00:52:47,960
Oh God, I'd love to.
You're clearly a catch.

1090
00:52:48,920 --> 00:52:55,360
Like Oh my God.
So Oh my God, I'm like, OK, are

1091
00:52:55,360 --> 00:52:57,680
you going to have like little
ankle bracelet?

1092
00:52:57,840 --> 00:53:01,520
Like, and he was just so I mean,
it's just ridiculous.

1093
00:53:01,520 --> 00:53:04,520
The whole thing is ridiculous.
Like I can go to work and stuff.

1094
00:53:04,520 --> 00:53:07,680
But like, I mean, and he started
going on, he's like the

1095
00:53:07,680 --> 00:53:11,160
president of this country
doesn't even have to serve any

1096
00:53:11,160 --> 00:53:12,200
time.
And I was like.

1097
00:53:12,480 --> 00:53:14,120
Oh well, that's a different
issue.

1098
00:53:14,120 --> 00:53:16,120
That's true.
But, you know, we can all take

1099
00:53:16,120 --> 00:53:20,120
accountability for the things
that we do too, Like, and the

1100
00:53:20,120 --> 00:53:24,960
fact that he was already saying
somebody like me doesn't deserve

1101
00:53:24,960 --> 00:53:26,880
this kind of treatment, you
know?

1102
00:53:26,880 --> 00:53:27,920
Why?
Because you're a white male.

1103
00:53:28,000 --> 00:53:30,720
Right who?
Who lives in a in a posh time

1104
00:53:30,960 --> 00:53:33,760
and is trying to present the
illusion of wealth?

1105
00:53:34,040 --> 00:53:39,560
So here is a question, why is he
on a six month house arrest?

1106
00:53:40,040 --> 00:53:45,120
So I don't believe that I got
the, the true story on that

1107
00:53:45,120 --> 00:53:50,120
kind.
And I, I said, so may I ask why?

1108
00:53:50,440 --> 00:53:52,440
You know, cuz you're like
relevant question.

1109
00:53:52,440 --> 00:53:56,680
What you know, was it some kind?
Were you a hedge fund manager?

1110
00:53:56,680 --> 00:54:02,880
Like what, what, what happened?
So it turns like that Mister

1111
00:54:02,880 --> 00:54:05,520
Mann had a DUI.
Oh my God.

1112
00:54:05,800 --> 00:54:09,360
For me personally, that is,
that's just a, a line in the

1113
00:54:09,360 --> 00:54:11,160
sand.
That's a hard no pass.

1114
00:54:11,160 --> 00:54:14,600
No thank you, period.
Just no.

1115
00:54:15,160 --> 00:54:18,440
And he went on again to dismiss
it and be like, I mean, I wasn't

1116
00:54:18,440 --> 00:54:20,920
even driving, blah blah blah.
And I'm like, wait, what?

1117
00:54:21,200 --> 00:54:22,960
Yeah, I don't believe.
You for a second either.

1118
00:54:23,400 --> 00:54:26,600
Because you have a home
detention like that would

1119
00:54:26,600 --> 00:54:28,560
suggest something quite serious
to me.

1120
00:54:28,720 --> 00:54:31,280
Yeah, either something quite
serious.

1121
00:54:31,280 --> 00:54:33,640
Yeah.
And or yes, it's not a first

1122
00:54:33,640 --> 00:54:34,840
offense.
Right.

1123
00:54:35,000 --> 00:54:37,680
They don't give out six months,
yes.

1124
00:54:37,680 --> 00:54:39,360
Home detention, yes.
On the.

1125
00:54:39,440 --> 00:54:43,640
First of first minor DUI offense
and not to say minor in the

1126
00:54:43,640 --> 00:54:45,840
sense that this is a minor
thing, right?

1127
00:54:45,840 --> 00:54:47,040
It's not.
It's a serious.

