A Very Salty Valentine

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Welcome back, we're coming at
you with another wee salty bite

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from the more morador, but more.
I love it.

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I always going to say the
Morador corridor, which is.

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Oh, that's even better.
The Morador corridor.

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Do you like that?
I love it.

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OK.
Oh, Morador Corridor.

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Totally intentional on my part.
I am Claire.

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I'm Mel.
And together we are the salty

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hose.
So it's a special holiday this

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week, Mel.
What holiday?

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Is it Oh my favorite holiday of
all time, the Super Bowl?

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Oh, that one, that's.
Not what you meant.

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Oh, we just had that.
OK.

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No, I'm sorry.
You're talking about Valentine's

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Day, aren't you?
I know how much you love the

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Super.
Bowl Well, it is the best

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American holiday.
Yeah, you do like that one.

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Actually I think the Monday, the
day following should be a

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holiday because everyone is
hungover as fuck.

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That's very true.
There's right not a lot of

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productivity happen happening,
particularly if your team lost

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like because you would be sad
too.

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Yeah, well, or if your team won,
you're celebrating.

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That's true.
So I.

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Know it's bad.
I have a proposal.

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Let's get rid of Thanksgiving
and make the Super Bowl Monday a

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holiday.
What do you think?

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I go merka, yes.
I mean, come on, Thanksgiving,

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we don't need that anymore.
I don't like it anyway.

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You know that is fair because as
a person that did not grow up

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celebrating Thanksgiving, I am
always like why are there 2 like

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massive holidays so close
together?

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Yeah, and it's kind of
problematic, but anyway, that's.

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Apart from that, yeah, I mean,
yes, like why are we celebrating

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the rape and murder of
Indigenous people?

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There is that aspect.
There is that, but that's not

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what we're talking about today
is.

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It no, but look at us sometimes
today.

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Well, maybe that was some good
like foreshadowing.

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Yeah, there we go.
All right.

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Well, let's talk about
Valentine's.

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Yeah.
Do you have a Valentine this

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year?
I do not have a Valentine this

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year.
It's very sad.

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So I guess I can just catch
everyone up on my dating life or

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lack thereof.
Yes, How I So I think maybe by

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now you've heard a couple of
episodes mentioning Mr. High

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Rise that is no longer a thing.
And it's probably worth

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mentioning that we don't always
release these in the order that

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we record them.
This is very true because

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sometimes we're struck by
inspiration or we're like, Oh my

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God, it's a holiday.
We are Sundance.

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Like we had to mark the
occasion.

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Absolutely.
We had to sneak one in there.

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So some of the episodes that you
hear we've recorded, you know, a

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week or two beforehand, and some
are hot off the press.

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Yeah, there's some that we
record and then we push out the

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next day.
The timeline's a little wonky,

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y'all.
So you may hear one more episode

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mentioning Mr. High Rise.
Mr. High Rise is no longer a

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thing.
Mr. High Rise went off the deep

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end.
What happened?

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It was going so good.
I thought it was too like we,

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you know, we hung out on a
Friday, everything was fine and

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then we were supposed to get
together on Sunday.

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Didn't hear anything. 2 days.
Yeah, two days.

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Oh my God.
A whole 2 days.

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Yeah, well, except for on
Sunday.

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No text.
No text, no text.

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Like I was doing my thing,
working out, doing my errands.

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And finally I was like, hey, I
thought we were going to get

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together.
And he had like, kind of a

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meltdown over the course of
several days.

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He was like, well, I'm really
sick.

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Like I'm shaking.
I have 103° fever.

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And I was like, do you want me
to come drive you to the ER?

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Right, like.
That sounds serious.

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It sounds very serious and I'm
very sensitive because I did

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have a sepsis incident which we
can talk about another time.

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Well, we.
Definitely need to talk about

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that.
Yeah, it was real bad.

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But anyway, so like, it worries
me, of course.

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And he was like, no, I'm fine,
fine.

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Next day, nothing.
I finally texted, Are you OK?

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Yeah.
I'm still shaking.

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I still have a really high
fever.

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I can't get out of bed.
I'm like, can I come drive you

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to the ER?
Right, because this has been

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days night.
Yeah, no, nothing.

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Next day, I'm like, are you
alive?

