Feb. 24, 2026
Dispatches from the Male Loneliness Epidemic
Claire and Mel discuss the State of the Pod and open up the mailbag for comments and questions from listeners. Then they dive into the so-called Male Loneliness Epidemic. Are men really more lonely than women? Why is so much attention focused on this phenomenon? The Salty Hoes weigh in on the controversy. Tune in to listen to our most chaotic episode yet!
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Hello and welcome back to our WE
podcast.
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My name is Claire.
And I'm Mel.
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And together we are the salty
hoes.
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And today, as always, we have a
great show for you.
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We're going to catch you up in a
few things in our lives and vis
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A vis the podcast.
And we're going to discuss the
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male loneliness epidemic, which
is a topic I'm sure you're all
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familiar with.
So Mel, tell me about your week.
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How is it and what is going on
with you?
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OK.
Yeah, the week.
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So first of all, we are having a
big snow right now.
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We are finally.
Winter has come to Utah in
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almost March.
Oh, I'm so excited.
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Yay.
Yeah.
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Except for driving today has
been terrible.
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Pretty bad.
Pretty bad.
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Driving down my hill has been
just a white knuckle horrid
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experience.
I would imagine that's a pretty
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steep hill.
It's a pretty steep hill.
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Ohio.
My goodness.
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We have probably 6 to 8 inches
of snow at my house right now.
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Yeah, I would love a good 6 to 8
inches girl.
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You and me both.
Yes, where is it?
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The snow is here.
Maybe it's a sign.
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Maybe the the other 68 inches
will manifest manifest.
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Afterwards, OK, I like it.
Let's let's, you know, send our
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energy out to the universe, Yes?
For 6 to 8 inches, send it.
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Send it, please.
Yes, we are in a we are in dire
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straits here.
Much like the state, we are in a
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drought.
Good thing we live in Utah.
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Good thing we live in Utah.
Good thing we live in Utah, so
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let's see what else happened
this week.
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I did have a date last night, so
that was the second date with
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Tennis Guy.
Oh tennis guy with the nice
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follow up message.
Yeah, no, he's quite nice.
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Uh huh.
The date was good.
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We had dinner.
He was very nice, very sweet.
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I.
Don't like nice?
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Yeah, I'm not feeling Sparks
here.
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I'm not feeling.
I don't know if I'm feeling
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Sparks like the conversation was
good.
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He did ask questions.
Oh, I know right.
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Bonus points, but I felt like I.
Carried the conversation.
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Yeah, mostly.
That's not fun, right?
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It's kind of exhaustive.
It right, It kind of is.
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It's like I need you to share
the load a little bit.
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He did try like, yeah, I'm not,
you know, nothing is wrong here.
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There's no red flags.
Right, he seems like a lovely a
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lovely.
Pleasant man.
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He seems like a lovely human.
I'm just not sure I'm feeling
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it.
Which is fair, right?
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Sometimes totally fair.
You know, things with two people
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just don't workout, don't match.
Yeah, sadly.
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Very sadly, actually.
I know I'm not sad about this
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guy, but I'm just thinking about
other situations that I would
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have preferred to work out
better.
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But let's see, what else was I
gonna say?
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Yes, the most chemistry I felt
last night on our date was when
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he kind of went up to go to the
bathroom and I started talking
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to the 2 girls that were sitting
at the table next to us.
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Just two girlfriends having a
wee catch up.
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Yeah Oh my God, look at me.
I'm saying we now.
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I'm rubbing off on you.
You are.
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I love it.
And they said something to me.
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I started talking to them and we
were like totally hitting it
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off.
We're like me, you see, friends.
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At least you made two new
friends from the evening.
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I did.
They were love interest. 02 new
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besties.
Yay yay.
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Oh my goodness.
Anyway, so that was fun.
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Well, a good night.
How was your week?
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My week?
Well, actually the weather is
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impeding my dating because I had
a date tonight.
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Oh, that's right, you did.
I did.
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It's cancelled.
Well, this one is interesting
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because as you know, I've
already shared.
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I we have probably matched.
I I've lost kind like many
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times, 7 or 8 like a lot of
times.
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Wow, so how does it usually go
when you match with this man?
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So like, is there any
conversation or is there just no
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messages exchanged at all?
So that is a good question
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because about the, I would say
about the first have to put
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percentages on it, like 40%.
There was just nothing.
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Oh, wow.
And also I have a really in his
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defense, I have a very low
threshold for dating sites.
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And so sometimes I'm like, I'm
going to go on and I'm going to
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be less weird and more open and
I'm going to swipe right because
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my problem is I will go through
about 700 profiles and swipe
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right like once.
Yeah.
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Because I'm just like, oh, oh, I
feel that you're even pickier
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than I am.
And I'm pretty picky.
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Yes, I, I have a ridiculous set
of criteria.
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Sometimes I will openly admit
that maybe it's self sabotage.
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I don't know.
We need to get a therapist on
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the show, but we should get a.
Therapist on the show sometime.
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To analyze our our blockages, a
little guest appearance
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blockage.
I should see if my therapist
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would do it.
She's right.
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She is amazing.
Yeah.
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OK.
All right, we will do that.
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Put a pin in that, yes, keep
telling me.
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OK.
So no conversation.
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And then one time I was just
like, this is ridiculous.
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Why does this man keep liking
me?
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And so I was like, you know, so
hi again, you know.
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The 5th time.
Like I need some conversation.
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I need more than like 3 words
every two days.
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Yeah, it's just like, and no
question, just like I'll ask a
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question and they answer it and
it's like, my dudes, all you
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have to say is you question.
Mark, how about you?
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How about you HBU question mark?
Like that's it.
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It's so simple, but it would
just be like, you know, 3 words
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and I'd be like oh wow, OK, well
you know, similar to your
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situation last night.
What do I do with this?
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Like, do I have to carry the
whole thing?
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Yeah, Well, he.
Wasn't that bad, it was just
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maybe I'm more naturally
talkative.
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Yeah, but but also they need to
ask more questions like what is
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this phenomena, right.
So this time I saw I was on
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Tinder, I saw him on there and I
saw he had liked me.
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And so I liked him back.
And I just said, what is
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different this time?
I was not beaten around the
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Bush.
I was just like, I am not this
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the last time is like watching
paint dry.
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So I just I'm not doing that
anymore.
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So wow.
He actually responded and he was
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like, let's plan A.
Diet, Oh my God, look at that
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because.
You know, we feel like we've
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known each other for years at
this point.
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I.
Mean you almost almost have
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known each other, not quite
known each other.
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This sounds like a student.
I once had my class 4 times.
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Oh wow.
Or.
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Consecutive times they must have
loved you.
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Well, I don't think he disliked
me.
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Yeah, but he just couldn't seal
the deal.
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Just couldn't seal.
And I asked him the same
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question on the fourth attempt.
I was like, hey, buddy, what's
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gonna be different this
semester?
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It's gonna be different.
It's been the same pattern 3
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semesters in a row.
And much like your guy, he would
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get to exam one.
He would do OK.
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Yeah, Maybe pull out ABB minus.
Uh huh.
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And then sort of taper off.
You're just like.
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I guess question mark you're
like, I know you're capable of
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succeeding.
Yes, if you can get AB on test 1
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and then gone.
You're like, just stay with me,
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right?
Stay with me, brother.
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Stay with.
Me in early.
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Trial.
Oh my God.
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Sounds very similar to your your
date your cancelled.
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Date my cancelled date.
So he we arranged something.
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It's it's been actually a couple
of weeks.
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So we were gonna finally do it
tonight.
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It was all in in place.
And this morning he was like,
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can we play it by ear?
Because like, it's really,
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really snowy.
And to give him his dues, he
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lives in the mountains, so.
Well, that is.
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Fair.
They're getting a couple of
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feet.
Yeah, like for all our we Irish
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listeners out there who will,
you know, understand when like 2
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inches fall in Ireland, the
whole country is at a stand.
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So like, they are getting feet.
Yeah.
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Feet, yes, maybe 2-3 feet in the
mountains.
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So I will forgive him.
And here's you and I have had
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this conversation many times.
Right away.
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He made other plants.
Oh.
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Good.
We like this.
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We do like this.
We like this, so we're gonna
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have a wee Saturday afternoon
beverage.
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Oh, I like it.
Yeah.
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Good.
OK.
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Place TBD, but we're on the
right track.
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That's OK.
You have a time.
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You have a plan.
Yeah, at least you have the
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concept of a plan.
Wow, here we go.
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I feel good about this.
OK, not necessarily about, you
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know, this is a relationship,
but I feel good about the fact
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you're finally gonna go on a
date with this man.
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No, it feels just a date period.
A date period Claire is
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practicing.
Yay.
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Good job, Claire.
So yeah, hey, progress is
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progress.
Progress is progress.
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I'm gonna have a date and I will
return and report.
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OK?
I love that.
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We will definitely do that.
All right.
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Well, Speaking of updates, we
also wanted to give all y'all a
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little update on how the podcast
is going.
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So yes, yeah, Claire, I know you
are more tuned into the numbers.
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Maybe just give us a ballpark
like how many people have or how
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many listens have.
We had so far.
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I love the metrics.
Right, they're so.
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Too, I love the metrics.
I'm a little ashamed to say
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that, but I do love the metrics.
Not that I'm fixated on them,
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but they're just interesting.
But we should start with a thank
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you because we have had, we're
coming up on 1500 listens that's
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amazing across Apple and
Spotify.
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Wow.
So thank you for listening.
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Yeah, all you salty hoes and
salty pros out there.
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Thank you from the bottom of our
heart for coming along with us
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on this journey.
We're having a ton of fun.
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I hope that you.
Are much fun.
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Like we are genuinely so just
delighted that anyone is
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listening because we were like,
you know, we just want to do
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this thing.
It's kind of cathartic for us
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both.
It's really fun as, as a lot of
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you have commented, me and Mel
have great chemistry.
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Yes, we love it.
It's so fun.
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And yeah, we we've had these
listens.
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And as you point out, we know
from your brother, my
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brother-in-law, that we do have
some bona fide salty Bros out
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there.
But also our little data points
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show that we have about 15% male
listeners.
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Oh, that's great.
Yes, I love that.
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And I have another dear friend
whose husband is also you're a
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frequent listener.
Wow.
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And when I bump into him, he'll
be like, Oh my goodness.
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And you know, give a give a
little tidbit from from the pod.
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So wow.
Wow, extra shout out to our
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salty Bros out there.
Thank you, salty Bros.
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Also, we're global.
We're global.
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I mean, we kind of knew that
because it's actually been a
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really lovely byproduct of all
of this because I feel like I am
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back in touch with like so many
friends from Ireland that are
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like, oh, it's so nice to hear
your voice.
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And like, you know, we're like,
when I come back on a wee trip,
227
00:10:43,640 --> 00:10:45,840
like, let's get a drink.
I love that.
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00:10:45,840 --> 00:10:47,480
So that's been a really lovely
thing.
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00:10:47,480 --> 00:10:51,800
So we obviously have Irish
visitors, visitors, visitors to
230
00:10:51,800 --> 00:10:56,320
the pod, our visitors.
We also have some English ones
231
00:10:56,320 --> 00:10:56,960
too.
Oh.
232
00:10:57,040 --> 00:11:00,080
OK, so they.
Are listening in the UK to take
233
00:11:00,080 --> 00:11:01,640
back.
Everything I said about the UK,
234
00:11:01,640 --> 00:11:03,800
sorry friends.
Yeah, we appreciate you
235
00:11:03,800 --> 00:11:05,280
listening.
Just don't be in the street.
236
00:11:05,760 --> 00:11:09,120
But yeah, we might sit on the
British Museum a little bit,
237
00:11:09,120 --> 00:11:12,160
especially this week, but yes,
yes, yes.
238
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And I.
Mean for other things too.
239
00:11:14,080 --> 00:11:15,840
Yeah, I mean, really.
For all the things, yes, for all
240
00:11:15,840 --> 00:11:18,000
the colonies, it's great.
We have some UK listeners.
241
00:11:18,200 --> 00:11:19,720
Thank you.
Thank you Brits.
242
00:11:19,960 --> 00:11:21,040
Thank you, Brits.
We love you.
243
00:11:21,280 --> 00:11:23,000
You did one thing right.
Just kidding.
244
00:11:24,160 --> 00:11:26,840
Australia.
I think that's my Auntie Lynn.
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00:11:26,840 --> 00:11:28,440
So shout out, Auntie Lynn.
Thank you.
246
00:11:29,000 --> 00:11:33,920
Yes, yes, I have some rallies,
as they'd say in Australia, in.
247
00:11:34,320 --> 00:11:38,840
Sydney so my God, I love how
Australians turn every word into
248
00:11:38,840 --> 00:11:40,760
happy fun time.
It's amazing.
249
00:11:40,880 --> 00:11:42,680
It just feels.
Like such a happy fun time
250
00:11:42,680 --> 00:11:44,040
place.
It's joyful.
251
00:11:44,040 --> 00:11:48,240
Yeah, I need to.
Go Mirka, Mirka all across
252
00:11:48,240 --> 00:11:52,000
Mirka, we've got all this.
Well, not all the states
253
00:11:52,000 --> 00:11:54,720
represented actually about 8:00
but but that's.
254
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All right, we're getting there.
But we're just so grateful.
255
00:11:57,800 --> 00:12:00,960
It's like, this isn't like a a
Bragg metric.
256
00:12:00,960 --> 00:12:06,120
It's like a gleeful surprise.
We're so grateful to everybody
257
00:12:06,640 --> 00:12:08,200
for listening.
Yeah, we really.
258
00:12:08,200 --> 00:12:11,760
Really are and I feel like this
is doing pretty well.
259
00:12:11,760 --> 00:12:17,400
So we're recording this on
February 18th and I feel like
260
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for being in this game, what a
whole six or seven weeks, we're
261
00:12:20,840 --> 00:12:22,960
actually doing quite well.
So we're so.
262
00:12:22,960 --> 00:12:24,240
Excited I'm.
Proud of us.
263
00:12:24,520 --> 00:12:26,840
I, I am too.
I, you know, the thing that I'm
264
00:12:26,840 --> 00:12:30,080
proud of us for and it's, it's
not our we data set.
265
00:12:30,080 --> 00:12:33,760
It's we decided to do a thing
and we're doing a thing that's
266
00:12:33,800 --> 00:12:35,040
right.
So we just wanted.
267
00:12:35,040 --> 00:12:36,360
To do a thing, we wanted to do
a.
268
00:12:36,400 --> 00:12:38,720
Thing And I think the thing has
been spectacular the.
269
00:12:38,720 --> 00:12:41,280
Thing has been so much fun.
So much fun.
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00:12:41,280 --> 00:12:43,040
So do.
Your thing, peoples, if you're
271
00:12:43,040 --> 00:12:45,840
like, I have always wanted to do
a thing, just do a thing.
272
00:12:45,840 --> 00:12:46,400
You know what?
Give.
273
00:12:46,400 --> 00:12:49,800
It a try and like maybe it won't
succeed and like maybe this
274
00:12:49,800 --> 00:12:52,520
podcast will be done after a
while, who knows?
275
00:12:52,520 --> 00:12:54,720
But you know what?
At least we tried.
276
00:12:54,840 --> 00:12:57,000
And we're.
Just enjoying it so much.
277
00:12:57,000 --> 00:12:58,720
So, so much.
This is the highlight of my
278
00:12:58,760 --> 00:13:00,720
week.
Me too, like I.
279
00:13:01,080 --> 00:13:03,720
I came in here today.
I was like, I'm so excited.
280
00:13:03,720 --> 00:13:04,840
I know.
Yeah.
281
00:13:04,920 --> 00:13:08,000
So we're so grateful.
So thank you for listening.
282
00:13:08,400 --> 00:13:10,800
Thank you.
We will also say that if you are
283
00:13:10,800 --> 00:13:13,800
listening, what can people do
for us, Mel?
284
00:13:13,800 --> 00:13:14,800
Yeah.
Absolutely.
285
00:13:14,800 --> 00:13:18,840
So if you would like to see this
podcast succeed, if you would
286
00:13:18,840 --> 00:13:21,760
like it to continue, there are a
few things you could do to help
287
00:13:21,760 --> 00:13:24,280
us out if you have the time and
bandwidth.
288
00:13:24,320 --> 00:13:27,160
Now, we're not trying to like,
you know, make this a
289
00:13:27,160 --> 00:13:31,680
requirement, but #1 would be to
give us a five star rating on
290
00:13:31,720 --> 00:13:35,080
either Spotify or Apple Podcasts
or if you think we.
291
00:13:35,080 --> 00:13:37,640
Deserve it, of course of.
Course, we hope we do once
292
00:13:37,680 --> 00:13:38,680
again.
Yeah, we hope we do.
293
00:13:38,680 --> 00:13:41,160
If you're still listening, I
feel like you are probably
294
00:13:41,160 --> 00:13:42,400
enjoying it.
Yeah, we.
295
00:13:42,400 --> 00:13:43,640
Hope so, yeah.
So.
296
00:13:43,640 --> 00:13:47,760
If you could give us a five star
rating and bonus points, if you
297
00:13:47,760 --> 00:13:50,720
could write us a little review,
that would actually be huge for
298
00:13:50,720 --> 00:13:51,640
us.
It's so.
299
00:13:51,640 --> 00:13:52,640
Good.
Yeah, those.
300
00:13:52,800 --> 00:13:56,760
As things help the podcast be
discovered by new people, it
301
00:13:56,760 --> 00:13:58,440
kind of moves it up in the
rankings.
302
00:13:58,440 --> 00:14:00,440
So if people are searching then
that helps.
303
00:14:00,920 --> 00:14:04,000
We do have some salty hoes and
salty Bros that have already
304
00:14:04,000 --> 00:14:06,000
done that.
And for those of you that have,
305
00:14:06,000 --> 00:14:07,800
thank you, thank you, thank you,
thank you, thank you.
306
00:14:07,800 --> 00:14:10,920
Bottom of our hearts.
It is so appreciated so much.
307
00:14:11,280 --> 00:14:14,040
And something else that you
could do would just be to leave
308
00:14:14,040 --> 00:14:17,240
a we comment on our episodes.
So if there's something you
309
00:14:17,240 --> 00:14:20,800
liked or didn't like, we're open
to all feedback, but just leave
310
00:14:20,800 --> 00:14:23,240
us a we comment.
What did do you think?
311
00:14:23,240 --> 00:14:26,720
What did you enjoy hearing?
What should be our next Smash or
312
00:14:26,720 --> 00:14:28,640
Pass category?
Yeah, did.
313
00:14:28,640 --> 00:14:29,720
You enjoy that?
Yeah.
314
00:14:30,280 --> 00:14:32,840
Do you want us to do that again?
Like we're happy to?
315
00:14:32,840 --> 00:14:34,280
Yep.
Feedback really helps.
316
00:14:34,280 --> 00:14:36,600
Us out, you know I did.
Have one suggestion for that.
317
00:14:36,600 --> 00:14:40,560
Someone's like, well, you should
do smash or pass for the leaders
318
00:14:40,600 --> 00:14:42,440
of the LDS Church.
And I was like, well, that is
319
00:14:42,440 --> 00:14:43,800
really easy.
That's just a hard pass.
320
00:14:43,800 --> 00:14:45,360
It's just a.
Hard pass the board.
321
00:14:45,360 --> 00:14:48,160
All of them done, all of them
easy like.
322
00:14:48,200 --> 00:14:51,600
That is, yeah, we can.
I just wow.
323
00:14:51,640 --> 00:14:52,600
Yes.
No.
324
00:14:52,920 --> 00:14:54,760
I know.
So if you have another great
325
00:14:54,760 --> 00:14:57,280
idea, something you wanna hear,
please just leave us a comment.
326
00:14:57,280 --> 00:15:00,200
We would love to hear it.
We'd love to kinda hear how
327
00:15:00,200 --> 00:15:03,800
these things are landing.
We are getting texts from
328
00:15:03,800 --> 00:15:06,560
friends and stuff like that, but
it would be really great to get
329
00:15:06,560 --> 00:15:09,080
a comment on Spotify or Apple
Podcasts.
330
00:15:09,760 --> 00:15:13,480
Another exciting update to kind
of loop you in on is that we now
331
00:15:13,480 --> 00:15:16,200
have a website and a YouTube
channel.
332
00:15:16,400 --> 00:15:18,760
I love this.
I know so so far y'all they're a
333
00:15:18,760 --> 00:15:21,000
little bit basic yeah, but we do
bear with us yeah.
334
00:15:21,000 --> 00:15:23,840
We do plan on fancying we have
full time jobs we're.
335
00:15:23,880 --> 00:15:26,240
Trying.
I know, I mean I feel.
336
00:15:26,240 --> 00:15:30,080
Like you have several full time
jobs there, it's fine.
337
00:15:30,280 --> 00:15:32,240
Yeah.
So if you want to visit our
338
00:15:32,240 --> 00:15:36,840
website, www.saltyhose.com and
our YouTube channel is
339
00:15:36,840 --> 00:15:39,320
Saltyhose, so you can find us
there as well.
340
00:15:39,640 --> 00:15:42,920
Eventually we plan to do video
podcasts, but we're not quite
341
00:15:42,920 --> 00:15:44,320
there yet.
We're not quite there.
342
00:15:44,320 --> 00:15:46,400
But we're learning.
The kids is learning.
343
00:15:46,960 --> 00:15:49,720
Yeah, sweetheart is learning.
That's actually a presidential
344
00:15:49,720 --> 00:15:50,880
quote.
Oh.
345
00:15:50,920 --> 00:15:52,520
Yeah.
Is our children learning?
346
00:15:52,560 --> 00:15:53,560
Yes.
GW.
347
00:15:53,560 --> 00:15:56,280
Yeah, my.
My daughter had it as her senior
348
00:15:56,280 --> 00:15:57,760
quote in the yearbook.
I love that.
349
00:15:57,800 --> 00:16:01,680
Yeah, it's amazing.
We also need to mention Speaking
350
00:16:01,680 --> 00:16:02,800
of accounts.
And then we're done.
351
00:16:02,800 --> 00:16:05,720
I promise.
We have an Instagram account.
352
00:16:05,920 --> 00:16:09,840
We have a a dormant TikTok, but
it it will be thriving shortly.
353
00:16:09,840 --> 00:16:11,360
You're gonna come.
Online at the weekend.
354
00:16:11,360 --> 00:16:15,320
We recorded a lot of stuff and
we're again, we're getting
355
00:16:15,320 --> 00:16:16,960
there.
We're just, you know, you're
356
00:16:16,960 --> 00:16:20,920
you're in US within the the
little seedling aspect of the
357
00:16:20,920 --> 00:16:24,040
podcast.
So you can come along with us on
358
00:16:24,040 --> 00:16:25,760
this marvelous ride.
You're charter.
359
00:16:25,760 --> 00:16:27,760
Members, Really.
You're in on the ground floor,
360
00:16:27,760 --> 00:16:30,280
yes.
Finders, founders find the
361
00:16:30,280 --> 00:16:32,320
founders member, the founder
circle.
362
00:16:32,360 --> 00:16:34,120
You're all in the Finder circle
of it.
363
00:16:34,240 --> 00:16:36,040
Well, we'll have to work on
that.
364
00:16:36,040 --> 00:16:37,920
Have like an event or something
in the future.
365
00:16:38,400 --> 00:16:42,400
And so, yeah, just like, share a
comment, follow all of the
366
00:16:42,400 --> 00:16:45,720
things if you feel so inclined.
We would be forever.
367
00:16:45,720 --> 00:16:46,760
Grateful.
Yeah.
368
00:16:46,760 --> 00:16:47,560
OK.
Thanks, friends.
369
00:16:47,560 --> 00:16:50,000
We don't love begging for likes
and comments and all of that,
370
00:16:50,000 --> 00:16:51,840
but we are trying to find an
audience.
371
00:16:52,120 --> 00:16:53,640
Making this podcast is super
fun.
372
00:16:53,640 --> 00:16:56,440
I hope you enjoy listening and
we'd love to be able to continue
373
00:16:56,440 --> 00:16:58,680
it.
So if you would like it to
374
00:16:58,680 --> 00:17:01,000
continue as well, help a hoe
out.
375
00:17:01,440 --> 00:17:03,480
Help.
Help a hoe white That would be
376
00:17:03,480 --> 00:17:08,280
amazing.
Help a hoe We'll we'll make AE
377
00:17:08,280 --> 00:17:12,920
sign so well, on that note, we
also wanted to share some of the
378
00:17:12,920 --> 00:17:15,520
comments and questions we have
gotten so far.
379
00:17:15,920 --> 00:17:17,800
And most of these have come via
text.
380
00:17:17,800 --> 00:17:20,440
And once again, feel free to
make them on our Instagram or
381
00:17:20,440 --> 00:17:23,640
the website or Spotify or Apple
or any of the things.
382
00:17:23,640 --> 00:17:26,680
So yeah, they've been wonderful
texts to get.
383
00:17:26,680 --> 00:17:29,680
So thank you friends.
Yeah, salty Bros and hoes, we're
384
00:17:29,680 --> 00:17:31,880
sharing.
I'm gonna share one because I
385
00:17:31,880 --> 00:17:34,640
feel like this is reflective of
a lot of the ones we get.
386
00:17:35,040 --> 00:17:39,160
So this is a text I got and it
says quote, I love the natural
387
00:17:39,160 --> 00:17:42,120
flow you and Claire have
together as the listener.
388
00:17:42,120 --> 00:17:45,000
It's like we're just sitting in
on a lunch date that you 2 are
389
00:17:45,000 --> 00:17:48,080
having and it feels very natural
and not scripted and I really
390
00:17:48,080 --> 00:17:50,240
enjoy it.
UN quote Thank you so much for
391
00:17:50,240 --> 00:17:52,160
that comment, that's so lovely.
It's what it feels.
392
00:17:52,160 --> 00:17:54,120
Like to us too, it is.
We're just here on a.
393
00:17:54,120 --> 00:17:57,360
Little cute lunch date.
Just chatting, chatting the
394
00:17:57,600 --> 00:17:59,240
chatting the shit.
Is that what you would say?
395
00:17:59,240 --> 00:18:00,880
What's up for you shooting the
shooting?
396
00:18:03,360 --> 00:18:05,400
But I'm gonna start saying
chatting shit.
397
00:18:06,360 --> 00:18:09,440
Some days I feel so broken I
just.
398
00:18:10,000 --> 00:18:13,320
I adore you.
My mind is a weird place.
399
00:18:13,440 --> 00:18:14,960
It's a weird.
Wonderful place.
400
00:18:15,360 --> 00:18:17,320
It's a wonderful place.
Oh dear.
401
00:18:17,320 --> 00:18:20,680
God, I'm, I'm very tired.
I will, I will use that.
402
00:18:20,680 --> 00:18:23,720
But also I'm a little quirky, so
that is fair.
403
00:18:23,720 --> 00:18:25,160
You're a delight.
I love that that's.
404
00:18:25,200 --> 00:18:27,880
Beautiful, do you have?
A comment or two to share I do.
405
00:18:27,880 --> 00:18:30,400
Because I have noticed a trend.
Oh, OK.
406
00:18:30,400 --> 00:18:33,560
Yes, we are strengthening
marriages and relationships
407
00:18:33,560 --> 00:18:34,720
everywhere.
I love that.
408
00:18:34,720 --> 00:18:37,640
For us, yes, And for you, the
listener I know.
409
00:18:38,000 --> 00:18:43,240
I got this from my friend after
they listen to episode 2.
410
00:18:43,400 --> 00:18:44,960
Oh, men who?
Don't use SOAP, yeah.
411
00:18:45,080 --> 00:18:48,040
The the infamous shitty pants
episode, one of our most.
412
00:18:48,040 --> 00:18:52,000
Popular episodes, yes.
And, you know, As for good
413
00:18:52,040 --> 00:18:56,560
reason should be question mark.
Yeah, so I got this and it said
414
00:18:56,600 --> 00:18:59,480
listen to episode 2 of your
podcast.
415
00:18:59,640 --> 00:19:04,040
What the hell, Claire?
I immediately told my husband
416
00:19:04,040 --> 00:19:07,120
how much I love him and
apologize for taking him for
417
00:19:07,120 --> 00:19:10,920
granted for his good hygiene.
Shitty pants, really.
418
00:19:11,120 --> 00:19:15,000
Oh my God.
Oh I love that.
419
00:19:15,000 --> 00:19:19,520
And then this is, oh, this is
one of my dearest friends in
420
00:19:19,520 --> 00:19:22,160
Mirka, one of the first people
like that I met when I moved
421
00:19:22,160 --> 00:19:24,320
here.
And I love her so much.