1128
00:54:47,040 --> 00:54:48,640
Thing we should.
Take it very seriously, but I

1129
00:54:48,640 --> 00:54:51,280
just mean with no confounding
fact yes, right, like you didn't

1130
00:54:51,320 --> 00:54:53,320
hurt anyone.
Yes, there were not children in

1131
00:54:53,320 --> 00:54:55,480
the car like you know what I
mean right.

1132
00:54:55,560 --> 00:54:59,480
So minors the wrong word.
But maybe it's simple DUI yes,

1133
00:54:59,480 --> 00:55:01,880
that's what I should say yes,
that's that's not what you do

1134
00:55:01,880 --> 00:55:05,040
for a simple first offense DUI.
So something else going on

1135
00:55:05,040 --> 00:55:07,480
there?
And and like I say, for me

1136
00:55:07,480 --> 00:55:12,800
personally, the the rage of hell
actually starts in the pit of my

1137
00:55:12,800 --> 00:55:16,760
stomach for that particular
thing for many reasons where I'm

1138
00:55:16,760 --> 00:55:20,480
just like, will I unleash right
now or will I save it till later

1139
00:55:20,480 --> 00:55:23,560
because fuck you.
Like that's how I feel when I

1140
00:55:23,560 --> 00:55:25,520
hear that.
And that might mean and

1141
00:55:25,520 --> 00:55:27,560
judgmental.
I actually don't give a fuck

1142
00:55:27,560 --> 00:55:33,280
because if you decide to do
that, then you are an asshole

1143
00:55:33,320 --> 00:55:36,120
and you should have all of the
consequences.

1144
00:55:36,760 --> 00:55:38,760
But I'm going in attention
getting elevated.

1145
00:55:39,600 --> 00:55:42,160
I think that's fair because you
are putting other people's lives

1146
00:55:42,160 --> 00:55:43,600
at.
You are, exactly.

1147
00:55:43,600 --> 00:55:45,080
And that's key.
And you know what?

1148
00:55:45,360 --> 00:55:48,960
We all have phones with apps.
Yeah, That will give you a ride

1149
00:55:48,960 --> 00:55:49,480
home.
Yeah.

1150
00:55:49,480 --> 00:55:51,200
It's easy now.
There's no excuse.

1151
00:55:51,200 --> 00:55:53,640
You also have lakes and there
are scooters, which you probably

1152
00:55:53,640 --> 00:55:54,200
shouldn't.
Do either.

1153
00:55:54,200 --> 00:55:56,120
You shouldn't do that.
You should not do that.

1154
00:55:56,800 --> 00:56:00,360
For some, I have some personal
experience, you're like, just

1155
00:56:00,360 --> 00:56:07,040
get a Lyft, get an Uber.
So I was like, OK, and so, but

1156
00:56:07,040 --> 00:56:09,920
at this point as I'm asking
questions, he's on his phone.

1157
00:56:10,800 --> 00:56:13,680
So I'm like hi over here.
So he's disengaged from the

1158
00:56:13,680 --> 00:56:14,680
conversation.
Yeah.

1159
00:56:15,000 --> 00:56:16,720
And what they're doing ordering
an Uber.

1160
00:56:16,760 --> 00:56:18,680
Well, I said are you watching a
video?

1161
00:56:20,640 --> 00:56:23,280
Cuz it looked like that level of
engagement.

1162
00:56:24,400 --> 00:56:27,520
But you know, at this point I'm
trying to restrain myself from

1163
00:56:27,520 --> 00:56:30,680
like, I don't know what like I
just, I'm like pushing him off

1164
00:56:30,680 --> 00:56:31,440
the bars.
Yeah.

1165
00:56:31,560 --> 00:56:34,400
I'm like, you are a raging
asshole and I never want to see

1166
00:56:34,400 --> 00:56:36,760
you again for so many reasons.
So many reasons.

1167
00:56:36,760 --> 00:56:39,240
So many reasons.
So he goes, Oh no, my Uber is

1168
00:56:39,240 --> 00:56:40,960
going to be here in 2 minutes.
Perfect.

1169
00:56:41,080 --> 00:56:43,000
And I was like, Oh my, it's
concluding.