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What's happening?
Right.

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And then there is this string of
bizarre, vague texts talking

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about friends from back home and
friends here in Utah and his

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mother and how it's really hard
to go to the gym two days a week

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and what?
Yeah, it was.

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What the weirdest?
I know I'm like, is this a drug

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relapse?
Are we flipping between manic

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and like?
I don't understand what was

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happening.
Like what is going on?

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Yeah, wow.
And then at the end, like there

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really was no clarity.
I was just, I just sort of

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stopped responding because it
was bizarre.

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God, I am so sorry.
Why did why does this happen?

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I am sure people are listening
that are like, yeah.

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Sounds familiar?
Yeah.

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Yeah, like that like slow fade
or and also just like what

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happened because your last year
was so good.

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It was totally good.
Nothing happened.

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Nothing weird happened.
Right.

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And so like totally get that
sometimes we're just not feeling

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it or maybe somebody from the
past pops up or or yeah, maybe

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we're going through a thing
just.

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Communicate, but just tell me,
right?

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Yeah, don't start Like, is the
fever even real?

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Yeah, who knows, right?
Like just something short and

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sweet.
You could just end it.

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You don't need.
People.

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You know 20 texts of verbal
diarrhea that I don't

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understand, right?
That's so.

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Weird.
Yeah, Anyway, so so that's.

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But actually now I can reveal
the other reason that his name

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was Mr. High Rise.
Oh yeah, go ahead.

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Well, he lied about his height.
Oh.

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He was one of those.
What did he say he was?

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He put 5/9 and.
What was he?

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Well, he told me that he had
lied by an inch and he was 58,

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but he was my height or even a
little shorter, so he lied by at

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least two inches.
Well, I'm glad I didn't swipe on

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him because I would have been.
Towering over, towering over.

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Him.
Yes.

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Oh my.
God.

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All right, well, enough about my
situation.

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What do you have going on?
Oh, my God.

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Any Valentine's.
You know, no, I am Valentine

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less for the, honestly, the
third year in a row because,

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yeah, that's another story of
the Valentine's three years ago,

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I guess.
But yes, I am with Ida

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Valentine.
Like not even a prospect of a

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Valentine.
Not a potential Valentine

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looming on the horizon.
No, there has been, there is

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there is no Valentine.
The only sort of like semi

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prospect that is not even a
prospect has been my texting

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friend.
You know about my texting?

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Friend, I do, yes.
Yeah.

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So this is a person that I had,
again kind of similar to your

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situation.
We had a couple of deets.

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We never had sex, but fun, like,
just fun.

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Yeah.
And really good banter over

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tech.
Like this person sent me like

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3000 texts or something on the
space of a month.

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Like just banter, like, you
know, And then it just.

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Fizzled.
It just stopped like abruptly.

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Well, like your situation with
Mr. High Rise and you're just

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like, OK, that what?
And then I reached I after a

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full year, oh wow, no contact a
full year.

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And then he was the one that was
like, oh, if you want to text me

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later, that's OK.
And I just said same because I

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didn't want to be texting him
back.

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And so he followed up and again
we've been texting for like a

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month but he does not want to
see me in real life.

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Oh my God.
So that's that's my situation.

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Yeah, we were.
He talked about coffee.

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But then when it came down to
it, he was very.

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Couldn't perform.
Couldn't perform.

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Couldn't perform the coffee and
I was like, OK, bro.

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And I was proud of myself
because before I, you know, I

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would have been like, oh, butt,
butt, butt, butt.

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And I was just like, I cannot
keep pouring energy into a text

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buddy.
Yeah, you get tired of chasing

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sometimes.
You really do.

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And it is chasing.
Well, it is, yeah.

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Yeah.
So.

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Especially someone who's kind of
made it clear that you're not

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really a priority.
Exactly.

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Cuz like, how can you be?
We're all busy.

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We're so busy.
Of course.

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And actually I text him.
I'm so glad you mentioned it

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that Alex.
Why do I always forget his last?

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Name Alex Honnold.
Thank you, I text him that

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picture.
I was like.

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Bro the picture of him texting
his wife from the top of Taipei

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one O 1 after he free soloed the
entire skyscraper.

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Yes, it's like we make time for
the things we want to make time.

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For that's right, if he wanted
to.