422
00:19:24,520 --> 00:19:28,400
She's so like deadpan and but
like the best humor, like she
423
00:19:28,400 --> 00:19:31,000
just drops the lines in love
deadpan.
424
00:19:31,000 --> 00:19:35,000
Like I love her humor so much.
And I've never, I've never felt
425
00:19:35,000 --> 00:19:40,160
her so effusive like so she went
on to say, seriously, you should
426
00:19:40,160 --> 00:19:45,240
see his well manicured toenails
and he wipes until he bleeds.
427
00:19:45,720 --> 00:19:48,880
I've never, ever even seen a
skid mark.
428
00:19:50,920 --> 00:19:53,360
So we're strengthening
marriages.
429
00:19:53,600 --> 00:19:57,400
We're strengthening marriages.
And she ended by saying I can't
430
00:19:57,400 --> 00:20:00,120
get divorced now.
I mean, that's fair, yes.
431
00:20:00,120 --> 00:20:02,640
Now, to be clear, we don't
advocate wiping until you bleed,
432
00:20:02,640 --> 00:20:04,120
no.
Don't, don't do that.
433
00:20:04,120 --> 00:20:07,200
But we do like the wiping part.
We do like that there's at least
434
00:20:07,200 --> 00:20:09,600
a, a tendency towards
cleanliness.
435
00:20:09,640 --> 00:20:12,720
Yes, so and pedicure.
Good job, yes.
436
00:20:12,920 --> 00:20:15,520
No clogs, No clogs.
Yeah, no dirt.
437
00:20:15,840 --> 00:20:17,200
Yes, thank you.
She doesn't get.
438
00:20:17,200 --> 00:20:19,200
Scratches up the back of her
calves in bed.
439
00:20:22,080 --> 00:20:24,040
So, so you look at us.
We're strengthening.
440
00:20:24,120 --> 00:20:26,280
Strengthening marriages by the
horror.
441
00:20:27,280 --> 00:20:30,520
All right, We've also had a few
questions that have come our
442
00:20:30,520 --> 00:20:34,280
way, so we wanted to address a
couple of those, and I'll start
443
00:20:34,280 --> 00:20:36,960
with 1.
So someone asked me, how much do
444
00:20:36,960 --> 00:20:39,640
you edit your episodes?
So in other words, how much do
445
00:20:39,640 --> 00:20:42,240
you record for one hour of the
podcast?
446
00:20:42,320 --> 00:20:45,680
Yeah, it's a great question.
And the answer is simple answer.
447
00:20:45,680 --> 00:20:47,760
Simple answer.
We do these in one take.
448
00:20:47,760 --> 00:20:50,000
We basically do not edit them at
all.
449
00:20:50,760 --> 00:20:54,040
I think there have been all of
two times where we paused
450
00:20:54,040 --> 00:20:57,120
because either we really messed
something up or there was a
451
00:20:57,280 --> 00:20:58,800
coughing fit.
There was a day.
452
00:20:58,800 --> 00:21:00,520
Of coughing.
There was a day of fit by me,
453
00:21:00,600 --> 00:21:01,280
yes.
Yeah.
454
00:21:01,600 --> 00:21:03,120
I think I might have had one too
at one point.
455
00:21:03,120 --> 00:21:05,160
Yeah.
So we just like, stopped, backed
456
00:21:05,160 --> 00:21:07,760
it up like one or two minutes
and picked it up from there.
457
00:21:07,760 --> 00:21:10,960
But basically everything you
hear is just in one take.
458
00:21:11,080 --> 00:21:13,120
Yeah.
Which might be actually quite
459
00:21:13,120 --> 00:21:15,000
obvious That's.
True.
460
00:21:15,000 --> 00:21:19,400
At times, yeah, we're like.
Maybe that doesn't surprise.
461
00:21:19,400 --> 00:21:21,760
Anyone don't?
They're like, well done.
462
00:21:22,200 --> 00:21:26,160
Of course, they're like, well,
and we have another question
463
00:21:26,160 --> 00:21:30,200
that is very much adjacent to
that question, which is how much
464
00:21:30,200 --> 00:21:32,640
of the podcast is Scripture
scriptured?
465
00:21:32,960 --> 00:21:35,200
Scriptured.
Oh, dear God, None of it going
466
00:21:35,200 --> 00:21:37,680
back to my mom and roots.
Or or we could just make it
467
00:21:37,680 --> 00:21:39,720
Scripture.
Yeah, the book of Claire and
468
00:21:39,720 --> 00:21:42,520
Mel, The book of Claire Mel.
We'll do we live scripture study
469
00:21:42,520 --> 00:21:43,600
one week.
There we go.
470
00:21:43,800 --> 00:21:47,440
Oh, God.
Oh, well, script head was what I
471
00:21:47,440 --> 00:21:51,000
meant to say.
And the answer is mostly not at
472
00:21:51,000 --> 00:21:53,240
all.
Again, maybe you can tell.
473
00:21:53,240 --> 00:21:56,040
Yes, it's like, well.
Clearly because they're all over
474
00:21:56,040 --> 00:21:58,680
the place.
But you know, we like to, we
475
00:21:58,680 --> 00:22:01,440
like to lean into the tangents
because sometimes it opens up a
476
00:22:01,440 --> 00:22:03,280
whole other beautiful story, but
fun.
477
00:22:03,440 --> 00:22:07,640
Sometimes we have a wee outline.
I will say shout out to Mel
478
00:22:07,640 --> 00:22:11,720
cause mostly when she's in
charge of the episode, there's
479
00:22:11,720 --> 00:22:14,520
like a beautiful scripted
outline.
480
00:22:14,520 --> 00:22:18,760
And when I'm leading the charge
on the I'll just normally run in
481
00:22:18,760 --> 00:22:21,240
the door 10 minutes sleep, be
like, I have some notes on my
482
00:22:21,280 --> 00:22:25,720
phone.
So Mel is the queen of, of, of
483
00:22:25,720 --> 00:22:28,560
like, you know, preparedness
sort.
484
00:22:28,640 --> 00:22:31,120
Of I mean, thank you, that's
very kind of you.
485
00:22:31,800 --> 00:22:35,400
But I will say that usually we
don't have a script exactly.
486
00:22:35,400 --> 00:22:39,080
We might script a very short or
like the outline exactly, but
487
00:22:39,080 --> 00:22:42,400
usually it's like an outline and
you all know that sometimes we
488
00:22:42,400 --> 00:22:45,320
share statistics or we might
talk about an article and then
489
00:22:45,320 --> 00:22:48,120
of course we have that in front
of us to refer to.
490
00:22:48,880 --> 00:22:52,040
But generally we have no script.
And I will also say that the
491
00:22:52,040 --> 00:22:54,960
very tiny portions that we have
tried to script before, we
492
00:22:54,960 --> 00:22:57,920
immediately go off script and
never come back.
493
00:22:58,080 --> 00:23:00,040
It's.
Like Nope, As you may have
494
00:23:00,040 --> 00:23:04,600
noticed with our introductions.
Yeah, when I still the shame of
495
00:23:04,800 --> 00:23:07,400
believing that was a hurry water
time.
496
00:23:07,400 --> 00:23:08,720
Oh, that was hilarious.
Yeah.
497
00:23:08,800 --> 00:23:13,320
So, you know, we're just we're
just, you know, putting it all
498
00:23:13,320 --> 00:23:14,880
out there.
We have our process.
499
00:23:14,880 --> 00:23:16,520
Yeah, and it works for us.
It works.
500
00:23:16,520 --> 00:23:19,760
For us, it may not work for
anybody else on the planet, but
501
00:23:19,760 --> 00:23:21,960
it works for us.
But yeah, mostly you're just
502
00:23:21,960 --> 00:23:27,040
overhearing a very genuine
conversation and we're, we're
503
00:23:27,040 --> 00:23:28,760
just here keeping it real
friends.
504
00:23:28,760 --> 00:23:35,120
Yep, Yep.
As you can see from that awkward
505
00:23:35,120 --> 00:23:38,440
pause when it's like, OK, all
right.
506
00:23:38,560 --> 00:23:42,120
We have also had a couple of
other questions, Mel, specific
507
00:23:42,120 --> 00:23:45,880
to you, OK, because they're
about Mr. 11.
508
00:23:46,440 --> 00:23:48,640
We've not chatted about him in
some time so.
509
00:23:49,280 --> 00:23:53,000
Infamous Mr. 11 Yep, I.
Have had several requests even
510
00:23:53,000 --> 00:23:56,400
to me of what does he look like?
We want to see what he looks
511
00:23:56,400 --> 00:24:00,880
like so well, give us an update
or tell us more about Mr. 11.
512
00:24:00,880 --> 00:24:03,400
OK, Well, I.
Am gonna protect this person's
513
00:24:03,560 --> 00:24:06,400
privacy in the sense that I will
not be disseminating pictures.
514
00:24:06,400 --> 00:24:07,120
Yeah, no.
Pictures.
515
00:24:07,120 --> 00:24:10,680
Sorry lads, I have.
Many, but I will be keeping them
516
00:24:10,680 --> 00:24:12,800
to myself.
Yeah, and occasionally showing
517
00:24:12,800 --> 00:24:14,880
you some of them.
Claire, thank you.
518
00:24:15,320 --> 00:24:17,720
But from the bottom.
Of my I feel like.
519
00:24:17,720 --> 00:24:19,040
Heart.
I don't know.
520
00:24:19,040 --> 00:24:21,280
I feel like when I listened to
our first episode and I felt
521
00:24:21,280 --> 00:24:23,920
like wow, that sounds like
hyperbole, but let me assure you
522
00:24:23,960 --> 00:24:25,480
it is not.
I can.
523
00:24:25,480 --> 00:24:26,760
Confirm.
Yeah, so.
524
00:24:26,760 --> 00:24:30,440
This man has been mistaken in
public when his hair was
525
00:24:30,440 --> 00:24:34,080
shorter, I'll say for Ryan
Gosling multiple times.
526
00:24:34,320 --> 00:24:34,880
Wow.
Yeah.
527
00:24:35,000 --> 00:24:36,520
So that gives.
You an idea?
528
00:24:36,520 --> 00:24:40,160
Gives you an idea.
Yeah, he's gorgeous.
529
00:24:40,160 --> 00:24:42,680
Now he's grown his hair out and
I think he looks like a Viking
530
00:24:42,680 --> 00:24:43,720
God.
He does look.
531
00:24:43,720 --> 00:24:46,280
Like a Viking gog.
A Viking GOG.
532
00:24:47,400 --> 00:24:52,080
He's a Viking dog.
Because there's just so like, my
533
00:24:52,080 --> 00:24:55,240
wee brain was going too fast for
my mic there, but because I was
534
00:24:55,240 --> 00:24:57,600
just thinking about piercing
eyes.
535
00:24:58,600 --> 00:25:03,240
Lovely hair, which is a rarity
this point in natural blonde.
536
00:25:03,240 --> 00:25:06,640
Hair yes just gorgeous 63
perfect body but.
537
00:25:07,000 --> 00:25:10,400
Yeah, it's like, you know, and
Mel has kept it classy.
538
00:25:10,400 --> 00:25:14,040
I have not seen anything that I
shouldn't be seeing, just to
539
00:25:14,040 --> 00:25:16,360
point that out.
We share some things, but not
540
00:25:16,360 --> 00:25:18,560
all things.
So but I there's things you
541
00:25:18,560 --> 00:25:20,080
don't.
Need to see in my phone no?
542
00:25:20,320 --> 00:25:22,040
And that's fine, That's that's
good.
543
00:25:22,040 --> 00:25:23,520
I just need to see your reaction
to them.
544
00:25:23,520 --> 00:25:27,480
And that's enough.
But his little chesticles, not
545
00:25:27,480 --> 00:25:31,560
to be confused with other parts.
This little testicle area is
546
00:25:31,560 --> 00:25:33,320
just so oh.
My God.
547
00:25:33,520 --> 00:25:39,160
Claire, it's just so fine
because it's not now I.
548
00:25:39,160 --> 00:25:42,040
Almost want to stop and go back
and delete this, but you know
549
00:25:42,040 --> 00:25:43,360
what?
We're not going to This is our.
550
00:25:43,360 --> 00:25:47,640
Process and I stand by it.
I feel like that is a sister a
551
00:25:47,640 --> 00:25:50,280
word my sister told me.
I am having speech problems
552
00:25:50,280 --> 00:25:53,120
today clearly, so I apologize.
I've never heard that.
553
00:25:53,120 --> 00:25:55,840
One, I've heard moobs before,
but then stuff usually like
554
00:25:55,840 --> 00:25:58,040
implies they're more like fatty.
It's not.
555
00:25:58,040 --> 00:25:59,800
Like a good thing, yeah, but
it's.
556
00:25:59,800 --> 00:26:02,880
Just.
A generic term to decide the to
557
00:26:02,880 --> 00:26:05,040
decide.
Oh my God have I had a
558
00:26:05,040 --> 00:26:12,000
neurological event to describe
that The dekotage area.
559
00:26:12,760 --> 00:26:15,640
Oh my God, I love that word.
Friends, we're not even
560
00:26:15,640 --> 00:26:18,960
drinking, but I want to now.
You know, I actually may have
561
00:26:18,960 --> 00:26:21,600
taken double meds today.
I I'm going to say that on
562
00:26:21,600 --> 00:26:25,000
accident because my wheel arm
went off, but I was in a meeting
563
00:26:25,000 --> 00:26:26,880
and I can't remember if I took
it and then I took another one
564
00:26:26,880 --> 00:26:29,320
in the way here.
So there is every chance that I
565
00:26:29,320 --> 00:26:31,920
am double adderalled up for this
episode.
566
00:26:31,920 --> 00:26:32,840
I love.
That Yep.
567
00:26:33,200 --> 00:26:35,560
So.
It's our most unhinged episode
568
00:26:35,560 --> 00:26:36,680
yet, everyone.
Yay.
569
00:26:36,760 --> 00:26:38,120
Aren't you glad you're here?
Well, the.
570
00:26:38,120 --> 00:26:42,200
Problem is, it's like my Brian
is just going so much faster
571
00:26:42,200 --> 00:26:44,760
than my mice can keep up with.
Yeah, even with an.
572
00:26:44,760 --> 00:26:46,600
Irish accent because we tend to
speak fast.
573
00:26:46,600 --> 00:26:49,160
So.
So yes, back to Mr. 11.
574
00:26:49,160 --> 00:26:51,600
Now let's move.
On I feel like we've covered Mr.
575
00:26:51,600 --> 00:26:54,640
11 in probably more detail.
Well, I we need to.
576
00:26:54,640 --> 00:26:58,160
I will just add that there are
many listeners that do hope you
577
00:26:58,160 --> 00:27:00,040
get your 711.
We'll see.
578
00:27:00,200 --> 00:27:03,640
That is not.
The prognosis isn't looking
579
00:27:03,680 --> 00:27:07,080
really good at this point.
Well, we will live in hope.
580
00:27:07,360 --> 00:27:09,040
Stay, stay.
Posted Stay tuned.
581
00:27:09,520 --> 00:27:10,720
Stay tuned.
All right, let's.
582
00:27:10,880 --> 00:27:15,160
Move on to.
A serious a serious topic.
583
00:27:15,200 --> 00:27:16,680
I regret answering that
question.
584
00:27:17,720 --> 00:27:20,320
Sorry, I took that really
sideways today.
585
00:27:20,600 --> 00:27:21,480
That's all right.
I.
586
00:27:21,640 --> 00:27:23,440
I love it.
OK, I sort of love it.
587
00:27:23,440 --> 00:27:25,400
I'm so glad you.
Do let's get you're like, sort
588
00:27:25,400 --> 00:27:28,240
of, let's get to the meat.
Of our podcast OK, the meat, the
589
00:27:28,400 --> 00:27:33,000
meat, the 68 inches of our
podcast today we had planned to
590
00:27:33,440 --> 00:27:35,840
kind of talk about the male
loneliness epidemic.
591
00:27:35,920 --> 00:27:37,440
There's a phrase we've all
heard, right?
592
00:27:37,720 --> 00:27:39,440
I feel like.
I just want to play a little
593
00:27:39,440 --> 00:27:41,840
violin music here, but yeah,
tiny.
594
00:27:41,840 --> 00:27:44,840
Violin a wee.
Tiny little small one.
595
00:27:45,440 --> 00:27:46,600
Yep.
Yeah.
596
00:27:47,240 --> 00:27:50,000
All right, well, do you think
this is a real thing you.
597
00:27:50,000 --> 00:27:57,400
Know yes and no OK because sure
they're lonely and also yes like
598
00:27:57,400 --> 00:28:01,600
some of them but but like why
this is what I would like to get
599
00:28:01,600 --> 00:28:05,040
to because I feel like a lot of
things you know women are blamed
600
00:28:05,040 --> 00:28:09,920
for this but the men's are
definitely feeling lonely and as
601
00:28:09,920 --> 00:28:13,480
we love a good data set we have
some Pew stats because we love
602
00:28:13,480 --> 00:28:18,840
Pew in particular hell yeah yes
from 2025 S these are recent hot
603
00:28:18,880 --> 00:28:24,000
off the press hot off the press
that shows 16% of men and 15% of
604
00:28:24,000 --> 00:28:29,000
women feel lonely or isolated
almost all of the time so that's
605
00:28:29,000 --> 00:28:32,360
pretty equal.
That's 16 versus 15%, yes.
606
00:28:32,360 --> 00:28:36,000
So maybe we should call this a
person loneliness epidemic, not
607
00:28:36,000 --> 00:28:38,320
a male loneliness epidemic, I
mean.
608
00:28:38,560 --> 00:28:42,400
I you and I both have experience
with data and a 1% difference
609
00:28:42,440 --> 00:28:45,400
does not feel notable in this
particular instance.
610
00:28:45,400 --> 00:28:47,400
I mean, it may.
Be within the margin of error
611
00:28:47,400 --> 00:28:49,560
for a study like this.
I don't know how big the sample
612
00:28:49,560 --> 00:28:53,000
size was, but that seems like
it's probably the same.
613
00:28:53,320 --> 00:28:55,560
So we we're we're.
Basically all lonely.
614
00:28:55,560 --> 00:28:58,960
So, well, some humans.
Are lonely, I mean 15 or 16%
615
00:28:59,320 --> 00:29:01,760
feeling lonely most of the time,
I mean that is quite sad for
616
00:29:01,760 --> 00:29:03,440
them.
Yes, I don't love that.
617
00:29:03,440 --> 00:29:08,000
And yes, you know, 15% isn't a
majority by any means, but it's
618
00:29:08,240 --> 00:29:10,880
a sizable chunk.
And I think what's key there is
619
00:29:10,880 --> 00:29:15,120
like all the time, yeah, because
obviously we'll get vulnerable
620
00:29:15,120 --> 00:29:17,920
here.
We we all feel it at some point
621
00:29:18,000 --> 00:29:20,560
right in, in some degree or
another.
622
00:29:20,880 --> 00:29:23,240
So, yeah.
What, what does that look like
623
00:29:23,240 --> 00:29:24,200
for you?
Well, yeah, I.
624
00:29:24,200 --> 00:29:27,360
Mean, especially if you're
single, right, That my days are
625
00:29:27,360 --> 00:29:28,520
pretty busy.
Yeah.
626
00:29:28,600 --> 00:29:32,600
I have a wide circle of friends
and I have a number of really
627
00:29:32,600 --> 00:29:35,160
close friends that I see
multiple times a week.
628
00:29:35,280 --> 00:29:38,800
So I wouldn't say that, you
know, I'm definitely not in this
629
00:29:38,840 --> 00:29:42,800
15 or 16%.
Like I am not lonely most of the
630
00:29:42,800 --> 00:29:43,400
time.
Yeah.
631
00:29:43,560 --> 00:29:47,000
I feel surrounded by people who
I love, who love me.
632
00:29:47,000 --> 00:29:48,440
I feel supported.
Yeah.
633
00:29:48,480 --> 00:29:50,200
I feel great.
You know, I have my son with me
634
00:29:50,200 --> 00:29:52,160
a lot of the times, so there's
that as well.
635
00:29:52,160 --> 00:29:53,400
Yeah.
But you know what?
636
00:29:53,400 --> 00:29:56,000
There are times like when I
don't have my son or after he's
637
00:29:56,000 --> 00:29:58,800
gone to bed and you're sitting
there on the couch all alone and
638
00:29:58,800 --> 00:30:02,760
you're like, well, kind of would
be nice to have somebody sitting
639
00:30:02,760 --> 00:30:04,040
next to me.
Yes.
640
00:30:04,280 --> 00:30:08,440
That's fair and very relatable
and it it'll catch you at like
641
00:30:08,520 --> 00:30:12,600
wee moments.
So, you know, like you, I, I
642
00:30:12,600 --> 00:30:15,360
have a very busy life and it's
very busier than mine.
643
00:30:15,440 --> 00:30:16,000
For sure.
Well.
644
00:30:16,280 --> 00:30:22,440
Probably not with as much fun
things because you know, as as
645
00:30:22,440 --> 00:30:26,320
you can tell, I I you know, I
don't maybe think the most
646
00:30:26,320 --> 00:30:29,840
straight of lots of humans and
take a lot on, but mostly
647
00:30:29,840 --> 00:30:32,600
enjoyable things.
But you know, good friends
648
00:30:32,720 --> 00:30:35,120
support.
I speak to my sister, even
649
00:30:35,120 --> 00:30:36,560
though she's 5 1/2 thousand
miles away.
650
00:30:36,560 --> 00:30:39,360
We talk every morning.
I usually call her my way into
651
00:30:39,360 --> 00:30:41,080
work.
We have a little video call,
652
00:30:41,080 --> 00:30:43,320
which is probably quite
dangerous, but I just sat her
653
00:30:43,320 --> 00:30:45,760
there.
She watches me drive, she
654
00:30:45,760 --> 00:30:47,000
watches me drive.
I kind.
655
00:30:47,000 --> 00:30:49,080
Of love that that's really sweet
so I.
656
00:30:49,080 --> 00:30:54,200
Do have close relationships, my
kids, one of my kids lives far
657
00:30:54,200 --> 00:30:57,960
away in Mirka, one of them is in
Ireland right now for her
658
00:30:57,960 --> 00:31:02,000
masters and my wee son is back
home for a semester, which I
659
00:31:02,000 --> 00:31:04,480
love.
But there are those moments.
660
00:31:04,560 --> 00:31:07,160
I had one just last night tell
me.
661
00:31:07,320 --> 00:31:10,440
So yesterday was a really rough
day.
662
00:31:10,440 --> 00:31:13,640
It was just sorry.
Well, it was just like there was
663
00:31:13,640 --> 00:31:18,520
just a lot happening and it was
very like emotionally draining.
664
00:31:18,800 --> 00:31:21,160
It was also just a very, very
long day.
665
00:31:21,480 --> 00:31:26,880
And I also had like a three hour
night class in, in a, in a
666
00:31:26,880 --> 00:31:30,560
topic, shall we say, that I'm
not very proficient in.
667
00:31:31,000 --> 00:31:34,440
And I love to learn new things,
but it's deeply challenging,
668
00:31:34,440 --> 00:31:38,120
especially when I've been like,
at work all day long, it sounds.
669
00:31:38,120 --> 00:31:41,160
Very tiring.
And I will also say that a three
670
00:31:41,160 --> 00:31:45,480
hour class is kind of a lot.
I've taught a three hour class
671
00:31:45,560 --> 00:31:47,920
before and Oh my God.
And there are.
672
00:31:47,920 --> 00:31:51,560
Some professors who have a
lengthy break and or finish
673
00:31:51,560 --> 00:31:54,200
early.
This particular 1 does not.
674
00:31:54,880 --> 00:31:58,560
And I appreciate the rigor I do.
I really do like I am learning
675
00:31:58,560 --> 00:32:03,440
so much and and last week I left
elated and last night before I
676
00:32:03,440 --> 00:32:07,640
even got there I I just felt
like I wanted to cry but also
677
00:32:07,640 --> 00:32:11,000
that I was like so tired that I
actually couldn't perform the
678
00:32:11,000 --> 00:32:13,120
function.
Too tired?
679
00:32:13,240 --> 00:32:15,680
Yes, And I.
Had like a wee headache and then
680
00:32:15,680 --> 00:32:19,720
I had the realization as I was
driving up to EU that oh, you
681
00:32:19,760 --> 00:32:23,800
actually haven't eaten apart
from 2 little Abe's muffins
682
00:32:23,800 --> 00:32:25,640
today.
Shout out to Abe's muffins.
683
00:32:25,640 --> 00:32:29,040
So good.
But that was not product
684
00:32:29,040 --> 00:32:29,760
placement.
By the way.
685
00:32:29,920 --> 00:32:31,240
They should sponsor.
Us they should.
686
00:32:31,400 --> 00:32:32,800
Because their muffins are really
good.
687
00:32:32,800 --> 00:32:34,280
I haven't tried.
Them I don't know what's.
688
00:32:34,280 --> 00:32:36,600
In them because they're
literally free from everything.
689
00:32:36,600 --> 00:32:39,000
I'm like, are they made out of
sawdust?
690
00:32:39,280 --> 00:32:40,960
But they don't.
They're moist.
691
00:32:41,720 --> 00:32:44,000
I will say the word well,
they're very moist.
692
00:32:44,240 --> 00:32:45,360
I don't mind.
That word yes, I.
693
00:32:45,360 --> 00:32:50,320
Like a little moistness.
So so yes, I got there and I
694
00:32:50,320 --> 00:32:54,880
honestly just felt terrible.
I had overdone it this weekend
695
00:32:54,920 --> 00:32:58,000
on the Inferno Pilates.
I'm going to sober all.
696
00:32:58,320 --> 00:33:01,600
It's like, weirdly, my
relaxation when I'm very tired,
697
00:33:01,600 --> 00:33:04,280
which is stupid and doesn't make
any sense.
698
00:33:05,080 --> 00:33:08,400
It's like I'm exhausted.
So let's go to a class that is
699
00:33:08,400 --> 00:33:12,160
in 103 degree heat and deeply
taxing.
700
00:33:12,440 --> 00:33:15,400
And yeah, it's probably not an
effective way to relax, but,
701
00:33:15,440 --> 00:33:17,320
well, I can't think of worse.
Ways to relax.
702
00:33:17,320 --> 00:33:19,240
I mean, at least you're not, I
don't know, drinking a whole
703
00:33:19,240 --> 00:33:20,920
bottle of wine by yourself.
That's true.
704
00:33:20,960 --> 00:33:24,720
Or that's true, you know, at
home, smoking weed, doing
705
00:33:24,720 --> 00:33:29,360
animals, using your crack pipe.
Only if I match with that dude
706
00:33:29,440 --> 00:33:32,800
or your dude CR salty bites for
more info.
707
00:33:33,160 --> 00:33:37,000
But yeah, it's I'm this story is
taking way too long.
708
00:33:37,280 --> 00:33:40,680
Needless to say, it was a hard
day and I was sitting in the
709
00:33:40,680 --> 00:33:43,080
class.
I was jiggling my leg to stay
710
00:33:43,080 --> 00:33:45,640
awake because I kept doing the
bobbing head thing.
711
00:33:45,640 --> 00:33:48,440
I hate that.
And I was like, everything hurts
712
00:33:48,440 --> 00:33:50,320
and I'm so hungry.
And I just thought, you know
713
00:33:50,320 --> 00:33:53,720
what, I would love to go home
and for somebody just to wrap me
714
00:33:53,720 --> 00:33:57,080
in a blanket and give me food.
Yes, that's all I wanted.
715
00:33:57,480 --> 00:33:59,360
I just wanted to be wrapped in a
blanket.
716
00:33:59,360 --> 00:34:02,960
I didn't care what the food was.
I just needed food.
717
00:34:03,440 --> 00:34:05,760
Oh my.
God, girl, that hits so deep.
718
00:34:05,760 --> 00:34:09,840
Yeah, it is hard to do
everything yourself all the.
719
00:34:09,840 --> 00:34:11,000
Things.
Yeah.
720
00:34:11,000 --> 00:34:13,440
And I I.
Love having someone to take care
721
00:34:13,440 --> 00:34:16,760
of, but I love when they want to
take care of me too.
722
00:34:16,760 --> 00:34:17,719
Yes.
Yeah.
723
00:34:17,719 --> 00:34:21,280
And I think neither of us maybe
had that as a should we say it
724
00:34:21,280 --> 00:34:23,840
wasn't the number one?
Feature of our marriage.
725
00:34:24,159 --> 00:34:27,960
Is necessarily it was not or any
subsequent.
726
00:34:28,080 --> 00:34:31,440
Had relationships, which was
what like snapped me right back
727
00:34:31,560 --> 00:34:35,719
because I was like, oh wait, in
any of your relationships,
728
00:34:35,719 --> 00:34:38,440
including especially Mr. Shitty
Pants, I would have been going
729
00:34:38,440 --> 00:34:41,800
home to make him dinner.