1170
00:56:43,000 --> 00:56:48,600
All right, good night.
And he lunged again, like trying

1171
00:56:48,600 --> 00:56:51,000
to kiss you or something.
And I was like.

1172
00:56:51,080 --> 00:56:55,720
Yeah, no sharp head turn.
Put my hand out and he goes, I

1173
00:56:55,720 --> 00:56:56,720
love you, I.
Love.

1174
00:56:58,280 --> 00:57:03,560
You, yes, and I just said no,
you don't.

1175
00:57:03,680 --> 00:57:05,240
No, you don't.
You're drunk.

1176
00:57:05,480 --> 00:57:06,120
You're drunk.
Go.

1177
00:57:06,120 --> 00:57:10,360
Home and I just sat up on my
stool and I did not bid him a

1178
00:57:10,360 --> 00:57:12,520
goodbye.
I just like.

1179
00:57:13,040 --> 00:57:15,360
He did not deserve one.
No, he did not.

1180
00:57:15,680 --> 00:57:19,600
And I was just like, what just
happened?

1181
00:57:22,080 --> 00:57:25,440
As you know, the grains of rice
are still dropping off the edge

1182
00:57:25,480 --> 00:57:29,840
of the station.
And I was like, wow.

1183
00:57:30,280 --> 00:57:35,560
And again, I look at Darren and
I just, I'm like, wow, what the

1184
00:57:35,560 --> 00:57:38,400
fuck was that?
And he's like, wow.

1185
00:57:40,320 --> 00:57:42,160
And we just have no words for a
moment.

1186
00:57:42,160 --> 00:57:44,920
So yeah.
So yeah, it was good.

1187
00:57:45,240 --> 00:57:48,640
And I was just like, OK, I would
like something to eat and I

1188
00:57:48,640 --> 00:57:49,640
please.
Yeah.

1189
00:57:49,800 --> 00:57:53,160
And he was like, can I make you
a drink that you could actually

1190
00:57:53,160 --> 00:57:56,720
enjoy?
And so, like I say, meet your

1191
00:57:56,720 --> 00:57:58,640
shout out to that wonderful
restaurant.

1192
00:57:58,720 --> 00:58:01,800
Oh my God bless Darren's heart.
Bless Aaron's heart, all their

1193
00:58:01,800 --> 00:58:04,640
staff honesty because there was
periodically people coming over

1194
00:58:04,640 --> 00:58:10,040
to witness this shit show and
honesty like that restaurant.

1195
00:58:10,160 --> 00:58:13,480
I mean, aside from the food that
I didn't initially get to eat,

1196
00:58:13,480 --> 00:58:19,800
like just I was like, OK, like,
you know, they were clearly

1197
00:58:19,800 --> 00:58:23,440
looking out for me, aware that
this man was not acting in a

1198
00:58:23,440 --> 00:58:27,000
nice way.
And it just, yeah, I'm just

1199
00:58:27,000 --> 00:58:28,960
going to eat there all the time,
but not on dates.

1200
00:58:28,960 --> 00:58:32,760
Yeah, maybe just you and me go.
That's going to be a friend

1201
00:58:32,760 --> 00:58:35,080
please from my on because I
don't want it ruined.

1202
00:58:35,120 --> 00:58:36,840
Yeah, that's fair.
I don't want it ruined.

1203
00:58:37,120 --> 00:58:42,120
But yeah, that was my wonderful
tea and I came home and my my

1204
00:58:42,120 --> 00:58:44,480
son is so cute.
I don't I don't like talking by

1205
00:58:44,480 --> 00:58:46,600
dating to my kids.
Like a lot of times I wouldn't

1206
00:58:46,600 --> 00:58:49,720
even tell them I'm going on a
date, but they can tell because

1207
00:58:49,720 --> 00:58:51,800
I'm kind of a hermit.
So though by like, are you going

1208
00:58:51,800 --> 00:58:54,840
on a date?
No, I mean, yeah, no, they're

1209
00:58:54,880 --> 00:58:57,080
like, but you.
Brushed your hair like.