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He would, right?
I just don't get that

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psychology.
Why have a text friend?

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Like I don't get it.
What?

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Purpose.
Does it serve?

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I don't know, maybe it's a
little low effort dopamine hit.

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I know dude, just watch porn and
text your friend.

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I don't know.
But.

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You know what I mean?
It's like, why?

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I don't.
Yeah, I don't get that.

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So.
Yeah, that's weird.

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Have you?
Have you had good Valentine's?

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Given that neither of us are
have a little Valentine's this

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year?
Have you had a history of good

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Valentine's?
No, not exactly.

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I mean, I was married for a long
time, and maybe there were a

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couple times we did something
for Valentine's, but I feel like

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all the vast majority of the
years it wasn't really a thing.

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I didn't get a gift or flowers
or go out to dinner, Which

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actually that part is fine
because I don't like going out

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to dinner on Valentine's Day.
It's too busy.

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It's crowded.
You're going to get bad service,

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likely cold food.
Yeah.

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Yeah.
So it's not fun.

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I know that's not fun, so
whatever on that.

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But, you know, I feel like once
you've been with someone for a

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while, sometimes the holidays
are a little bit.

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Yeah, you know, Yeah.
So whatever, not a big deal.

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How about you?
Have you had good Valentine's in

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the past?
I mean, you're like, that would

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be a no.
Well, when I, when I was dating

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my husband and we were in
different countries, he was here

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and I was in Ireland, he just
sent me like a lovely little

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frog card because I love frogs
at the time.

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How cute.
But then we got married and

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nothing happened.
Yeah.

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And I was like, oh, like, what
can we do?

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Valentine's like.
And he was like, it is a

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capitalist holiday and like, you
know why?

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I agree with some of the
sentiments.

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It's like but it's just fun.
But they're all capitalist

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holidays.
I mean Christmas, Easter, like

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everything it all.
Exists to sell you things.

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Just buy me some flowers down
right and stop over analyzing.

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Right, right.
Or another way to say it is

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these holidays could have the
meaning that you give them,

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right?
Yeah, write me a note.

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00:10:36,040 --> 00:10:40,040
You know what?
Honestly, I have to say, notes

232
00:10:40,080 --> 00:10:45,440
are way like little card.
A note are more impressive to

233
00:10:45,440 --> 00:10:47,880
me, like a box.
I I agree.

234
00:10:47,880 --> 00:10:50,680
And actually, now that you said
that, I remember I still do have

235
00:10:50,680 --> 00:10:53,360
a Valentine's note saved from my
ex-husband.

236
00:10:53,760 --> 00:10:56,320
Yeah, I know because it was like
it was a rare thing.

237
00:10:56,320 --> 00:10:58,280
Yeah, it was actually a lovely
little note.

238
00:10:58,320 --> 00:10:59,720
That's because it's.
Thoughtful, right?

239
00:10:59,840 --> 00:11:03,360
It's like it's meaningful.
So I just think that the amount

240
00:11:03,360 --> 00:11:05,800
of effort put into not
celebrating a holiday could

241
00:11:05,800 --> 00:11:08,520
easily transfer into a little
gesture.

242
00:11:08,600 --> 00:11:11,400
Yeah, like 10 minutes.
Yeah, You could just write a

243
00:11:11,400 --> 00:11:13,120
cute little thing, yeah.
Something.

244
00:11:13,360 --> 00:11:14,760
Anything just.
Like a wee thing.

245
00:11:15,040 --> 00:11:18,680
I did have a very and
Valentine's one once, but in

246
00:11:18,680 --> 00:11:23,000
hindsight I realized it was it
was quite performative and love

247
00:11:23,000 --> 00:11:24,520
bommy.
Oh, love Bommy.

248
00:11:24,520 --> 00:11:26,080
Yeah, that's a red flag.
Yes.

249
00:11:26,080 --> 00:11:27,400
I didn't know that a few years
ago.

250
00:11:27,400 --> 00:11:30,640
Now I know that.
Yeah, I did not know also at the

251
00:11:30,640 --> 00:11:32,920
time.
It was very interesting though.

252
00:11:32,920 --> 00:11:38,360
Like it was, it was like the
grand America, like stay like, I

253
00:11:38,360 --> 00:11:41,880
mean, it was very, very over the
top.