So you know, and that's also on
730
00:34:41,800 --> 00:34:44,400
me, But you know, that snaps you
back real quick.
731
00:34:44,400 --> 00:34:47,120
So you probably would have taken
an Uber because he had your car.
732
00:34:50,159 --> 00:34:52,040
And then you would have had to
cook something.
733
00:34:53,320 --> 00:34:56,480
But had the Uber stop at the
store and then use my money.
734
00:34:58,720 --> 00:35:02,560
Oh my God.
And then the cherry and top gone
735
00:35:02,560 --> 00:35:06,440
home and cleaned up his shit.
Taking his pants into the
736
00:35:06,440 --> 00:35:09,120
shower.
Oh my God, for decontamination.
737
00:35:10,160 --> 00:35:15,160
It was a beautiful light.
I mean, Oh dear God, being
738
00:35:15,200 --> 00:35:16,760
single isn't the worst thing out
there.
739
00:35:16,800 --> 00:35:19,160
Y'all, it's actually not.
And like you say, those
740
00:35:19,160 --> 00:35:22,880
recollections will snap you back
from from the brink of
741
00:35:22,880 --> 00:35:24,720
loneliness.
So I just.
742
00:35:24,920 --> 00:35:26,240
Yeah, Yeah.
But we do.
743
00:35:26,240 --> 00:35:29,000
Know and believe that there are
men out there, yes, that are not
744
00:35:29,000 --> 00:35:32,080
like that who would in fact.
Wrap you in a blanket and get
745
00:35:32,080 --> 00:35:34,320
you food.
And give you a hug, yes.
746
00:35:34,320 --> 00:35:38,240
And just listen to you, yes.
Like, cuz I, I at that point, I
747
00:35:38,240 --> 00:35:41,560
would have just came home and,
like, you know, sobbed and said
748
00:35:42,280 --> 00:35:44,400
incomprehensible things.
But then I would have felt
749
00:35:44,400 --> 00:35:45,800
better.
Yes.
750
00:35:46,520 --> 00:35:48,960
So instead I got home and
realized that I hadn't done
751
00:35:49,360 --> 00:35:53,920
homework on birth rates and
poverty and developing nations.
752
00:35:53,920 --> 00:35:58,320
So I just pulled the car over.
I ordered a Chipotle bowl.
753
00:35:58,320 --> 00:36:01,080
Thank you, Chipotle.
And I picked it up in the drive
754
00:36:01,080 --> 00:36:03,440
through.
And I wrapped myself in a
755
00:36:03,440 --> 00:36:07,880
blanket and watched my little
PowerPoint lecture on double
756
00:36:07,880 --> 00:36:09,680
speed.
Oh, my God, Yeah.
757
00:36:10,000 --> 00:36:12,720
It was a good night.
Sure.
758
00:36:13,800 --> 00:36:18,280
OK, I just decided that when
these classes are over, I am
759
00:36:18,280 --> 00:36:20,600
taking you for a spa day.
You're so sweet.
760
00:36:20,600 --> 00:36:21,920
For real.
You need it so.
761
00:36:23,080 --> 00:36:24,600
You're like, it is an
intervention.
762
00:36:24,640 --> 00:36:26,560
I mean I.
Feel like if I suggested it
763
00:36:26,560 --> 00:36:28,200
right now, you'd be like, no, I
don't have time.
764
00:36:28,200 --> 00:36:30,200
I need to write.
That would be like take five
765
00:36:30,200 --> 00:36:33,600
classes and teach 3 yoga classes
and all this stuff that when
766
00:36:33,800 --> 00:36:36,360
things calm down a little bit,
we're going to the spa.
767
00:36:36,480 --> 00:36:38,200
You're wee Tim.
I'll take it.
768
00:36:38,360 --> 00:36:39,240
Thank you.
OK, good.
769
00:36:39,240 --> 00:36:41,680
I will take it.
You need it, I know so not.
770
00:36:41,680 --> 00:36:43,280
Much time to get lonely, though.
That's.
771
00:36:43,280 --> 00:36:46,320
That's the upside, right?
Yeah, I guess so.
772
00:36:46,360 --> 00:36:49,480
Yeah, Yeah, we have.
We have mentioned the skin
773
00:36:49,480 --> 00:36:53,880
hunger before and to be clear
sometimes it comes in the form
774
00:36:53,920 --> 00:36:59,400
of sex but other times it it's
just in, you know, being.
775
00:36:59,400 --> 00:37:01,840
Held hugs and stuff or a foot
rub.
776
00:37:02,200 --> 00:37:03,440
Yeah, or we neck.
Rub.
777
00:37:03,840 --> 00:37:06,200
Yeah.
Something back, Scratch some
778
00:37:06,200 --> 00:37:08,600
touch something.
That'd be nice, yeah.
779
00:37:09,080 --> 00:37:13,560
So when these moments hit, how
do you like deal with them?
780
00:37:14,760 --> 00:37:19,160
Well, I don't do Pilates,
Inferno or whatever that is.
781
00:37:19,160 --> 00:37:22,800
Maybe I should?
Yes, because you're just so
782
00:37:22,800 --> 00:37:25,800
deadbeat after that.
You're like, you'll just
783
00:37:25,800 --> 00:37:28,040
collapse into a heap.
And yeah, I mean.
784
00:37:28,040 --> 00:37:32,400
I would say that my normal go to
method is to distract myself.
785
00:37:32,400 --> 00:37:34,560
Yeah.
So I'll, I don't know, turn on
786
00:37:34,560 --> 00:37:36,760
an episode of Real Housewives.
Sorry.
787
00:37:36,880 --> 00:37:41,240
Yeah, I don't know, like try to
read a book or doom scroll on
788
00:37:41,240 --> 00:37:43,080
Instagram.
I don't know, just anything to
789
00:37:43,080 --> 00:37:46,000
like, take my mind off it.
Maybe that's not the most
790
00:37:46,000 --> 00:37:49,120
healthy way to cope with it.
It's not.
791
00:37:49,160 --> 00:37:50,640
Unhealthy.
It's not terrible.
792
00:37:50,640 --> 00:37:52,600
I mean, again, it's not the
Crack Pipe, it's not a whole
793
00:37:52,600 --> 00:37:55,480
bottle of wine, right?
It's not dragging myself into
794
00:37:55,560 --> 00:37:58,760
oblivion.
Yes, But yeah, I, I, I.
795
00:37:58,760 --> 00:38:04,280
Have received the advice from
therapists that distraction is
796
00:38:04,280 --> 00:38:08,400
actually a really good thing to
do when you're you feel like
797
00:38:08,400 --> 00:38:11,880
either you're spiraling, whether
that's loneliness or stress or
798
00:38:11,880 --> 00:38:14,880
worrying over a certain thing.
So, you know, I think that's a
799
00:38:14,880 --> 00:38:18,520
tried and true method, yeah.
I think that as long as it's not
800
00:38:18,520 --> 00:38:20,400
the only method you're
deploying, right?
801
00:38:20,400 --> 00:38:24,160
If you're distracting instead of
trying to, you know, do the work
802
00:38:24,160 --> 00:38:26,360
or solve the problem or
whatever, and that's all you do,
803
00:38:26,360 --> 00:38:28,880
then maybe that's not the best.
But I agree with like sometimes
804
00:38:28,880 --> 00:38:31,240
in the moment it's like, well,
what am I gonna do now?
805
00:38:31,240 --> 00:38:32,840
Like get on Tinder and find a
hookup?
806
00:38:32,840 --> 00:38:34,640
Probably not.
Yes, probably.
807
00:38:34,640 --> 00:38:38,240
Not mostly because there's not a
lot of options.
808
00:38:38,280 --> 00:38:39,880
Well, yeah, I mean, that's part
of it.
809
00:38:39,880 --> 00:38:42,480
Cuz then you're like, oh God, I
would like, I do like sift
810
00:38:42,480 --> 00:38:45,920
through the dumpster fire on
Tinder to even find someone.
811
00:38:45,920 --> 00:38:48,680
I would want to, you know, I
mean, by that time it's bedtime.
812
00:38:48,760 --> 00:38:50,400
Yeah, I'm tired.
You're just like, I'm tired and
813
00:38:50,400 --> 00:38:54,640
go to sleep and typically.
I, you know, I don't want to be
814
00:38:54,640 --> 00:39:00,000
little like mental health or any
like big things, but it's, I
815
00:39:00,000 --> 00:39:04,640
think it's generally true that
like a snack and a sleep, yeah,
816
00:39:04,640 --> 00:39:08,760
they solve a lot.
Not solve entirely, but you will
817
00:39:08,840 --> 00:39:11,160
feel better after both of these
things.
818
00:39:11,160 --> 00:39:11,680
Yeah.
Or.
819
00:39:11,880 --> 00:39:14,520
A We walk, yeah.
Look at me.
820
00:39:14,520 --> 00:39:16,640
He's like me again.
She's like.
821
00:39:16,840 --> 00:39:20,520
Please let that be the only
thing that rubs off and not the
822
00:39:20,520 --> 00:39:24,160
weirdness of words and racing
brain.
823
00:39:24,320 --> 00:39:26,760
I love your chaotic energy.
It's very.
824
00:39:26,800 --> 00:39:28,400
Attractive it is a little.
Chaotic.
825
00:39:28,520 --> 00:39:31,200
This may be why I don't get a
lot of deets, but yeah.
826
00:39:31,200 --> 00:39:34,800
I don't think that's why.
Yeah, there there could be a
827
00:39:34,800 --> 00:39:37,880
whole multitude of reasons so.
I think the reason is that
828
00:39:37,880 --> 00:39:40,720
you're you're picky and a lot of
men that would like to date you
829
00:39:40,720 --> 00:39:43,400
don't meet your standards.
Let's go with that.
830
00:39:43,400 --> 00:39:45,520
I don't like it, too picky.
I'm not saying that.
831
00:39:45,560 --> 00:39:46,040
Oh no.
I'm.
832
00:39:46,040 --> 00:39:49,440
Not, but I like.
I should have been more picky,
833
00:39:49,560 --> 00:39:51,400
yeah.
In the past, yeah, it is.
834
00:39:51,400 --> 00:39:54,880
True years of dating breaks and
therapy that I have and I
835
00:39:54,920 --> 00:39:59,680
learned to actually be picky and
not be like oh look red flag let
836
00:39:59,680 --> 00:40:02,000
me help you carry that I can
save.
837
00:40:02,200 --> 00:40:03,440
You.
Oh.
838
00:40:03,800 --> 00:40:06,360
Bouquet of red flags for me, I
will.
839
00:40:06,360 --> 00:40:09,960
Carry all of them.
You must have rest, my love.
840
00:40:10,000 --> 00:40:11,480
Yeah.
No, we're not doing that again.
841
00:40:11,480 --> 00:40:12,680
No more.
Of that we're not.
842
00:40:12,680 --> 00:40:14,280
We're not doing that.
That's all done.
843
00:40:14,320 --> 00:40:17,120
That's all done.
So what I'm hearing is that
844
00:40:17,120 --> 00:40:19,280
maybe some of these techniques
actually work.
845
00:40:19,880 --> 00:40:23,360
Yeah, I think.
So yeah, I don't know, maybe so.
846
00:40:23,360 --> 00:40:26,640
What are the men's doing?
Why is the focus on the men's
847
00:40:26,920 --> 00:40:29,080
loneliness?
That's a great question.
848
00:40:29,080 --> 00:40:33,000
And I think it's just, I don't
know, institutionalized sexism.
849
00:40:33,280 --> 00:40:34,880
Yeah, cuz.
Why is everything our fault?
850
00:40:34,880 --> 00:40:36,760
My God, I'm so tired of it.
Right.
851
00:40:36,760 --> 00:40:38,440
Like.
Apparently, they're the ones
852
00:40:38,480 --> 00:40:41,840
with the, you know, big tragedy
that's happening, The loneliness
853
00:40:41,960 --> 00:40:43,480
epidemic.
Yeah.
854
00:40:43,480 --> 00:40:45,160
When women are lonely at the
same rate.
855
00:40:45,200 --> 00:40:46,840
Yeah.
Be clear then.
856
00:40:46,840 --> 00:40:49,720
Second, you're right.
Like, it's portrayed as our
857
00:40:49,720 --> 00:40:51,880
fault, right?
They can't attract a woman
858
00:40:51,880 --> 00:40:55,000
because now we're too picky.
We're too educated, right?
859
00:40:55,000 --> 00:40:56,720
We're not willing to take care
of them.
860
00:40:57,160 --> 00:40:59,080
Right.
A lot of divorces are initiated
861
00:40:59,080 --> 00:41:00,240
by women.
Yeah.
862
00:41:00,360 --> 00:41:05,080
And somehow, like we are
responsible, apparently, for
863
00:41:05,080 --> 00:41:06,920
their emotional regulation.
Yeah.
864
00:41:07,800 --> 00:41:12,360
And you know, just thinking of
some not data sets, but personal
865
00:41:12,360 --> 00:41:18,000
anecdotes, yes, of, you know,
I'm thinking of my text friend
866
00:41:18,280 --> 00:41:21,200
in a text friend in particular.
Yes.
867
00:41:21,240 --> 00:41:22,800
Do we have a nickname for your
text friend?
868
00:41:23,360 --> 00:41:24,920
I think.
We should call him Mr.
869
00:41:24,920 --> 00:41:28,440
Clydesdale.
Mr. Clydesdale yes, I like it.
870
00:41:28,440 --> 00:41:29,840
Or.
Say it's the year of.
871
00:41:29,840 --> 00:41:32,360
The Fire Horse.
So it's the year of the fire
872
00:41:32,360 --> 00:41:33,120
horse.
Yes.
873
00:41:33,120 --> 00:41:36,040
You know, I'm, I feel like I
imprinted on the Budweiser
874
00:41:36,040 --> 00:41:38,640
Clydesdales in like my earlier
years.
875
00:41:38,640 --> 00:41:40,000
This actually makes me like him
more.
876
00:41:40,000 --> 00:41:41,920
I'm not sure if I like that.
Is this good?
877
00:41:42,120 --> 00:41:44,720
Well, you know, one thing that
we do know about each other is
878
00:41:44,720 --> 00:41:49,240
that we do enable each other and
we still haven't concluded if
879
00:41:49,240 --> 00:41:51,400
that is like a good thing or a
bad thing.
880
00:41:51,440 --> 00:41:54,160
Well, it's a.
Thing it's a thing and I like it
881
00:41:54,360 --> 00:41:56,360
cuz we.
Understand each other in a way
882
00:41:56,640 --> 00:42:00,240
that maybe some of our friends
don't understand us, right?
883
00:42:00,360 --> 00:42:04,680
That may question our choices,
choices and activities.
884
00:42:04,680 --> 00:42:05,960
Sanity.
But we.
885
00:42:06,360 --> 00:42:11,440
Understand on a deeper level and
you get me and we get our our
886
00:42:11,480 --> 00:42:15,840
relative situations OK.
So, Mr. Closedale, well, here's.
887
00:42:15,840 --> 00:42:18,480
The thing like, I just don't
understand, right?
888
00:42:18,920 --> 00:42:23,080
Like we have chemistry, which we
have both talked about like this
889
00:42:23,080 --> 00:42:25,200
isn't just me going, oh, we have
chemistry.
890
00:42:25,200 --> 00:42:29,840
Like he has verified that he
heals the chemistry.
891
00:42:29,840 --> 00:42:32,720
And in fact, recently we just
had a conversation where he was
892
00:42:32,720 --> 00:42:35,480
like, I, you know, I feel such
chemistry with you.
893
00:42:35,480 --> 00:42:40,520
And it's, it's it's so unusual
for that to happen, right?
894
00:42:40,520 --> 00:42:43,840
Like, it doesn't happen often,
which I would agree.
895
00:42:43,840 --> 00:42:45,760
You know, sometimes you just
meet a person and you're like,
896
00:42:45,760 --> 00:42:47,640
wee and, yeah, it just clicks
you.
897
00:42:47,920 --> 00:42:51,120
Or it could be your nervous
system completely dysregulated
898
00:42:51,120 --> 00:42:53,760
and indicating danger to you.
But either way, you have a
899
00:42:53,760 --> 00:42:55,320
feeling.
I know.
900
00:42:55,320 --> 00:42:58,120
Oh, I feel something spicy.
I'm not dead inside, Right.
901
00:42:58,840 --> 00:43:01,960
It's like, oh, my loinstereus.
My God.
902
00:43:01,960 --> 00:43:04,400
Yeah, I have a pulse.
It's a rare feeling.
903
00:43:04,400 --> 00:43:05,840
It is.
So I get it right.
904
00:43:05,840 --> 00:43:07,560
You want to lean into that and
so.
905
00:43:07,560 --> 00:43:11,440
That was my next this question.
I was like, OK, so you're having
906
00:43:11,440 --> 00:43:14,280
such a hard time, like setting
up a coffee date with me.
907
00:43:14,280 --> 00:43:16,360
I'm just like, what am I
missing?
908
00:43:17,160 --> 00:43:19,200
Like, what am I missing?
Why is this so hard?
909
00:43:19,440 --> 00:43:21,480
And of course, the obvious
answer could be he's
910
00:43:21,480 --> 00:43:25,440
bullshitting me.
And you know, it just enjoys
911
00:43:25,440 --> 00:43:29,160
whatever little dopamine hit our
little texting friendship gives
912
00:43:29,160 --> 00:43:32,840
him.
But you know, then I hear other
913
00:43:32,840 --> 00:43:37,440
things that are going on for him
and I'm like, wow, it's their
914
00:43:37,440 --> 00:43:38,320
connection.
Now.
915
00:43:38,320 --> 00:43:42,120
I am not sharing that he has
ever shared with me that he's
916
00:43:42,120 --> 00:43:45,960
lonely because he is not.
It's mostly a work issue.
917
00:43:45,960 --> 00:43:48,600
Oh, OK.
And I think it's interesting in
918
00:43:48,600 --> 00:43:53,360
the context of the male
loneliness epidemic because I
919
00:43:53,360 --> 00:43:58,200
think a lot of men lean on work
or can lean on work.
920
00:43:58,600 --> 00:44:03,240
And I understand that probably
thinking evolutionary, speaking
921
00:44:03,360 --> 00:44:04,760
evolutionarily.
What?
922
00:44:04,760 --> 00:44:06,640
What word am I trying to say?
Jesus, help me.
923
00:44:06,640 --> 00:44:08,120
I mean, now you're talking my
language.
924
00:44:08,120 --> 00:44:10,400
Yeah, evolutionarily, I did.
I give you a boner?
925
00:44:11,040 --> 00:44:14,440
Well, no.
Yes, that word.
926
00:44:14,760 --> 00:44:17,680
It's like, you know, I get that
they want to maybe even
927
00:44:17,680 --> 00:44:19,840
subconsciously be like, I am a
good provider.
928
00:44:19,840 --> 00:44:22,520
Look how busy I am.
Like, interesting.
929
00:44:22,520 --> 00:44:25,720
Yeah.
And I respect this man, what he
930
00:44:25,720 --> 00:44:28,520
does, very talented, blah, blah,
blah.
931
00:44:28,840 --> 00:44:31,880
But you know, Yeah, well, and it
is sexy for them to.
932
00:44:31,880 --> 00:44:34,920
Have something going on?
Well, yes, a job, right?
933
00:44:34,960 --> 00:44:36,520
Let's just start there.
No start.
934
00:44:36,560 --> 00:44:39,720
No homosexuals, no sexuals.
Yeah.
935
00:44:39,720 --> 00:44:41,480
I mean, Fermi has a car and a
home.
936
00:44:41,600 --> 00:44:42,240
Yeah.
Good.
937
00:44:42,240 --> 00:44:44,480
In fact, more than one.
So yeah, that's nice.
938
00:44:44,480 --> 00:44:45,440
Yeah, Very nice.
Yeah.
939
00:44:45,760 --> 00:44:48,640
And, and not just having a job,
but being good at what they do.
940
00:44:48,680 --> 00:44:50,880
Yes.
That's actually hot, really hot.
941
00:44:50,880 --> 00:44:52,360
And it doesn't matter what that
is.
942
00:44:52,360 --> 00:44:52,960
Yeah.
Or.
943
00:44:52,960 --> 00:44:55,800
Like and or like having some.
Ambition, right?
944
00:44:55,800 --> 00:44:58,240
Like sort of caring about, yeah,
what you're doing.
945
00:44:58,240 --> 00:45:00,480
Like this stuff, it's sexy.
It is.
946
00:45:00,640 --> 00:45:02,320
And like, they could be an
accountant.
947
00:45:02,680 --> 00:45:06,840
They could be a milkman, Yes,
they could be whatever.
948
00:45:07,400 --> 00:45:11,360
Do we even have milkman anymore?
Well, that's a good.
949
00:45:11,360 --> 00:45:14,240
Question and I think Winder
Dairy still delivers milk so
950
00:45:14,240 --> 00:45:17,120
maybe he could work for that
unless COVID till that I have no
951
00:45:17,120 --> 00:45:20,680
idea.
But regardless, it's it's hot.
952
00:45:20,840 --> 00:45:25,920
It is, but also we don't want
Mr. 9 to 5 dead behind the eyes.
953
00:45:26,000 --> 00:45:29,520
Yeah.
Because it's just like is really
954
00:45:29,520 --> 00:45:31,720
like your whole personhood, your
job.
955
00:45:32,320 --> 00:45:35,200
That's that's not hot.
That cuts Steve that.
956
00:45:35,280 --> 00:45:40,560
Yeah, Yeah.
So that's, that's where I'm at
957
00:45:40,560 --> 00:45:42,640
with that.
It's like, well, again, not that
958
00:45:42,640 --> 00:45:46,160
I'm saying he he has expressed
loneliness, but if the men are
959
00:45:46,160 --> 00:45:48,840
alone, is it really all our
fault?
960
00:45:48,840 --> 00:45:50,160
I don't think it is all our
fault.
961
00:45:50,160 --> 00:45:53,320
And it sounds to me.
Like Mr. Clydesdale does a thing
962
00:45:53,320 --> 00:45:56,760
that Mister Levin also likes to
do, which is, I don't know if
963
00:45:56,760 --> 00:45:58,800
this is the real name for it,
but like this rubber banding
964
00:45:58,800 --> 00:46:01,520
thing, right where you come
really close, right.
965
00:46:01,520 --> 00:46:03,320
Things are great.
Yeah.
966
00:46:04,960 --> 00:46:07,200
You're like, Oh no, girl, I it
was not close.
967
00:46:07,200 --> 00:46:09,200
It was.
Yeah, anyway, sorry, carry on.
968
00:46:09,200 --> 00:46:13,520
And then for whatever reason.
They like just fuck off.
969
00:46:13,520 --> 00:46:16,120
They're like goodbye.
And you're like, wait, yeah,
970
00:46:16,200 --> 00:46:18,240
what?
And and it's sometimes it could
971
00:46:18,240 --> 00:46:19,760
be different reasons, like who
knows?
972
00:46:19,760 --> 00:46:21,480
Did they feel a feeling and that
scared them?
973
00:46:21,720 --> 00:46:23,760
Yes.
You and I talked about that.
974
00:46:23,840 --> 00:46:28,600
Yeah, a lot in our own, like
different situations, right?
975
00:46:28,600 --> 00:46:30,920
Yeah.
Or did I feel a feeling?
976
00:46:30,920 --> 00:46:34,680
And I expressed it and it wasn't
100% positive and adoring of
977
00:46:34,680 --> 00:46:38,000
you.
So then suddenly now I'm too
978
00:46:38,000 --> 00:46:39,920
sensitive, right?
I'm too dramatic.
979
00:46:39,920 --> 00:46:43,280
I'm too negative because I dared
to voice that I had this feeling
980
00:46:43,480 --> 00:46:44,280
right.
Yeah.
981
00:46:44,440 --> 00:46:47,720
And I know you and I would.
Imagine that it came across in
982
00:46:48,280 --> 00:46:54,760
an articulate calm, like non
accusatory, just this is how I'm
983
00:46:54,760 --> 00:46:56,560
feeling kind of way.
Yeah.
984
00:46:56,600 --> 00:46:58,160
I mean, OK, you know me pretty
well.
985
00:46:58,160 --> 00:47:00,560
I do.
Would you or do you think anyone
986
00:47:00,560 --> 00:47:04,000
in our circle would describe me
as too sensitive or too
987
00:47:04,000 --> 00:47:05,920
dramatic?
Not at all.
988
00:47:06,080 --> 00:47:10,000
Yeah, because you're.
Actually very like you're to the
989
00:47:10,000 --> 00:47:11,880
point.
Like one thing I have always
990
00:47:11,880 --> 00:47:16,520
loved to bite you is that even
this week I was like, damn,
991
00:47:16,680 --> 00:47:18,640
she's amazing.
Where?
992
00:47:18,680 --> 00:47:19,920
Yes.
What did I do this week?
993
00:47:21,160 --> 00:47:23,360
Well.
We were in a situation.
994
00:47:23,360 --> 00:47:27,320
Of eating and it was expressed
that you could crawl on the
995
00:47:27,320 --> 00:47:31,120
floor to get to your seat that's
right I remember and you just.
996
00:47:31,120 --> 00:47:32,800
Said I'm absolutely not crawling
on the.
997
00:47:32,800 --> 00:47:37,280
Floor and I was like, like, I
just I just love that about you
998
00:47:37,280 --> 00:47:41,600
because you know you are not
you're just like you will say
999
00:47:41,600 --> 00:47:45,240
it.
You're not dramatic or you know,
1000
00:47:45,280 --> 00:47:47,400
you don't look for drama.
You're not.
1001
00:47:47,880 --> 00:47:49,840
No, I don't know what the word
is, but.
1002
00:47:49,840 --> 00:47:52,880
No, that is.
Absolutely not how anybody would
1003
00:47:52,880 --> 00:47:54,240
describe you that knows you
well.
1004
00:47:54,240 --> 00:47:56,080
Thanks for noticing because
you're amazing.
1005
00:47:56,240 --> 00:47:57,240
Thank you.
You are.
1006
00:47:57,480 --> 00:47:58,520
Yeah.
So I think there's.
1007
00:47:58,520 --> 00:48:02,440
That there's the phenomenon of,
well, I mean, this is almost
1008
00:48:02,440 --> 00:48:04,520
like a meme.
I think it is a meme, actually,
1009
00:48:04,520 --> 00:48:06,360
right?
Where men are like, well, yeah,
1010
00:48:06,360 --> 00:48:09,800
I did something shitty, but you
called me out on it.
1011
00:48:09,800 --> 00:48:12,400
So I'm the real victim here,
right?
1012
00:48:13,280 --> 00:48:15,160
There's pattern.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
1013
00:48:15,840 --> 00:48:17,920
What was that news?
Story we saw this week where
1014
00:48:17,920 --> 00:48:20,400
they.
Blamed like some woman for like
1015
00:48:20,400 --> 00:48:23,840
hundreds of years on something
and then they look into it and
1016
00:48:23,840 --> 00:48:25,760
they were like, oh, actually
that wasn't her fault.
1017
00:48:26,040 --> 00:48:29,880
Oh, right, that was it's.
Like a Chinese dynasty year or
1018
00:48:29,880 --> 00:48:33,160
something.
Yeah, it's it's just like, yeah,
1019
00:48:33,160 --> 00:48:36,840
to look it up and get back to
you friends, but that just that
1020
00:48:36,840 --> 00:48:41,920
idea that that's like the go to
like where why let's scapegoat a
1021
00:48:41,920 --> 00:48:43,600
woman instead of like the
massive.
1022
00:48:43,600 --> 00:48:46,480
Environmental destruction that
like tanked our civilization.
1023
00:48:46,560 --> 00:48:48,680
Yes.
And you know, I did.
1024
00:48:48,680 --> 00:48:52,640
Have an experience like that
with Mr. Clydesdale this week
1025
00:48:52,640 --> 00:48:55,320
because we were coffee was going
to happen.
1026
00:48:55,560 --> 00:48:57,480
Oh my God, it was like going to
happen.
1027
00:48:57,480 --> 00:49:00,840
Finally going to perform.
Yes, I feel like, Oh my God, I
1028
00:49:00,840 --> 00:49:04,960
got I'm going to get 45 minutes
of your time and I received a
1029
00:49:04,960 --> 00:49:10,800
text that was like, hey, so on
day off, like we'd we'd a vague
1030
00:49:10,800 --> 00:49:15,200
time, like map tight.
And he said I'm just like so
1031
00:49:15,200 --> 00:49:19,240
busy, but I'm at this particular
coffee shop and like, if you
1032
00:49:19,240 --> 00:49:23,000
wanted, you could stop by or
maybe just next week instead.