1210
00:58:58,920 --> 00:59:00,800
And my son was like, oh, how was
it, mom?

1211
00:59:00,800 --> 00:59:02,160
He's like you're home really
early.

1212
00:59:02,240 --> 00:59:04,400
And I was like, you're like,
yeah, there's a reason.

1213
00:59:04,640 --> 00:59:05,640
Actually, there's a bunch of
reasons.

1214
00:59:06,240 --> 00:59:12,440
And so I shared the story with
him and he was like, mom, he was

1215
00:59:12,440 --> 00:59:14,160
so sweet.
He's like, you deserve so much

1216
00:59:14,160 --> 00:59:15,720
more.
Like, I'm really sorry that

1217
00:59:15,720 --> 00:59:17,480
happened.
And you know what?

1218
00:59:17,480 --> 00:59:20,600
My first thought was what?
This is great material for the

1219
00:59:20,600 --> 00:59:25,040
podcast.
I'd like, you know, it took the

1220
00:59:25,040 --> 00:59:28,440
sting away a little because I
didn't feel that upset.

1221
00:59:28,440 --> 00:59:31,640
I was like, let's share this
with the world, right?

1222
00:59:31,840 --> 00:59:36,320
As you should, yes, Because I'm
sure I'm not the only person to

1223
00:59:36,320 --> 00:59:39,280
have had a deal like that.
I've definitely had someone show

1224
00:59:39,280 --> 00:59:42,400
up who had pregamed before.
Yeah, that's happened.

1225
00:59:42,400 --> 00:59:44,880
Not a good look, like I
understand nerves and stuff, but

1226
00:59:44,880 --> 00:59:49,520
maybe some breathing exercises
or you know, other kind of

1227
00:59:49,520 --> 00:59:51,520
nervous system regulation
techniques?

1228
00:59:51,520 --> 00:59:55,600
Like maybe don't down 3 drinks.
Yeah that's unbelievable.

1229
00:59:55,600 --> 00:59:57,560
It's not good.
No, it's not good.

1230
00:59:57,800 --> 01:00:01,280
So then, you know, I was a
little bit tipsy at that point

1231
01:00:01,280 --> 01:00:04,920
because I'd had my little drink
and like no food and I had

1232
01:00:04,920 --> 01:00:12,480
ubered and I just rage texted an
essay to this man and it wasn't

1233
01:00:12,480 --> 01:00:15,480
sweet in any way good.
I was like fuck you good.

1234
01:00:15,480 --> 01:00:16,920
Fuck you for drinking and
driving.

1235
01:00:17,400 --> 01:00:20,360
Do not ever contact me again.
You were sloppy.

1236
01:00:20,360 --> 01:00:24,640
You dropped food, food that was
like an Irish word there.

1237
01:00:24,640 --> 01:00:30,480
And you know, you were just not
supportive to the environment of

1238
01:00:30,480 --> 01:00:32,840
the people that work there.
And fuck you.

1239
01:00:32,880 --> 01:00:35,520
Yeah, he was a major asshole.
He was horrible to you and

1240
01:00:35,520 --> 01:00:38,920
everyone around.
Lengthy, lengthy text was sent.

1241
01:00:39,120 --> 01:00:40,400
That's great.
Well done.

1242
01:00:40,520 --> 01:00:43,440
And I have never heard from him
since, thank God.

1243
01:00:46,320 --> 01:00:49,000
Claire, I know.
Do you want to know who liked me

1244
01:00:49,000 --> 01:00:51,280
on Bumble the other day?
Stop.

1245
01:00:51,280 --> 01:00:55,960
No, it's him.
Oh he's still looking for a home

1246
01:00:55,960 --> 01:00:59,840
detention mate.
Yes, Oh my God, I did see him on

1247
01:00:59,840 --> 01:01:00,480
Bumble.
Too.

1248
01:01:00,480 --> 01:01:02,840
Can you believe?
Yeah, he's in my like queue

1249
01:01:03,000 --> 01:01:04,560
right now because we.
Speak it.