254
00:11:41,880 --> 00:11:45,840
Wow.
Roses, Champagne, the whole

255
00:11:45,840 --> 00:11:48,120
thing.
But then, never was another

256
00:11:48,120 --> 00:11:51,600
Valentine separated.
In fact, there was always like

257
00:11:51,600 --> 00:11:54,400
an incident around the holiday
after that.

258
00:11:55,080 --> 00:11:58,520
Oh yes.
Yes, Yep, I know exactly what

259
00:11:58,520 --> 00:12:01,480
you mean.
Yes, let's engineer a fight so

260
00:12:01,480 --> 00:12:04,120
that I do not have to perform
for the holiday or.

261
00:12:05,200 --> 00:12:07,920
And this is funny because it was
Mr. Shitty Pants.

262
00:12:08,360 --> 00:12:10,240
And I love.
That one year, explosive

263
00:12:10,240 --> 00:12:14,840
diarrhea was.
Well, that is exactly on brand

264
00:12:14,880 --> 00:12:16,600
and we.
Had to go to the ER and I was

265
00:12:16,600 --> 00:12:20,120
like, I don't think you go to
the ER for like the poops, like

266
00:12:20,120 --> 00:12:25,520
just don't eat, hydrate and, you
know, let it work through you.

267
00:12:25,800 --> 00:12:28,080
But no, we had to go.
Wow.

268
00:12:28,080 --> 00:12:30,800
And it was his year for
Valentine's, yes?

269
00:12:30,840 --> 00:12:33,720
Oh my God, yes.
There was a lot of shitting.

270
00:12:34,320 --> 00:12:36,240
There was.
A lot of shitting in that

271
00:12:36,240 --> 00:12:38,160
relationship.
What a metaphor.

272
00:12:38,160 --> 00:12:41,680
For, well, I mean literal and,
you know, figuratively.

273
00:12:41,800 --> 00:12:43,840
That man shat on you all the
time.

274
00:12:43,840 --> 00:12:47,200
Yes, I'm so glad you're done
with that.

275
00:12:47,200 --> 00:12:49,400
Me too.
But Oh my God, how did I not

276
00:12:49,480 --> 00:12:50,960
realize the volume of shit at
the.

277
00:12:51,080 --> 00:12:52,440
Time, good Lord.
Nice.

278
00:12:52,840 --> 00:12:55,640
Well, are you talking to anyone?
Do you have any prospects?

279
00:12:55,640 --> 00:12:58,440
Like, maybe not for Valentine's,
but for Beyond.

280
00:12:58,440 --> 00:13:04,280
You know, I really, I'm at the
point I feel like probably for

281
00:13:04,280 --> 00:13:07,800
one of the first time ever, I'm
just done like.

282
00:13:07,880 --> 00:13:10,920
There's no no.
There's just like a void like

283
00:13:11,240 --> 00:13:17,680
the the hope has drained from my
soul of dating because it's just

284
00:13:17,680 --> 00:13:20,800
like, weird.
It's just weird out there now.

285
00:13:20,840 --> 00:13:22,920
It's weird, but I thought you
were talking to somebody.

286
00:13:23,040 --> 00:13:26,440
Well, I did have a conversation
with a a man the other night

287
00:13:26,440 --> 00:13:29,920
that I I thought could
potentially be quite fun.

288
00:13:30,920 --> 00:13:32,600
Will I share?
That please.

289
00:13:32,800 --> 00:13:34,800
As my voice goes up five
octaves.

290
00:13:35,480 --> 00:13:39,000
Oh boy, I can't wait you.
Can you can tell, I mean, it's

291
00:13:39,000 --> 00:13:42,440
just this is not going to be a
shocking or an unusual story,

292
00:13:42,440 --> 00:13:46,720
which is kind of sad.
But so this guy we matched and

293
00:13:46,720 --> 00:13:51,440
he was actually from California
and he was a movie guy.

294
00:13:51,640 --> 00:13:55,160
Oh, I like it.
And you know, he wow, beautiful

295
00:13:55,160 --> 00:13:58,800
smile like leads with that.
And I'm like, oh, hi, how are

296
00:13:58,800 --> 00:14:01,280
you?
And he tells me he's here

297
00:14:01,280 --> 00:14:04,960
filming a documentary on snails.
Oh, that's so cool.