1033
00:49:23,080 --> 00:49:25,360
Oh my God, that was not hot
that.
1034
00:49:25,800 --> 00:49:29,640
OK, so he's like, I'm so busy.
Yeah.
1035
00:49:29,640 --> 00:49:32,680
And first of all, he's saying
that to you, the busiest person
1036
00:49:32,680 --> 00:49:35,200
I know in my whole fucking life.
OK.
1037
00:49:35,240 --> 00:49:37,040
But you know, it shouldn't be a
badge of honor.
1038
00:49:37,320 --> 00:49:40,280
Well, you know, sure, sure, but
also like it's.
1039
00:49:40,960 --> 00:49:43,640
I don't know, kind of naive.
It sounds like he doesn't know
1040
00:49:43,640 --> 00:49:46,880
what's going on in your life,
which is what I actually pointed
1041
00:49:46,880 --> 00:49:49,320
out to.
Him in that moment so like I was
1042
00:49:49,320 --> 00:49:51,520
already I, I was at work and I
bought a little change of
1043
00:49:51,520 --> 00:49:55,200
clothes and like, I was so
excited and, and, you know, I
1044
00:49:55,200 --> 00:49:57,680
said to him, I just have a crush
on you and I wanted to get
1045
00:49:57,680 --> 00:50:02,600
coffee and that was surprising
to him what he was like, oh,
1046
00:50:02,600 --> 00:50:03,680
that's so.
Cute.
1047
00:50:03,720 --> 00:50:06,200
And I was like.
Well, what else did you think it
1048
00:50:06,200 --> 00:50:08,560
was?
Like I, I don't understand.
1049
00:50:08,960 --> 00:50:14,280
But I did bring up the point
that, you know, I you keep
1050
00:50:14,280 --> 00:50:17,800
telling me this, but like, you
don't ask when I'm free or where
1051
00:50:17,800 --> 00:50:21,600
I would like to go or, you know,
could it be a little bit more
1052
00:50:21,600 --> 00:50:24,080
elaborative?
Yeah, he's like, I'm super busy.
1053
00:50:24,080 --> 00:50:26,320
So I'm at this coffee shop.
I guess you could come by if you
1054
00:50:26,360 --> 00:50:28,960
want and watch, watch me work.
I mean, I don't really care if.
1055
00:50:28,960 --> 00:50:31,680
You do or not?
Whatever if you want to come by
1056
00:50:31,680 --> 00:50:33,840
then.
Like fine I feel so I guess.
1057
00:50:34,520 --> 00:50:37,520
You can sit there and watch me.
Work for a few minutes I might
1058
00:50:37,520 --> 00:50:40,720
take a call well what a what an
invitation, right.
1059
00:50:40,800 --> 00:50:46,520
I felt so wanted so cherished
that moment challenged desired
1060
00:50:46,600 --> 00:50:50,360
yeah all all of the things so I
I give him a quiz I was like
1061
00:50:50,360 --> 00:50:53,560
what what do you know about me
like what do you know about me
1062
00:50:53,880 --> 00:50:57,400
and again I.
He said that I was too intense.
1063
00:50:57,400 --> 00:50:59,760
It was the intensity that he
couldn't take.
1064
00:50:59,760 --> 00:51:03,720
Oh my God, you are not I'm.
A wee bit mental like, well,
1065
00:51:03,720 --> 00:51:05,920
give me.
That but like I'm well, you're
1066
00:51:05,920 --> 00:51:07,640
not mental like there's some
chaos from.
1067
00:51:07,640 --> 00:51:10,080
Time to time, but like, I
wouldn't.
1068
00:51:10,080 --> 00:51:12,920
Hopefully it's endearing.
Intense would never be a word I
1069
00:51:13,120 --> 00:51:15,600
would come.
Up with and I have certainly not
1070
00:51:15,600 --> 00:51:17,760
been intense.
With this man we're texting
1071
00:51:17,760 --> 00:51:19,640
friends so you.
Have it.
1072
00:51:19,640 --> 00:51:22,080
That's it.
It's like very superficial.
1073
00:51:22,360 --> 00:51:27,480
But yeah, he was, he was quite
irritated, shall we say, and I
1074
00:51:27,480 --> 00:51:30,760
had to point out that he he
could not help but talk over me.
1075
00:51:31,240 --> 00:51:34,560
Another thing that we have
experienced one too many times.
1076
00:51:34,600 --> 00:51:36,440
I really don't like that.
I don't either.
1077
00:51:36,640 --> 00:51:38,000
But I.
Will give him his his.
1078
00:51:38,080 --> 00:51:43,920
His his Jews, Druze something.
We'll give him some snaps.
1079
00:51:43,920 --> 00:51:46,640
I was going.
To say, but that's not the right
1080
00:51:46,640 --> 00:51:48,880
word.
And it came out like that, so
1081
00:51:48,880 --> 00:51:51,280
yes.
He he, he was responsive, he
1082
00:51:51,280 --> 00:51:54,960
listened and he really did try
like to not talk.
1083
00:51:55,640 --> 00:52:00,440
I could tell it took a long that
was a real big ask.
1084
00:52:00,480 --> 00:52:04,360
But he he really did try.
And and he called me back later
1085
00:52:04,360 --> 00:52:07,760
that day and asked me questions.
Oh, OK, yeah.
1086
00:52:08,000 --> 00:52:12,720
So he was somehow unaware that
he had asked no questions and
1087
00:52:12,720 --> 00:52:16,880
that this might be a thing that
humans do with one another in a
1088
00:52:16,880 --> 00:52:18,400
relationship, regardless of the
type.
1089
00:52:18,520 --> 00:52:20,600
Yeah, he realized that after
meeting me.
1090
00:52:20,600 --> 00:52:22,800
One year ago, he did not still
know my last name.
1091
00:52:26,280 --> 00:52:28,400
It's so it's amazing.
Yeah.
1092
00:52:28,480 --> 00:52:30,480
Bringing.
It back to why the men might be
1093
00:52:30,480 --> 00:52:33,560
lonely, I mean.
Oh yeah, I just.
1094
00:52:33,840 --> 00:52:37,200
Yeah.
It's it's just very interesting
1095
00:52:37,200 --> 00:52:39,960
because they sometimes feel like
even just with the interactions
1096
00:52:39,960 --> 00:52:43,880
and dating apps, you're like,
well, if you're feeling lonely,
1097
00:52:43,880 --> 00:52:49,880
this there may not be be
behaviours associated with, you
1098
00:52:49,880 --> 00:52:52,960
know, trying to fix that.
Yeah, maybe you don't write a
1099
00:52:52,960 --> 00:52:54,000
bio.
That's super.
1100
00:52:54,040 --> 00:52:56,560
Angry and it's like putting
women down.
1101
00:52:56,960 --> 00:53:01,320
Maybe step 11 O one, Yeah, I
would take that so.
1102
00:53:01,560 --> 00:53:03,800
How do we solve the male
loneliness epidemic?
1103
00:53:03,800 --> 00:53:06,520
Male.
I don't know, I think.
1104
00:53:06,520 --> 00:53:08,080
They have to solve it
themselves.
1105
00:53:08,640 --> 00:53:13,000
Yes, maybe some hobbies.
Yeah, some friends, right?
1106
00:53:13,000 --> 00:53:17,120
Like lean into your friends and
if you don't have any friends go
1107
00:53:17,120 --> 00:53:19,440
make some.
Yeah, like get a wee book group
1108
00:53:19,440 --> 00:53:22,800
or something.
Yeah, something I don't know,
1109
00:53:22,800 --> 00:53:26,120
Watch some sports together.
Yeah, like growl together.
1110
00:53:28,240 --> 00:53:31,160
Touchdown right like watch a
game and.
1111
00:53:31,160 --> 00:53:33,760
Then, like, ask one question
about your friend's life.
1112
00:53:33,760 --> 00:53:35,680
You could practice.
Practice, Yeah.
1113
00:53:35,680 --> 00:53:38,840
And you could say to your.
Friend, like do you have this
1114
00:53:38,840 --> 00:53:42,440
issue and not asking questions
like maybe we could practice
1115
00:53:42,440 --> 00:53:45,520
together?
Yeah, I can't envisage any man
1116
00:53:45,520 --> 00:53:48,000
ever having that conversation,
but did I send?
1117
00:53:48,000 --> 00:53:50,640
You this little thing I saw on
Instagram, I can't remember now
1118
00:53:50,640 --> 00:53:53,800
because we send each other so
many things, but it was like
1119
00:53:53,800 --> 00:53:56,600
some guy on Twitter or X
whatever.
1120
00:53:56,600 --> 00:53:59,240
I don't want to use X Twitter.
It's called Yeah, being like,
1121
00:53:59,240 --> 00:54:02,520
well, how come women have
Galentine's Day and men don't
1122
00:54:02,520 --> 00:54:05,120
have anything?
And like some woman responds,
1123
00:54:05,120 --> 00:54:07,600
she's like, oh, I'm sorry, did
you want us to organize a little
1124
00:54:07,600 --> 00:54:11,520
thing for you?
Oh my God.
1125
00:54:12,600 --> 00:54:14,640
Like, yeah, right.
Where is it?
1126
00:54:14,640 --> 00:54:18,440
It didn't magically appear.
Someone didn't plan it for me.
1127
00:54:18,760 --> 00:54:20,480
Oh.
My God.
1128
00:54:21,640 --> 00:54:25,920
Wow, if only there was a.
Way for them to plan that and do
1129
00:54:25,920 --> 00:54:28,520
it with their friends.
If only yes.
1130
00:54:28,920 --> 00:54:34,680
Oh yeah, and it it ties back to
our little dead fish episode 2.
1131
00:54:34,680 --> 00:54:37,920
Right?
Like, the reason why a lot of
1132
00:54:37,920 --> 00:54:41,280
men only have that picture is
it's because it's like, one of
1133
00:54:41,280 --> 00:54:43,280
the only things where another
person is present.
1134
00:54:43,480 --> 00:54:45,920
Yeah.
Which makes me, like, sad,
1135
00:54:46,240 --> 00:54:48,440
definitely.
Like I'm sad for them.
1136
00:54:48,840 --> 00:54:54,440
And.
Also like maybe do do.
1137
00:54:54,440 --> 00:54:57,760
Something in your power do.
Something, damn it.
1138
00:54:57,960 --> 00:55:01,080
Yeah.
I mean, you moved back to Utah
1139
00:55:01,400 --> 00:55:05,240
from California.
I moved here from another land.
1140
00:55:05,360 --> 00:55:07,120
We find each other.
We did.
1141
00:55:07,320 --> 00:55:09,440
We find friends and meaning.
Yeah.
1142
00:55:09,440 --> 00:55:11,240
And sometimes it takes a minute.
Yeah, it.
1143
00:55:11,240 --> 00:55:14,040
Can be hard.
It can be hard at our age, yes,
1144
00:55:14,040 --> 00:55:16,200
but it's not impossible.
It is.
1145
00:55:16,280 --> 00:55:18,560
There's even the option on the
apps for making.
1146
00:55:18,560 --> 00:55:19,840
Friends.
Sure, yeah.
1147
00:55:19,840 --> 00:55:21,800
Or there's like, meet up groups,
Yeah, you know.
1148
00:55:21,800 --> 00:55:25,160
There's bars and places in the
city that host events every
1149
00:55:25,160 --> 00:55:27,040
night of the week.
You don't even have to drink
1150
00:55:27,080 --> 00:55:28,640
right?
If you're sober that's fine.
1151
00:55:28,640 --> 00:55:32,880
Just go and like have a mocktail
or a non alcoholic beer and like
1152
00:55:33,080 --> 00:55:35,640
try to meet someone or hiking
groups.
1153
00:55:35,640 --> 00:55:38,480
My God, we're in Utah.
They're like 10 million hiking
1154
00:55:38,480 --> 00:55:39,720
groups.
Oh my God, there's so many.
1155
00:55:40,600 --> 00:55:43,080
So people are out there.
Yeah, you can find them.
1156
00:55:43,280 --> 00:55:45,000
I believe in you.
Have you?
1157
00:55:45,400 --> 00:55:49,520
Have you ever dated?
A person that didn't really have
1158
00:55:49,640 --> 00:55:51,480
like a lot of those connections.
Yes.
1159
00:55:51,920 --> 00:55:54,360
Yeah, that was very sweet
answer.
1160
00:55:55,800 --> 00:55:59,040
Yeah, I feel like a lot of.
Men don't some do have close
1161
00:55:59,040 --> 00:56:02,480
friends that they've held onto
for a long time and others don't
1162
00:56:02,480 --> 00:56:05,600
like they've had friends before.
But then situations change and
1163
00:56:05,600 --> 00:56:07,480
those friends go out of their
lives and they don't make new
1164
00:56:07,480 --> 00:56:10,360
ones.
And and it's a problem because
1165
00:56:10,360 --> 00:56:14,040
when the responsibility of being
the entire support network is on
1166
00:56:14,040 --> 00:56:18,240
you, then it's heavy.
It feels like a lot and it's
1167
00:56:18,320 --> 00:56:21,000
it's a lot on the.
Relationship and it's kind of
1168
00:56:21,400 --> 00:56:25,320
funny to me also because I think
a frequent thing you get from
1169
00:56:25,320 --> 00:56:27,240
men is like, I want to keep my
independence.
1170
00:56:27,240 --> 00:56:30,640
I want to, but like, they don't
do anything and you're like,
1171
00:56:30,840 --> 00:56:33,240
bro, I'm all about that.
Go out with your friends.
1172
00:56:33,240 --> 00:56:35,160
Absolutely.
I have my things to do.
1173
00:56:35,160 --> 00:56:39,360
But then a lot of times you also
carry the relationship socially.
1174
00:56:39,840 --> 00:56:41,600
That's right.
Because it's like, well, you
1175
00:56:41,600 --> 00:56:44,280
know my friends, but.
But where are your friends?
1176
00:56:44,520 --> 00:56:48,280
Yeah, yeah, that's fair.
Some pretty universal
1177
00:56:48,280 --> 00:56:50,760
experiences, I would say.
Yeah, I think so.
1178
00:56:53,080 --> 00:56:55,520
We're sorry that you're lonely.
If you are.
1179
00:56:55,520 --> 00:56:57,120
Some of you are not.
Yes, some of you have.
1180
00:56:57,400 --> 00:57:00,000
Wonderful partners and or social
networks.
1181
00:57:00,000 --> 00:57:02,800
So we wanna acknowledge that
once again, hashtag not all men.
1182
00:57:02,920 --> 00:57:05,080
Hashtag not all men, but enough
men.
1183
00:57:05,520 --> 00:57:07,280
That this.
Is in the news all the time.
1184
00:57:07,360 --> 00:57:08,760
Yeah.
I feel like every other day I
1185
00:57:08,760 --> 00:57:11,360
see another article about the
male loneliness epidemic.
1186
00:57:11,360 --> 00:57:16,800
Yeah, Which yeah, like.
I have never once heard a female
1187
00:57:16,800 --> 00:57:20,880
loneliness epidemic Yeah, and
yet never that study women are
1188
00:57:20,880 --> 00:57:23,240
lonely at the.
Same rates as men, yeah.
1189
00:57:23,680 --> 00:57:28,040
And I have to say like.
Again, generalizations, but in
1190
00:57:28,040 --> 00:57:31,880
the event of a divorce or you
know, where their share custody
1191
00:57:31,880 --> 00:57:36,480
of children, it has been my
experience that women are taking
1192
00:57:36,480 --> 00:57:39,480
on most of that sort of
day-to-day care, right.
1193
00:57:39,480 --> 00:57:43,520
And you know, again, hashtag not
all men, but like a a pretty
1194
00:57:43,520 --> 00:57:47,160
good a mind.
Just anecdotally from from
1195
00:57:47,160 --> 00:57:50,440
friends and people I know and
like, I know you feel this.
1196
00:57:50,440 --> 00:57:53,600
Our children are getting older,
but like some days require
1197
00:57:53,600 --> 00:57:59,400
Herculean efforts, like
Herculean efforts with work and
1198
00:57:59,400 --> 00:58:03,680
kids and stuff and
responsibilities and cleaning
1199
00:58:03,680 --> 00:58:06,560
and groceries that, you know,
it's like a lot.
1200
00:58:06,600 --> 00:58:10,680
It's a lot.
And yet we find time for
1201
00:58:10,880 --> 00:58:15,320
relationships or men, men in our
lives or, you know, whatever
1202
00:58:15,320 --> 00:58:17,640
that might look like.
And also that can be a really
1203
00:58:17,800 --> 00:58:20,720
lonely space.
It can be when you're carrying a
1204
00:58:20,720 --> 00:58:21,440
lot of that.
That.
1205
00:58:21,440 --> 00:58:24,800
Can be very lonely and it can be
lonely whether you're single or
1206
00:58:24,800 --> 00:58:26,880
whether you're.
Coupled actually you can be very
1207
00:58:26,880 --> 00:58:30,880
lonely in your marriage taking
all of these things on and and
1208
00:58:30,880 --> 00:58:34,760
it's often in many relationships
not acknowledged it's not
1209
00:58:34,760 --> 00:58:38,200
appreciated right yeah like you
know you're not doing the real
1210
00:58:38,200 --> 00:58:40,720
work quote UN quote yeah because
you're not doing the the
1211
00:58:40,720 --> 00:58:43,640
compensated work or you probably
are doing the compensated work
1212
00:58:43,640 --> 00:58:48,200
then you're also doing all this
other stuff which isn't really
1213
00:58:48,200 --> 00:58:50,880
appreciated for how much time it
takes and how much effort it
1214
00:58:50,880 --> 00:58:53,440
takes well and the mental load
right because it's.
1215
00:58:53,440 --> 00:58:57,080
That invisible work exactly
where you are always keeping.
1216
00:58:57,120 --> 00:58:59,640
A running.
Checklist of everything that
1217
00:58:59,640 --> 00:59:01,840
needs to be attention.
Attitude in your wee noggin.
1218
00:59:02,160 --> 00:59:05,320
And you know, sometimes the
men's will say, well, just tell
1219
00:59:05,320 --> 00:59:06,320
me.
And you're like, but that's
1220
00:59:06,320 --> 00:59:08,120
another step.
Just make me a list.
1221
00:59:08,120 --> 00:59:10,400
You're like, Oh my God, it's.
Faster to do it myself.
1222
00:59:10,400 --> 00:59:13,320
Yeah, you're like, but why can't
you use your eyes and your?
1223
00:59:13,320 --> 00:59:16,120
Brain.
And I know like.
1224
00:59:16,640 --> 00:59:18,760
I'm prone to tangents.
But I think all of these.
1225
00:59:18,760 --> 00:59:20,680
Things are related.
I think they are too.
1226
00:59:20,800 --> 00:59:22,720
You know, like whether.
Again, you're married.
1227
00:59:22,720 --> 00:59:26,880
Single in a relationship,
whatever that looks like.
1228
00:59:26,880 --> 00:59:29,200
I think they're all correlated
to this.
1229
00:59:29,200 --> 00:59:33,840
Then, you know, feeling of like
for a man, like I'm lonely and
1230
00:59:34,120 --> 00:59:36,080
it's a big problem and it's not
my fault.
1231
00:59:36,080 --> 00:59:38,720
Why is this happening?
Yeah, You know, Yeah, I think
1232
00:59:38,720 --> 00:59:40,120
that's right.
So to sum up.
1233
00:59:40,720 --> 00:59:44,240
Just this idea that men's
loneliness is a bigger problem
1234
00:59:44,280 --> 00:59:47,200
than women's loneliness, is it?
That's kind of rough.
1235
00:59:47,200 --> 00:59:49,480
I don't like it.
I it doesn't feel good, no.
1236
00:59:49,680 --> 00:59:52,440
Or that it's like so much
sadder.
1237
00:59:52,600 --> 00:59:54,160
Yeah, that's right.
It's so much more.
1238
00:59:54,160 --> 00:59:55,760
Tragic.
So tragic.
1239
00:59:56,360 --> 00:59:58,000
These women are terrible.
They don't.
1240
00:59:58,000 --> 01:00:00,640
Want me anymore?
Yeah yeah.
1241
01:00:01,360 --> 01:00:03,560
Well, we're running short of
time, so I feel like let's.
1242
01:00:03,560 --> 01:00:05,440
Wrap this up.
But I also feel like there's a
1243
01:00:05,440 --> 01:00:08,040
lot here and we should probably
address this in one or two
1244
01:00:08,040 --> 01:00:09,720
future episodes.
What do you think?
1245
01:00:09,840 --> 01:00:15,280
I think so because.
There's a like a lot of facets
1246
01:00:15,280 --> 01:00:19,440
to this right to like, why is
this loneliness happening?
1247
01:00:19,440 --> 01:00:24,680
You know, cuz women have changed
and evolved and you know, we
1248
01:00:24,680 --> 01:00:27,360
didn't have the best of
circumstances historically
1249
01:00:27,360 --> 01:00:29,440
speaking.
And you mean back when we were
1250
01:00:29,440 --> 01:00:32,320
property just?
Just, you know, a little bit
1251
01:00:32,320 --> 01:00:35,080
back then I.
Mean we can't forget that, you
1252
01:00:35,080 --> 01:00:37,560
know, and I'm a few years older
than you.
1253
01:00:37,560 --> 01:00:40,840
Like I couldn't own a home when
I was born, right?
1254
01:00:40,840 --> 01:00:43,600
You know, technically, yeah,
Probably have a credit card.
1255
01:00:43,600 --> 01:00:44,960
I don't.
Remember when that changed?
1256
01:00:44,960 --> 01:00:48,640
But I think it was the 70s.
It was I like I'm old, but not
1257
01:00:48,640 --> 01:00:51,400
that old, right?
So, so yeah, memory, I think a
1258
01:00:51,400 --> 01:00:53,200
few more episodes.
And let us know.
1259
01:00:53,200 --> 01:00:55,960
Let us know what part you would
like us to really dive into.
1260
01:00:56,000 --> 01:00:57,920
Yeah, friends.
So just to bring it full circle.
1261
01:00:57,920 --> 01:00:59,560
Please let us know in the
comments.
1262
01:00:59,560 --> 01:01:01,200
What do you think?
Do you want to hear more about
1263
01:01:01,200 --> 01:01:02,760
this?
Do you have any ideas?
1264
01:01:02,760 --> 01:01:04,720
Any comments on the male
loneliness epidemic?
1265
01:01:04,720 --> 01:01:07,600
We would love to hear them and
if we get those comments we will
1266
01:01:07,600 --> 01:01:09,120
address them in a future
episode.
1267
01:01:09,320 --> 01:01:11,360
And Salty Bros, tell us how
you're feeling.
1268
01:01:11,440 --> 01:01:15,360
Salty Bros, We want to hear from
everybody in yes, weigh in.
1269
01:01:15,360 --> 01:01:17,640
Tell us what it's really like.
I love that.
1270
01:01:18,120 --> 01:01:19,200
All right, Claire.
Well.
1271
01:01:19,560 --> 01:01:21,160
Should we sign off?
We will sign off.
1272
01:01:21,160 --> 01:01:22,640
My my.
Lovely friend.
1273
01:01:22,880 --> 01:01:25,240
Okay, salty bro, salty hoes
everywhere.
1274
01:01:25,640 --> 01:01:27,120
Keep it real.
Keep it real.
1275
01:01:27,120 --> 01:01:29,080
We'll be back at you next time.
Take care.
1276
01:01:29,240 --> 01:01:30,760
See you soon.
Bye.
00:00:21,560 --> 00:00:26,120
Hello and welcome back to our WE
podcast.
2
00:00:26,440 --> 00:00:28,400
My name is Claire.
And I'm Mel.
3
00:00:28,520 --> 00:00:32,080
And together we are the salty
hoes.
4
00:00:32,320 --> 00:00:34,840
And today, as always, we have a
great show for you.
5
00:00:35,200 --> 00:00:39,280
We're going to catch you up in a
few things in our lives and vis
6
00:00:39,280 --> 00:00:42,280
A vis the podcast.
And we're going to discuss the
7
00:00:42,280 --> 00:00:46,720
male loneliness epidemic, which
is a topic I'm sure you're all
8
00:00:46,720 --> 00:00:50,200
familiar with.
So Mel, tell me about your week.
9
00:00:50,200 --> 00:00:52,360
How is it and what is going on
with you?
10
00:00:52,600 --> 00:00:53,880
OK.
Yeah, the week.
11
00:00:53,880 --> 00:00:57,000
So first of all, we are having a
big snow right now.
12
00:00:57,000 --> 00:00:59,360
We are finally.
Winter has come to Utah in
13
00:00:59,360 --> 00:01:01,120
almost March.
Oh, I'm so excited.
14
00:01:01,120 --> 00:01:01,920
Yay.
Yeah.
15
00:01:01,920 --> 00:01:04,040
Except for driving today has
been terrible.
16
00:01:04,160 --> 00:01:05,560
Pretty bad.
Pretty bad.
17
00:01:05,560 --> 00:01:08,880
Driving down my hill has been
just a white knuckle horrid
18
00:01:08,880 --> 00:01:11,160
experience.
I would imagine that's a pretty
19
00:01:11,160 --> 00:01:12,920
steep hill.
It's a pretty steep hill.
20
00:01:12,920 --> 00:01:13,600
Ohio.
My goodness.
21
00:01:13,640 --> 00:01:16,880
We have probably 6 to 8 inches
of snow at my house right now.
22
00:01:16,920 --> 00:01:20,400
Yeah, I would love a good 6 to 8
inches girl.
23
00:01:22,000 --> 00:01:24,600
You and me both.
Yes, where is it?
24
00:01:24,680 --> 00:01:26,960
The snow is here.
Maybe it's a sign.
25
00:01:26,960 --> 00:01:31,400
Maybe the the other 68 inches
will manifest manifest.
26
00:01:31,400 --> 00:01:34,560
Afterwards, OK, I like it.
Let's let's, you know, send our
27
00:01:34,560 --> 00:01:37,480
energy out to the universe, Yes?
For 6 to 8 inches, send it.
28
00:01:37,600 --> 00:01:41,400
Send it, please.
Yes, we are in a we are in dire
29
00:01:41,400 --> 00:01:43,560
straits here.
Much like the state, we are in a
30
00:01:43,560 --> 00:01:47,760
drought.
Good thing we live in Utah.
31
00:01:48,440 --> 00:01:51,240
Good thing we live in Utah.
Good thing we live in Utah, so
32
00:01:51,240 --> 00:01:53,200
let's see what else happened
this week.
33
00:01:53,200 --> 00:01:57,120
I did have a date last night, so
that was the second date with
34
00:01:57,120 --> 00:01:59,560
Tennis Guy.
Oh tennis guy with the nice
35
00:01:59,560 --> 00:02:02,360
follow up message.
Yeah, no, he's quite nice.
36
00:02:02,520 --> 00:02:04,360
Uh huh.
The date was good.
37
00:02:04,360 --> 00:02:08,479
We had dinner.
He was very nice, very sweet.
38
00:02:08,520 --> 00:02:09,520
I.
Don't like nice?
39
00:02:09,560 --> 00:02:11,400
Yeah, I'm not feeling Sparks
here.
40
00:02:11,400 --> 00:02:12,920
I'm not feeling.
I don't know if I'm feeling
41
00:02:12,920 --> 00:02:15,880
Sparks like the conversation was
good.
42
00:02:15,880 --> 00:02:18,680
He did ask questions.
Oh, I know right.
43
00:02:18,680 --> 00:02:22,680
Bonus points, but I felt like I.
Carried the conversation.
44
00:02:22,760 --> 00:02:25,000
Yeah, mostly.
That's not fun, right?
45
00:02:25,000 --> 00:02:27,640
It's kind of exhaustive.
It right, It kind of is.
46
00:02:27,640 --> 00:02:29,440
It's like I need you to share
the load a little bit.
47
00:02:29,440 --> 00:02:33,120
He did try like, yeah, I'm not,
you know, nothing is wrong here.
48
00:02:33,120 --> 00:02:36,040
There's no red flags.
Right, he seems like a lovely a
49
00:02:36,040 --> 00:02:37,360
lovely.
Pleasant man.
50
00:02:37,440 --> 00:02:39,720
He seems like a lovely human.
I'm just not sure I'm feeling
51
00:02:39,720 --> 00:02:41,080
it.
Which is fair, right?
52
00:02:41,080 --> 00:02:43,280
Sometimes totally fair.
You know, things with two people
53
00:02:43,280 --> 00:02:46,160
just don't workout, don't match.
Yeah, sadly.
54
00:02:46,200 --> 00:02:48,920
Very sadly, actually.