1250
01:01:06,400 --> 01:01:08,720
Part of me feels like you should
like him back and we should fuck

1251
01:01:08,720 --> 01:01:11,240
with him but honestly he's not
worth it.

1252
01:01:11,240 --> 01:01:14,000
Cuz he's gross.
No, that's gross gross.

1253
01:01:14,040 --> 01:01:16,920
So I'm not gross driving to his
home detention site.

1254
01:01:17,480 --> 01:01:21,400
I know he'd be like, so would
you like to come to my house or

1255
01:01:21,400 --> 01:01:24,360
my office between the hours of
nine to one?

1256
01:01:25,080 --> 01:01:26,920
No, I do not.
God.

1257
01:01:27,400 --> 01:01:32,160
Like the audacity of actually,
like, he fully believed that was

1258
01:01:32,160 --> 01:01:34,040
a reasonable request.
It's unbelievable.

1259
01:01:34,040 --> 01:01:36,280
Like he fully believed that was
OK.

1260
01:01:36,600 --> 01:01:38,600
Yeah.
Well, he was probably, like, how

1261
01:01:38,600 --> 01:01:40,200
many drinks in at this point?
Right.

1262
01:01:40,200 --> 01:01:43,240
At least three cocktails, more
than half of a bottle of wine.

1263
01:01:43,240 --> 01:01:45,160
Oh, my God.
In a very short space of time.

1264
01:01:45,200 --> 01:01:48,160
Also, let's say, like, not
spread out over 5 or 6 hours,

1265
01:01:48,160 --> 01:01:50,520
but like, all concentrated,
right?

1266
01:01:50,520 --> 01:01:52,320
Yeah.
So yeah, he was fucked up.

1267
01:01:52,640 --> 01:01:55,360
And Mr. Mann did have some
bruises on his arm.

1268
01:01:55,360 --> 01:01:58,640
Because you know the the Bike
Act a bike accident.

1269
01:01:59,360 --> 01:02:04,520
He said that he was on an E bike
with his groceries and it it

1270
01:02:04,520 --> 01:02:06,080
happened.
Because he's not allowed to

1271
01:02:06,080 --> 01:02:07,160
drive.
Is that why?

1272
01:02:07,360 --> 01:02:11,400
I think it could be that and or
I mean he could have been riding

1273
01:02:11,400 --> 01:02:13,680
his bike also under the
influence or.

1274
01:02:13,680 --> 01:02:16,720
He could have.
Stumbled and fell and made it

1275
01:02:16,720 --> 01:02:18,920
up.
I believe nothing this man says.

1276
01:02:18,920 --> 01:02:20,360
Yeah, many possibilities.
Yeah.

1277
01:02:20,520 --> 01:02:21,920
Gross.
Wow.

1278
01:02:22,240 --> 01:02:24,000
Yeah.
Oh my God, what a story.

1279
01:02:24,160 --> 01:02:28,400
It was, you know, just what an
eventful evening.

1280
01:02:28,640 --> 01:02:30,840
Yeah, yeah.
Not in a good way.

1281
01:02:30,840 --> 01:02:33,400
Nope.
So yeah, the bars in hell,

1282
01:02:33,400 --> 01:02:36,400
everybody.
It really like that was the next

1283
01:02:36,400 --> 01:02:39,480
level that I couldn't ever have
anticipated.

1284
01:02:39,920 --> 01:02:43,080
Yeah, cuz like you show up and
you're like, maybe they're

1285
01:02:43,080 --> 01:02:47,280
shorter, maybe they're there's
going to be no chemistry, maybe

1286
01:02:47,280 --> 01:02:50,080
this maybe, but you're never
like maybe they're going to

1287
01:02:50,080 --> 01:02:52,040
spill food.
Everywhere sit in a really

1288
01:02:52,040 --> 01:02:53,800
weird.
Spot and then tell me about

1289
01:02:53,800 --> 01:02:56,800
their home detention as they
lunge at me and tell me they

1290
01:02:56,800 --> 01:02:59,800
love me.
I feel like that is just the

1291
01:02:59,800 --> 01:03:01,720
cherry on the top that he said I
love.