298
00:14:04,960 --> 00:14:08,880
The western beetle snail.
To be exact, I love snails,

299
00:14:08,880 --> 00:14:09,800
Claire.
I know.

300
00:14:09,800 --> 00:14:11,880
And I text you, right.
And you were like, actually,

301
00:14:11,880 --> 00:14:16,520
that's kind of hot because you
know, your job, your area, your

302
00:14:16,800 --> 00:14:18,760
you were into the creatures.
They're cute.

303
00:14:18,760 --> 00:14:21,520
I love me a little mollusk,
little gastropod a little.

304
00:14:23,120 --> 00:14:26,200
You see, I'm like, you know, he
probably wouldn't expect that

305
00:14:26,200 --> 00:14:28,960
response.
Typically turns like he was

306
00:14:29,200 --> 00:14:31,680
yanking my chain.
No, yes.

307
00:14:31,720 --> 00:14:33,680
And he actually was not making a
documentary.

308
00:14:33,680 --> 00:14:36,040
I guess that's his joke that he
uses.

309
00:14:36,160 --> 00:14:37,280
Oh fuck that guy.
Yeah.

310
00:14:37,280 --> 00:14:40,320
And I was like, no, like I am
the most, you know, this might

311
00:14:40,320 --> 00:14:43,880
be I can't I I take everything
so literally.

312
00:14:44,800 --> 00:14:47,640
Like when you're texting someone
like that doesn't come through

313
00:14:47,640 --> 00:14:48,880
as humor.
Right.

314
00:14:48,920 --> 00:14:52,320
Not at all, especially because
he specified like a species.

315
00:14:52,360 --> 00:14:54,720
I mean, you could be doing a
documentary on snails.

316
00:14:54,720 --> 00:14:56,960
There's some endangered snails
like down in Zion.

317
00:14:56,960 --> 00:14:58,800
Like I completely would have
believed that too.

318
00:14:58,800 --> 00:15:03,960
Legitimate places turns like he
was filming a western which he

319
00:15:03,960 --> 00:15:08,600
immediately like said oh it's
actually a western and then

320
00:15:08,600 --> 00:15:12,720
immediately said that he is
filming at a remote reservoir

321
00:15:13,160 --> 00:15:18,800
and said just immediately you
should come over tonight.

322
00:15:18,800 --> 00:15:20,840
We could just chill and watch a
movie.

323
00:15:20,960 --> 00:15:23,960
What do you think?
Now I also I'd like to point out

324
00:15:23,960 --> 00:15:27,880
that this is 12/20 at night.
Oh jeez, that's a booty.

325
00:15:27,880 --> 00:15:30,960
Call and I'm typically not up
that late but I had a lot of

326
00:15:30,960 --> 00:15:33,360
work and you know I need a
little transition time before I

327
00:15:33,360 --> 00:15:36,440
go to sleep.
Immediately says Yikes.

328
00:15:36,520 --> 00:15:41,480
I hope that wasn't too forward.
If it was I apologize.

329
00:15:42,080 --> 00:15:45,320
And I just said we bit late for
meeting up with strangers for

330
00:15:45,320 --> 00:15:48,280
the first time lol.
And he's like well we could get

331
00:15:48,280 --> 00:15:52,080
a drink or something instead.
I'm like did you not hear what I

332
00:15:52,080 --> 00:15:56,400
just said Then this is great.
Full disclosure I'm not looking

333
00:15:56,400 --> 00:15:59,880
for sex, just some good
conversation and maybe a little

334
00:15:59,880 --> 00:16:02,160
kissing.
Don't get the wrong idea.

335
00:16:03,320 --> 00:16:06,560
Don't get the wrong ideas.
I text you, you should come over

336
00:16:06,560 --> 00:16:09,040
at 12:20 PM.
Yeah, AM sorry.

337
00:16:09,280 --> 00:16:13,720
And so I, you know, I just went
on to be like, wait, you invited

338
00:16:13,720 --> 00:16:16,480
me to a remote reservoir in the
middle of the night that's 90

339
00:16:16,480 --> 00:16:18,960
minutes from my house.
Like, sorry, like, I need

340
00:16:18,960 --> 00:16:22,280
answers here.
You know, I was like, has that

341
00:16:22,280 --> 00:16:23,640
worked for you before?
Just.