I know I'm not sad about this
55
00:02:48,920 --> 00:02:52,160
guy, but I'm just thinking about
other situations that I would
56
00:02:52,160 --> 00:02:53,640
have preferred to work out
better.
57
00:02:54,320 --> 00:02:56,400
But let's see, what else was I
gonna say?
58
00:02:56,560 --> 00:03:01,840
Yes, the most chemistry I felt
last night on our date was when
59
00:03:01,840 --> 00:03:04,680
he kind of went up to go to the
bathroom and I started talking
60
00:03:04,680 --> 00:03:07,400
to the 2 girls that were sitting
at the table next to us.
61
00:03:07,400 --> 00:03:09,480
Just two girlfriends having a
wee catch up.
62
00:03:09,560 --> 00:03:11,360
Yeah Oh my God, look at me.
I'm saying we now.
63
00:03:11,360 --> 00:03:13,200
I'm rubbing off on you.
You are.
64
00:03:13,440 --> 00:03:17,080
I love it.
And they said something to me.
65
00:03:17,080 --> 00:03:19,840
I started talking to them and we
were like totally hitting it
66
00:03:19,840 --> 00:03:21,520
off.
We're like me, you see, friends.
67
00:03:22,480 --> 00:03:24,720
At least you made two new
friends from the evening.
68
00:03:24,760 --> 00:03:27,120
I did.
They were love interest. 02 new
69
00:03:27,120 --> 00:03:28,760
besties.
Yay yay.
70
00:03:29,160 --> 00:03:32,040
Oh my goodness.
Anyway, so that was fun.
71
00:03:32,400 --> 00:03:34,760
Well, a good night.
How was your week?
72
00:03:35,640 --> 00:03:38,280
My week?
Well, actually the weather is
73
00:03:38,280 --> 00:03:41,800
impeding my dating because I had
a date tonight.
74
00:03:41,840 --> 00:03:43,680
Oh, that's right, you did.
I did.
75
00:03:44,000 --> 00:03:46,160
It's cancelled.
Well, this one is interesting
76
00:03:46,160 --> 00:03:49,320
because as you know, I've
already shared.
77
00:03:49,400 --> 00:03:53,880
I we have probably matched.
I I've lost kind like many
78
00:03:53,880 --> 00:03:57,640
times, 7 or 8 like a lot of
times.
79
00:03:57,920 --> 00:04:00,600
Wow, so how does it usually go
when you match with this man?
80
00:04:00,600 --> 00:04:04,520
So like, is there any
conversation or is there just no
81
00:04:04,520 --> 00:04:07,560
messages exchanged at all?
So that is a good question
82
00:04:07,560 --> 00:04:11,720
because about the, I would say
about the first have to put
83
00:04:11,760 --> 00:04:15,920
percentages on it, like 40%.
There was just nothing.
84
00:04:16,160 --> 00:04:18,800
Oh, wow.
And also I have a really in his
85
00:04:18,800 --> 00:04:21,480
defense, I have a very low
threshold for dating sites.
86
00:04:21,480 --> 00:04:24,200
And so sometimes I'm like, I'm
going to go on and I'm going to
87
00:04:24,200 --> 00:04:29,360
be less weird and more open and
I'm going to swipe right because
88
00:04:29,360 --> 00:04:32,200
my problem is I will go through
about 700 profiles and swipe
89
00:04:32,360 --> 00:04:33,840
right like once.
Yeah.
90
00:04:33,840 --> 00:04:37,040
Because I'm just like, oh, oh, I
feel that you're even pickier
91
00:04:37,040 --> 00:04:38,400
than I am.
And I'm pretty picky.
92
00:04:38,400 --> 00:04:41,920
Yes, I, I have a ridiculous set
of criteria.
93
00:04:41,920 --> 00:04:45,080
Sometimes I will openly admit
that maybe it's self sabotage.
94
00:04:45,080 --> 00:04:46,760
I don't know.
We need to get a therapist on
95
00:04:46,760 --> 00:04:49,760
the show, but we should get a.
Therapist on the show sometime.
96
00:04:49,760 --> 00:04:53,760
To analyze our our blockages, a
little guest appearance
97
00:04:53,760 --> 00:04:56,400
blockage.
I should see if my therapist
98
00:04:56,400 --> 00:04:57,240
would do it.
She's right.
99
00:04:57,720 --> 00:04:59,240
She is amazing.
Yeah.
100
00:04:59,480 --> 00:05:01,120
OK.
All right, we will do that.
101
00:05:01,120 --> 00:05:02,920
Put a pin in that, yes, keep
telling me.
102
00:05:02,920 --> 00:05:04,600
OK.
So no conversation.
103
00:05:04,600 --> 00:05:08,080
And then one time I was just
like, this is ridiculous.
104
00:05:08,080 --> 00:05:09,800
Why does this man keep liking
me?
105
00:05:10,040 --> 00:05:14,920
And so I was like, you know, so
hi again, you know.
106
00:05:15,800 --> 00:05:18,240
The 5th time.
Like I need some conversation.
107
00:05:18,240 --> 00:05:21,400
I need more than like 3 words
every two days.
108
00:05:21,600 --> 00:05:25,800
Yeah, it's just like, and no
question, just like I'll ask a
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00:05:25,800 --> 00:05:29,880
question and they answer it and
it's like, my dudes, all you
110
00:05:29,880 --> 00:05:32,680
have to say is you question.
Mark, how about you?
111
00:05:32,880 --> 00:05:36,640
How about you HBU question mark?
Like that's it.
112
00:05:36,640 --> 00:05:40,520
It's so simple, but it would
just be like, you know, 3 words
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00:05:40,520 --> 00:05:43,640
and I'd be like oh wow, OK, well
you know, similar to your
114
00:05:43,640 --> 00:05:45,680
situation last night.
What do I do with this?
115
00:05:45,920 --> 00:05:47,480
Like, do I have to carry the
whole thing?
116
00:05:47,480 --> 00:05:49,360
Yeah, Well, he.
Wasn't that bad, it was just
117
00:05:49,600 --> 00:05:51,360
maybe I'm more naturally
talkative.
118
00:05:51,360 --> 00:05:54,560
Yeah, but but also they need to
ask more questions like what is
119
00:05:54,560 --> 00:05:58,240
this phenomena, right.
So this time I saw I was on
120
00:05:58,240 --> 00:06:00,480
Tinder, I saw him on there and I
saw he had liked me.
121
00:06:00,760 --> 00:06:04,560
And so I liked him back.
And I just said, what is
122
00:06:04,560 --> 00:06:08,520
different this time?
I was not beaten around the
123
00:06:08,520 --> 00:06:11,280
Bush.
I was just like, I am not this
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00:06:11,280 --> 00:06:13,520
the last time is like watching
paint dry.
125
00:06:13,520 --> 00:06:15,760
So I just I'm not doing that
anymore.
126
00:06:16,160 --> 00:06:18,680
So wow.
He actually responded and he was
127
00:06:18,680 --> 00:06:21,280
like, let's plan A.
Diet, Oh my God, look at that
128
00:06:21,280 --> 00:06:22,680
because.
You know, we feel like we've
129
00:06:22,680 --> 00:06:24,320
known each other for years at
this point.
130
00:06:24,320 --> 00:06:25,760
I.
Mean you almost almost have
131
00:06:25,760 --> 00:06:27,560
known each other, not quite
known each other.
132
00:06:27,560 --> 00:06:31,800
This sounds like a student.
I once had my class 4 times.
133
00:06:31,960 --> 00:06:32,960
Oh wow.
Or.
134
00:06:32,960 --> 00:06:35,080
Consecutive times they must have
loved you.
135
00:06:36,040 --> 00:06:39,520
Well, I don't think he disliked
me.
136
00:06:39,680 --> 00:06:42,360
Yeah, but he just couldn't seal
the deal.
137
00:06:42,360 --> 00:06:44,160
Just couldn't seal.
And I asked him the same
138
00:06:44,160 --> 00:06:47,360
question on the fourth attempt.
I was like, hey, buddy, what's
139
00:06:47,360 --> 00:06:48,800
gonna be different this
semester?
140
00:06:48,800 --> 00:06:51,440
It's gonna be different.
It's been the same pattern 3
141
00:06:51,440 --> 00:06:54,200
semesters in a row.
And much like your guy, he would
142
00:06:54,200 --> 00:06:56,320
get to exam one.
He would do OK.
143
00:06:56,320 --> 00:06:58,480
Yeah, Maybe pull out ABB minus.
Uh huh.
144
00:06:58,840 --> 00:07:01,560
And then sort of taper off.
You're just like.
145
00:07:01,760 --> 00:07:05,480
I guess question mark you're
like, I know you're capable of
146
00:07:05,480 --> 00:07:08,120
succeeding.
Yes, if you can get AB on test 1
147
00:07:08,120 --> 00:07:10,680
and then gone.
You're like, just stay with me,
148
00:07:10,800 --> 00:07:12,040
right?
Stay with me, brother.
149
00:07:12,480 --> 00:07:13,880
Stay with.
Me in early.
150
00:07:13,880 --> 00:07:14,760
Trial.
Oh my God.
151
00:07:14,760 --> 00:07:17,400
Sounds very similar to your your
date your cancelled.
152
00:07:17,560 --> 00:07:21,120
Date my cancelled date.
So he we arranged something.
153
00:07:21,760 --> 00:07:23,720
It's it's been actually a couple
of weeks.
154
00:07:23,720 --> 00:07:25,680
So we were gonna finally do it
tonight.
155
00:07:25,920 --> 00:07:29,920
It was all in in place.
And this morning he was like,
156
00:07:30,320 --> 00:07:32,480
can we play it by ear?
Because like, it's really,
157
00:07:32,480 --> 00:07:35,880
really snowy.
And to give him his dues, he
158
00:07:35,880 --> 00:07:38,600
lives in the mountains, so.
Well, that is.
159
00:07:38,720 --> 00:07:39,640
Fair.
They're getting a couple of
160
00:07:39,640 --> 00:07:42,360
feet.
Yeah, like for all our we Irish
161
00:07:42,360 --> 00:07:46,720
listeners out there who will,
you know, understand when like 2
162
00:07:46,720 --> 00:07:49,160
inches fall in Ireland, the
whole country is at a stand.
163
00:07:49,160 --> 00:07:51,280
So like, they are getting feet.
Yeah.
164
00:07:51,720 --> 00:07:54,520
Feet, yes, maybe 2-3 feet in the
mountains.
165
00:07:54,520 --> 00:07:57,800
So I will forgive him.
And here's you and I have had
166
00:07:57,800 --> 00:07:59,760
this conversation many times.
Right away.
167
00:07:59,760 --> 00:08:01,200
He made other plants.
Oh.
168
00:08:01,640 --> 00:08:02,720
Good.
We like this.
169
00:08:02,800 --> 00:08:05,080
We do like this.
We like this, so we're gonna
170
00:08:05,080 --> 00:08:07,120
have a wee Saturday afternoon
beverage.
171
00:08:07,120 --> 00:08:08,360
Oh, I like it.
Yeah.
172
00:08:08,520 --> 00:08:09,520
Good.
OK.
173
00:08:09,520 --> 00:08:11,800
Place TBD, but we're on the
right track.
174
00:08:11,800 --> 00:08:13,080
That's OK.
You have a time.
175
00:08:13,200 --> 00:08:15,200
You have a plan.
Yeah, at least you have the
176
00:08:15,200 --> 00:08:19,080
concept of a plan.
Wow, here we go.
177
00:08:19,080 --> 00:08:22,440
I feel good about this.
OK, not necessarily about, you
178
00:08:22,440 --> 00:08:24,920
know, this is a relationship,
but I feel good about the fact
179
00:08:24,920 --> 00:08:26,640
you're finally gonna go on a
date with this man.
180
00:08:26,680 --> 00:08:30,640
No, it feels just a date period.
A date period Claire is
181
00:08:30,640 --> 00:08:32,400
practicing.
Yay.
182
00:08:32,559 --> 00:08:35,360
Good job, Claire.
So yeah, hey, progress is
183
00:08:35,360 --> 00:08:37,120
progress.
Progress is progress.
184
00:08:37,159 --> 00:08:39,840
I'm gonna have a date and I will
return and report.
185
00:08:40,440 --> 00:08:41,600
OK?
I love that.
186
00:08:42,000 --> 00:08:43,880
We will definitely do that.
All right.
187
00:08:43,880 --> 00:08:48,320
Well, Speaking of updates, we
also wanted to give all y'all a
188
00:08:48,480 --> 00:08:50,760
little update on how the podcast
is going.
189
00:08:51,240 --> 00:08:56,000
So yes, yeah, Claire, I know you
are more tuned into the numbers.
190
00:08:56,400 --> 00:08:59,240
Maybe just give us a ballpark
like how many people have or how
191
00:08:59,240 --> 00:09:00,680
many listens have.
We had so far.
192
00:09:00,800 --> 00:09:02,880
I love the metrics.
Right, they're so.
193
00:09:02,920 --> 00:09:05,520
Too, I love the metrics.
I'm a little ashamed to say
194
00:09:05,520 --> 00:09:09,480
that, but I do love the metrics.
Not that I'm fixated on them,
195
00:09:09,480 --> 00:09:12,400
but they're just interesting.
But we should start with a thank
196
00:09:12,400 --> 00:09:17,120
you because we have had, we're
coming up on 1500 listens that's
197
00:09:17,200 --> 00:09:19,720
amazing across Apple and
Spotify.
198
00:09:19,720 --> 00:09:21,760
Wow.
So thank you for listening.
199
00:09:21,920 --> 00:09:24,800
Yeah, all you salty hoes and
salty pros out there.
200
00:09:24,800 --> 00:09:28,120
Thank you from the bottom of our
heart for coming along with us
201
00:09:28,120 --> 00:09:30,440
on this journey.
We're having a ton of fun.
202
00:09:30,440 --> 00:09:31,760
I hope that you.
Are much fun.
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00:09:32,200 --> 00:09:36,000
Like we are genuinely so just
delighted that anyone is
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listening because we were like,
you know, we just want to do
205
00:09:39,440 --> 00:09:41,520
this thing.
It's kind of cathartic for us
206
00:09:41,520 --> 00:09:44,920
both.
It's really fun as, as a lot of
207
00:09:44,920 --> 00:09:47,760
you have commented, me and Mel
have great chemistry.
208
00:09:47,840 --> 00:09:50,200
Yes, we love it.
It's so fun.
209
00:09:50,640 --> 00:09:53,120
And yeah, we we've had these
listens.
210
00:09:53,120 --> 00:09:56,160
And as you point out, we know
from your brother, my
211
00:09:56,160 --> 00:10:00,160
brother-in-law, that we do have
some bona fide salty Bros out
212
00:10:00,160 --> 00:10:02,880
there.
But also our little data points
213
00:10:02,880 --> 00:10:05,440
show that we have about 15% male
listeners.
214
00:10:05,520 --> 00:10:07,760
Oh, that's great.
Yes, I love that.
215
00:10:07,760 --> 00:10:11,360
And I have another dear friend
whose husband is also you're a
216
00:10:11,360 --> 00:10:12,960
frequent listener.
Wow.
217
00:10:12,960 --> 00:10:15,440
And when I bump into him, he'll
be like, Oh my goodness.
218
00:10:15,440 --> 00:10:19,040
And you know, give a give a
little tidbit from from the pod.
219
00:10:19,040 --> 00:10:21,600
So wow.
Wow, extra shout out to our
220
00:10:21,640 --> 00:10:24,440
salty Bros out there.
Thank you, salty Bros.
221
00:10:24,760 --> 00:10:28,040
Also, we're global.
We're global.
222
00:10:28,200 --> 00:10:31,000
I mean, we kind of knew that
because it's actually been a
223
00:10:31,000 --> 00:10:35,320
really lovely byproduct of all
of this because I feel like I am
224
00:10:35,320 --> 00:10:39,000
back in touch with like so many
friends from Ireland that are
225
00:10:39,000 --> 00:10:40,800
like, oh, it's so nice to hear
your voice.
226
00:10:40,800 --> 00:10:43,640
And like, you know, we're like,
when I come back on a wee trip,
227
00:10:43,640 --> 00:10:45,840
like, let's get a drink.
I love that.
228
00:10:45,840 --> 00:10:47,480
So that's been a really lovely
thing.
229
00:10:47,480 --> 00:10:51,800
So we obviously have Irish
visitors, visitors, visitors to
230
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the pod, our visitors.
We also have some English ones
231
00:10:56,320 --> 00:10:56,960
too.
Oh.
232
00:10:57,040 --> 00:11:00,080
OK, so they.
Are listening in the UK to take
233
00:11:00,080 --> 00:11:01,640
back.
Everything I said about the UK,
234
00:11:01,640 --> 00:11:03,800
sorry friends.
Yeah, we appreciate you
235
00:11:03,800 --> 00:11:05,280
listening.
Just don't be in the street.
236
00:11:05,760 --> 00:11:09,120
But yeah, we might sit on the
British Museum a little bit,
237
00:11:09,120 --> 00:11:12,160
especially this week, but yes,
yes, yes.
238
00:11:12,240 --> 00:11:14,080
And I.
Mean for other things too.
239
00:11:14,080 --> 00:11:15,840
Yeah, I mean, really.
For all the things, yes, for all
240
00:11:15,840 --> 00:11:18,000
the colonies, it's great.
We have some UK listeners.
241
00:11:18,200 --> 00:11:19,720
Thank you.
Thank you Brits.
242
00:11:19,960 --> 00:11:21,040
Thank you, Brits.
We love you.
243
00:11:21,280 --> 00:11:23,000
You did one thing right.
Just kidding.
244
00:11:24,160 --> 00:11:26,840
Australia.
I think that's my Auntie Lynn.
245
00:11:26,840 --> 00:11:28,440
So shout out, Auntie Lynn.
Thank you.
246
00:11:29,000 --> 00:11:33,920
Yes, yes, I have some rallies,
as they'd say in Australia, in.
247
00:11:34,320 --> 00:11:38,840
Sydney so my God, I love how
Australians turn every word into
248
00:11:38,840 --> 00:11:40,760
happy fun time.
It's amazing.
249
00:11:40,880 --> 00:11:42,680
It just feels.
Like such a happy fun time
250
00:11:42,680 --> 00:11:44,040
place.
It's joyful.
251
00:11:44,040 --> 00:11:48,240
Yeah, I need to.
Go Mirka, Mirka all across
252
00:11:48,240 --> 00:11:52,000
Mirka, we've got all this.
Well, not all the states
253
00:11:52,000 --> 00:11:54,720
represented actually about 8:00
but but that's.
254
00:11:54,760 --> 00:11:57,200
All right, we're getting there.
But we're just so grateful.
255
00:11:57,800 --> 00:12:00,960
It's like, this isn't like a a
Bragg metric.
256
00:12:00,960 --> 00:12:06,120
It's like a gleeful surprise.
We're so grateful to everybody
257
00:12:06,640 --> 00:12:08,200
for listening.
Yeah, we really.
258
00:12:08,200 --> 00:12:11,760
Really are and I feel like this
is doing pretty well.
259
00:12:11,760 --> 00:12:17,400
So we're recording this on
February 18th and I feel like
260
00:12:17,400 --> 00:12:20,840
for being in this game, what a
whole six or seven weeks, we're
261
00:12:20,840 --> 00:12:22,960
actually doing quite well.
So we're so.
262
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Excited I'm.
Proud of us.
263
00:12:24,520 --> 00:12:26,840
I, I am too.
I, you know, the thing that I'm
264
00:12:26,840 --> 00:12:30,080
proud of us for and it's, it's
not our we data set.
265
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It's we decided to do a thing
and we're doing a thing that's
266
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right.
So we just wanted.
267
00:12:35,040 --> 00:12:36,360
To do a thing, we wanted to do
a.
268
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Thing And I think the thing has
been spectacular the.
269
00:12:38,720 --> 00:12:41,280
Thing has been so much fun.
So much fun.
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So do.
Your thing, peoples, if you're
271
00:12:43,040 --> 00:12:45,840
like, I have always wanted to do
a thing, just do a thing.
272
00:12:45,840 --> 00:12:46,400
You know what?
Give.
273
00:12:46,400 --> 00:12:49,800
It a try and like maybe it won't
succeed and like maybe this
274
00:12:49,800 --> 00:12:52,520
podcast will be done after a
while, who knows?
275
00:12:52,520 --> 00:12:54,720
But you know what?
At least we tried.
276
00:12:54,840 --> 00:12:57,000
And we're.
Just enjoying it so much.
277
00:12:57,000 --> 00:12:58,720
So, so much.
This is the highlight of my
278
00:12:58,760 --> 00:13:00,720
week.
Me too, like I.
279
00:13:01,080 --> 00:13:03,720
I came in here today.
I was like, I'm so excited.
280
00:13:03,720 --> 00:13:04,840
I know.
Yeah.
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00:13:04,920 --> 00:13:08,000
So we're so grateful.
So thank you for listening.
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Thank you.
We will also say that if you are
283
00:13:10,800 --> 00:13:13,800
listening, what can people do
for us, Mel?
284
00:13:13,800 --> 00:13:14,800
Yeah.
Absolutely.
285
00:13:14,800 --> 00:13:18,840
So if you would like to see this
podcast succeed, if you would
286
00:13:18,840 --> 00:13:21,760
like it to continue, there are a
few things you could do to help
287
00:13:21,760 --> 00:13:24,280
us out if you have the time and
bandwidth.
288
00:13:24,320 --> 00:13:27,160
Now, we're not trying to like,
you know, make this a
289
00:13:27,160 --> 00:13:31,680
requirement, but #1 would be to
give us a five star rating on
290
00:13:31,720 --> 00:13:35,080
either Spotify or Apple Podcasts
or if you think we.
291
00:13:35,080 --> 00:13:37,640
Deserve it, of course of.
Course, we hope we do once
292
00:13:37,680 --> 00:13:38,680
again.
Yeah, we hope we do.
293
00:13:38,680 --> 00:13:41,160
If you're still listening, I
feel like you are probably
294
00:13:41,160 --> 00:13:42,400
enjoying it.
Yeah, we.
295
00:13:42,400 --> 00:13:43,640
Hope so, yeah.
So.
296
00:13:43,640 --> 00:13:47,760
If you could give us a five star
rating and bonus points, if you
297
00:13:47,760 --> 00:13:50,720
could write us a little review,
that would actually be huge for
298
00:13:50,720 --> 00:13:51,640
us.
It's so.
299
00:13:51,640 --> 00:13:52,640
Good.
Yeah, those.
300
00:13:52,800 --> 00:13:56,760
As things help the podcast be
discovered by new people, it
301
00:13:56,760 --> 00:13:58,440
kind of moves it up in the
rankings.
302
00:13:58,440 --> 00:14:00,440
So if people are searching then
that helps.
303
00:14:00,920 --> 00:14:04,000
We do have some salty hoes and
salty Bros that have already
304
00:14:04,000 --> 00:14:06,000
done that.
And for those of you that have,
305
00:14:06,000 --> 00:14:07,800
thank you, thank you, thank you,
thank you, thank you.
306
00:14:07,800 --> 00:14:10,920
Bottom of our hearts.
It is so appreciated so much.
307
00:14:11,280 --> 00:14:14,040
And something else that you
could do would just be to leave
308
00:14:14,040 --> 00:14:17,240
a we comment on our episodes.
So if there's something you
309
00:14:17,240 --> 00:14:20,800
liked or didn't like, we're open
to all feedback, but just leave
310
00:14:20,800 --> 00:14:23,240
us a we comment.
What did do you think?
311
00:14:23,240 --> 00:14:26,720
What did you enjoy hearing?
What should be our next Smash or
312
00:14:26,720 --> 00:14:28,640
Pass category?
Yeah, did.
313
00:14:28,640 --> 00:14:29,720
You enjoy that?
Yeah.
314
00:14:30,280 --> 00:14:32,840
Do you want us to do that again?
Like we're happy to?
315
00:14:32,840 --> 00:14:34,280
Yep.
Feedback really helps.
316
00:14:34,280 --> 00:14:36,600
Us out, you know I did.
Have one suggestion for that.
317
00:14:36,600 --> 00:14:40,560
Someone's like, well, you should
do smash or pass for the leaders
318
00:14:40,600 --> 00:14:42,440
of the LDS Church.
And I was like, well, that is
319
00:14:42,440 --> 00:14:43,800
really easy.
That's just a hard pass.
320
00:14:43,800 --> 00:14:45,360
It's just a.
Hard pass the board.
321
00:14:45,360 --> 00:14:48,160
All of them done, all of them
easy like.
322
00:14:48,200 --> 00:14:51,600
That is, yeah, we can.
I just wow.
323
00:14:51,640 --> 00:14:52,600
Yes.
No.
324
00:14:52,920 --> 00:14:54,760
I know.
So if you have another great
325
00:14:54,760 --> 00:14:57,280
idea, something you wanna hear,
please just leave us a comment.
326
00:14:57,280 --> 00:15:00,200
We would love to hear it.
We'd love to kinda hear how
327
00:15:00,200 --> 00:15:03,800
these things are landing.
We are getting texts from
328
00:15:03,800 --> 00:15:06,560
friends and stuff like that, but
it would be really great to get
329
00:15:06,560 --> 00:15:09,080
a comment on Spotify or Apple
Podcasts.
330
00:15:09,760 --> 00:15:13,480
Another exciting update to kind
of loop you in on is that we now
331
00:15:13,480 --> 00:15:16,200
have a website and a YouTube
channel.
332
00:15:16,400 --> 00:15:18,760
I love this.
I know so so far y'all they're a
333
00:15:18,760 --> 00:15:21,000
little bit basic yeah, but we do
bear with us yeah.
334
00:15:21,000 --> 00:15:23,840
We do plan on fancying we have
full time jobs we're.
335
00:15:23,880 --> 00:15:26,240
Trying.
I know, I mean I feel.
336
00:15:26,240 --> 00:15:30,080
Like you have several full time
jobs there, it's fine.
337
00:15:30,280 --> 00:15:32,240
Yeah.
So if you want to visit our
338
00:15:32,240 --> 00:15:36,840
website, www.saltyhose.com and
our YouTube channel is
339
00:15:36,840 --> 00:15:39,320
Saltyhose, so you can find us
there as well.
340
00:15:39,640 --> 00:15:42,920
Eventually we plan to do video
podcasts, but we're not quite
341
00:15:42,920 --> 00:15:44,320
there yet.
We're not quite there.
342
00:15:44,320 --> 00:15:46,400
But we're learning.
The kids is learning.
343
00:15:46,960 --> 00:15:49,720
Yeah, sweetheart is learning.
That's actually a presidential
344
00:15:49,720 --> 00:15:50,880
quote.
Oh.
345
00:15:50,920 --> 00:15:52,520
Yeah.
Is our children learning?
346
00:15:52,560 --> 00:15:53,560
Yes.
GW.
347
00:15:53,560 --> 00:15:56,280
Yeah, my.
My daughter had it as her senior
348
00:15:56,280 --> 00:15:57,760
quote in the yearbook.
I love that.
349
00:15:57,800 --> 00:16:01,680
Yeah, it's amazing.
We also need to mention Speaking
350
00:16:01,680 --> 00:16:02,800
of accounts.
And then we're done.
351
00:16:02,800 --> 00:16:05,720
I promise.
We have an Instagram account.
352
00:16:05,920 --> 00:16:09,840
We have a a dormant TikTok, but
it it will be thriving shortly.
353
00:16:09,840 --> 00:16:11,360
You're gonna come.
Online at the weekend.
354
00:16:11,360 --> 00:16:15,320
We recorded a lot of stuff and
we're again, we're getting
355
00:16:15,320 --> 00:16:16,960
there.
We're just, you know, you're
356
00:16:16,960 --> 00:16:20,920
you're in US within the the
little seedling aspect of the
357
00:16:20,920 --> 00:16:24,040
podcast.
So you can come along with us on
358
00:16:24,040 --> 00:16:25,760
this marvelous ride.
You're charter.
359
00:16:25,760 --> 00:16:27,760
Members, Really.
You're in on the ground floor,
360
00:16:27,760 --> 00:16:30,280
yes.
Finders, founders find the
361
00:16:30,280 --> 00:16:32,320
founders member, the founder
circle.
362
00:16:32,360 --> 00:16:34,120
You're all in the Finder circle
of it.
363
00:16:34,240 --> 00:16:36,040
Well, we'll have to work on
that.
364
00:16:36,040 --> 00:16:37,920
Have like an event or something
in the future.
365
00:16:38,400 --> 00:16:42,400
And so, yeah, just like, share a
comment, follow all of the
366
00:16:42,400 --> 00:16:45,720
things if you feel so inclined.
We would be forever.
367
00:16:45,720 --> 00:16:46,760
Grateful.