1292
01:03:01,800 --> 01:03:07,720
You and I have to point out that
I think probably two to three

1293
01:03:07,720 --> 01:03:10,920
times on the Oh my God, what was
the line?

1294
01:03:11,720 --> 01:03:16,920
He said something like you're a
prize and IA 100% don't deserve

1295
01:03:16,920 --> 01:03:19,280
you or you're way out of my
you're 100% out of my.

1296
01:03:19,280 --> 01:03:20,880
League.
OK, well all of those are true

1297
01:03:20,880 --> 01:03:22,400
statements.
You are a prize.

1298
01:03:22,800 --> 01:03:26,760
You are way out of his league
and he does not deserve you nor

1299
01:03:26,760 --> 01:03:29,720
any other woman.
So he was speaking truth there.

1300
01:03:29,840 --> 01:03:32,560
The dog on the street is out of
his league.

1301
01:03:32,640 --> 01:03:35,600
The feral cats are out of his
league.

1302
01:03:35,680 --> 01:03:39,880
Like he is not deserving of any
company of any kind.

1303
01:03:39,880 --> 01:03:43,920
I'm sorry.
Like I'm just, oh, I just I'm so

1304
01:03:44,520 --> 01:03:49,040
irritated by the arrogance, the
nonchalant of like, I did a

1305
01:03:49,040 --> 01:03:52,360
really shitty thing, but I'm
ironically going to do the same

1306
01:03:52,360 --> 01:03:54,560
thing I'm complaining about if
people not taking

1307
01:03:54,560 --> 01:03:56,680
accountability.
Right.

1308
01:03:56,720 --> 01:03:58,000
Sounds like he's learned
nothing.

1309
01:03:58,000 --> 01:04:00,040
No.
OK Sir, if you're listening,

1310
01:04:00,040 --> 01:04:03,360
please be better.
You need to go to therapy.

1311
01:04:03,360 --> 01:04:07,120
Yes, you need to go to a A at a
minimum, if not some sort of

1312
01:04:07,120 --> 01:04:08,840
rehab.
Stop drinking, please.

1313
01:04:08,840 --> 01:04:11,640
Yes.
And use your home detention to

1314
01:04:11,800 --> 01:04:13,560
what's that?
Unlimited therapy app.

1315
01:04:13,560 --> 01:04:16,160
You can get better.
Something like that.

1316
01:04:16,680 --> 01:04:17,560
Yeah.
Better help.

1317
01:04:17,560 --> 01:04:19,640
Better something.
Yeah, Something we'll do Yeah,

1318
01:04:19,800 --> 01:04:22,600
please get a subscription.
Please get help and go every

1319
01:04:22,600 --> 01:04:23,480
day.
Yeah.

1320
01:04:23,840 --> 01:04:25,400
And take some accountability.
Yeah.

1321
01:04:25,400 --> 01:04:28,520
For your actions, yes.
And be reflective about your

1322
01:04:28,520 --> 01:04:30,680
relationship with alcohol,
because it's not good.

1323
01:04:30,680 --> 01:04:34,760
No, and let go of the idea of
finding a home detention mate.

1324
01:04:34,840 --> 01:04:38,720
Yeah, get off Bumble.
Yes, and spend April to October

1325
01:04:39,080 --> 01:04:41,440
reflecting.
Yeah, and working on yourself.

1326
01:04:41,560 --> 01:04:43,920
Please God, Yeah, OK, Well, I
mean.

1327
01:04:43,960 --> 01:04:47,680
I think we know he won't, but no
that would be Nope.

1328
01:04:48,360 --> 01:04:50,320
Definitely the only path back to
redemption.

1329
01:04:50,320 --> 01:04:52,680
Yes, Yeah.
So there you go.

1330
01:04:52,680 --> 01:04:54,160
It was a treat.
Wow.