342
00:16:23,960 --> 00:16:25,400
Yeah.
Curious.

343
00:16:25,840 --> 00:16:28,440
And yeah.
And so it went on to even more

344
00:16:28,440 --> 00:16:31,760
weird things.
And, you know, I just said good

345
00:16:31,760 --> 00:16:34,880
night, have good sleeps and hope
you find a decent movie, pal.

346
00:16:35,360 --> 00:16:38,600
And he said, I'm not looking for
any old pal.

347
00:16:38,600 --> 00:16:42,120
I'm just talking to you tonight.
Wow.

348
00:16:42,720 --> 00:16:44,160
Yeah.
OK, that's the end of that

349
00:16:44,160 --> 00:16:45,880
conversation.
Well, that's weird, yeah.

350
00:16:46,000 --> 00:16:49,680
Like just hi cute smile
documentary about snails.

351
00:16:49,680 --> 00:16:51,360
Just kidding.
You want to come over?

352
00:16:52,320 --> 00:16:56,680
Not to fuck, not to fuck.
Just a kiss and talk, but I only

353
00:16:56,680 --> 00:16:59,400
want you.
Wow, okay.

354
00:16:59,800 --> 00:17:02,920
You're just like, why at this
age?

355
00:17:02,960 --> 00:17:06,200
Why?
Why if I was 25, maybe like,

356
00:17:06,200 --> 00:17:08,200
come on.
Maybe.

357
00:17:08,839 --> 00:17:09,880
What have you got?
Yikes.

358
00:17:10,079 --> 00:17:12,800
Any prospects?
Well, I did talk to a couple of

359
00:17:12,800 --> 00:17:16,000
people from the apps.
I talked to one who initially

360
00:17:16,000 --> 00:17:18,960
was kind of promising.
We grew up in the same area.

361
00:17:19,599 --> 00:17:21,680
Yeah, right.
We graduated from rival high

362
00:17:21,680 --> 00:17:26,280
schools, right in California.
So we started talking, and he

363
00:17:26,280 --> 00:17:31,240
asked me, like, if I was LDS.
And I said, well, I used to be,

364
00:17:31,240 --> 00:17:33,520
but that was a really long time
ago.

365
00:17:33,640 --> 00:17:35,760
You know, I didn't tell him my
whole story, but I was like,

366
00:17:35,760 --> 00:17:37,760
it's been like since my early
20s.

367
00:17:39,000 --> 00:17:44,160
And he said that he kind of just
recently got out of the Mormon

368
00:17:44,160 --> 00:17:45,720
church.
So he said I moved to Utah.

369
00:17:45,720 --> 00:17:49,120
I did the whole Mormon thing,
married twice in the temple, got

370
00:17:49,120 --> 00:17:52,120
tired of people telling me how
to live my life, then left this

371
00:17:52,120 --> 00:17:53,920
past October.
Now I'm non religious.

372
00:17:54,320 --> 00:17:58,000
And I said oh, OK, so you're a
brand new ex MO and he's like

373
00:17:58,000 --> 00:18:02,800
don't call me an ex Mormon.
I was like, OK, I know.

374
00:18:03,040 --> 00:18:05,720
He's like, I just do me.
I don't talk badly about it.

375
00:18:05,720 --> 00:18:08,480
I don't care about politics,
religion or watching the news.

376
00:18:08,960 --> 00:18:11,720
Oh my God, Cam dying.
I took a wee breath.

377
00:18:11,880 --> 00:18:14,600
I was like, okay.
And then he's like, does it

378
00:18:14,600 --> 00:18:16,160
bother you?
I don't have any animosity

379
00:18:16,160 --> 00:18:19,480
towards the Mormon church.
I was like, no dude, I was just

380
00:18:19,480 --> 00:18:22,200
trying to like get your back
story.

381
00:18:22,200 --> 00:18:24,880
You're like, it bothers me, your
level of animosity.

382
00:18:24,880 --> 00:18:28,200
Towards life, right?
Seriously.

383
00:18:28,200 --> 00:18:30,760
And then he dropped it.
He had eight kids from his two

384
00:18:30,760 --> 00:18:33,920
tumble marriages were.
Like hard pass.