Yeah.
368
00:16:46,760 --> 00:16:47,560
OK.
Thanks, friends.
369
00:16:47,560 --> 00:16:50,000
We don't love begging for likes
and comments and all of that,
370
00:16:50,000 --> 00:16:51,840
but we are trying to find an
audience.
371
00:16:52,120 --> 00:16:53,640
Making this podcast is super
fun.
372
00:16:53,640 --> 00:16:56,440
I hope you enjoy listening and
we'd love to be able to continue
373
00:16:56,440 --> 00:16:58,680
it.
So if you would like it to
374
00:16:58,680 --> 00:17:01,000
continue as well, help a hoe
out.
375
00:17:01,440 --> 00:17:03,480
Help.
Help a hoe white That would be
376
00:17:03,480 --> 00:17:08,280
amazing.
Help a hoe We'll we'll make AE
377
00:17:08,280 --> 00:17:12,920
sign so well, on that note, we
also wanted to share some of the
378
00:17:12,920 --> 00:17:15,520
comments and questions we have
gotten so far.
379
00:17:15,920 --> 00:17:17,800
And most of these have come via
text.
380
00:17:17,800 --> 00:17:20,440
And once again, feel free to
make them on our Instagram or
381
00:17:20,440 --> 00:17:23,640
the website or Spotify or Apple
or any of the things.
382
00:17:23,640 --> 00:17:26,680
So yeah, they've been wonderful
texts to get.
383
00:17:26,680 --> 00:17:29,680
So thank you friends.
Yeah, salty Bros and hoes, we're
384
00:17:29,680 --> 00:17:31,880
sharing.
I'm gonna share one because I
385
00:17:31,880 --> 00:17:34,640
feel like this is reflective of
a lot of the ones we get.
386
00:17:35,040 --> 00:17:39,160
So this is a text I got and it
says quote, I love the natural
387
00:17:39,160 --> 00:17:42,120
flow you and Claire have
together as the listener.
388
00:17:42,120 --> 00:17:45,000
It's like we're just sitting in
on a lunch date that you 2 are
389
00:17:45,000 --> 00:17:48,080
having and it feels very natural
and not scripted and I really
390
00:17:48,080 --> 00:17:50,240
enjoy it.
UN quote Thank you so much for
391
00:17:50,240 --> 00:17:52,160
that comment, that's so lovely.
It's what it feels.
392
00:17:52,160 --> 00:17:54,120
Like to us too, it is.
We're just here on a.
393
00:17:54,120 --> 00:17:57,360
Little cute lunch date.
Just chatting, chatting the
394
00:17:57,600 --> 00:17:59,240
chatting the shit.
Is that what you would say?
395
00:17:59,240 --> 00:18:00,880
What's up for you shooting the
shooting?
396
00:18:03,360 --> 00:18:05,400
But I'm gonna start saying
chatting shit.
397
00:18:06,360 --> 00:18:09,440
Some days I feel so broken I
just.
398
00:18:10,000 --> 00:18:13,320
I adore you.
My mind is a weird place.
399
00:18:13,440 --> 00:18:14,960
It's a weird.
Wonderful place.
400
00:18:15,360 --> 00:18:17,320
It's a wonderful place.
Oh dear.
401
00:18:17,320 --> 00:18:20,680
God, I'm, I'm very tired.
I will, I will use that.
402
00:18:20,680 --> 00:18:23,720
But also I'm a little quirky, so
that is fair.
403
00:18:23,720 --> 00:18:25,160
You're a delight.
I love that that's.
404
00:18:25,200 --> 00:18:27,880
Beautiful, do you have?
A comment or two to share I do.
405
00:18:27,880 --> 00:18:30,400
Because I have noticed a trend.
Oh, OK.
406
00:18:30,400 --> 00:18:33,560
Yes, we are strengthening
marriages and relationships
407
00:18:33,560 --> 00:18:34,720
everywhere.
I love that.
408
00:18:34,720 --> 00:18:37,640
For us, yes, And for you, the
listener I know.
409
00:18:38,000 --> 00:18:43,240
I got this from my friend after
they listen to episode 2.
410
00:18:43,400 --> 00:18:44,960
Oh, men who?
Don't use SOAP, yeah.
411
00:18:45,080 --> 00:18:48,040
The the infamous shitty pants
episode, one of our most.
412
00:18:48,040 --> 00:18:52,000
Popular episodes, yes.
And, you know, As for good
413
00:18:52,040 --> 00:18:56,560
reason should be question mark.
Yeah, so I got this and it said
414
00:18:56,600 --> 00:18:59,480
listen to episode 2 of your
podcast.
415
00:18:59,640 --> 00:19:04,040
What the hell, Claire?
I immediately told my husband
416
00:19:04,040 --> 00:19:07,120
how much I love him and
apologize for taking him for
417
00:19:07,120 --> 00:19:10,920
granted for his good hygiene.
Shitty pants, really.
418
00:19:11,120 --> 00:19:15,000
Oh my God.
Oh I love that.
419
00:19:15,000 --> 00:19:19,520
And then this is, oh, this is
one of my dearest friends in
420
00:19:19,520 --> 00:19:22,160
Mirka, one of the first people
like that I met when I moved
421
00:19:22,160 --> 00:19:24,320
here.
And I love her so much.
422
00:19:24,520 --> 00:19:28,400
She's so like deadpan and but
like the best humor, like she
423
00:19:28,400 --> 00:19:31,000
just drops the lines in love
deadpan.
424
00:19:31,000 --> 00:19:35,000
Like I love her humor so much.
And I've never, I've never felt
425
00:19:35,000 --> 00:19:40,160
her so effusive like so she went
on to say, seriously, you should
426
00:19:40,160 --> 00:19:45,240
see his well manicured toenails
and he wipes until he bleeds.
427
00:19:45,720 --> 00:19:48,880
I've never, ever even seen a
skid mark.
428
00:19:50,920 --> 00:19:53,360
So we're strengthening
marriages.
429
00:19:53,600 --> 00:19:57,400
We're strengthening marriages.
And she ended by saying I can't
430
00:19:57,400 --> 00:20:00,120
get divorced now.
I mean, that's fair, yes.
431
00:20:00,120 --> 00:20:02,640
Now, to be clear, we don't
advocate wiping until you bleed,
432
00:20:02,640 --> 00:20:04,120
no.
Don't, don't do that.
433
00:20:04,120 --> 00:20:07,200
But we do like the wiping part.
We do like that there's at least
434
00:20:07,200 --> 00:20:09,600
a, a tendency towards
cleanliness.
435
00:20:09,640 --> 00:20:12,720
Yes, so and pedicure.
Good job, yes.
436
00:20:12,920 --> 00:20:15,520
No clogs, No clogs.
Yeah, no dirt.
437
00:20:15,840 --> 00:20:17,200
Yes, thank you.
She doesn't get.
438
00:20:17,200 --> 00:20:19,200
Scratches up the back of her
calves in bed.
439
00:20:22,080 --> 00:20:24,040
So, so you look at us.
We're strengthening.
440
00:20:24,120 --> 00:20:26,280
Strengthening marriages by the
horror.
441
00:20:27,280 --> 00:20:30,520
All right, We've also had a few
questions that have come our
442
00:20:30,520 --> 00:20:34,280
way, so we wanted to address a
couple of those, and I'll start
443
00:20:34,280 --> 00:20:36,960
with 1.
So someone asked me, how much do
444
00:20:36,960 --> 00:20:39,640
you edit your episodes?
So in other words, how much do
445
00:20:39,640 --> 00:20:42,240
you record for one hour of the
podcast?
446
00:20:42,320 --> 00:20:45,680
Yeah, it's a great question.
And the answer is simple answer.
447
00:20:45,680 --> 00:20:47,760
Simple answer.
We do these in one take.
448
00:20:47,760 --> 00:20:50,000
We basically do not edit them at
all.
449
00:20:50,760 --> 00:20:54,040
I think there have been all of
two times where we paused
450
00:20:54,040 --> 00:20:57,120
because either we really messed
something up or there was a
451
00:20:57,280 --> 00:20:58,800
coughing fit.
There was a day.
452
00:20:58,800 --> 00:21:00,520
Of coughing.
There was a day of fit by me,
453
00:21:00,600 --> 00:21:01,280
yes.
Yeah.
454
00:21:01,600 --> 00:21:03,120
I think I might have had one too
at one point.
455
00:21:03,120 --> 00:21:05,160
Yeah.
So we just like, stopped, backed
456
00:21:05,160 --> 00:21:07,760
it up like one or two minutes
and picked it up from there.
457
00:21:07,760 --> 00:21:10,960
But basically everything you
hear is just in one take.
458
00:21:11,080 --> 00:21:13,120
Yeah.
Which might be actually quite
459
00:21:13,120 --> 00:21:15,000
obvious That's.
True.
460
00:21:15,000 --> 00:21:19,400
At times, yeah, we're like.
Maybe that doesn't surprise.
461
00:21:19,400 --> 00:21:21,760
Anyone don't?
They're like, well done.
462
00:21:22,200 --> 00:21:26,160
Of course, they're like, well,
and we have another question
463
00:21:26,160 --> 00:21:30,200
that is very much adjacent to
that question, which is how much
464
00:21:30,200 --> 00:21:32,640
of the podcast is Scripture
scriptured?
465
00:21:32,960 --> 00:21:35,200
Scriptured.
Oh, dear God, None of it going
466
00:21:35,200 --> 00:21:37,680
back to my mom and roots.
Or or we could just make it
467
00:21:37,680 --> 00:21:39,720
Scripture.
Yeah, the book of Claire and
468
00:21:39,720 --> 00:21:42,520
Mel, The book of Claire Mel.
We'll do we live scripture study
469
00:21:42,520 --> 00:21:43,600
one week.
There we go.
470
00:21:43,800 --> 00:21:47,440
Oh, God.
Oh, well, script head was what I
471
00:21:47,440 --> 00:21:51,000
meant to say.
And the answer is mostly not at
472
00:21:51,000 --> 00:21:53,240
all.
Again, maybe you can tell.
473
00:21:53,240 --> 00:21:56,040
Yes, it's like, well.
Clearly because they're all over
474
00:21:56,040 --> 00:21:58,680
the place.
But you know, we like to, we
475
00:21:58,680 --> 00:22:01,440
like to lean into the tangents
because sometimes it opens up a
476
00:22:01,440 --> 00:22:03,280
whole other beautiful story, but
fun.
477
00:22:03,440 --> 00:22:07,640
Sometimes we have a wee outline.
I will say shout out to Mel
478
00:22:07,640 --> 00:22:11,720
cause mostly when she's in
charge of the episode, there's
479
00:22:11,720 --> 00:22:14,520
like a beautiful scripted
outline.
480
00:22:14,520 --> 00:22:18,760
And when I'm leading the charge
on the I'll just normally run in
481
00:22:18,760 --> 00:22:21,240
the door 10 minutes sleep, be
like, I have some notes on my
482
00:22:21,280 --> 00:22:25,720
phone.
So Mel is the queen of, of, of
483
00:22:25,720 --> 00:22:28,560
like, you know, preparedness
sort.
484
00:22:28,640 --> 00:22:31,120
Of I mean, thank you, that's
very kind of you.
485
00:22:31,800 --> 00:22:35,400
But I will say that usually we
don't have a script exactly.
486
00:22:35,400 --> 00:22:39,080
We might script a very short or
like the outline exactly, but
487
00:22:39,080 --> 00:22:42,400
usually it's like an outline and
you all know that sometimes we
488
00:22:42,400 --> 00:22:45,320
share statistics or we might
talk about an article and then
489
00:22:45,320 --> 00:22:48,120
of course we have that in front
of us to refer to.
490
00:22:48,880 --> 00:22:52,040
But generally we have no script.
And I will also say that the
491
00:22:52,040 --> 00:22:54,960
very tiny portions that we have
tried to script before, we
492
00:22:54,960 --> 00:22:57,920
immediately go off script and
never come back.
493
00:22:58,080 --> 00:23:00,040
It's.
Like Nope, As you may have
494
00:23:00,040 --> 00:23:04,600
noticed with our introductions.
Yeah, when I still the shame of
495
00:23:04,800 --> 00:23:07,400
believing that was a hurry water
time.
496
00:23:07,400 --> 00:23:08,720
Oh, that was hilarious.
Yeah.
497
00:23:08,800 --> 00:23:13,320
So, you know, we're just we're
just, you know, putting it all
498
00:23:13,320 --> 00:23:14,880
out there.
We have our process.
499
00:23:14,880 --> 00:23:16,520
Yeah, and it works for us.
It works.
500
00:23:16,520 --> 00:23:19,760
For us, it may not work for
anybody else on the planet, but
501
00:23:19,760 --> 00:23:21,960
it works for us.
But yeah, mostly you're just
502
00:23:21,960 --> 00:23:27,040
overhearing a very genuine
conversation and we're, we're
503
00:23:27,040 --> 00:23:28,760
just here keeping it real
friends.
504
00:23:28,760 --> 00:23:35,120
Yep, Yep.
As you can see from that awkward
505
00:23:35,120 --> 00:23:38,440
pause when it's like, OK, all
right.
506
00:23:38,560 --> 00:23:42,120
We have also had a couple of
other questions, Mel, specific
507
00:23:42,120 --> 00:23:45,880
to you, OK, because they're
about Mr. 11.
508
00:23:46,440 --> 00:23:48,640
We've not chatted about him in
some time so.
509
00:23:49,280 --> 00:23:53,000
Infamous Mr. 11 Yep, I.
Have had several requests even
510
00:23:53,000 --> 00:23:56,400
to me of what does he look like?
We want to see what he looks
511
00:23:56,400 --> 00:24:00,880
like so well, give us an update
or tell us more about Mr. 11.
512
00:24:00,880 --> 00:24:03,400
OK, Well, I.
Am gonna protect this person's
513
00:24:03,560 --> 00:24:06,400
privacy in the sense that I will
not be disseminating pictures.
514
00:24:06,400 --> 00:24:07,120
Yeah, no.
Pictures.
515
00:24:07,120 --> 00:24:10,680
Sorry lads, I have.
Many, but I will be keeping them
516
00:24:10,680 --> 00:24:12,800
to myself.
Yeah, and occasionally showing
517
00:24:12,800 --> 00:24:14,880
you some of them.
Claire, thank you.
518
00:24:15,320 --> 00:24:17,720
But from the bottom.
Of my I feel like.
519
00:24:17,720 --> 00:24:19,040
Heart.
I don't know.
520
00:24:19,040 --> 00:24:21,280
I feel like when I listened to
our first episode and I felt
521
00:24:21,280 --> 00:24:23,920
like wow, that sounds like
hyperbole, but let me assure you
522
00:24:23,960 --> 00:24:25,480
it is not.
I can.
523
00:24:25,480 --> 00:24:26,760
Confirm.
Yeah, so.
524
00:24:26,760 --> 00:24:30,440
This man has been mistaken in
public when his hair was
525
00:24:30,440 --> 00:24:34,080
shorter, I'll say for Ryan
Gosling multiple times.
526
00:24:34,320 --> 00:24:34,880
Wow.
Yeah.
527
00:24:35,000 --> 00:24:36,520
So that gives.
You an idea?
528
00:24:36,520 --> 00:24:40,160
Gives you an idea.
Yeah, he's gorgeous.
529
00:24:40,160 --> 00:24:42,680
Now he's grown his hair out and
I think he looks like a Viking
530
00:24:42,680 --> 00:24:43,720
God.
He does look.
531
00:24:43,720 --> 00:24:46,280
Like a Viking gog.
A Viking GOG.
532
00:24:47,400 --> 00:24:52,080
He's a Viking dog.
Because there's just so like, my
533
00:24:52,080 --> 00:24:55,240
wee brain was going too fast for
my mic there, but because I was
534
00:24:55,240 --> 00:24:57,600
just thinking about piercing
eyes.
535
00:24:58,600 --> 00:25:03,240
Lovely hair, which is a rarity
this point in natural blonde.
536
00:25:03,240 --> 00:25:06,640
Hair yes just gorgeous 63
perfect body but.
537
00:25:07,000 --> 00:25:10,400
Yeah, it's like, you know, and
Mel has kept it classy.
538
00:25:10,400 --> 00:25:14,040
I have not seen anything that I
shouldn't be seeing, just to
539
00:25:14,040 --> 00:25:16,360
point that out.
We share some things, but not
540
00:25:16,360 --> 00:25:18,560
all things.
So but I there's things you
541
00:25:18,560 --> 00:25:20,080
don't.
Need to see in my phone no?
542
00:25:20,320 --> 00:25:22,040
And that's fine, That's that's
good.
543
00:25:22,040 --> 00:25:23,520
I just need to see your reaction
to them.
544
00:25:23,520 --> 00:25:27,480
And that's enough.
But his little chesticles, not
545
00:25:27,480 --> 00:25:31,560
to be confused with other parts.
This little testicle area is
546
00:25:31,560 --> 00:25:33,320
just so oh.
My God.
547
00:25:33,520 --> 00:25:39,160
Claire, it's just so fine
because it's not now I.
548
00:25:39,160 --> 00:25:42,040
Almost want to stop and go back
and delete this, but you know
549
00:25:42,040 --> 00:25:43,360
what?
We're not going to This is our.
550
00:25:43,360 --> 00:25:47,640
Process and I stand by it.
I feel like that is a sister a
551
00:25:47,640 --> 00:25:50,280
word my sister told me.
I am having speech problems
552
00:25:50,280 --> 00:25:53,120
today clearly, so I apologize.
I've never heard that.
553
00:25:53,120 --> 00:25:55,840
One, I've heard moobs before,
but then stuff usually like
554
00:25:55,840 --> 00:25:58,040
implies they're more like fatty.
It's not.
555
00:25:58,040 --> 00:25:59,800
Like a good thing, yeah, but
it's.
556
00:25:59,800 --> 00:26:02,880
Just.
A generic term to decide the to
557
00:26:02,880 --> 00:26:05,040
decide.
Oh my God have I had a
558
00:26:05,040 --> 00:26:12,000
neurological event to describe
that The dekotage area.
559
00:26:12,760 --> 00:26:15,640
Oh my God, I love that word.
Friends, we're not even
560
00:26:15,640 --> 00:26:18,960
drinking, but I want to now.
You know, I actually may have
561
00:26:18,960 --> 00:26:21,600
taken double meds today.
I I'm going to say that on
562
00:26:21,600 --> 00:26:25,000
accident because my wheel arm
went off, but I was in a meeting
563
00:26:25,000 --> 00:26:26,880
and I can't remember if I took
it and then I took another one
564
00:26:26,880 --> 00:26:29,320
in the way here.
So there is every chance that I
565
00:26:29,320 --> 00:26:31,920
am double adderalled up for this
episode.
566
00:26:31,920 --> 00:26:32,840
I love.
That Yep.
567
00:26:33,200 --> 00:26:35,560
So.
It's our most unhinged episode
568
00:26:35,560 --> 00:26:36,680
yet, everyone.
Yay.
569
00:26:36,760 --> 00:26:38,120
Aren't you glad you're here?
Well, the.
570
00:26:38,120 --> 00:26:42,200
Problem is, it's like my Brian
is just going so much faster
571
00:26:42,200 --> 00:26:44,760
than my mice can keep up with.
Yeah, even with an.
572
00:26:44,760 --> 00:26:46,600
Irish accent because we tend to
speak fast.
573
00:26:46,600 --> 00:26:49,160
So.
So yes, back to Mr. 11.
574
00:26:49,160 --> 00:26:51,600
Now let's move.
On I feel like we've covered Mr.
575
00:26:51,600 --> 00:26:54,640
11 in probably more detail.
Well, I we need to.
576
00:26:54,640 --> 00:26:58,160
I will just add that there are
many listeners that do hope you
577
00:26:58,160 --> 00:27:00,040
get your 711.
We'll see.
578
00:27:00,200 --> 00:27:03,640
That is not.
The prognosis isn't looking
579
00:27:03,680 --> 00:27:07,080
really good at this point.
Well, we will live in hope.
580
00:27:07,360 --> 00:27:09,040
Stay, stay.
Posted Stay tuned.
581
00:27:09,520 --> 00:27:10,720
Stay tuned.
All right, let's.
582
00:27:10,880 --> 00:27:15,160
Move on to.
A serious a serious topic.
583
00:27:15,200 --> 00:27:16,680
I regret answering that
question.
584
00:27:17,720 --> 00:27:20,320
Sorry, I took that really
sideways today.
585
00:27:20,600 --> 00:27:21,480
That's all right.
I.
586
00:27:21,640 --> 00:27:23,440
I love it.
OK, I sort of love it.
587
00:27:23,440 --> 00:27:25,400
I'm so glad you.
Do let's get you're like, sort
588
00:27:25,400 --> 00:27:28,240
of, let's get to the meat.
Of our podcast OK, the meat, the
589
00:27:28,400 --> 00:27:33,000
meat, the 68 inches of our
podcast today we had planned to
590
00:27:33,440 --> 00:27:35,840
kind of talk about the male
loneliness epidemic.
591
00:27:35,920 --> 00:27:37,440
There's a phrase we've all
heard, right?
592
00:27:37,720 --> 00:27:39,440
I feel like.
I just want to play a little
593
00:27:39,440 --> 00:27:41,840
violin music here, but yeah,
tiny.
594
00:27:41,840 --> 00:27:44,840
Violin a wee.
Tiny little small one.
595
00:27:45,440 --> 00:27:46,600
Yep.
Yeah.
596
00:27:47,240 --> 00:27:50,000
All right, well, do you think
this is a real thing you.
597
00:27:50,000 --> 00:27:57,400
Know yes and no OK because sure
they're lonely and also yes like
598
00:27:57,400 --> 00:28:01,600
some of them but but like why
this is what I would like to get
599
00:28:01,600 --> 00:28:05,040
to because I feel like a lot of
things you know women are blamed
600
00:28:05,040 --> 00:28:09,920
for this but the men's are
definitely feeling lonely and as
601
00:28:09,920 --> 00:28:13,480
we love a good data set we have
some Pew stats because we love
602
00:28:13,480 --> 00:28:18,840
Pew in particular hell yeah yes
from 2025 S these are recent hot
603
00:28:18,880 --> 00:28:24,000
off the press hot off the press
that shows 16% of men and 15% of
604
00:28:24,000 --> 00:28:29,000
women feel lonely or isolated
almost all of the time so that's
605
00:28:29,000 --> 00:28:32,360
pretty equal.
That's 16 versus 15%, yes.
606
00:28:32,360 --> 00:28:36,000
So maybe we should call this a
person loneliness epidemic, not
607
00:28:36,000 --> 00:28:38,320
a male loneliness epidemic, I
mean.
608
00:28:38,560 --> 00:28:42,400
I you and I both have experience
with data and a 1% difference
609
00:28:42,440 --> 00:28:45,400
does not feel notable in this
particular instance.
610
00:28:45,400 --> 00:28:47,400
I mean, it may.
Be within the margin of error
611
00:28:47,400 --> 00:28:49,560
for a study like this.
I don't know how big the sample
612
00:28:49,560 --> 00:28:53,000
size was, but that seems like
it's probably the same.
613
00:28:53,320 --> 00:28:55,560
So we we're we're.
Basically all lonely.
614
00:28:55,560 --> 00:28:58,960
So, well, some humans.
Are lonely, I mean 15 or 16%
615
00:28:59,320 --> 00:29:01,760
feeling lonely most of the time,
I mean that is quite sad for
616
00:29:01,760 --> 00:29:03,440
them.
Yes, I don't love that.
617
00:29:03,440 --> 00:29:08,000
And yes, you know, 15% isn't a
majority by any means, but it's
618
00:29:08,240 --> 00:29:10,880
a sizable chunk.
And I think what's key there is
619
00:29:10,880 --> 00:29:15,120
like all the time, yeah, because
obviously we'll get vulnerable
620
00:29:15,120 --> 00:29:17,920
here.
We we all feel it at some point
621
00:29:18,000 --> 00:29:20,560
right in, in some degree or
another.
622
00:29:20,880 --> 00:29:23,240
So, yeah.
What, what does that look like
623
00:29:23,240 --> 00:29:24,200
for you?
Well, yeah, I.
624
00:29:24,200 --> 00:29:27,360
Mean, especially if you're
single, right, That my days are
625
00:29:27,360 --> 00:29:28,520
pretty busy.
Yeah.
626
00:29:28,600 --> 00:29:32,600
I have a wide circle of friends
and I have a number of really
627
00:29:32,600 --> 00:29:35,160
close friends that I see
multiple times a week.
628
00:29:35,280 --> 00:29:38,800
So I wouldn't say that, you
know, I'm definitely not in this
629
00:29:38,840 --> 00:29:42,800
15 or 16%.
Like I am not lonely most of the
630
00:29:42,800 --> 00:29:43,400
time.
Yeah.
631
00:29:43,560 --> 00:29:47,000
I feel surrounded by people who
I love, who love me.
632
00:29:47,000 --> 00:29:48,440
I feel supported.
Yeah.
633
00:29:48,480 --> 00:29:50,200
I feel great.
You know, I have my son with me
634
00:29:50,200 --> 00:29:52,160
a lot of the times, so there's
that as well.
635
00:29:52,160 --> 00:29:53,400
Yeah.
But you know what?
636
00:29:53,400 --> 00:29:56,000
There are times like when I
don't have my son or after he's
637
00:29:56,000 --> 00:29:58,800
gone to bed and you're sitting
there on the couch all alone and
638
00:29:58,800 --> 00:30:02,760
you're like, well, kind of would
be nice to have somebody sitting
639
00:30:02,760 --> 00:30:04,040
next to me.
Yes.
640
00:30:04,280 --> 00:30:08,440
That's fair and very relatable
and it it'll catch you at like
641
00:30:08,520 --> 00:30:12,600
wee moments.
So, you know, like you, I, I
642
00:30:12,600 --> 00:30:15,360
have a very busy life and it's
very busier than mine.
643
00:30:15,440 --> 00:30:16,000
For sure.
Well.
644
00:30:16,280 --> 00:30:22,440
Probably not with as much fun
things because you know, as as
645
00:30:22,440 --> 00:30:26,320
you can tell, I I you know, I
don't maybe think the most
646
00:30:26,320 --> 00:30:29,840
straight of lots of humans and
take a lot on, but mostly
647
00:30:29,840 --> 00:30:32,600
enjoyable things.
But you know, good friends
648
00:30:32,720 --> 00:30:35,120
support.
I speak to my sister, even
649
00:30:35,120 --> 00:30:36,560
though she's 5 1/2 thousand
miles away.
650
00:30:36,560 --> 00:30:39,360
We talk every morning.
I usually call her my way into
651
00:30:39,360 --> 00:30:41,080
work.
We have a little video call,
652
00:30:41,080 --> 00:30:43,320
which is probably quite
dangerous, but I just sat her
653
00:30:43,320 --> 00:30:45,760
there.
She watches me drive, she
654
00:30:45,760 --> 00:30:47,000
watches me drive.
I kind.
655
00:30:47,000 --> 00:30:49,080
Of love that that's really sweet
so I.
656
00:30:49,080 --> 00:30:54,200
Do have close relationships, my
kids, one of my kids lives far
657
00:30:54,200 --> 00:30:57,960
away in Mirka, one of them is in
Ireland right now for her
658
00:30:57,960 --> 00:31:02,000
masters and my wee son is back
home for a semester, which I
659
00:31:02,000 --> 00:31:04,480
love.
But there are those moments.
660
00:31:04,560 --> 00:31:07,160
I had one just last night tell
me.
661
00:31:07,320 --> 00:31:10,440
So yesterday was a really rough
day.
662
00:31:10,440 --> 00:31:13,640
It was just sorry.
Well, it was just like there was
663
00:31:13,640 --> 00:31:18,520
just a lot happening and it was
very like emotionally draining.
664
00:31:18,800 --> 00:31:21,160
It was also just a very, very
long day.
665
00:31:21,480 --> 00:31:26,880
And I also had like a three hour
night class in, in a, in a
666
00:31:26,880 --> 00:31:30,560
topic, shall we say, that I'm
not very proficient in.
667
00:31:31,000 --> 00:31:34,440
And I love to learn new things,
but it's deeply challenging,
668
00:31:34,440 --> 00:31:38,120
especially when I've been like,
at work all day long, it sounds.
669
00:31:38,120 --> 00:31:41,160
Very tiring.
And I will also say that a three
670
00:31:41,160 --> 00:31:45,480
hour class is kind of a lot.
I've taught a three hour class
671
00:31:45,560 --> 00:31:47,920
before and Oh my God.
And there are.
672
00:31:47,920 --> 00:31:51,560
Some professors who have a
lengthy break and or finish
673
00:31:51,560 --> 00:31:54,200
early.