1331
01:04:54,400 --> 01:04:56,640
Yeah.
I walked down the hill to Temple

1332
01:04:56,640 --> 01:04:59,360
Square and sent you a very long
voice memo.

1333
01:04:59,360 --> 01:05:01,400
You.
Did and a little cute selfie.

1334
01:05:01,440 --> 01:05:04,160
Oh yeah, that's right.
We'll post that on our Insta

1335
01:05:04,160 --> 01:05:07,600
webs.
The post Horrendous day glow.

1336
01:05:09,560 --> 01:05:11,000
All right.
Well, I think we should wrap

1337
01:05:11,000 --> 01:05:14,000
this up, but just a couple
things.

1338
01:05:14,000 --> 01:05:17,360
Housekeeping items first.
Number one big shout out again

1339
01:05:17,360 --> 01:05:20,120
to Darren the bartender.
You are a real 1.

1340
01:05:20,120 --> 01:05:21,560
You're a real one.
We're going to come back and

1341
01:05:21,560 --> 01:05:26,800
have some couple drinks at Arlo
definitely and relive the glory

1342
01:05:26,880 --> 01:05:29,960
that was Claire's second date.
And I'm going to have my own

1343
01:05:29,960 --> 01:05:33,120
meal, dammit.
I'm going to order the risotto.

1344
01:05:33,120 --> 01:05:36,680
I'm just kidding.
And you're gonna cut the bowl

1345
01:05:36,760 --> 01:05:40,400
and like, not let me have any.
Scoops, but yeah, fend you off

1346
01:05:40,400 --> 01:05:42,840
with my fork and then slobber on
your face.

1347
01:05:43,240 --> 01:05:45,600
And yeah, just shout out to Arlo
too.

1348
01:05:45,680 --> 01:05:48,120
Just what a lovely place.
Yeah, go to Arlo, y'all.

1349
01:05:48,120 --> 01:05:50,320
It's a great place that's
deserving of your business.

1350
01:05:50,320 --> 01:05:52,520
That's so good.
Oh my God, the food is.

1351
01:05:53,120 --> 01:05:54,600
It's divine.
It is divine.

1352
01:05:55,240 --> 01:05:56,680
All right, friends, we're going
to wrap up.

1353
01:05:57,480 --> 01:06:00,760
If you enjoyed this episode or
any of our episodes, please

1354
01:06:00,880 --> 01:06:04,160
consider giving us a five star
rating on Apple Podcasts or

1355
01:06:04,160 --> 01:06:07,160
Spotify.
Leave us a review, leave us some

1356
01:06:07,160 --> 01:06:09,560
comments.
And also, I would say if you

1357
01:06:09,560 --> 01:06:14,200
have a horrible date story, feel
free to send that in and we

1358
01:06:14,200 --> 01:06:18,480
would be happy to read it,
discuss it on our podcast.

1359
01:06:18,760 --> 01:06:22,280
And just know you're not alone
in the horrendous world of

1360
01:06:22,280 --> 01:06:24,760
dating indeed.
Yes, beautiful.

1361
01:06:25,200 --> 01:06:27,360
Well, have a great rest of your
week.

1362
01:06:27,360 --> 01:06:31,520
I'm going to go home and nurse
this eye lay in a dark room

1363
01:06:31,600 --> 01:06:36,200
until it feels better.
And hopefully you will see no

1364
01:06:36,200 --> 01:06:39,520
more men from the apps while
you're seeking medical

1365
01:06:39,520 --> 01:06:41,320
attention, hopefully I will.
Not.

1366
01:06:42,640 --> 01:06:44,440
Good times.
What a wonderful time to be

1367
01:06:44,440 --> 01:06:45,800
alive.
Oh, it's magical.

1368
01:06:46,040 --> 01:06:47,960
Beautiful.
OK, friends, take care.

1369
01:06:48,280 --> 01:06:51,080
We'll come.
We'll be back at you next time.

1370
01:06:51,320 --> 01:06:52,640
See you soon.
Bye.