385
00:18:34,280 --> 00:18:37,960
Yeah, so I'm trying to sort of
start the slow fade away, like

386
00:18:38,000 --> 00:18:41,400
over text, right?
And then he sends me these two

387
00:18:41,400 --> 00:18:42,760
texts.
First of all, what are you

388
00:18:42,760 --> 00:18:44,680
looking for?
A non religious guy in a

389
00:18:44,680 --> 00:18:46,120
religious state.
Question mark.

390
00:18:46,760 --> 00:18:49,200
I mean yeah, obviously, but I
didn't, I didn't answer that.

391
00:18:49,600 --> 00:18:51,960
And then he said so because you
don't believe in any religion

392
00:18:51,960 --> 00:18:54,280
you don't mind having sex?
Just want to make sure you won't

393
00:18:54,280 --> 00:18:56,320
get sad when we have sex for
feeling bad.

394
00:18:57,400 --> 00:18:59,200
What?
Yeah.

395
00:18:59,400 --> 00:19:01,280
Oh my God.
I know I'm like.

396
00:19:02,040 --> 00:19:04,480
You're like, that would be a
hard pass Goodbye knowing.

397
00:19:04,720 --> 00:19:08,520
Yeah, like we just started
talking on an app I've never met

398
00:19:08,520 --> 00:19:11,920
you like, and suddenly you're
assuming that we're going to

399
00:19:11,920 --> 00:19:13,800
have sex.
Excuse me.

400
00:19:14,440 --> 00:19:16,800
So I said I don't think this was
going to work out.

401
00:19:17,040 --> 00:19:18,560
I'm going to end this
conversation.

402
00:19:18,560 --> 00:19:21,160
Best wishes.
And then I blocked him.

403
00:19:21,520 --> 00:19:22,520
Nice.
And then?

404
00:19:22,840 --> 00:19:24,720
Oh my God.
He went on Tinder and found me

405
00:19:24,720 --> 00:19:26,840
there.
Oh my gosh, me Super spied me

406
00:19:26,840 --> 00:19:28,400
there.
Oh no.

407
00:19:28,560 --> 00:19:32,080
So I blocked him there too.
Wow.

408
00:19:32,760 --> 00:19:37,640
Yeah, well, good time.
Is this a hopeless Valentine or

409
00:19:37,640 --> 00:19:38,440
do?
We have hope.

410
00:19:38,520 --> 00:19:42,680
Maybe, Well, we might have hope.
Well, we're running a little

411
00:19:42,680 --> 00:19:44,640
long, but I guess I can share
one more thing.

412
00:19:44,920 --> 00:19:48,320
So I did go on a date with
someone, a first date.

413
00:19:48,360 --> 00:19:54,400
He seems real nice and we played
pickleball and had a quick

414
00:19:54,400 --> 00:19:55,920
drink.
That's a cute date.

415
00:19:55,920 --> 00:19:58,280
Super cute date, right?
Like an activity, super low

416
00:19:58,280 --> 00:19:59,520
pressure.
It was fun.

417
00:20:00,360 --> 00:20:03,880
And he sent me this message.
I'm just going to read it

418
00:20:03,880 --> 00:20:07,360
because I feel like this is a
tale of two Valentine's, right?

419
00:20:07,640 --> 00:20:08,640
Right.
Do you think?

420
00:20:08,760 --> 00:20:10,800
Yeah.
Well, I would like to end on

421
00:20:10,800 --> 00:20:11,960
hope.
A high note.

422
00:20:11,960 --> 00:20:13,720
And and nice.
Let me redo this.

423
00:20:13,720 --> 00:20:14,920
Let.
Me redo this.

424
00:20:15,040 --> 00:20:16,440
I'm waiting with.
My Kleenex.

425
00:20:17,280 --> 00:20:20,320
Hi Melissa, you are really
sweet, playful and fun.

426
00:20:20,320 --> 00:20:21,800
I'd love to go on another date
with you.

427
00:20:22,200 --> 00:20:24,600
I'll give you some time to
reflect and decide whether a

428
00:20:24,600 --> 00:20:27,320
schmuck like me who doesn't
scuba dive is worthy to date

429
00:20:27,320 --> 00:20:29,160
you.
I can handle the truth.