This particular 1 does not.
674
00:31:54,880 --> 00:31:58,560
And I appreciate the rigor I do.
I really do like I am learning
675
00:31:58,560 --> 00:32:03,440
so much and and last week I left
elated and last night before I
676
00:32:03,440 --> 00:32:07,640
even got there I I just felt
like I wanted to cry but also
677
00:32:07,640 --> 00:32:11,000
that I was like so tired that I
actually couldn't perform the
678
00:32:11,000 --> 00:32:13,120
function.
Too tired?
679
00:32:13,240 --> 00:32:15,680
Yes, And I.
Had like a wee headache and then
680
00:32:15,680 --> 00:32:19,720
I had the realization as I was
driving up to EU that oh, you
681
00:32:19,760 --> 00:32:23,800
actually haven't eaten apart
from 2 little Abe's muffins
682
00:32:23,800 --> 00:32:25,640
today.
Shout out to Abe's muffins.
683
00:32:25,640 --> 00:32:29,040
So good.
But that was not product
684
00:32:29,040 --> 00:32:29,760
placement.
By the way.
685
00:32:29,920 --> 00:32:31,240
They should sponsor.
Us they should.
686
00:32:31,400 --> 00:32:32,800
Because their muffins are really
good.
687
00:32:32,800 --> 00:32:34,280
I haven't tried.
Them I don't know what's.
688
00:32:34,280 --> 00:32:36,600
In them because they're
literally free from everything.
689
00:32:36,600 --> 00:32:39,000
I'm like, are they made out of
sawdust?
690
00:32:39,280 --> 00:32:40,960
But they don't.
They're moist.
691
00:32:41,720 --> 00:32:44,000
I will say the word well,
they're very moist.
692
00:32:44,240 --> 00:32:45,360
I don't mind.
That word yes, I.
693
00:32:45,360 --> 00:32:50,320
Like a little moistness.
So so yes, I got there and I
694
00:32:50,320 --> 00:32:54,880
honestly just felt terrible.
I had overdone it this weekend
695
00:32:54,920 --> 00:32:58,000
on the Inferno Pilates.
I'm going to sober all.
696
00:32:58,320 --> 00:33:01,600
It's like, weirdly, my
relaxation when I'm very tired,
697
00:33:01,600 --> 00:33:04,280
which is stupid and doesn't make
any sense.
698
00:33:05,080 --> 00:33:08,400
It's like I'm exhausted.
So let's go to a class that is
699
00:33:08,400 --> 00:33:12,160
in 103 degree heat and deeply
taxing.
700
00:33:12,440 --> 00:33:15,400
And yeah, it's probably not an
effective way to relax, but,
701
00:33:15,440 --> 00:33:17,320
well, I can't think of worse.
Ways to relax.
702
00:33:17,320 --> 00:33:19,240
I mean, at least you're not, I
don't know, drinking a whole
703
00:33:19,240 --> 00:33:20,920
bottle of wine by yourself.
That's true.
704
00:33:20,960 --> 00:33:24,720
Or that's true, you know, at
home, smoking weed, doing
705
00:33:24,720 --> 00:33:29,360
animals, using your crack pipe.
Only if I match with that dude
706
00:33:29,440 --> 00:33:32,800
or your dude CR salty bites for
more info.
707
00:33:33,160 --> 00:33:37,000
But yeah, it's I'm this story is
taking way too long.
708
00:33:37,280 --> 00:33:40,680
Needless to say, it was a hard
day and I was sitting in the
709
00:33:40,680 --> 00:33:43,080
class.
I was jiggling my leg to stay
710
00:33:43,080 --> 00:33:45,640
awake because I kept doing the
bobbing head thing.
711
00:33:45,640 --> 00:33:48,440
I hate that.
And I was like, everything hurts
712
00:33:48,440 --> 00:33:50,320
and I'm so hungry.
And I just thought, you know
713
00:33:50,320 --> 00:33:53,720
what, I would love to go home
and for somebody just to wrap me
714
00:33:53,720 --> 00:33:57,080
in a blanket and give me food.
Yes, that's all I wanted.
715
00:33:57,480 --> 00:33:59,360
I just wanted to be wrapped in a
blanket.
716
00:33:59,360 --> 00:34:02,960
I didn't care what the food was.
I just needed food.
717
00:34:03,440 --> 00:34:05,760
Oh my.
God, girl, that hits so deep.
718
00:34:05,760 --> 00:34:09,840
Yeah, it is hard to do
everything yourself all the.
719
00:34:09,840 --> 00:34:11,000
Things.
Yeah.
720
00:34:11,000 --> 00:34:13,440
And I I.
Love having someone to take care
721
00:34:13,440 --> 00:34:16,760
of, but I love when they want to
take care of me too.
722
00:34:16,760 --> 00:34:17,719
Yes.
Yeah.
723
00:34:17,719 --> 00:34:21,280
And I think neither of us maybe
had that as a should we say it
724
00:34:21,280 --> 00:34:23,840
wasn't the number one?
Feature of our marriage.
725
00:34:24,159 --> 00:34:27,960
Is necessarily it was not or any
subsequent.
726
00:34:28,080 --> 00:34:31,440
Had relationships, which was
what like snapped me right back
727
00:34:31,560 --> 00:34:35,719
because I was like, oh wait, in
any of your relationships,
728
00:34:35,719 --> 00:34:38,440
including especially Mr. Shitty
Pants, I would have been going
729
00:34:38,440 --> 00:34:41,800
home to make him dinner.
So you know, and that's also on
730
00:34:41,800 --> 00:34:44,400
me, But you know, that snaps you
back real quick.
731
00:34:44,400 --> 00:34:47,120
So you probably would have taken
an Uber because he had your car.
732
00:34:50,159 --> 00:34:52,040
And then you would have had to
cook something.
733
00:34:53,320 --> 00:34:56,480
But had the Uber stop at the
store and then use my money.
734
00:34:58,720 --> 00:35:02,560
Oh my God.
And then the cherry and top gone
735
00:35:02,560 --> 00:35:06,440
home and cleaned up his shit.
Taking his pants into the
736
00:35:06,440 --> 00:35:09,120
shower.
Oh my God, for decontamination.
737
00:35:10,160 --> 00:35:15,160
It was a beautiful light.
I mean, Oh dear God, being
738
00:35:15,200 --> 00:35:16,760
single isn't the worst thing out
there.
739
00:35:16,800 --> 00:35:19,160
Y'all, it's actually not.
And like you say, those
740
00:35:19,160 --> 00:35:22,880
recollections will snap you back
from from the brink of
741
00:35:22,880 --> 00:35:24,720
loneliness.
So I just.
742
00:35:24,920 --> 00:35:26,240
Yeah, Yeah.
But we do.
743
00:35:26,240 --> 00:35:29,000
Know and believe that there are
men out there, yes, that are not
744
00:35:29,000 --> 00:35:32,080
like that who would in fact.
Wrap you in a blanket and get
745
00:35:32,080 --> 00:35:34,320
you food.
And give you a hug, yes.
746
00:35:34,320 --> 00:35:38,240
And just listen to you, yes.
Like, cuz I, I at that point, I
747
00:35:38,240 --> 00:35:41,560
would have just came home and,
like, you know, sobbed and said
748
00:35:42,280 --> 00:35:44,400
incomprehensible things.
But then I would have felt
749
00:35:44,400 --> 00:35:45,800
better.
Yes.
750
00:35:46,520 --> 00:35:48,960
So instead I got home and
realized that I hadn't done
751
00:35:49,360 --> 00:35:53,920
homework on birth rates and
poverty and developing nations.
752
00:35:53,920 --> 00:35:58,320
So I just pulled the car over.
I ordered a Chipotle bowl.
753
00:35:58,320 --> 00:36:01,080
Thank you, Chipotle.
And I picked it up in the drive
754
00:36:01,080 --> 00:36:03,440
through.
And I wrapped myself in a
755
00:36:03,440 --> 00:36:07,880
blanket and watched my little
PowerPoint lecture on double
756
00:36:07,880 --> 00:36:09,680
speed.
Oh, my God, Yeah.
757
00:36:10,000 --> 00:36:12,720
It was a good night.
Sure.
758
00:36:13,800 --> 00:36:18,280
OK, I just decided that when
these classes are over, I am
759
00:36:18,280 --> 00:36:20,600
taking you for a spa day.
You're so sweet.
760
00:36:20,600 --> 00:36:21,920
For real.
You need it so.
761
00:36:23,080 --> 00:36:24,600
You're like, it is an
intervention.
762
00:36:24,640 --> 00:36:26,560
I mean I.
Feel like if I suggested it
763
00:36:26,560 --> 00:36:28,200
right now, you'd be like, no, I
don't have time.
764
00:36:28,200 --> 00:36:30,200
I need to write.
That would be like take five
765
00:36:30,200 --> 00:36:33,600
classes and teach 3 yoga classes
and all this stuff that when
766
00:36:33,800 --> 00:36:36,360
things calm down a little bit,
we're going to the spa.
767
00:36:36,480 --> 00:36:38,200
You're wee Tim.
I'll take it.
768
00:36:38,360 --> 00:36:39,240
Thank you.
OK, good.
769
00:36:39,240 --> 00:36:41,680
I will take it.
You need it, I know so not.
770
00:36:41,680 --> 00:36:43,280
Much time to get lonely, though.
That's.
771
00:36:43,280 --> 00:36:46,320
That's the upside, right?
Yeah, I guess so.
772
00:36:46,360 --> 00:36:49,480
Yeah, Yeah, we have.
We have mentioned the skin
773
00:36:49,480 --> 00:36:53,880
hunger before and to be clear
sometimes it comes in the form
774
00:36:53,920 --> 00:36:59,400
of sex but other times it it's
just in, you know, being.
775
00:36:59,400 --> 00:37:01,840
Held hugs and stuff or a foot
rub.
776
00:37:02,200 --> 00:37:03,440
Yeah, or we neck.
Rub.
777
00:37:03,840 --> 00:37:06,200
Yeah.
Something back, Scratch some
778
00:37:06,200 --> 00:37:08,600
touch something.
That'd be nice, yeah.
779
00:37:09,080 --> 00:37:13,560
So when these moments hit, how
do you like deal with them?
780
00:37:14,760 --> 00:37:19,160
Well, I don't do Pilates,
Inferno or whatever that is.
781
00:37:19,160 --> 00:37:22,800
Maybe I should?
Yes, because you're just so
782
00:37:22,800 --> 00:37:25,800
deadbeat after that.
You're like, you'll just
783
00:37:25,800 --> 00:37:28,040
collapse into a heap.
And yeah, I mean.
784
00:37:28,040 --> 00:37:32,400
I would say that my normal go to
method is to distract myself.
785
00:37:32,400 --> 00:37:34,560
Yeah.
So I'll, I don't know, turn on
786
00:37:34,560 --> 00:37:36,760
an episode of Real Housewives.
Sorry.
787
00:37:36,880 --> 00:37:41,240
Yeah, I don't know, like try to
read a book or doom scroll on
788
00:37:41,240 --> 00:37:43,080
Instagram.
I don't know, just anything to
789
00:37:43,080 --> 00:37:46,000
like, take my mind off it.
Maybe that's not the most
790
00:37:46,000 --> 00:37:49,120
healthy way to cope with it.
It's not.
791
00:37:49,160 --> 00:37:50,640
Unhealthy.
It's not terrible.
792
00:37:50,640 --> 00:37:52,600
I mean, again, it's not the
Crack Pipe, it's not a whole
793
00:37:52,600 --> 00:37:55,480
bottle of wine, right?
It's not dragging myself into
794
00:37:55,560 --> 00:37:58,760
oblivion.
Yes, But yeah, I, I, I.
795
00:37:58,760 --> 00:38:04,280
Have received the advice from
therapists that distraction is
796
00:38:04,280 --> 00:38:08,400
actually a really good thing to
do when you're you feel like
797
00:38:08,400 --> 00:38:11,880
either you're spiraling, whether
that's loneliness or stress or
798
00:38:11,880 --> 00:38:14,880
worrying over a certain thing.
So, you know, I think that's a
799
00:38:14,880 --> 00:38:18,520
tried and true method, yeah.
I think that as long as it's not
800
00:38:18,520 --> 00:38:20,400
the only method you're
deploying, right?
801
00:38:20,400 --> 00:38:24,160
If you're distracting instead of
trying to, you know, do the work
802
00:38:24,160 --> 00:38:26,360
or solve the problem or
whatever, and that's all you do,
803
00:38:26,360 --> 00:38:28,880
then maybe that's not the best.
But I agree with like sometimes
804
00:38:28,880 --> 00:38:31,240
in the moment it's like, well,
what am I gonna do now?
805
00:38:31,240 --> 00:38:32,840
Like get on Tinder and find a
hookup?
806
00:38:32,840 --> 00:38:34,640
Probably not.
Yes, probably.
807
00:38:34,640 --> 00:38:38,240
Not mostly because there's not a
lot of options.
808
00:38:38,280 --> 00:38:39,880
Well, yeah, I mean, that's part
of it.
809
00:38:39,880 --> 00:38:42,480
Cuz then you're like, oh God, I
would like, I do like sift
810
00:38:42,480 --> 00:38:45,920
through the dumpster fire on
Tinder to even find someone.
811
00:38:45,920 --> 00:38:48,680
I would want to, you know, I
mean, by that time it's bedtime.
812
00:38:48,760 --> 00:38:50,400
Yeah, I'm tired.
You're just like, I'm tired and
813
00:38:50,400 --> 00:38:54,640
go to sleep and typically.
I, you know, I don't want to be
814
00:38:54,640 --> 00:39:00,000
little like mental health or any
like big things, but it's, I
815
00:39:00,000 --> 00:39:04,640
think it's generally true that
like a snack and a sleep, yeah,
816
00:39:04,640 --> 00:39:08,760
they solve a lot.
Not solve entirely, but you will
817
00:39:08,840 --> 00:39:11,160
feel better after both of these
things.
818
00:39:11,160 --> 00:39:11,680
Yeah.
Or.
819
00:39:11,880 --> 00:39:14,520
A We walk, yeah.
Look at me.
820
00:39:14,520 --> 00:39:16,640
He's like me again.
She's like.
821
00:39:16,840 --> 00:39:20,520
Please let that be the only
thing that rubs off and not the
822
00:39:20,520 --> 00:39:24,160
weirdness of words and racing
brain.
823
00:39:24,320 --> 00:39:26,760
I love your chaotic energy.
It's very.
824
00:39:26,800 --> 00:39:28,400
Attractive it is a little.
Chaotic.
825
00:39:28,520 --> 00:39:31,200
This may be why I don't get a
lot of deets, but yeah.
826
00:39:31,200 --> 00:39:34,800
I don't think that's why.
Yeah, there there could be a
827
00:39:34,800 --> 00:39:37,880
whole multitude of reasons so.
I think the reason is that
828
00:39:37,880 --> 00:39:40,720
you're you're picky and a lot of
men that would like to date you
829
00:39:40,720 --> 00:39:43,400
don't meet your standards.
Let's go with that.
830
00:39:43,400 --> 00:39:45,520
I don't like it, too picky.
I'm not saying that.
831
00:39:45,560 --> 00:39:46,040
Oh no.
I'm.
832
00:39:46,040 --> 00:39:49,440
Not, but I like.
I should have been more picky,
833
00:39:49,560 --> 00:39:51,400
yeah.
In the past, yeah, it is.
834
00:39:51,400 --> 00:39:54,880
True years of dating breaks and
therapy that I have and I
835
00:39:54,920 --> 00:39:59,680
learned to actually be picky and
not be like oh look red flag let
836
00:39:59,680 --> 00:40:02,000
me help you carry that I can
save.
837
00:40:02,200 --> 00:40:03,440
You.
Oh.
838
00:40:03,800 --> 00:40:06,360
Bouquet of red flags for me, I
will.
839
00:40:06,360 --> 00:40:09,960
Carry all of them.
You must have rest, my love.
840
00:40:10,000 --> 00:40:11,480
Yeah.
No, we're not doing that again.
841
00:40:11,480 --> 00:40:12,680
No more.
Of that we're not.
842
00:40:12,680 --> 00:40:14,280
We're not doing that.
That's all done.
843
00:40:14,320 --> 00:40:17,120
That's all done.
So what I'm hearing is that
844
00:40:17,120 --> 00:40:19,280
maybe some of these techniques
actually work.
845
00:40:19,880 --> 00:40:23,360
Yeah, I think.
So yeah, I don't know, maybe so.
846
00:40:23,360 --> 00:40:26,640
What are the men's doing?
Why is the focus on the men's
847
00:40:26,920 --> 00:40:29,080
loneliness?
That's a great question.
848
00:40:29,080 --> 00:40:33,000
And I think it's just, I don't
know, institutionalized sexism.
849
00:40:33,280 --> 00:40:34,880
Yeah, cuz.
Why is everything our fault?
850
00:40:34,880 --> 00:40:36,760
My God, I'm so tired of it.
Right.
851
00:40:36,760 --> 00:40:38,440
Like.
Apparently, they're the ones
852
00:40:38,480 --> 00:40:41,840
with the, you know, big tragedy
that's happening, The loneliness
853
00:40:41,960 --> 00:40:43,480
epidemic.
Yeah.
854
00:40:43,480 --> 00:40:45,160
When women are lonely at the
same rate.
855
00:40:45,200 --> 00:40:46,840
Yeah.
Be clear then.
856
00:40:46,840 --> 00:40:49,720
Second, you're right.
Like, it's portrayed as our
857
00:40:49,720 --> 00:40:51,880
fault, right?
They can't attract a woman
858
00:40:51,880 --> 00:40:55,000
because now we're too picky.
We're too educated, right?
859
00:40:55,000 --> 00:40:56,720
We're not willing to take care
of them.
860
00:40:57,160 --> 00:40:59,080
Right.
A lot of divorces are initiated
861
00:40:59,080 --> 00:41:00,240
by women.
Yeah.
862
00:41:00,360 --> 00:41:05,080
And somehow, like we are
responsible, apparently, for
863
00:41:05,080 --> 00:41:06,920
their emotional regulation.
Yeah.
864
00:41:07,800 --> 00:41:12,360
And you know, just thinking of
some not data sets, but personal
865
00:41:12,360 --> 00:41:18,000
anecdotes, yes, of, you know,
I'm thinking of my text friend
866
00:41:18,280 --> 00:41:21,200
in a text friend in particular.
Yes.
867
00:41:21,240 --> 00:41:22,800
Do we have a nickname for your
text friend?
868
00:41:23,360 --> 00:41:24,920
I think.
We should call him Mr.
869
00:41:24,920 --> 00:41:28,440
Clydesdale.
Mr. Clydesdale yes, I like it.
870
00:41:28,440 --> 00:41:29,840
Or.
Say it's the year of.
871
00:41:29,840 --> 00:41:32,360
The Fire Horse.
So it's the year of the fire
872
00:41:32,360 --> 00:41:33,120
horse.
Yes.
873
00:41:33,120 --> 00:41:36,040
You know, I'm, I feel like I
imprinted on the Budweiser
874
00:41:36,040 --> 00:41:38,640
Clydesdales in like my earlier
years.
875
00:41:38,640 --> 00:41:40,000
This actually makes me like him
more.
876
00:41:40,000 --> 00:41:41,920
I'm not sure if I like that.
Is this good?
877
00:41:42,120 --> 00:41:44,720
Well, you know, one thing that
we do know about each other is
878
00:41:44,720 --> 00:41:49,240
that we do enable each other and
we still haven't concluded if
879
00:41:49,240 --> 00:41:51,400
that is like a good thing or a
bad thing.
880
00:41:51,440 --> 00:41:54,160
Well, it's a.
Thing it's a thing and I like it
881
00:41:54,360 --> 00:41:56,360
cuz we.
Understand each other in a way
882
00:41:56,640 --> 00:42:00,240
that maybe some of our friends
don't understand us, right?
883
00:42:00,360 --> 00:42:04,680
That may question our choices,
choices and activities.
884
00:42:04,680 --> 00:42:05,960
Sanity.
But we.
885
00:42:06,360 --> 00:42:11,440
Understand on a deeper level and
you get me and we get our our
886
00:42:11,480 --> 00:42:15,840
relative situations OK.
So, Mr. Closedale, well, here's.
887
00:42:15,840 --> 00:42:18,480
The thing like, I just don't
understand, right?
888
00:42:18,920 --> 00:42:23,080
Like we have chemistry, which we
have both talked about like this
889
00:42:23,080 --> 00:42:25,200
isn't just me going, oh, we have
chemistry.
890
00:42:25,200 --> 00:42:29,840
Like he has verified that he
heals the chemistry.
891
00:42:29,840 --> 00:42:32,720
And in fact, recently we just
had a conversation where he was
892
00:42:32,720 --> 00:42:35,480
like, I, you know, I feel such
chemistry with you.
893
00:42:35,480 --> 00:42:40,520
And it's, it's it's so unusual
for that to happen, right?
894
00:42:40,520 --> 00:42:43,840
Like, it doesn't happen often,
which I would agree.
895
00:42:43,840 --> 00:42:45,760
You know, sometimes you just
meet a person and you're like,
896
00:42:45,760 --> 00:42:47,640
wee and, yeah, it just clicks
you.
897
00:42:47,920 --> 00:42:51,120
Or it could be your nervous
system completely dysregulated
898
00:42:51,120 --> 00:42:53,760
and indicating danger to you.
But either way, you have a
899
00:42:53,760 --> 00:42:55,320
feeling.
I know.
900
00:42:55,320 --> 00:42:58,120
Oh, I feel something spicy.
I'm not dead inside, Right.
901
00:42:58,840 --> 00:43:01,960
It's like, oh, my loinstereus.
My God.
902
00:43:01,960 --> 00:43:04,400
Yeah, I have a pulse.
It's a rare feeling.
903
00:43:04,400 --> 00:43:05,840
It is.
So I get it right.
904
00:43:05,840 --> 00:43:07,560
You want to lean into that and
so.
905
00:43:07,560 --> 00:43:11,440
That was my next this question.
I was like, OK, so you're having
906
00:43:11,440 --> 00:43:14,280
such a hard time, like setting
up a coffee date with me.
907
00:43:14,280 --> 00:43:16,360
I'm just like, what am I
missing?
908
00:43:17,160 --> 00:43:19,200
Like, what am I missing?
Why is this so hard?
909
00:43:19,440 --> 00:43:21,480
And of course, the obvious
answer could be he's
910
00:43:21,480 --> 00:43:25,440
bullshitting me.
And you know, it just enjoys
911
00:43:25,440 --> 00:43:29,160
whatever little dopamine hit our
little texting friendship gives
912
00:43:29,160 --> 00:43:32,840
him.
But you know, then I hear other
913
00:43:32,840 --> 00:43:37,440
things that are going on for him
and I'm like, wow, it's their
914
00:43:37,440 --> 00:43:38,320
connection.
Now.
915
00:43:38,320 --> 00:43:42,120
I am not sharing that he has
ever shared with me that he's
916
00:43:42,120 --> 00:43:45,960
lonely because he is not.
It's mostly a work issue.
917
00:43:45,960 --> 00:43:48,600
Oh, OK.
And I think it's interesting in
918
00:43:48,600 --> 00:43:53,360
the context of the male
loneliness epidemic because I
919
00:43:53,360 --> 00:43:58,200
think a lot of men lean on work
or can lean on work.
920
00:43:58,600 --> 00:44:03,240
And I understand that probably
thinking evolutionary, speaking
921
00:44:03,360 --> 00:44:04,760
evolutionarily.
What?
922
00:44:04,760 --> 00:44:06,640
What word am I trying to say?
Jesus, help me.
923
00:44:06,640 --> 00:44:08,120
I mean, now you're talking my
language.
924
00:44:08,120 --> 00:44:10,400
Yeah, evolutionarily, I did.
I give you a boner?
925
00:44:11,040 --> 00:44:14,440
Well, no.
Yes, that word.
926
00:44:14,760 --> 00:44:17,680
It's like, you know, I get that
they want to maybe even
927
00:44:17,680 --> 00:44:19,840
subconsciously be like, I am a
good provider.
928
00:44:19,840 --> 00:44:22,520
Look how busy I am.
Like, interesting.
929
00:44:22,520 --> 00:44:25,720
Yeah.
And I respect this man, what he
930
00:44:25,720 --> 00:44:28,520
does, very talented, blah, blah,
blah.
931
00:44:28,840 --> 00:44:31,880
But you know, Yeah, well, and it
is sexy for them to.
932
00:44:31,880 --> 00:44:34,920
Have something going on?
Well, yes, a job, right?
933
00:44:34,960 --> 00:44:36,520
Let's just start there.
No start.
934
00:44:36,560 --> 00:44:39,720
No homosexuals, no sexuals.
Yeah.
935
00:44:39,720 --> 00:44:41,480
I mean, Fermi has a car and a
home.
936
00:44:41,600 --> 00:44:42,240
Yeah.
Good.
937
00:44:42,240 --> 00:44:44,480
In fact, more than one.
So yeah, that's nice.
938
00:44:44,480 --> 00:44:45,440
Yeah, Very nice.
Yeah.
939
00:44:45,760 --> 00:44:48,640
And, and not just having a job,
but being good at what they do.
940
00:44:48,680 --> 00:44:50,880
Yes.
That's actually hot, really hot.
941
00:44:50,880 --> 00:44:52,360
And it doesn't matter what that
is.
942
00:44:52,360 --> 00:44:52,960
Yeah.
Or.
943
00:44:52,960 --> 00:44:55,800
Like and or like having some.
Ambition, right?
944
00:44:55,800 --> 00:44:58,240
Like sort of caring about, yeah,
what you're doing.
945
00:44:58,240 --> 00:45:00,480
Like this stuff, it's sexy.
It is.
946
00:45:00,640 --> 00:45:02,320
And like, they could be an
accountant.
947
00:45:02,680 --> 00:45:06,840
They could be a milkman, Yes,
they could be whatever.
948
00:45:07,400 --> 00:45:11,360
Do we even have milkman anymore?
Well, that's a good.
949
00:45:11,360 --> 00:45:14,240
Question and I think Winder
Dairy still delivers milk so
950
00:45:14,240 --> 00:45:17,120
maybe he could work for that
unless COVID till that I have no
951
00:45:17,120 --> 00:45:20,680
idea.
But regardless, it's it's hot.
952
00:45:20,840 --> 00:45:25,920
It is, but also we don't want
Mr. 9 to 5 dead behind the eyes.
953
00:45:26,000 --> 00:45:29,520
Yeah.
Because it's just like is really
954
00:45:29,520 --> 00:45:31,720
like your whole personhood, your
job.
955
00:45:32,320 --> 00:45:35,200
That's that's not hot.
That cuts Steve that.
956
00:45:35,280 --> 00:45:40,560
Yeah, Yeah.
So that's, that's where I'm at
957
00:45:40,560 --> 00:45:42,640
with that.
It's like, well, again, not that
958
00:45:42,640 --> 00:45:46,160
I'm saying he he has expressed
loneliness, but if the men are
959
00:45:46,160 --> 00:45:48,840
alone, is it really all our
fault?
960
00:45:48,840 --> 00:45:50,160
I don't think it is all our
fault.
961
00:45:50,160 --> 00:45:53,320
And it sounds to me.
Like Mr. Clydesdale does a thing
962
00:45:53,320 --> 00:45:56,760
that Mister Levin also likes to
do, which is, I don't know if
963
00:45:56,760 --> 00:45:58,800
this is the real name for it,
but like this rubber banding
964
00:45:58,800 --> 00:46:01,520
thing, right where you come
really close, right.
965
00:46:01,520 --> 00:46:03,320
Things are great.
Yeah.
966
00:46:04,960 --> 00:46:07,200
You're like, Oh no, girl, I it
was not close.
967
00:46:07,200 --> 00:46:09,200
It was.
Yeah, anyway, sorry, carry on.
968
00:46:09,200 --> 00:46:13,520
And then for whatever reason.
They like just fuck off.
969
00:46:13,520 --> 00:46:16,120
They're like goodbye.
And you're like, wait, yeah,
970
00:46:16,200 --> 00:46:18,240
what?
And and it's sometimes it could
971
00:46:18,240 --> 00:46:19,760
be different reasons, like who
knows?
972
00:46:19,760 --> 00:46:21,480
Did they feel a feeling and that
scared them?
973
00:46:21,720 --> 00:46:23,760
Yes.
You and I talked about that.
974
00:46:23,840 --> 00:46:28,600
Yeah, a lot in our own, like
different situations, right?
975
00:46:28,600 --> 00:46:30,920
Yeah.
Or did I feel a feeling?
976
00:46:30,920 --> 00:46:34,680
And I expressed it and it wasn't
100% positive and adoring of
977
00:46:34,680 --> 00:46:38,000
you.
So then suddenly now I'm too
978
00:46:38,000 --> 00:46:39,920
sensitive, right?
I'm too dramatic.
979
00:46:39,920 --> 00:46:43,280
I'm too negative because I dared
to voice that I had this feeling
980
00:46:43,480 --> 00:46:44,280
right.
Yeah.
981
00:46:44,440 --> 00:46:47,720
And I know you and I would.
Imagine that it came across in
982
00:46:48,280 --> 00:46:54,760
an articulate calm, like non
accusatory, just this is how I'm
983
00:46:54,760 --> 00:46:56,560
feeling kind of way.
Yeah.
984
00:46:56,600 --> 00:46:58,160
I mean, OK, you know me pretty
well.
985
00:46:58,160 --> 00:47:00,560
I do.
Would you or do you think anyone
986
00:47:00,560 --> 00:47:04,000
in our circle would describe me
as too sensitive or too
987
00:47:04,000 --> 00:47:05,920
dramatic?
Not at all.
988
00:47:06,080 --> 00:47:10,000
Yeah, because you're.
Actually very like you're to the
989
00:47:10,000 --> 00:47:11,880
point.
Like one thing I have always
990
00:47:11,880 --> 00:47:16,520
loved to bite you is that even
this week I was like, damn,
991
00:47:16,680 --> 00:47:18,640
she's amazing.
Where?
992
00:47:18,680 --> 00:47:19,920
Yes.
What did I do this week?
993
00:47:21,160 --> 00:47:23,360
Well.
We were in a situation.
994
00:47:23,360 --> 00:47:27,320
Of eating and it was expressed
that you could crawl on the
995
00:47:27,320 --> 00:47:31,120
floor to get to your seat that's
right I remember and you just.
996
00:47:31,120 --> 00:47:32,800
Said I'm absolutely not crawling
on the.
997
00:47:32,800 --> 00:47:37,280
Floor and I was like, like, I
just I just love that about you
998
00:47:37,280 --> 00:47:41,600
because you know you are not
you're just like you will say
999
00:47:41,600 --> 00:47:45,240
it.
You're not dramatic or you know,
1000
00:47:45,280 --> 00:47:47,400
you don't look for drama.
You're not.
1001
00:47:47,880 --> 00:47:49,840
No, I don't know what the word
is, but.
1002
00:47:49,840 --> 00:47:52,880
No, that is.
Absolutely not how anybody would
1003
00:47:52,880 --> 00:47:54,240
describe you that knows you
well.
1004
00:47:54,240 --> 00:47:56,080
Thanks for noticing because
you're amazing.
1005
00:47:56,240 --> 00:47:57,240
Thank you.
You are.
1006
00:47:57,480 --> 00:47:58,520
Yeah.
So I think there's.
1007
00:47:58,520 --> 00:48:02,440
That there's the phenomenon of,
well, I mean, this is almost
1008
00:48:02,440 --> 00:48:04,520
like a meme.
I think it is a meme, actually,
1009
00:48:04,520 --> 00:48:06,360
right?
Where men are like, well, yeah,
1010
00:48:06,360 --> 00:48:09,800
I did something shitty, but you
called me out on it.
1011
00:48:09,800 --> 00:48:12,400
So I'm the real victim here,
right?
1012
00:48:13,280 --> 00:48:15,160
There's pattern.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
1013
00:48:15,840 --> 00:48:17,920
What was that news?
Story we saw this week where
1014
00:48:17,920 --> 00:48:20,400
they.
Blamed like some woman for like
1015
00:48:20,400 --> 00:48:23,840
hundreds of years on something
and then they look into it and
1016
00:48:23,840 --> 00:48:25,760
they were like, oh, actually
that wasn't her fault.
1017
00:48:26,040 --> 00:48:29,880
Oh, right, that was it's.
Like a Chinese dynasty year or
1018
00:48:29,880 --> 00:48:33,160
something.
Yeah, it's it's just like, yeah,
1019
00:48:33,160 --> 00:48:36,840
to look it up and get back to
you friends, but that just that
1020
00:48:36,840 --> 00:48:41,920
idea that that's like the go to
like where why let's scapegoat a
1021
00:48:41,920 --> 00:48:43,600
woman instead of like the
massive.
1022
00:48:43,600 --> 00:48:46,480
Environmental destruction that
like tanked our civilization.
1023
00:48:46,560 --> 00:48:48,680
Yes.
And you know, I did.
1024
00:48:48,680 --> 00:48:52,640
Have an experience like that
with Mr. Clydesdale this week
1025
00:48:52,640 --> 00:48:55,320
because we were coffee was going
to happen.
1026
00:48:55,560 --> 00:48:57,480
Oh my God, it was like going to
happen.
1027
00:48:57,480 --> 00:49:00,840
Finally going to perform.
Yes, I feel like, Oh my God, I
1028
00:49:00,840 --> 00:49:04,960
got I'm going to get 45 minutes
of your time and I received a
1029
00:49:04,960 --> 00:49:10,800
text that was like, hey, so on
day off, like we'd we'd a vague
1030
00:49:10,800 --> 00:49:15,200
time, like map tight.
And he said I'm just like so
1031
00:49:15,200 --> 00:49:19,240
busy, but I'm at this particular
coffee shop and like, if you
1032
00:49:19,240 --> 00:49:23,000
wanted, you could stop by or
maybe just next week instead.
1033
00:49:23,080 --> 00:49:25,360
Oh my God, that was not hot
that.
1034
00:49:25,800 --> 00:49:29,640
OK, so he's like, I'm so busy.
Yeah.
1035
00:49:29,640 --> 00:49:32,680
And first of all, he's saying
that to you, the busiest person
1036
00:49:32,680 --> 00:49:35,200
I know in my whole fucking life.
OK.
1037
00:49:35,240 --> 00:49:37,040
But you know, it shouldn't be a
badge of honor.
1038
00:49:37,320 --> 00:49:40,280
Well, you know, sure, sure, but
also like it's.
1039
00:49:40,960 --> 00:49:43,640
I don't know, kind of naive.
It sounds like he doesn't know
1040
00:49:43,640 --> 00:49:46,880
what's going on in your life,
which is what I actually pointed
1041
00:49:46,880 --> 00:49:49,320
out to.
Him in that moment so like I was
1042
00:49:49,320 --> 00:49:51,520
already I, I was at work and I
bought a little change of
1043
00:49:51,520 --> 00:49:55,200
clothes and like, I was so
excited and, and, you know, I
1044
00:49:55,200 --> 00:49:57,680
said to him, I just have a crush
on you and I wanted to get
1045
00:49:57,680 --> 00:50:02,600
coffee and that was surprising
to him what he was like, oh,
1046
00:50:02,600 --> 00:50:03,680
that's so.
Cute.
1047
00:50:03,720 --> 00:50:06,200
And I was like.
Well, what else did you think it
1048
00:50:06,200 --> 00:50:08,560
was?
Like I, I don't understand.
1049
00:50:08,960 --> 00:50:14,280
But I did bring up the point
that, you know, I you keep
1050
00:50:14,280 --> 00:50:17,800
telling me this, but like, you
don't ask when I'm free or where
1051
00:50:17,800 --> 00:50:21,600
I would like to go or, you know,
could it be a little bit more
1052
00:50:21,600 --> 00:50:24,080
elaborative?
Yeah, he's like, I'm super busy.
1053
00:50:24,080 --> 00:50:26,320
So I'm at this coffee shop.
I guess you could come by if you
1054
00:50:26,360 --> 00:50:28,960
want and watch, watch me work.
I mean, I don't really care if.
1055
00:50:28,960 --> 00:50:31,680
You do or not?
Whatever if you want to come by
1056
00:50:31,680 --> 00:50:33,840
then.
Like fine I feel so I guess.
1057
00:50:34,520 --> 00:50:37,520
You can sit there and watch me.
Work for a few minutes I might
1058
00:50:37,520 --> 00:50:40,720
take a call well what a what an
invitation, right.
1059
00:50:40,800 --> 00:50:46,520
I felt so wanted so cherished
that moment challenged desired
1060
00:50:46,600 --> 00:50:50,360
yeah all all of the things so I
I give him a quiz I was like
1061
00:50:50,360 --> 00:50:53,560
what what do you know about me
like what do you know about me
1062
00:50:53,880 --> 00:50:57,400
and again I.
He said that I was too intense.
1063
00:50:57,400 --> 00:50:59,760
It was the intensity that he
couldn't take.
1064
00:50:59,760 --> 00:51:03,720
Oh my God, you are not I'm.
A wee bit mental like, well,
1065
00:51:03,720 --> 00:51:05,920
give me.
That but like I'm well, you're
1066
00:51:05,920 --> 00:51:07,640
not mental like there's some
chaos from.
1067
00:51:07,640 --> 00:51:10,080
Time to time, but like, I
wouldn't.
1068
00:51:10,080 --> 00:51:12,920
Hopefully it's endearing.
Intense would never be a word I
1069
00:51:13,120 --> 00:51:15,600
would come.
Up with and I have certainly not
1070
00:51:15,600 --> 00:51:17,760
been intense.
With this man we're texting
1071
00:51:17,760 --> 00:51:19,640
friends so you.
Have it.
1072
00:51:19,640 --> 00:51:22,080
That's it.
It's like very superficial.
1073
00:51:22,360 --> 00:51:27,480
But yeah, he was, he was quite
irritated, shall we say, and I
1074
00:51:27,480 --> 00:51:30,760
had to point out that he he
could not help but talk over me.
1075
00:51:31,240 --> 00:51:34,560
Another thing that we have
experienced one too many times.
1076
00:51:34,600 --> 00:51:36,440
I really don't like that.
I don't either.
1077
00:51:36,640 --> 00:51:38,000
But I.
Will give him his his.
1078
00:51:38,080 --> 00:51:43,920
His his Jews, Druze something.
We'll give him some snaps.
1079
00:51:43,920 --> 00:51:46,640
I was going.
To say, but that's not the right
1080
00:51:46,640 --> 00:51:48,880
word.
And it came out like that, so
1081
00:51:48,880 --> 00:51:51,280
yes.
He he, he was responsive, he
1082
00:51:51,280 --> 00:51:54,960
listened and he really did try
like to not talk.
1083
00:51:55,640 --> 00:52:00,440
I could tell it took a long that
was a real big ask.
1084
00:52:00,480 --> 00:52:04,360
But he he really did try.
And and he called me back later
1085
00:52:04,360 --> 00:52:07,760
that day and asked me questions.
Oh, OK, yeah.
1086
00:52:08,000 --> 00:52:12,720
So he was somehow unaware that
he had asked no questions and
1087
00:52:12,720 --> 00:52:16,880
that this might be a thing that
humans do with one another in a
1088
00:52:16,880 --> 00:52:18,400
relationship, regardless of the
type.
1089
00:52:18,520 --> 00:52:20,600
Yeah, he realized that after
meeting me.
1090
00:52:20,600 --> 00:52:22,800
One year ago, he did not still
know my last name.
1091
00:52:26,280 --> 00:52:28,400
It's so it's amazing.
Yeah.
1092
00:52:28,480 --> 00:52:30,480
Bringing.
It back to why the men might be
1093
00:52:30,480 --> 00:52:33,560
lonely, I mean.
Oh yeah, I just.
1094
00:52:33,840 --> 00:52:37,200
Yeah.
It's it's just very interesting
1095
00:52:37,200 --> 00:52:39,960
because they sometimes feel like
even just with the interactions
1096
00:52:39,960 --> 00:52:43,880
and dating apps, you're like,
well, if you're feeling lonely,
1097
00:52:43,880 --> 00:52:49,880
this there may not be be
behaviours associated with, you
1098
00:52:49,880 --> 00:52:52,960
know, trying to fix that.
Yeah, maybe you don't write a
1099
00:52:52,960 --> 00:52:54,000
bio.
That's super.
1100
00:52:54,040 --> 00:52:56,560
Angry and it's like putting
women down.
1101
00:52:56,960 --> 00:53:01,320
Maybe step 11 O one, Yeah, I
would take that so.
1102
00:53:01,560 --> 00:53:03,800
How do we solve the male
loneliness epidemic?
1103
00:53:03,800 --> 00:53:06,520
Male.
I don't know, I think.
1104
00:53:06,520 --> 00:53:08,080
They have to solve it
themselves.
1105
00:53:08,640 --> 00:53:13,000
Yes, maybe some hobbies.
Yeah, some friends, right?
1106
00:53:13,000 --> 00:53:17,120
Like lean into your friends and
if you don't have any friends go
1107
00:53:17,120 --> 00:53:19,440
make some.
Yeah, like get a wee book group
1108
00:53:19,440 --> 00:53:22,800
or something.
Yeah, something I don't know,
1109
00:53:22,800 --> 00:53:26,120
Watch some sports together.
Yeah, like growl together.
1110
00:53:28,240 --> 00:53:31,160
Touchdown right like watch a
game and.
1111
00:53:31,160 --> 00:53:33,760
Then, like, ask one question
about your friend's life.
1112
00:53:33,760 --> 00:53:35,680
You could practice.
Practice, Yeah.
1113
00:53:35,680 --> 00:53:38,840
And you could say to your.
Friend, like do you have this
1114
00:53:38,840 --> 00:53:42,440
issue and not asking questions
like maybe we could practice
1115
00:53:42,440 --> 00:53:45,520
together?
Yeah, I can't envisage any man
1116
00:53:45,520 --> 00:53:48,000
ever having that conversation,
but did I send?
1117
00:53:48,000 --> 00:53:50,640
You this little thing I saw on
Instagram, I can't remember now
1118
00:53:50,640 --> 00:53:53,800
because we send each other so
many things, but it was like
1119
00:53:53,800 --> 00:53:56,600
some guy on Twitter or X
whatever.
1120
00:53:56,600 --> 00:53:59,240
I don't want to use X Twitter.
It's called Yeah, being like,
1121
00:53:59,240 --> 00:54:02,520
well, how come women have
Galentine's Day and men don't
1122
00:54:02,520 --> 00:54:05,120
have anything?
And like some woman responds,
1123
00:54:05,120 --> 00:54:07,600
she's like, oh, I'm sorry, did
you want us to organize a little
1124
00:54:07,600 --> 00:54:11,520
thing for you?
Oh my God.
1125
00:54:12,600 --> 00:54:14,640
Like, yeah, right.
Where is it?
1126
00:54:14,640 --> 00:54:18,440
It didn't magically appear.
Someone didn't plan it for me.
1127
00:54:18,760 --> 00:54:20,480
Oh.
My God.
1128
00:54:21,640 --> 00:54:25,920
Wow, if only there was a.
Way for them to plan that and do
1129
00:54:25,920 --> 00:54:28,520
it with their friends.
If only yes.
1130
00:54:28,920 --> 00:54:34,680
Oh yeah, and it it ties back to
our little dead fish episode 2.
1131
00:54:34,680 --> 00:54:37,920
Right?
Like, the reason why a lot of
1132
00:54:37,920 --> 00:54:41,280
men only have that picture is
it's because it's like, one of
1133
00:54:41,280 --> 00:54:43,280
the only things where another
person is present.
1134
00:54:43,480 --> 00:54:45,920
Yeah.
Which makes me, like, sad,
1135
00:54:46,240 --> 00:54:48,440
definitely.
Like I'm sad for them.
1136
00:54:48,840 --> 00:54:54,440
And.
Also like maybe do do.
1137
00:54:54,440 --> 00:54:57,760
Something in your power do.
Something, damn it.
1138
00:54:57,960 --> 00:55:01,080
Yeah.
I mean, you moved back to Utah
1139
00:55:01,400 --> 00:55:05,240
from California.
I moved here from another land.
1140
00:55:05,360 --> 00:55:07,120
We find each other.
We did.
1141
00:55:07,320 --> 00:55:09,440
We find friends and meaning.
Yeah.
1142
00:55:09,440 --> 00:55:11,240
And sometimes it takes a minute.
Yeah, it.
1143
00:55:11,240 --> 00:55:14,040
Can be hard.
It can be hard at our age, yes,
1144
00:55:14,040 --> 00:55:16,200
but it's not impossible.
It is.
1145
00:55:16,280 --> 00:55:18,560
There's even the option on the
apps for making.
1146
00:55:18,560 --> 00:55:19,840
Friends.
Sure, yeah.
1147
00:55:19,840 --> 00:55:21,800
Or there's like, meet up groups,
Yeah, you know.
1148
00:55:21,800 --> 00:55:25,160
There's bars and places in the
city that host events every
1149
00:55:25,160 --> 00:55:27,040
night of the week.
You don't even have to drink
1150
00:55:27,080 --> 00:55:28,640
right?
If you're sober that's fine.
1151
00:55:28,640 --> 00:55:32,880
Just go and like have a mocktail
or a non alcoholic beer and like
1152
00:55:33,080 --> 00:55:35,640
try to meet someone or hiking
groups.
1153
00:55:35,640 --> 00:55:38,480
My God, we're in Utah.
They're like 10 million hiking
1154
00:55:38,480 --> 00:55:39,720
groups.
Oh my God, there's so many.
1155
00:55:40,600 --> 00:55:43,080
So people are out there.
Yeah, you can find them.
1156
00:55:43,280 --> 00:55:45,000
I believe in you.
Have you?
1157
00:55:45,400 --> 00:55:49,520
Have you ever dated?
A person that didn't really have
1158
00:55:49,640 --> 00:55:51,480
like a lot of those connections.
Yes.
1159
00:55:51,920 --> 00:55:54,360
Yeah, that was very sweet
answer.
1160
00:55:55,800 --> 00:55:59,040
Yeah, I feel like a lot of.
Men don't some do have close
1161
00:55:59,040 --> 00:56:02,480
friends that they've held onto
for a long time and others don't
1162
00:56:02,480 --> 00:56:05,600
like they've had friends before.
But then situations change and
1163
00:56:05,600 --> 00:56:07,480
those friends go out of their
lives and they don't make new
1164
00:56:07,480 --> 00:56:10,360
ones.
And and it's a problem because
1165
00:56:10,360 --> 00:56:14,040
when the responsibility of being
the entire support network is on
1166
00:56:14,040 --> 00:56:18,240
you, then it's heavy.
It feels like a lot and it's
1167
00:56:18,320 --> 00:56:21,000
it's a lot on the.
Relationship and it's kind of
1168
00:56:21,400 --> 00:56:25,320
funny to me also because I think
a frequent thing you get from
1169
00:56:25,320 --> 00:56:27,240
men is like, I want to keep my
independence.
1170
00:56:27,240 --> 00:56:30,640
I want to, but like, they don't
do anything and you're like,
1171
00:56:30,840 --> 00:56:33,240
bro, I'm all about that.
Go out with your friends.
1172
00:56:33,240 --> 00:56:35,160
Absolutely.
I have my things to do.
1173
00:56:35,160 --> 00:56:39,360
But then a lot of times you also
carry the relationship socially.
1174
00:56:39,840 --> 00:56:41,600
That's right.
Because it's like, well, you
1175
00:56:41,600 --> 00:56:44,280
know my friends, but.
But where are your friends?
1176
00:56:44,520 --> 00:56:48,280
Yeah, yeah, that's fair.
Some pretty universal
1177
00:56:48,280 --> 00:56:50,760
experiences, I would say.
Yeah, I think so.
1178
00:56:53,080 --> 00:56:55,520
We're sorry that you're lonely.
If you are.
1179
00:56:55,520 --> 00:56:57,120
Some of you are not.
Yes, some of you have.
1180
00:56:57,400 --> 00:57:00,000
Wonderful partners and or social
networks.
1181
00:57:00,000 --> 00:57:02,800
So we wanna acknowledge that
once again, hashtag not all men.
1182
00:57:02,920 --> 00:57:05,080
Hashtag not all men, but enough
men.
1183
00:57:05,520 --> 00:57:07,280
That this.
Is in the news all the time.
1184
00:57:07,360 --> 00:57:08,760
Yeah.
I feel like every other day I
1185
00:57:08,760 --> 00:57:11,360
see another article about the
male loneliness epidemic.
1186
00:57:11,360 --> 00:57:16,800
Yeah, Which yeah, like.
I have never once heard a female
1187
00:57:16,800 --> 00:57:20,880
loneliness epidemic Yeah, and
yet never that study women are
1188
00:57:20,880 --> 00:57:23,240
lonely at the.
Same rates as men, yeah.
1189
00:57:23,680 --> 00:57:28,040
And I have to say like.
Again, generalizations, but in
1190
00:57:28,040 --> 00:57:31,880
the event of a divorce or you
know, where their share custody
1191
00:57:31,880 --> 00:57:36,480
of children, it has been my
experience that women are taking
1192
00:57:36,480 --> 00:57:39,480
on most of that sort of
day-to-day care, right.
1193
00:57:39,480 --> 00:57:43,520
And you know, again, hashtag not
all men, but like a a pretty
1194
00:57:43,520 --> 00:57:47,160
good a mind.
Just anecdotally from from
1195
00:57:47,160 --> 00:57:50,440
friends and people I know and
like, I know you feel this.
1196
00:57:50,440 --> 00:57:53,600
Our children are getting older,
but like some days require
1197
00:57:53,600 --> 00:57:59,400
Herculean efforts, like
Herculean efforts with work and
1198
00:57:59,400 --> 00:58:03,680
kids and stuff and
responsibilities and cleaning
1199
00:58:03,680 --> 00:58:06,560
and groceries that, you know,
it's like a lot.
1200
00:58:06,600 --> 00:58:10,680
It's a lot.
And yet we find time for
1201
00:58:10,880 --> 00:58:15,320
relationships or men, men in our
lives or, you know, whatever
1202
00:58:15,320 --> 00:58:17,640
that might look like.
And also that can be a really
1203
00:58:17,800 --> 00:58:20,720
lonely space.
It can be when you're carrying a
1204
00:58:20,720 --> 00:58:21,440
lot of that.
That.
1205
00:58:21,440 --> 00:58:24,800
Can be very lonely and it can be
lonely whether you're single or
1206
00:58:24,800 --> 00:58:26,880
whether you're.
Coupled actually you can be very
1207
00:58:26,880 --> 00:58:30,880
lonely in your marriage taking
all of these things on and and
1208
00:58:30,880 --> 00:58:34,760
it's often in many relationships
not acknowledged it's not
1209
00:58:34,760 --> 00:58:38,200
appreciated right yeah like you
know you're not doing the real
1210
00:58:38,200 --> 00:58:40,720
work quote UN quote yeah because
you're not doing the the
1211
00:58:40,720 --> 00:58:43,640
compensated work or you probably
are doing the compensated work
1212
00:58:43,640 --> 00:58:48,200
then you're also doing all this
other stuff which isn't really
1213
00:58:48,200 --> 00:58:50,880
appreciated for how much time it
takes and how much effort it
1214
00:58:50,880 --> 00:58:53,440
takes well and the mental load
right because it's.
1215
00:58:53,440 --> 00:58:57,080
That invisible work exactly
where you are always keeping.
1216
00:58:57,120 --> 00:58:59,640
A running.
Checklist of everything that
1217
00:58:59,640 --> 00:59:01,840
needs to be attention.
Attitude in your wee noggin.
1218
00:59:02,160 --> 00:59:05,320
And you know, sometimes the
men's will say, well, just tell
1219
00:59:05,320 --> 00:59:06,320
me.
And you're like, but that's
1220
00:59:06,320 --> 00:59:08,120
another step.
Just make me a list.
1221
00:59:08,120 --> 00:59:10,400
You're like, Oh my God, it's.
Faster to do it myself.
1222
00:59:10,400 --> 00:59:13,320
Yeah, you're like, but why can't
you use your eyes and your?
1223
00:59:13,320 --> 00:59:16,120
Brain.
And I know like.
1224
00:59:16,640 --> 00:59:18,760
I'm prone to tangents.
But I think all of these.
1225
00:59:18,760 --> 00:59:20,680
Things are related.
I think they are too.
1226
00:59:20,800 --> 00:59:22,720
You know, like whether.
Again, you're married.
1227
00:59:22,720 --> 00:59:26,880
Single in a relationship,
whatever that looks like.
1228
00:59:26,880 --> 00:59:29,200
I think they're all correlated
to this.
1229
00:59:29,200 --> 00:59:33,840
Then, you know, feeling of like
for a man, like I'm lonely and
1230
00:59:34,120 --> 00:59:36,080
it's a big problem and it's not
my fault.
1231
00:59:36,080 --> 00:59:38,720
Why is this happening?
Yeah, You know, Yeah, I think
1232
00:59:38,720 --> 00:59:40,120
that's right.
So to sum up.
1233
00:59:40,720 --> 00:59:44,240
Just this idea that men's
loneliness is a bigger problem
1234
00:59:44,280 --> 00:59:47,200
than women's loneliness, is it?
That's kind of rough.
1235
00:59:47,200 --> 00:59:49,480
I don't like it.
I it doesn't feel good, no.
1236
00:59:49,680 --> 00:59:52,440
Or that it's like so much
sadder.
1237
00:59:52,600 --> 00:59:54,160
Yeah, that's right.
It's so much more.
1238
00:59:54,160 --> 00:59:55,760
Tragic.
So tragic.
1239
00:59:56,360 --> 00:59:58,000
These women are terrible.
They don't.
1240
00:59:58,000 --> 01:00:00,640
Want me anymore?
Yeah yeah.
1241
01:00:01,360 --> 01:00:03,560
Well, we're running short of
time, so I feel like let's.
1242
01:00:03,560 --> 01:00:05,440
Wrap this up.
But I also feel like there's a
1243
01:00:05,440 --> 01:00:08,040
lot here and we should probably
address this in one or two
1244
01:00:08,040 --> 01:00:09,720
future episodes.
What do you think?
1245
01:00:09,840 --> 01:00:15,280
I think so because.
There's a like a lot of facets
1246
01:00:15,280 --> 01:00:19,440
to this right to like, why is
this loneliness happening?
1247
01:00:19,440 --> 01:00:24,680
You know, cuz women have changed
and evolved and you know, we
1248
01:00:24,680 --> 01:00:27,360
didn't have the best of
circumstances historically
1249
01:00:27,360 --> 01:00:29,440
speaking.
And you mean back when we were
1250
01:00:29,440 --> 01:00:32,320
property just?
Just, you know, a little bit
1251
01:00:32,320 --> 01:00:35,080
back then I.
Mean we can't forget that, you
1252
01:00:35,080 --> 01:00:37,560
know, and I'm a few years older
than you.
1253
01:00:37,560 --> 01:00:40,840
Like I couldn't own a home when
I was born, right?
1254
01:00:40,840 --> 01:00:43,600
You know, technically, yeah,
Probably have a credit card.
1255
01:00:43,600 --> 01:00:44,960
I don't.
Remember when that changed?
1256
01:00:44,960 --> 01:00:48,640
But I think it was the 70s.
It was I like I'm old, but not
1257
01:00:48,640 --> 01:00:51,400
that old, right?
So, so yeah, memory, I think a
1258
01:00:51,400 --> 01:00:53,200
few more episodes.
And let us know.
1259
01:00:53,200 --> 01:00:55,960
Let us know what part you would
like us to really dive into.
1260
01:00:56,000 --> 01:00:57,920
Yeah, friends.
So just to bring it full circle.
1261
01:00:57,920 --> 01:00:59,560
Please let us know in the
comments.
1262
01:00:59,560 --> 01:01:01,200
What do you think?
Do you want to hear more about
1263
01:01:01,200 --> 01:01:02,760
this?
Do you have any ideas?
1264
01:01:02,760 --> 01:01:04,720
Any comments on the male
loneliness epidemic?
1265
01:01:04,720 --> 01:01:07,600
We would love to hear them and
if we get those comments we will
1266
01:01:07,600 --> 01:01:09,120
address them in a future
episode.
1267
01:01:09,320 --> 01:01:11,360
And Salty Bros, tell us how
you're feeling.
1268
01:01:11,440 --> 01:01:15,360
Salty Bros, We want to hear from
everybody in yes, weigh in.
1269
01:01:15,360 --> 01:01:17,640
Tell us what it's really like.
I love that.
1270
01:01:18,120 --> 01:01:19,200
All right, Claire.
Well.
1271
01:01:19,560 --> 01:01:21,160
Should we sign off?
We will sign off.
1272
01:01:21,160 --> 01:01:22,640
My my.
Lovely friend.
1273
01:01:22,880 --> 01:01:25,240
Okay, salty bro, salty hoes
everywhere.
1274
01:01:25,640 --> 01:01:27,120
Keep it real.
Keep it real.
1275
01:01:27,120 --> 01:01:29,080
We'll be back at you next time.
Take care.
1276
01:01:29,240 --> 01:01:30,760
See you soon.
Bye.