430
00:20:29,160 --> 00:20:32,320
So here's my phone number for
you to either ignore or call

431
00:20:32,320 --> 00:20:34,600
text.
I enjoyed playing pickleball

432
00:20:34,600 --> 00:20:36,400
with you.
Thanks for putting up with a

433
00:20:36,400 --> 00:20:38,240
tennis player.
You're a really good player by

434
00:20:38,240 --> 00:20:39,840
the way.
Very natural with a good head on

435
00:20:39,840 --> 00:20:43,280
your shoulders just to keep the
ball in play, which is 90% of

436
00:20:43,280 --> 00:20:46,160
the competitive spirit.
Although tonight wasn't so much

437
00:20:46,160 --> 00:20:48,600
competitive as it was getting to
know you, I think you're very

438
00:20:48,600 --> 00:20:50,240
attractive.
Have a good night.

439
00:20:50,280 --> 00:20:52,320
Maybe I should have been more
gentlemanlike and offered you a

440
00:20:52,320 --> 00:20:55,000
ride in case you felt under the
influence that you seemed fine.

441
00:20:55,200 --> 00:20:56,320
I would have just dropped you
off.

442
00:20:56,680 --> 00:20:58,400
Thanks again, I had a great
night.

443
00:20:58,960 --> 00:21:01,520
What?
Oh my God.

444
00:21:01,640 --> 00:21:04,480
Like he covered everything in
there.

445
00:21:04,480 --> 00:21:08,400
Isn't that so sweet?
So what you're telling me is

446
00:21:08,400 --> 00:21:10,800
it's possible?
So what I'm telling you is,

447
00:21:10,800 --> 00:21:13,960
regardless of whether anything
works out with this man, yeah,

448
00:21:13,960 --> 00:21:16,040
some men are good people.
They are.

449
00:21:16,160 --> 00:21:18,960
And we just need to find them.
We just.

450
00:21:18,960 --> 00:21:23,280
Need to find them on in real
life on the app somewhere.

451
00:21:23,320 --> 00:21:26,360
Yeah yes, agreed.
Even if you never saw him again.

452
00:21:26,360 --> 00:21:27,840
What a gentleman.
Right.

453
00:21:27,840 --> 00:21:29,320
They're out there.
They exist.

454
00:21:29,320 --> 00:21:32,200
I mean, the effort, the thought
and the kindness that comes

455
00:21:32,200 --> 00:21:33,960
through in that message, I think
is just outstanding.

456
00:21:34,120 --> 00:21:36,920
That's a manly man right there.
Yes, this is our healthy

457
00:21:36,920 --> 00:21:39,800
masculinity.
Yes 100% I love this for.

458
00:21:39,800 --> 00:21:41,760
You OK?
Well, I just love this period

459
00:21:42,000 --> 00:21:44,440
and I think maybe it should give
us both hope.

460
00:21:44,960 --> 00:21:46,840
I hope so.
There's men like us out there,

461
00:21:46,840 --> 00:21:49,520
just like probably they're
trying to sift through all the

462
00:21:49,520 --> 00:21:53,600
bullshit too, yeah.
And and just want pleasant,

463
00:21:53,720 --> 00:21:55,320
nice.
Yes, yes.

464
00:21:56,480 --> 00:21:59,120
Tale of two Valentine's just the
one, please.

465
00:21:59,240 --> 00:22:02,560
Yeah, well, there is one
Valentine in my life, and that's

466
00:22:02,560 --> 00:22:05,040
you, my love.
Back at you, Queen.

467
00:22:05,680 --> 00:22:08,840
All right, friends, salty hoes,
salty Bros Happy Valentine's

468
00:22:08,880 --> 00:22:11,080
Day.
I hope whatever your status,

469
00:22:11,080 --> 00:22:14,080
whether married, dating or
single, you have a lovely day.

470
00:22:14,240 --> 00:22:17,880
And hopefully we managed to keep
you company if if you are

471
00:22:18,040 --> 00:22:20,840
spending it like we are.
Alone, alone.

472
00:22:22,520 --> 00:22:24,040
All right.
Catch you next time, friends.

473
00:22:24,040 --> 00:22:25,560
Goodbye.
Later, bye.